Disclaimer: not mine.

A/N: okay….please review. This chapter has a little something for those Severus/Hermione fans too! Don't worry though…this is a LM/HG fanfic. Enjoy and please let me know what you think.

Chapter 21

Blood and Trust

And I'll cry for you
Yes, I'll die for you
Pain in my heart it is real
And I'll tell you now how I feel inside
Feel in my heart it's for you
And I'll take everything
As it comes my way
Pushin' your pain 'round my door
Will I cry for you as I die for you
Is this blood on my hands all for you?

--Candlebox

The darkness devoured her. She was surrounded by hate and fear. It all seemed to come back to her in these flashes of despair. It came crashing into her, awakening yet more parts with each memory touched. An image stood out above all others…an image that said hate…an image that stood on the side of evil and toyed with those around him. It was the same image she saw in the Department of Mysteries. His white blond hair falling down his back, his eyes glinting with malice…Lucius Malfoy was the enemy.

She sat up in bed, breathing heavy, panic taking control. She looked around the darkened room. She was in the house of the enemy. The enemy…Harry and Ron were her best friends…she seemed to remember who everyone was. How could they let her sit in this house? Were they not trying to rescue her? Hermione looked around her room. It looked lived-in, as if she were settled into this room. Noticing her wand on her night table, she picked in up and headed into the next room—Lucius' room.

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He wasn't alone. He could feel it. Someone was in the room with him. Slowly opening his eyes, he saw her. Standing at the end of his bed, in her now wrinkled ball gown, holding her wand on him was Hermione Granger. Her eyes were full of a new recognition and…hatred. With each quick deep breath she took, he could see the fear in her eyes. Yes, she remembered what an evil arse he was, but obviously, the events with the cabin had not come to her yet. Sitting up slowly, Lucius eyed her warily.

"Miss Granger to what do I owe this late night visit?"

Her forehead scrunched and her head cocked to the side in indignation. Her memories were confusing and made no sense to her. She had memories of her trip in time…what happened in that time anyway and she had memories of all the things the adult Lucius had done to them in the name of Voldemort. The confusing part was she could remember everything from the time she woke up in the hospital wing at Hogwarts and the events following were confusing when compared to the two separate Lucius' she seemed to remember. At what point did he become her protector?

Hermione's hesitation as she thought and tried to piece it all together was just what was needed.

"Expelliramus!"

Her wand flew through the air and as Draco caught it, Severus took hold of her arms from behind. She tried to jerk her arms out of his grasp, but to no avail. As Lucius climbed out of bed, her eyes fell upon the Dark Mark burning in his skin. He walked up to Hermione and stood tall only inches from her. Severus noticed the Dark Mark on Lucius' arm burning as well.

"Go to him Lucius. I'll keep on eye on the insufferable girl."

She tried to jerk away again, but Severus' jerky tightened grip stopped her movement. Lucius stared into the fire dancing in her eyes. Unconsciously, he licked his lips. He could see her clearly in his mind, underneath him only hours ago. Now, here she was, being held "captive" by Severus. The Death Eater in him told him to take what he wanted. His mark burned and he looked up at Severus.

"Keep an eye on her."

With a flick of his wand, Lucius was dressed in his Death Eater robes and mask. Severus felt Hermione cringe up against his chest at the sight. In seconds, Lucius was gone.

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With his mind clear of all things…all things that could cause trouble, Lucius stood before the Dark Lord.

"Bellatrix found Jacoby's body just outside these gates, Lucius."

Lucius remained silent, aware that this was not a question. The seconds of silence ticked by in what seemed like minutes.

"How did he fail Lucius?"

"My lord, there were many Order members present and they are all very protective of the girl."

Silence.

"But my dear Lucius, you were there. It was your party…your house. You are capable of such a simple task as ensuring a fellow Death Eater's success?"

"Yes, my lord."

"That is what I thought…"

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Hermione sat in the drawing room, curled up in a chair with a book. She was unable to sleep trying desperately to connect the dots of her memories. The manor was eerily silent. She was unable to leave the manor, Severus had seen to that before going back to bed. As soon as everyone was back to bed, Hermione flooed Harry. He would want to know where Dumbledore's murderer was.

Harry appeared in the drawing room of Grimmauld Place looking ruffled and sleepy. After profusely apologizing for waking him, she informed him of Severus' whereabouts. He was silent for a moment before responding.

"Hermione do you remember a memory we were suppose to look at together before your accident?"

She shook her head no. Harry took a deep breath preparing an explanation.

"Well, I had to go it alone. It was a memory that Professor McGonagall had obtained from Snape. Dumbledore asked Snape to kill him, made him promise even."

Hermione looked around rather frantic.

"Why would Dumbledore do that Harry?"

Harry was quiet for a moment.

"Several reasons. To save us…me, you, Draco, Snape…all of us and to secure Snape's position with Voldemort."

Now, thirty minutes later, Hermione sat there reading and trying to piece it all together, but there were still pieces missing. With her eyes scanning the book she held, her mind settled into trying to find clues to the missing pieces. The remainder of the night passed into a dawning light with no sign of Lucius. When Draco and Severus awoke and found Hermione still in the drawing room with no sign of Lucius worry set in and word was sent out immediately. Hermione could understand the Order's interest in Lucius' disappearance—Voldemort was up to something if his rumored right hand man was missing.

Hermione peered around the corner of the drawing room as members of the Order poured into Malfoy Manor. The question hung in the air…all wanting an answer…where was Lucius Malfoy?

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Hermione was packed…all but her schoolbooks. Each night pieces of her missing memory filled in completing the picture that was Lucius Malfoy in her mind. It was still confusing, but only as he had been previously. No matter, it felt good to remember. Her books were left in the library where she and Draco were working on their DADA project.

The manor bounced from an eerie quiet to full of noise from Order members in his search. She noticed Draco when she stepped into the library. He stood at a window looking out over the gardens. The day was dreary and dark. Draco saw her reflection in the window and heard her gathering her things.

"He should have let them take you."

Hermione looked up. Draco turned around to look at her with the hatred he normally held for her.

"Draco, that is not necessary." Remus had stepped in hearing Draco's words.

Draco's eyes turned to Remus and then back to Hermione.

"Yes it is. Jacoby's job was to bring Hermione to the Dark Lord. Father chose to kill him to prevent it happening."

Remus sighed and stepped farther into the room.

"Yes, Draco. He made that choice."

Draco's eyes narrowed between the two again.

"Yes, well…this is a war. Sacrifices are to be made," Draco stated looking Hermione up and down. "You are not exempt from those sacrifices."

Hermione stood there with her books over her shoulder frozen to the spot. Lucius was missing because he saved her? The thought of Lucius Malfoy saving her echoed in her mind. He had indeed, but at what price.

"Go on Hermione," Remus said. "I need to have a word with Draco."

Nodding her head mutely, Hermione left them in the library. As she headed down the hallway toward her room, she saw Harry walk out of the room he was staying in for the night. She stopped, smiling at him, glad to have a friend near.

"The Order has gone barking mad over this Malfoy thing."

Hermione shrugged her shoulders to indicate she didn't understand it either. Harry took another step toward her with his hands in his pocket.

"You know, Hermione I thought it was crazy for McGonagall to send you with him to begin with. Professor or not he is a Death Eater."

Hermione nodded her head in agreement, but something nagged and pulled at her. There was a piece of the puzzle she still didn't have. A piece she didn't have to begin with.

"You don't find it odd that the Order is so insistent on finding him, Harry? Like there is something they are not telling us."

Harry shrugged.

"That wouldn't be anything new."

With his hands in his pocket and his eyes cast down to his feet, Harry followed Hermione to her room.

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With her memory back and members of the Order strategically placed within the train, Hermione and Draco were allowed to ride the Hogwarts Express back to school. Draco bid them a rather unfriendly farewell as he entered the train in search of his fellow Slytherins.

"You'd think Malfoy would at least try to be nicer," Ron grumbled as he made his way into a compartment.

Hermione rolled her eyes.

"Give him time, Ron. People don't change over night you know."

Ron said nothing as he threw himself into a seat by the window. Ron waited until Harry, Hermione, and Ginny were seated before he continued.

"I personally don't know why everyone is looking for Lucius Malfoy…he was called by you-know-who. It's not like his loyalties are a secret."

Hermione stared at Ron. After blinking a couple of times her attentions turned to the passing landscape. She didn't know what to think. Ron continued his tirade about Lucius Malfoy the Death Eater until Hermione could no longer sit there listening. Standing up she excused herself, stepping out into the corridor.

Not many students were wandering the corridors. They seemed eerily deserted and abandoned just as Platform 9 ¾ had seemed abandoned. Voldemort was the cause for this. As she traveled the corridor, her thoughts wandered beyond Voldemort to Lucius. Where was he?

She paused in the corridor, pulling out the compass and looking at it. The combination of her memories from before and after the memory loss gave her a different view…a view into the adult Lucius, though not complete or comprehensible. Out of the darkness, behind her, she felt the soft caress of someone's breath on her neck.

"Are we…up to something Miss Granger? Do you need a detention already?"

Hermione rolled her eyes at the deep voice of her ex-potions master. With her memory loss came getting to know Severus Snape once again and thus she knew him on a new different level other than just an ex-professor. Turning around slowly she looked him up and down with own eyebrow arched. He stood in the shadows before her in a long black cloak with the hood up hiding his face.

"If you were still my professor that prospect might frighten me, but as you are no longer my professor…well, let's just say it doesn't frighten me so much." She looked over what he was wearing. "Are you trying to frighten first years, Severus?"

He sneered in response, but that served only to make Hermione laugh. At this point she knew him too well to find it disconcerting in the least. He rolled his eyes.

"As insufferable as ever I see."

Hermione nodded her head, but then grew quiet. They stood there. Hermione looking at her feet feeling slightly guilty for the laughter when Lucius was missing. Severus stood there watching Hermione.

"Mister Weasley is not worried about your whereabouts?"

Hermione looked up, wondering where that question came from. She shook her head no.

"No, we're still friends, but we stopped seeing each other before Halloween."

Severus nodded his head.

"Yes, well…I never could see that one working."

Hermione looked up at him trying to decide whether to be insulted.

"Pardon?"

With an exasperated sigh that was typical for Severus, he explained.

"You were always much too smart for the boy. You were always better suited for someone…older."

Placing the hood back up on his cloak he stepped back farther into the shadow as a student passed by.

"Severus," Hermione began tentatively. "Draco blames me for Lucius' disappearance. Is it true? Is Lucius missing because he was protecting me?"

He lowered his hood. His black hair framed his pale face. His eyes bore into her with an odd glint unfamiliar to Hermione.

"It is possible, Miss Granger, but he is not the first man to protect you. Personally, I found it tiring year after year…"

"Yes, you made it all too obvious."

His head tilted toward her as if asking 'what do you mean.' She smiled slightly as she remembered what it was like to be his student.

"You hated teaching me. You have previously admitted such…"

"No, Miss Granger. You are mistaken. I said I found pleasure in it."

She looked at him skeptically as she thought back to their conversation at the Malfoy Christmas ball. Yes, perhaps in a warped round about way he did say he found pleasure in teaching her. A bittersweet smile graced her lips as she looked down almost in embarrassment.

"All I ever wanted was your approval…your acceptance…acknowledgment. Ridiculous and childish I know, but it's always those professors that push you the hardest…the ones that force you to go beyond your potential…"

She shrugged slightly as she looked up at him. No smile was on his face. Instead, there was a serious look she could not recall ever seeing.

"I always acknowledged your intelligence…my approval and acceptance was there with every O you received."

She laughed.

"Your acknowledgement consisted of sneers when my hand was in the air and ignoring it…or calling me an 'insufferable know it all.' A girl needs more than that Severus." She was laughing, half joking. The sound of footsteps coming along the corridors alerted them to a student's approach in their direction. Severus was to remain hidden. Throwing his hood up, he grabbed Hermione and fell back with her into the shadows.

With his arms around her, holding her tightly against him in the shadows, hidden he looked down at her. It dawned on him as if someone had turned on the light switch. He always knew it, but the implications came to light. He was not her professor. Lucius was. For once, Severus did not stop to analyze his behavior or what it could mean. Hermione's heart pounded as the student passed out of sight, but Severus kept a hold of her. His eyes closed for a moment as he took a deep breath and when he opened them, they possessed a smoldering look so unlike the Severus she remembered in the classroom. Possessively, hungrily, his lips crashed onto hers.

He mumbled into her mouth.

"Is this more like what you had in mind?"

She couldn't answer him…was she suppose to admit a schoolgirl crush on her professor? He felt her smile against his lips. As Severus caressed one side of her neck, his lips traveled to the other side. Her mind flashed to Lucius and why he was missing again. Later, Hermione would think it was possible that Severus simply used Legilimency on her to know where her mind went. He mumbled into her neck, between kisses.

"We do not know the real reason he is missing…realize this: I never called you a Mudblood."

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His world faded in and out…a hazy mist of reality. He stumbled grabbing hold of a tree for support. The dark forest surrounding him faded into pure blackness and then faded back into the hazy dark night. Dropping to the ground on his knees, he felt the liquid oozing down the side of his face. Reaching up touching the side of his head, he saw the blood covering his hands…it was only one of the places he was bleeding profusely. His energy was fading just as his life was. As he crawled through the forest, he felt the blood pouring from his leg, pouring from his head, covering his face. The forest began to thin and the moonlight shone down on his crumpled crawling form. Peering down at his blood covered hands his mind became a myriad of images and thoughts. Why did he do it? In the distance, through the thinning out trees he saw the hazy outline of a castle. Looking back down at his blood soaked hands, one thought filled his mind at that moment.

Is this blood on my hands all for you?