A/N: There are two more chapters that introduce the general storyline, before things really get to the central point of the story in chapter four. Please bear with me until then. Also, the story is rated M for chapters like the following. Consider yourself warned.

Chapter 2: TOW Joey and Rachel get together

Seven weeks earlier – day 1 (of Joey and Rachel's relationship, timeline is counted up from this day on)

For a while now Joey had been watching Rachel reading a magazine while shaking her head in short intervals. "You don't agree with 'Cosmo' today?" he asked after a few minutes.

"You're watching me read?" she asked indignantly.

"I'm bored. So?"

She sighed dramatically, deciding that since he probably wouldn't leave her alone anyway, she might as well tell him. "It's this article about 'Spicing up your sex life."

"You want to spice up your sex life, Rach?" he grinned.

"Well, even if I did, I wouldn't try it the way they suggest," she sniped back.

"What do they suggest? Oh, wait … let me guess…having sex in public," he said, leering suggestively.

She looked at him, frowning. "You've already read it?"

"No, but I guess I could've written it."

She figured that it might be actually interesting to hear what Joey would have to say to that, so she put the magazine away and went to the kitchen to get herself something to drink. On the way over she tried to sound very casual while asking, "Then maybe you could explain to me how having sex in a janitor's closet is even gonna work?"

Joey laughed for a while until he realized that she was obviously expecting an answer. "Seriously? Rachel, what are you? A fifteen year old virgin?"

She scowled at him angrily. "Hey, answer the question. How do you do it in a room where two people barely fit in?"

He stood up from the lounger and walked over to her, looking a bit as if he wanted to explain something really complicated to someone really stupid. "Uhm… but you've already heard that there is the possibility of doing it standing, right?"

"I've heard of it, but it's not possible for me."

He shook his head with mock disbelief. "Come on, Rach, of course it's possible. I've done it a lot of times already."

"I didn't say it is generally impossible, I'm saying it's impossible for me. I'm so small and all the guys I've been with were taller than me, so it didn't work."

"What has your size to do with anything?" he asked, looking genuinely puzzled.

"Look," she said standing beside him pointing first at her own hip, then at his.

"… everything on me is like – down there, and everything on you is like – up there. See, totally wouldn't work."

Joey snickered with barely concealed glee. "Rach, of course you can't stand on your feet while it happens. The guy has to lift you up."

"Joey, I said I'm small. That doesn't mean one guy can hold me the whole time. I didn't exactly go out with bodybuilders. And, you know, what about all the movement that is required? I can't see how that'll work."

Without warning Joey pushed her against the nearest wall, grabbed her thighs and wrapped her legs around him. He pressed himself flush against her and she admitted to herself that the only reason it wouldn't work right now was all the clothes that were in the way.

"See, this is what I'm talking about. The wall supports most of your weight, you can hold yourself up with your arms and legs and I am not gonna demonstrate how the movement is gonna work but you have to believe me, it works just fine."

A tremor ran through his body at the thought of actually doing this with her. Her barely audible sigh made him think that she had noticed his reaction.

"Yeah, I think I understand the concept now. I just hope no one's gonna come in right now. They might be tempted to misinterpret a perfectly innocent situation."

He let her down gently and they spent an awkward pause trying to smooth invisible wrinkles out of their clothes. Rachel was the first to break the uncomfortable silence. "Wow, looks like 'Joey love' is really something special."

A slightly proud grin stole onto his lips before he looked down, embarrassed. "Look Rach, I'm sorry, I guess I didn't think that through. I wasn't meaning to hit on you or something."

"No, I know, Joey. You don't have to be sorry. It's just … I think I felt something. Didn't you feel anything?"

"Yes, I think I did. But you know, we're both pretty hot, so, it's probably normal."

"Yeah, you're probably right. It just felt like the two of us would be… a perfect fit."

They both stared at each other, trying to make sense of their suddenly very confusing emotions. "I made us drop out of the friend zone, didn't I?" Joey guiltily admitted.

"Yes, maybe. I'm just not sure if this is a good or a bad thing. I… I have to go to work."

"It's seven in the evening Rachel, why would you go to work now?"

"It usually helps me clear my head and get a bit of perspective on complicated emotional stuff."

She grabbed her jacket she discarded just a few hours ago and stormed out of the door.

………

When she came back seven hours later, she found Joey fast asleep on the Barcalounger. She was glad about that, because, although she'd gotten a lot of work done, she hadn't been getting anywhere in the 'thinking about Joey' department. Not that she didn't think about him, it just hadn't gotten her anywhere. She felt like she was thinking in circles, so she finally gave up on figuring things out and went home, hoping he might be asleep already.

He was lying there in his bathrobe, tightly curled together as if he was cold. Rachel took a blanket from the couch and covered him with it, spending a few moments looking at the peaceful expression on his face.

She never allowed herself to think about him this way, but there was no denying that he was strikingly handsome. The incident from before had given her a taste of what being with him could be like. Never had she considered that his womanizing lifestyle could actually be considered a plus when thinking about having a relationship with him. There was no doubt that he would know what he was doing, that his experience could be an advantage.

Sighing she got up and headed for the bathroom. If it were just about having someone to have great sex with, the decision would be a no-brainer. But she was too old, too jaded to get herself into this. She couldn't afford to get her heart broken again by someone who was not serious about a relationship, by men who couldn't resist the temptation of another woman only an hour after a non-break-up. And he was Joey.

Everything that was a plus in the 'having great sex' category came out a big fat minus as far as having a stable and trusting relationship went. Was she setting herself up for the inevitable by starting something with a man like him? Or worse, was she seeking it? Was she going after the wrong guys for some reason buried deep within her?

Why couldn't relationships come with a guarantee, why did they have to be so risky, so dangerous? Would being with him be worth all those risks?

Maybe. Probably. There was no way to know that for sure without trying it.

There it was again. The circle. She knew it was risky but she didn't know if it was worth it. She couldn't know if it was worth it without taking the risk.

All her thinking lasted for as long as she was in the bathroom, showering and preparing herself to go to bed. When she finally came out, Joey had settled under his blanket but still looked uncomfortable.

From the look of it he had waited for her to return. She couldn't just go to her own comfy bed, leaving him thereto wake up with cramps in the morning. After arguing with herself for a while, she decided to do the right thing and wake him upto send him to his bed.

"Joey, wake up," she whispered, softly stroking his face.

Before she could move away, he bolted upright and their heads met with an audible thump.

"Ouch!" both cried in unison, pressing their hands against the place where it hurt.

Rachel felt a bit dizzy and slumped down on the lounger. "God, I'm so sorry, Rachel, you startled me. Is everything all right, can you hear me? Do you think you have a concussion, should I call a doctor?"

"Wow, dial it down, Joey, it's nothing. I was just a bit faint from the pain, but it doesn't even hurt that much anymore, I'm good. I am a bit of a sissy when it comes to pain, that's all."

"I am sorry, I didn't mean to..."

"It's okay, Joe. Shh..."

She couldn't concentrate when he was babbling and she was trying to concentrate on what she felt right now, lying almost in his arms like that.

Since 'almost' wasn't enough for making an informed decision, she snuggled a bit closer. Yeah, that was more like it. Really nice and cozy. She could definitely get used to this.

She felt him moving closer as well, sending a flash of excitement through her.

"Want me to kiss it better?" he whispered into her ear with a warm, very deep, very sexy voice she'd never heard him use before.

"Hmmyeah," was about all she could manage at this point.

It was not so much the growing need inside of her that took her ability to speak, it was the realization that they were getting to the point where she had to make a decision one way or another. Staying friends or becoming something else. Safety or passion. She was starting to lean towards passion. He kissed the place on her forehead where they'd hit their heads together. Soothing, open mouthed kisses, soft and tender, wandering slowly down the side of her face. Before he reached the place she thought he was headed for – her mouth – he stopped and leaned back a little.

"Did some thinking at work?" he asked still with that rumbling sexy timbre.

That was it, the point of no return. Panic raced through her before a sudden flash of clarity gave her an idea. What about telling him about her fears? At least this way he would know what she expected, it would give him the opportunity to get out of this himself.

"I'm scared, Joey."

"Of what?"

"Of getting hurt again, of what happened with Ross happening again. And I don't want this to be just a one time thing. I need this to be real."

In this moment she wished there would've been more light in the apartment for her to judge the look on his face. "I did some thinking too," he said finally, when she already felt the panic rising in her chest again.

His fingers brushed lightly over her face in a loving gesture. "This is kinda new for me, but I don't want this to be a one night stand either. You mean a lot to me, Rachel. A lot. And I promise, I swear, I won't hurt you – ever."

She had to fight back the tears burning in her throat. "At least – not intentionally," he added with a smile in his voice, lightly touching the sore spot on her head.

"You can always kiss it better."

"You sure?"

"Yes, Joey, I'm sure."

When his lips were touching hers lightly in a deliciously sweet first kiss, she knew without a doubt that she made the right decision. As his kisses gained intensity, when his hands started to roam her body, she waited for the awkwardness to start, she waited for the urge to giggle, to push his hands away just because they were Joey's hands. The hands of a man she had considered her friend for seven years now. It never came. Instead she found herself arching into his exploring touch, answering his tender kisses with more demanding ones of her own.

Heat started to course through her veins and as admirable as Joey's self control was, she wanted more and she only knew of one way to show him. With a quick movement she turned him around onto his back and attacked him with feverish kisses.

He seemed to respond in kind until he suddenly groaned and pulled away from her.

"Argh… this is so uncomfortable…"

It took her about a second to jump off the chair and take at least three steps back.

"All right, Joe, we don't have to…" she stuttered, feeling too stupid and embarrassed for words. That was something that had never happened to her with any guy she had wanted to sleep with, but she figured that there was a first time for anything.

Joey looked totally flustered. "Rach, what…?"

"It's okay, this was probably a mistake anyway, let's not…"

"What are you talking about? I…" Then it looked like it finally hit him what her reaction was about. "Oh no… no, no Rachel, that wasn't what I meant, I… the chair… the armrest was poking in my back, that's what's uncomfortable."

He got up quickly and went over to where she was standing, taking her hand and slightly tugged at it as if he wanted to lead her to his bedroom.

"Rachel, please… I want this. Let's take this someplace where we have more… space."

Her embarrassment still lingering, she couldn't quite muster the excitement she had felt before and all the doubts and reservations came back in a rush.

"I don't know… maybe that was a sign... that we… shouldn't do it."

Still holding her hand he stopped tugging and looked down. "It's okay if you don't want to, but… maybe you should try and see if there are any more signs if it's a bed."

Her resistance dissolved at his words, and when the tugging started again, she let herself being led step by step towards his room.

He was moving backwards, and when they were finally in his room he pulled her to him and started kissing her again, in that tender, seductive way just like before. The heat was back in an instant, as if it only had been lurking in some part of her body, ready to pounce as soon as she had made up her mind.

She moaned and buried her hand in his hair, pulling him closer, deepening the kiss. At that he started to kiss her more aggressively, more determinedly. He gently guided her towards the bed and motioned for her to sit down, while he himself crouched down in front of her. He firmly held her gaze when he started to untie the knot on her bathrobe.

The fact that she was naked under there occurred to her the moment his nimble fingers had completely opened the knot. He was about to see her naked. The man who had slept with a million women, some of them stunningly beautiful, was about to see her naked. Selfconsciousness, formerly unknown to her, flooded her and she drew a sharp breath, prompting Joey to still his movements and look at her searchingly.

She dreaded the question he might ask, or better, she dreaded having to answer it, having to admit to that feeling of vulnerability.

But instead of asking a question, he slowly ran his hands up the front of her bathrobe and when he reached her neck, his fingers brushed against the soft skin there, only to travel further to the side, taking the piece of clothing with them.

With excruciating slowness, his gaze unwaveringly holding hers, he pushed the robe down her shoulders and then down her arms until it fell off by itself.

It was then his eyes started to wander over her body, taking in every square inch of exposed skin. Her heart hammered in her chest like crazy. She couldn't even tell if it was excitement or apprehension or maybe both. She felt her nipples harden just from the way he looked at them, she felt her body ache for his touch, her skin shiver in need of feeling his against it.

When he looked her in the eyes again, her doubts about herself vanished without a trace at seeing the honest admiration, the unveiled desire in his eyes.

"You are so beautiful," he whispered hoarsely and she couldn't help but believe him. She couldn't help the way her heart melted at this and her body almost started screaming for him.

He didn't let her wait. He put both his hands on her thighs and while drawing lazy circles on the inside of her thighs with his thumbs, he kissed her neck, moving a bit downwards with every one of these heat inducing touches of smooth lips against sensitive skin.

His hands wandered almost imperceptibly slowly up her thighs, his thumbs still caressing the soft skin. Involuntarily her legs spread a little, giving his hands even more room to do what felt so good. Meanwhile his lips had reached her breast and she threw her head back, moaning loudly at the sudden delight at feeling his mouth covering her nipple, surrounding it with hot wetness, teasing it with an astonishingly agile tongue. The thought of what else he might be able to do with that tongue tore another loud moan from her throat and she had to brace her arms behind her on the bed to keep her upper body upright.

When he changed sides, lavishing the same attention on her other breast, the feeling of air cooling the sensitized wet skin provided another extremely arousing sensation.

Her body hummed with sexual energy, her insides seemed to pulse in rhythm with her frantic heartbeat and for a fleeting moment she wondered why they were only doing this now. Her train of thought came to a screeching halt, however, when his roving hands finally reached their goal, when she felt his fingers delicately dipping in between her legs.

"Gah… oh Joey… yeah…" An unstoppable stream of appreciative utterances came out of her mouth when his fingers found the centre of her desire, skillfully bringing her arousal to an even higher level.

She was torn between wanting him to end the madness by bringing her to fulfilment as quickly as possible and wanting to endlessly enjoy the exquisite sensations he could so easily invoke in her.

His mouth left her breast and the trail of kisses went south, stopping at her bellybutton for a while until she gave up on wanting to keep upright and plopped backwards on the mattress with a loud groan.

A moment later she realized what she had invited him to do with that move, but being too wrapped up in herself to even lift her head she just whispered, "Joey, you don't have to…"

"I want to," he gave back in a ragged whisper and a split second later he did.

Nothing could've prepared her for how good it felt, for how close she came to the edge after just a few well placed licks. Just when she thought she would come any second he pulled back a bit, blowing a wisp of breath over her engorged flesh, making her wail with frustration.

He got back to work a second later but again, when the edge was just a hand's breadth away, he did the same thing. She vowed to herself to kill him should he do that again, but managed nothing more than a pleading, impatient moan.

Luckily for both of them, the next time he didn't stop. Every nerve ending began to burn and her body clenched tightly before an overwhelmingly intense wave of ecstasy swept her away and turned her vision black. The tremors ran through her again and again until every tension in her body had vanished and it felt like her body had turned to jelly.

It actually took a bit of an effort to open her eyes again and when she did, she looked into two pitch black eyes, the fire of passion visible deep within.

Letting her gaze travel down a bit, she noticed that he had gotten out of his bathrobe as well and that he obviously had moved her a bit so they both could lie on the bed comfortably. The thought that she hadn't noticed any of that made her smile.

"What is it?" he whispered.

"Just noticed that I must've blacked out for a while."

"That a good thing?"

"It is."

"Seen any signs so far?"

"No," she breathed, moving her hand further down his body, under the covers, until she reached his erection. He closed his eyes and moaned quietly when she lightly ran her hand down his length.

"I want you," she said and before she couldn't say or think anything else, his mouth was on hers, his tongue delving deeply into her mouth. Together with him lying almost on top of her it gave her the feeling of him being everywhere. But instead of this being scary or feeling like it was too much, it felt like there should be more.

If she had been able to say something, she would have told him that there was one more place she wanted him to be, but since she couldn't actually say it, she spread her legs and ground her hips wantonly against him.

Being obviously good at taking hints, he pulled back from her, fished something out of the nightstand and after putting on a condom wasted no more time gently easing himself inside her, in a way lacking the urgency he must have been feeling.

Still highly sensitive from what he had done before, her body welcomed him inside without resistance and the feeling of him stretching her, filling her, made her wish – hope – that this time it would be different. That with him, it would be enough just like this. Although just thinking of the many fruitless attempts at reaching an orgasm just through this cooled down her excitement considerably.

He began to move and she tried to empty her mind, to only concentrate on the sensations coursing through her at every one of his deliberate, slow thrusts. She enjoyed the feeling for a while until she noticed his breathing becoming ragged, his thrusts becoming erratic, although he apparently tried to hold back, to wait for her.

Another cold shower hit her at the realization that it wouldn't happen this time either. She didn't want him to wait for her, it was pointless anyway.

She drew his head to her and breathlessly whispered into his ear, "Let go, Joey. I won't… I can't…"

He went still on top of her, panting heavily. Just when she started to worry about what would happen now, she heard his voice rumbling into her ear. "Do you trust me?"

It was an odd question giving their current situation but it wasn't one she couldn't answer.

"I do. I trust you."

Her voice sounded a lot more breathless than she felt. Maybe the arousal was just hiding somewhere again, waiting for things to happen.

He pulled back from her and she couldn't help being disappointed at the loss of the feeling of him inside her. Then he took her right leg and put her foot over his left shoulder. After draping her left leg over his right shoulder in a similar way, he lifted her pelvis a bit and tilted her into a somewhat uncomfortable position. As she felt him pushing inside her again, he laced his fingers through hers and pressed her hands into the pillow on either side of her head.

She couldn't move at all and when she felt him pushing deeper and deeper, panic started to rise inside her. She was trapped.

"Rach… look at me," he said softly. When she did what he said, the panic subsided.

This was why he had asked her about trust and in this moment it became clear that her answer was the truth. She trusted him, she just knew that he would never hurt her.

She felt herself relax, giving up her resistance, giving herself over to him. It was up to him now. She never would've guessed what that notion alone did to her. It freed her of all the pressure of being responsible, of having to achieve something, of making sure to be good.

Just as he had done before, he held her gaze, not allowing her to close her eyes or look away. And she didn't feel the need to. Usually, she closed her eyes during sex, trying to concentrate on what she felt. She could still do that, but looking into his eyes allowed her to get lost in him, to see his feelings, to let him see hers. It built a connection that made this seem so much more than just a physical act, although with a sudden fiery rush, the need awoke again, reminding her that this was very much something physical, by warming her blood, speeding up her heartbeat and shortening her breath.

When he began to move again, a sudden jolt went through her, spreading rippling waves of pleasure through her whole body. She cried out softly and looked at him in surprise. A smile lit up his eyes that were still fixated on her face. "Found it," he murmured, repeating his move again, getting an ever stronger reaction out of her.

The exquisite pressure of being close began to build up inside her at an almost impossible speed. She didn't know if she wanted to laugh with joy or cry with relief. When she came, when her vaginal walls contracted around him, heightening the sensations, it sounded to her like she did a little bit of both.

He followed her over the edge with a loud groan.

After pulling back from her and carefully disentangling them from their position, he stretched out beside her, propping his head up on his hand and looked at her with a happy and slightly proud smile.

She returned his smile and mouthed, "Wow."

His expression became more serious and he obviously struggled with something he wanted to say.

"Rach… when you said you can't… what were you thinking?"

"What do you mean?"

"I had a feeling you were thinking yourself out of it. What was it?"

She closed her eyes for a second, contemplating not telling him, making something up like she always did with the other guys. Finding some lame excuse. Mostly she had avoided that question by faking it, even with the man she had loved. She didn't want to lie to Joey, though. He seemed like someone who could handle the truth.

"When I said I can't I meant… it never happened… like that," she admitted in a husky whisper.

Joey's eyes went wide. "What?"

Or not. "Joe, please…"

"It's just… Rach, you're so sensitive to everything…" he said quietly and dragged his fingertips over her body slowly. As if to prove his point, she couldn't suppress a content sigh at his touch. "…so sensual," Joey continued, "… it's kinda hard to believe."

"It's impossible for a lot of women," she said defensively.

"Not for you," he countered matter-of-factly.

She turned to him and said, "Only in that position."

His mouth curved into a mischievous smile as he admitted, "That only made you stop thinking."

Her eyes went wide at that. She had been convinced he had brought his knowledge about women's most sensitive spots to good use. But obviously, he knew more about women than where their erogenous zones were.

"I had no idea you were that manipulative," she smiled. "Does that mean it might happen again?"

His fingertips gently brushed over her breasts and it felt like little sparks of electricity charged her body with sexual energy once again.

"Definitely," Joey finally answered, looking at her with an odd seriousness.

She grinned at him delightedly.

"Wow, we've gotta try that."

"So you really want it to be more than just… this?" he asked, haltingly and still serious.

"Of course I do. I told you."

"Yeah, but…" he trailed off and sagged back against the pillow. "You wouldn't be the first woman to have second thoughts about that."

Cold crept down her spine at an unexpected realization. It wasn't only that he used women for meaningless sexual encounters. Probably more than once, it had had to be the other way around as well. He gave off something that made it easy to put him into a category, no different from what she had thought not too long ago. Womanizer; great to have sex with, not so good for a trusting, loving relationship. She wondered how many women had acted on that assumption, and with how many of them he had wanted it to be more. She knew of Kate, Ursula and Erin, but now it seemed like they hadn't been the only ones.

"Hey," she said while rolling over to be able to look at him, "I'm not having second thoughts. I just had… a pretty amazing experience and I'm not gonna turn my back on the man who I had it with. What's with you, do you have second thoughts now?" she teased.

"No, I mean… not about wanting to be with you, but… What about the others, what about…"

She hurriedly put her fingers over his lips, preventing him from saying the name that she didn't need to hear right now.

"Joey, why don't we take one step at a time, see where this is going? Look at Mon and Chandler. We didn't know about them for months."

He shook his head.

"I'm awful at keeping secrets. You know I can't lie."

She scooted closer to him until their bodies touched and her face was so close to him the tips of their noses bumped together.

"You don't have to," she whispered against his mouth before kissing him. "We live together, it's pretty easy to keep it from everyone for a while just by locking the door. And if they have a suspicion, if they ask, we'll tell them. So you won't need to lie."

He looked at her and she could still see a million questions lingering behind his eyes. It wasn't like she was completely convinced and sure of that herself, but right in that moment, feeling his body next to her, having his face so close, knowing what he could make her feel, she didn't care about the things outside this room, outside this bed.

"I feel so… weird," he whispered barely audible.

"Let me kiss it better," she whispered and then she did. When he finally kissed her back, it didn't take them long to arrive at the point where they were to find out if Joey's theory about her was right.

It didn't surprise her at all that it was.

tbc