A/N: Beware, some JnR mush is coming up. Cherish it, as far as this story goes, it has to last you for a while.

Chapter 3 - TOW all the love

Day 40

"Hey, look at you all dressed up."

Rachel closed the space between herself and Joey, who was standing in front of the mirror, trying to get his tie straight. She turned him around and tightened the knot of the tie herself. When she was finished with that she ran her hands wantonly over his chest.

"Hmm, am I not the lucky one? I'm gonna go home with the most gorgeous guy of the party."

She didn't quite know why she felt the need to seduce him right now. It was certainly not the best timing, since they were about to go to Monica and Chandler's wedding in a few minutes. But as always she couldn't keep her hands off him. And flattery always worked nicely.

"And I'm gonna go home with the most beautiful girl. I think this is the first time ever that I went to a wedding knowing beforehand I would have sex with the hottest of the bridesmaids."

She smiled at that. At first she had been uncomfortable with the thought that there had been so many women before her, but the way he treated her, like she was unique and the most amazing, most beautiful woman he'd ever met, made her realize that she didn't need to fear any competition. She was sure that those days were behind him and eventually she could even joke about that again. Like now.

"Oh come on, Joe. You always knew that beforehand."

"Yeah, you're right. But I swear I was never so looking forward to it."

He had become more comfortable with the subject, too. She knew that he had tried to hide this from her for a while, tried not to refer to past experiences, but it was a side of him that she would have had to accept sooner or later and it took them only a short while to get back to some of the old camaraderie from before. Like they were still friends who had great sex.

"Really? I mean, it's been five weeks, maybe it's starting to get a little old for you?"

That was something that was worrying her in a way. She was sure he wouldn't just lose interest and discard her like he did with the other girls. But the fire between them seemed so strong, she wondered if it would just burn out some day.

His expression suddenly became very serious. "Rachel, it will never ever get old. I love you."

Her heart skipped a beat and she stared at him with wide eyes.

"You… you love me?"

She'd never seen him so unsure, so nervous. He probably never put himself out there like that, setting himself up to get hurt. It was a first for him. Even if she hadn't known that before, seeing the look in his eyes, she would know it now. She was his first true love.

"Yes, I have been feeling that for a while now. I love you."

Happiness flooded her with the force of an incoming tide, washing away all the doubts and fears, the ifs and buts.

"I love you too, Joey. I do, I love you. The past five weeks have been amazing. I haven't been so happy in a very, very long time."

He smiled at her. A big, indescribably happy smile. Then he pulled her closer to him and put his arms around her, almost crushing her. "I've never been this happy ever, Rachel and if we didn't have to go to this wedding, I'd show you exactly what I feel for you."

Okay so, Monica was her best friend, but missing out on this? Really sucked.

"Do we really have to go to this wedding?"

He let go of her and tried hard to make a serious face.

"Let's think about it… the bride is your best friend, the groom is my best friend, I'm the minister, you're the maid of honor… I suppose - no."

She playfully swatted him against his chest. "Spoilsport!"

"Ouch!"

"Oh, did I hurt you, handsome? Come here, let me kiss it better."

She moved in to kiss him but he kept his distance. "I certainly expect you to kiss it better, but that will have to wait until after the wedding. Or at least after the ceremony."

There was a certain playfulness in his voice she was starting to recognize. Someone had obviously something up his sleeve. "What are you thinking?"

"The hotel has a very nice cozy room, where they keep the tablecloths and stuff, that would be just perfect for us."

She tried to hide a smile. "I don't even wanna know how you know about this."

"Hey, it was perfectly innocent. When Chandler showed me the place, I took the wrong door looking for the bathroom. And I thought it would be useful to remember where it is."

Of course he would.

In the past weeks he had gone to great lengths to make her 'catch up on my experiences', as he called it, and he wasn't limiting them to only their apartment. It was crazy sometimes but she would never have dreamed of how good it made her feel. It was exhilarating to just lose herself in him, to give in to her need for him, regardless of where they were. The thought alone, that she had almost chosen safety over this, was becoming unbearable. Even heartache was worth this.

She had become highly sensitive to every touch from him, to every nuance of his skilful lovemaking. It was like a new awareness, like she just discovered with what wide range of sensations her body was able to provide her. It felt like life itself was pulsing through her with every kiss he gave her, as if he had woken her up from a sleep.

"Hmm, sounds like this could be fun. Although…"

"What?"

There was something that had been bothering her for a while now. Sometimes their relationship still felt like an affair. Because they were hiding it from everyone. From their families and from their friends. And yes, they had decided together that it was okay for the time being, but now that she knew she was in love, she wanted to shout it from the rooftops.

"You know what would be fun too?"

"Just say it, Rach, we have to go in five minutes."

"Coming to that wedding arm in arm, kissing in public, sitting on your lap, dancing together really tight. Sneaking out and having sex in a dark closet and everyone knowing what we're doing."

"You want them to know about us?"

The happiness in his eyes told her that he'd wanted this for a long time already. "Yes, I want them to know about us."

"Even Ross?"

She wondered if he would ever completely lose his insecurity when it came to Ross. She wondered what she would have to do to convince him that she knew where she really wanted to be.

"Especially Ross."

"Rach, you don't know how much that means to me, but we can't do that today."

"Why not?" Of course she knew why. She just didn't want to wait.

"Remember how mad Monica got when you were stealing her thunder on her engagement day?"

"Oh, don't remind me of that."

"We'll tell them when they get back from their honeymoon, it's only ten days. And then we're Rachel and Joey."

"Joey and Rachel."

"Huh?"

"Joey and Rachel. Sounds better."

"I'll always put you first."

"I know. That's why I love you so much."

………

(present day – day 51 – seventh week of pregnancy)

As Joey was standing in front of the door to his apartment, he paused a while, thinking about what to say to Rachel, about what she would expect, how she would feel. But he couldn't imagine that, he didn't even know how he himself felt about her being pregnant. He knew how he felt about her though.

The days since Chandler and Monica's wedding had been wonderful. It was like in that movie they'd watched that one evening when Chandler and Monica wanted to have one last movie night as singles.

'The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.'

Okay, granted it was a bit cheesy and maybe he was becoming a sap, but he couldn't argue with the general statement. It was the greatest thing ever. It was like there was nothing more important than the two of them. They had made plans, talked about how to tell everyone, what to say to Ross. They fantasized about how it would be with everyone knowing about them.

With her, it was like it was becoming better with every day they were together. At first there was a bit of awkwardness when they settled into being a couple; there were things they thought they couldn't talk about anymore. But after a while, they'd started to get comfortable again, to be just themselves with added fun. They talked about the issues they'd tried to dodge before and they managed to figure out how to live with them.

When they finally found out they were in love, it felt like they were becoming more than just two people sleeping together. Suddenly he understood all the stuff Chandler kept telling him all the time. And now they were having a baby. He hoped Rachel could help him figure out what to do, what to feel.

When he stepped into the apartment, Rachel was pacing and looked up at him with tears in her eyes.

"What did they say?" she asked as soon as he had closed the door behind him.

"Nothing, they were pretty floored and I left a few seconds after you."

"God, that was so not how I wanted them to learn about us."

"I know, Rach, but… it's too late now. Why didn't you throw that test in our trash? Didn't you want me to know?"

"I… I don't know, Joey! I don't know anything. I just know that when I looked into my calendar this morning I was so happy because we were going to tell everyone tomorrow and then could start to really be together; and then I realized that I was two weeks late already and now everything is upside down. Suddenly I'm pregnant and everyone has to figure out from that what's up with us and… I just don't know what to think… or what to feel. I can't deal with this, not now, not after everything just started to look as if it was perfect."

"We can still make it perfect, Rach. It was a bit unfortunate the way this went, but this isn't a bad thing, is it? I mean… we're having a baby."

A sudden jolt of happiness almost knocked him over. He was going to be a father. This was definitely a good thing, regardless of how unexpectedly it happened. Rachel was burying her face in her hands again, shaking her head and he'd never felt that painfully helpless in his entire life. This was so new for him and without her guidance, with her being so lost and confused, he felt lost as well. He took a few steps in her direction and kneeled down beside her.

"You think we should get married?"

The sudden look of horror on her face was the opposite of how he would've expected her to react.

"Married, Joey? Do you think this is what I want? Do you think I got pregnant to get you to marry me?"

"No … of course not," he said hastily. "I would never think something like that. I just…" he paused for a while, trying to get his thoughts at least a little bit in order. Failing at that, he decided that it might be best to just tell her how he felt. "I think I'm just as confused as you are. But I love you, that's not gonna change."

She looked up at him and tried to smile through her tears. Touching his face tenderly she said, "I love you too, Joe."

Another bout of happiness coursed through him at her words, but just when he wanted to take her in his arms, when he started to tell her that everything was going to be fine, that he would always be there for her, she suddenly got up.

"I have to go to work."

"It's Sunday, Rachel," he stated bewildered.

His words didn't keep her from grabbing her jacket and heading for the door.

"I need to think, I have to get out of here for a while."

"Rach, it's getting dark outside, I can't let you wander around alone."

"Joey, please don't start to tell me what to do. I need to think and I can't do that here. Please, you know that."

The memory of the results of the last time she needed to think forced him to nod his head in reluctant consent. When the door shut behind her, something occurred to him. Something she might consider to do. His blood turned cold with indescribable terror. He sprinted to the door, ripped it open and bolted into the hallway.

Rachel was about to walk down the stairs and turned to him with a questioning look.

"Just… please… don't think about… not keeping her," Joey said breathlessly.

Her hand went to her belly in the universally known protective gesture of an expecting mother. "I would never do that."

Overwhelming relief washed through him at that and he couldn't have thought of a single thing that would've mattered more to him right at this moment. "That's all I need to know."

tbc