Joey was eying the contents of the table suspiciously. Catering at DOOL had surely seen better days. Or maybe his appetite wasn't what it used to be, which was a probable explanation too. He bent over the table to snatch the last blueberry muffin, cursing silently when Drake's stethoscope slipped from around his neck and landed on the table. The moment he put it around his neck again and took the first bite out off his muffin, his cell phone rang.
"Hello," he mumbled into the receiver around his mouthful of food.
"Hi, Joey, this is Ross…"
Joey froze and almost choked on his muffin. He hadn't talked to Ross in over three months. That Ross called him on his cell could only mean one thing.
"What's with Rachel?"
"I'm taking her to the hospital right now. I think she has something called Braxton-Hicks contractions. Carol had those, too, it's nothing serious, most women don't even notice them. But Rachel doesn't feel so good, so just to be sure…"
"Which hospital?"
"Joey, I don't think you need to come…"
"WHICH HOSPITAL?" Joey yelled into the phone and everyone around him flinched at hearing him raise his voice like that.
"St. Mary's is the closest one, but…"
Without listening to what Ross had to say, Joey ended the call and headed for the exit of the sound stage.
"Joey!", the director yelled after him. "Where do you think you're going?"
"My girlfriend is going to the hospital, I have to go."
"Joey, you can't go, we'll be going on shooting your scene in five minutes."
"Pete, we did nine takes of this scene already, where do you think we are here? At the set of the next Oscar winning movie?"
He didn't even hear anymore what Pete was yelling after him. He didn't care. All – or everyone – he cared about was on the way to St. Mary's hospital and he was hell bent on being there, too.
The ride in the cab seemed to take forever. It gave him plenty of time to worry about what might have happened to Rachel and to his daughter. It gave him more time than he would've cared about to feel horrible about the fact that it had been Ross of all people who was the one taking care of her right now.
Ross, not him. Again.
He asked himself if he had a choice. If it could be different, if he could be - should be - the one taking care of Rachel and the baby. The answer was surprisingly simple. Of course he should. It was his responsibility. His, not Ross's.
His stream of thoughts was interrupted by the cab coming to a screeching halt.
"Here we are, doctor," the cab driver announced with a proud smile, "in record time".
Only after he had paid the man and gotten out of the cab, Joey noticed why the driver had addressed him like that. He was still wearing his costume. Pushing that thought aside, he rushed into the emergency room and headed for the reception desk.
"I'm looking for Rachel Green. She's five months pregnant and had been brought here suspected of having Braxton-Hicks contractions."
The nurse behind the desk jumped into action at seeing him and looked into the chart in front of her and then back at him, studying the name tag on his coat.
"Miss Green is in room two, Dr. Ramoray," she told him hurriedly, "It's this way, behind the right corner."
He thanked her with a curt nod and ran towards the room. Rounding the corner he crashed into someone who was standing right in front of the elusive room number two.
"Sorry …" he started before he noticed that he had run into no one else but Ross.
Joey straightened his clothes and took a deep breath. He had to be civil. This was neither the right time nor the right place to get into a fight with Ross.
"How is she?" he managed to ask after clearing his throat for what felt like at least three times.
"I don't know. But I don't think you should worry."
"Don't tell me what to worry about," Joey replied gruffly. Ross went silent and took a step back, looking away from him.
'Great', Joey thought, angry at himself, 'So much for being civil.'
Since he wasn't even close to being able to say sorry to the man who was the very reason for this horrible situation, he had to think about something else to break the tension.
"Thanks for bringing her here, though."
Ross stole a quick glance at him and nodded slowly, acknowledging his attempt at a truce.
"No big deal, Joe."
Joey shook his head at this. Ross was wrong, it was a big deal. It should've been him, he was the father after all. Whatever that still meant.
A few moments later the door opened and a doctor came out, turning to Ross.
"You'll be relieved to hear that you were right about Miss Green's discomfort being Braxton-Hicks contractions. She's fine. You still did the right thing by bringing her in, you're gonna make a wonderful father."
With that the doctor patted Ross jovially on the shoulder, turned around and left the two men stunned in his wake.
Joey closed his eyes, defeated. 'Whatever that still means', his thought from before echoed in his brain. Obviously it meant nothing. Not if things stayed like they were now. Not if he wasn't there for her, not if he left it to Ross to take care of her. Being a father was much more than just getting a girl pregnant. Never in his whole life had that been so unmistakably clear to him.
"Joey, I'm so glad you're here," Rachel's voice made him open his eyes again. At least someone was acknowledging his presence.
"How you doin'?" he asked her with a smile and when she smiled back, the world around him started to fade into the background.
"I'm okay. The baby's okay. You know… me and pain. There is a little something going on in my stomach and I start to panic," she said, trying to sound as if it really hadn't been a big deal.
It did nothing to alleviate his unease about the incident at all. He lifted his hand and gingerly touched her cheek. "You sure you're okay, baby?"
Seeing her eyes go wide at his words made him re-examine what he had just said. He let his hand fall to his side again and shook his head sadly, trying to shake off the ghosts from the past.
"I'm fine, Joey, really," Rachel hurriedly answered. Then, in an attempt to lighten the mood, she tapped the nameplate on his coat and said, "Or should I call you Dr. Ramoray?"
"It's Drake for you," he answered, smiling again.
Judging from the look on her face, the dreamy and slightly sad smile, she remembered the occasion when he first had said that to her.
(Flashback to day 48)
Joey was on the way from the sound stage to his dressing room, deep in thought because he couldn't make sense of the fact that Christian Saunders of all people had talked the director into calling it a day.
Although he was glad he had.
The thought that he was going to see Rachel in about half an hour sent a warm wave of happiness through him and a wide smile spread over his face. He never would've believed this. He saw Rachel every day, he had known her for years, they made love almost every night, and yet he couldn't seem to get enough of her. Being with her was like a drug, like an obsession, and it got worse with every day they were together. He mused that the comparison with being on drugs was quite fitting. It felt a bit like a constant intoxication, like a constant high. Not that he was complaining.
Still smiling he stepped into his dressing room and locked the door behind him. When he turned around, he noticed that someone was sitting in his armchair. It was Rachel, wearing one of his shirts and from what he could tell, not much else. She was here. He didn't even need to wait thirty minutes, she was right here – with him.
"Look who's in my dressing room. Security around here isn't what it used to be," he said smiling, taking a step into her direction.
Rachel stood up and put her arms around his neck. "I had a bit of insider help. It's a good thing I'm friends with Chris."
Joey chuckled at the realization why exactly Chris had tried to get him to leave the set. He made a mental note to thank him the next day.
"It's been a while since the last time I had a groupie in my dressing room, so… what do we do now?" he asked while placing light kisses around her ear.
"Well, excuse me, Mr. Tribbiani, but I actually came to see Dr. Ramoray."
He pulled back a little, looking at her quizzically. At seeing her mischievous smile he decided to play along.
"It's Drake to you," he said in his best 'Dr. Ramoray' voice.
"Well, Drake… I hope what I'm gonna tell you falls under doctor patient confidentiality."
"Of course it does. What's the problem?"
Rachel stepped back a bit and slowly started to unbutton the shirt she was wearing. "I think it's something with my heart. Sometimes it starts to beat really fast and I can barely breathe and my stomach feels as if butterflies are in it."
She shrugged out of the shirt, revealing her gorgeous body, clad in some very sexy light blue lingerie. Looking like the picture of innocence, she let her hands roam over her chest and down her belly.
"And I don't even wanna tell you what happens further south," she crooned sexily.
Joey swallowed a few times to get himself back under control.
"Does it…" he squeaked and tried again, "Does it happen all the time or just… on specific occasions?"
"Well … there is this man I'm going out with – my boyfriend – and it only happens when I'm thinking about him or… when I'm with him."
Joey could barely hide his delight at hearing her say that, it got to him every time. Still, he tried to put on a straight face and went back to being who she obviously wanted him to be.
"I see. This is a very serious condition you have here. I'm afraid… you're in love."
"You think?" Rachel gasped as if being shocked.
"It appears to be the case. And since love is a very infectious disease, I'm pretty sure that boyfriend of yours has it too. In fact, I know he has."
Rachel stepped close to him again, looking deeply into his eyes.
"Do you know what I can do about that, Drake?"
He took her into his arms and started kissing her neck. "There is nothing you can do against it," he said between kisses. "But you can do… someone."
Rachel moaned quietly but when he moved in to kiss her on her mouth, she pulled back a little. "Can you stop being Drake now? It feels like I'm cheating on my boyfriend," she smiled.
"I was going to get out of these clothes anyway," he said while getting rid of his coat, taking off his shirt too while he was at it.
"Hi Rachel," he whispered after he turned back to her.
"Hi Joey," she smiled back. "I'm so glad to see you."
"Right back at ya," he murmured while lightly tracing the outline of her bra with his index finger. "I've missed you. I know it has only been a few hours but…"
The rest of his sentence was cut short by Rachel pressing a fervent and demanding kiss on his lips. He figured they were done talking now and kissed her back, showing her what he had intended to say.
A while later they lay on the couch, Rachel's head resting on his chest, and he was letting his hand roam over her naked body. It was one of the many things he found himself doing with her that he had never done with any other woman. He had never felt the need to touch a woman after having sex. It had always felt as if there was no need for that.
"I love it when you touch me like that," Rachel whispered as if she had read his thoughts.
"Which is a good thing, because I wouldn't know how to stop."
"Then don't. I can't imagine how I could ever exist without you touching me. If you ever stop touching me, I guess I would just wither away and die, like a flower without water."
He snickered at that. "Sounds like right out of one of those books you're hiding under your bed."
Rachel chuckled. "Yeah, it is," she half whispered, half sighed and snuggled even closer to him.
Feeling the same notion, Joey drew her closer with one arm, his fingertips still restlessly roaming her skin. It occurred to him that he somehow liked the thought of being so important to her, of her needing him that much.
"Is it true, though?" he asked a little bashfully.
Her answer came without hesitation in form of a content sigh.
"It is."
(End flashback)
Usually, when he remembered the blissful happiness they had lived in for those seven weeks, an unbearable sense of loss threatened to overwhelm him. But being able to look into her eyes, to see that those memories still meant something to her, too, made him happy somehow. Maybe it was hope that flickered up inside him at that, hope that like Monica had said, things weren't completely lost.
They were standing so close already, their bodies almost touched. He barely needed to move his hand at all to be able to grasp hers and gently caress the back of her hand with his thumb. Rachel closed her eyes for a second and when she looked back, hope was shining out of her eyes, too.
"It's still true, Joey," she whispered softly.
He kept staring at her until a voice from somewhere reached his ear.
"Hey uh, can I… uh… can I talk to you guys for a second?" Ross asked haltingly.
"What's up, Ross?" Rachel asked, sounding slightly irritated.
Ross gestured for them to sit down and they both did. Joey felt a hint of unease about what Ross was going to say, and a lot more than a hint of irritation at the interruption of… what had happened between them. Although he wasn't even sure what that had been.
"I want to talk about our situation," Ross started, shuffling his feet. "Well, the thing is... 'cause I live with Rachel I'm here for a lot of the baby stuff, okay?"
Both Rachel and Joey nodded mutely at that obvious observation.
"And Joey... Joey is missing everything."
Again, the truth of that statement was undeniable. Although Joey started to wonder where Ross was going with this. He hoped he didn't just say that to rub in what kind of a terrible father he was going to be.
"Maybe you two should try to live together again," Ross said finally, and judging by the look on his face, he expected them to say something to this.
Joey couldn't. It wasn't like he hadn't thought about that countless times, but it felt useless to think about it as long as he didn't know what Rachel's opinion was about moving in with him again.
"Are you asking me to move out?" he heard her asking, which confirmed his suspicions. She didn't want to move out of Ross's apartment.
"Oh no, no I love living with you. It just seems that... if you're gonna have a roommate, you know, it might as well be the father."
Joey couldn't help but look at Ross in surprise.
"I would love to live with you again, Joey," Rachel said quietly, turning back to him, the hope in her eyes even more palpable than before. "Having you around for everything. And we… we can just try it, like, on a temporary basis."
"But Rachel, it's you and me," he tried to remind her. Not so much because that would be a problem for him, but because he thought it might be one for her. There were a lot of unresolved issues between them and living together was a sure way to bring them up all the time.
"I know but it… it wouldn't be anything romantic. At least not if you don't want it to be."
There it was again, this non-commitment of hers that left him wondering how much their 'romance' had ever meant to her.
"All right now, so …What do you think?"
Ross's question cut his thought process short. But he still didn't know what to think because he didn't know what Rachel thought. What her reasons were for wanting to live with him besides having the father of the baby around. If what he had felt before, if what he thought he had seen in her eyes, was really there.
"Ross, can you give us a minute? I need to talk to Rachel alone, okay?" he finally managed and Ross nodded.
"Yeah, sure. I'll be out there trying to get us a cab."
Ross was barely out of earshot when Rachel turned to him, suddenly visibly upset.
"Joey, I swear I didn't tell him to do that, I had no idea he would suggest that. And if you don't want to, just tell me, okay? I don't expect… anything."
The thought that she could've planned something like this with Ross made him smile for some reason. It was almost flattering to imagine her coming up with such an intricate plan just to get to live with him again, where she just could've asked.
"I know you didn't know, I could tell by the noise your jaw made when it hit the floor."
His remark was intended to put her at ease, to make her smile again, but she was still looking pensive.
"If you need time to think about it…" she said quietly.
"Rach, I know I want to live with you, I know I want to be around for you and the baby. I really want to feel like I'm gonna be a father, not just like my ex-girlfriend is gonna have a baby."
That finally made her lips curl just a little in the tiniest of smiles.
"So you wanna try?"
"I wanna try living with you again…" he confirmed and decided that now was probably as good a moment as any to ask what he had meant to from the moment he had sent Ross away. "But… what about… what you said before, that it's still true?"
Rachel didn't seem to need time to think about this.
"It is. But you make the rules. If you want it to be nothing romantic, it won't be. We're gonna be just friends, just roommates. I promise."
It occurred to him that there was probably no way to get her to say what he wanted to hear without him telling her that it actually was what he wanted to hear. But for some reason, he couldn't bring himself to ask. After everything that had happened, asking her if she still wanted it to be something romantic suddenly seemed stupid. In a way, he knew she did. In a way, he knew that it was him who had to make the first move.
He took a deep breath and settled for, "So when do you think you can move in?"
Excitement suddenly clearly shone out of her eyes, but for some reason she fought it down.
"Tomorrow?" she finally asked tentatively. "I mean, if that's all right with you."
Now it was him who had to try to keep the excitement that suddenly bubbled up inside of him out of his voice when he gave back "Yeah, tomorrow would be great."
tbc
Please tell me what you think.