Chapter 2: Memories Hurt

Noin stretched as the light came on in her room to awaken her for the day ahead. It was 0500 and no matter how long she awoke at that time she always felt that it was damn early. She changed quickly into her uniform and rushed out to the morning meeting that started at 0515 sharp. On her way down the hall she met up with Zechs and she chatted a bit with him about the next couple of missions and some of the problems that they ran into and some of the successes. He was always easy to converse with even though he was unnaturally quiet this morning. She was worried that he was pulling away from her and she knew that she couldn't lose him again, not like when she thought he might be dead. It was all too painful a time for her so she was trying to not be too forward or pushy to make him change positively. Now she wasn't so sure about being laid back with him. No changes had been made in the way she had been hoping for. She loved him deeply. She had loved him since that evening in the library at Lake Victoria academy.

They arrived at 0505 and took their seats around a small steel oval meeting table. She reclined and glanced at Zechs. He was nursing a cup of coffee that he had grabbed on the way in and he had a far of gaze. Sighing quietly she closed her eyes and lost herself in her memories…

((Noin couldn't keep from smiling since the night in the library. The man known as Zechs Merquise, the mysterious man, was now one of her closest friends and greatest competition. She had always made sure that she never beat him but always remained a very close second. She liked to place him on top of a pedestal, she knew somehow that he was meant for great things. They battled each other everyday and enjoyed each other's company every day off and evening. He seemed to bring out the best in her and she liked how his presence made her feel. It had been a great 2 years over all at the school and the final tests were coming up for graduation. After graduation they would move to their respective bases and on with their lives. Her heart sank with that thought as she dressed for their pre-graduation ball. She knew that it was right that they part ways, they were nothing more than friends after all and good friends would never truly lose contact. She gazed at the woman standing before her in the mirror and sighed; she never felt comfortable in dresses or gowns. This slinky black number she was wearing clung to every curve. The neckline plunged deeply to her navel and the back was just as deep. She cussed under her breath, how could I let April talk me into this one? She touched her face lightly looking at the makeup her friend, April, and applied for her. It was too much she knew it had to be too much. He'll laugh, she thought to herself. Her eyes drifted to the wall clock and the 1900 flashed at her, "Oh crap! Late!" She ran out grabbing her light purple shawl and matching purse.

She arrived about five minutes late and the dancing had already gotten underway. The music was drifting through the air like a beautiful dove and it encompassed Noin with a wonderful feeling of excitement and joy. She glanced around the room and saw him immediately, the mask was always hard to miss. He saw her too and even though the mask covered most of his expression she could tell that he was stunned with her appearance. They moved toward each other and met in the middle of the dance floor. He gently took her arm and led her over to the closest balcony. Looking her up and down he blew out a breath, "Wow, Noin, you look beautiful."

She liked his blunt honesty, "Thank you. You look nice too." She looked down at her satin gown and her hands played at the material, "I feel a little out of my element." She looked up at him and smiled.

He hid the sharp inhale that followed the look that she gave him then, she was beautiful, intoxicating, especially in the moonlight. She noticed his hand hovering right above hers not daring to touch it and she tried to ignore the feeling that it gave her. His voice brought her out of her bliss, "So what are your plans after graduation?"

She fidgeted and inhaled deeply, that's right he's leaving, I'm leaving, this is going to be the end of it all, of us. She cursed in her head, silly Noin you never have been his, he has never been yours, get over it and enjoy the evening with him. She looked at him and smiled, "I actually was thinking about staying here and teaching. I think that I would be a good teacher."

He looked away and stared up at the stars, "I know what you did, Noin. How you always made sure that you came in second not matter what we did…why?" His gaze came back to her, "I think that you would be a good teacher but you could choose any base you want, you're an excellent fighter, why didn't you try to beat me, you could have come first, maybe even in all of the classes and tests."

She moved awkwardly toward the balcony railing, "I wanted you to have all the choices, you are and always have been better than me." She saw him try to speak and she started again, "Please, let me finish. I don't want war, or fighting. I did all this because I love space, it's so beautiful. I want to go there someday and I know that by teaching I might just get there." She smiled and he joined her leaning on the railing.

"Very well then." He smiled.

"Anyway…" she looked at him, "I was already offered a job here at the academy and I took it."

He happily smacked her on the back, "Congratulations! That's great, Noin!"

She smiled back and her eyes drifted to the dancers, "So everything is turning out the way that it should."

He watched her watch the dancing, "So it seems…Noin?" She turned her long neck toward him with a "yes?" on her lips. "I'm not too good at it, but would you like to dance?" He offered his hand to her.

"With pleasure!" She took his hand and he led her out onto the dance floor.

He had lied he was a very good dancer. He led her around with ease twirling and dipping her, waltzing gracefully to the beat. She felt dizzy, but it was wonderful. His hand was on her waist his other in her hand. He held her firmly and tenderly and she wished that the music would never end.

As they night ended they were both feeling good, each having a good share of food and wine, a little champagne here and there. They had had a great time. He was walking her back to her room and she was watching the stars pass overhead and feeling as if she were in a dream. "This is me…" she spoke quietly as they stopped outside her door.

He laughed a little, he knew it was her room. He moved his arm around her to press the button for the door and she turned at the same time to face him to say something leaving their faces just inches from each other. His hand missed the button and rested against the wall and the other moved to the other side of her encircling her. She was breathing deeply and she could feel his warmth. He looked into her eyes, and for the first time he didn't like his mask. Like she read his mind her small hands moved up to the mask and gently lifted it from his head. The face that met her gaze was beautiful and noble, she had seen it before. She suddenly knew why he had hid his identity all this time. He was the prince of the Peacecraft family, a family that believed in true pacifism. No wonder…attending the academy, becoming a soldier, it is against his family's beliefs.

His eyes were so blue, like ice, yet there was warmth behind them. Those handsome eyes watched her face now for her reaction, but she just smiled. He had a serious look on his face like he was fighting something, burying something deep down inside. Her body was responding to his and she long to touch this man that she finally realized she loved. As she moved toward him he didn't back away. She touched her lips to his lightly and he responding just as lightly. Noin had always known that she had had a forward side but now she was surprising herself with how forward she was being. Before she could think she had reached behind herself and pressed the button to her door. Her hands grabbed his coat collar and pulled him into her room. His mask fell to the ground with a clank and she deepened her kiss. The door slid closed and the silence was filled with the sound of her kisses and the sound of his response. Part of her wanted to stop it, knowing that they were both worse for wear with wine, but her body wanted more. She was no stranger to the love of a man, in school before academy she had had a serious relationship that her family had broken up. Zechs was different. He was enjoying this contact with her but she was sensing something in him, something that was making her think that he was letting her do this for her and not for them. He pulled back and her worst fear came out of his mouth, "We need to stop." He said out of breath.

She knew that it wasn't him not being attracted to her, his body's response to their passionate kisses had told her differently, but somehow she knew he was right, but why? "I'm sorry, Zechs, I was just overcome with the thought of losing you tomorrow." She looked at him, still in his arms, her eyes started to tear, "You're my closest friend, I…I'm going to miss you so…" she began to choke up and couldn't finish.

He held her close, "It…it's not because…because you are…I just don't think that sex is going to take away the pain…" She stared at him, he continued, "You have been the most precious person to me these past two years, but I've changed from the boy you met, I am tortured day and night about my roots and how I am mocking them with my presence here." She tried to cradle his face with her hand but he moved away from her, "Do you know why I came here, Noin? Do you!" he was becoming more and more emotional, hurt and pain was rushing out of him. She tried to move toward him but he turned away, "I came so that I could take revenge for my family's destruction."

"I guessed as much when I saw who you were, but let me be your friend through this…please I care about you so much…" She grasped him from behind and held him close.

He relaxed into her, "It won't be over, it will never be over." His body shook with the silent tears, he held back, "I need to go…" He pulled away from her and quickly picked up and replaced the mask on his head. She tried to say something but he was gone before she could.

She flopped onto her bed hugging her legs close to her, crying silently.))

The voice of Kent brought her back from her memories and she looked at Zechs, I didn't speak to you again until you came to Lake Victoria Academy a year and a half later, Oh Zechs, I never stopped loving you, and God help me I never will. She tried to shake the memory as the meeting began. This was going to be a long day.