A/N: I don't own Instant Star. Reviews are always welcome.

Episode 15 – Picture Perfect

Part 1

Jude had been making regular visits to Shay while he was in rehab unbeknownst to Tommy or anyone else for that matter. She didn't think Tommy would understand; she didn't understand herself. What pained her the most was having to lie to Tommy about it and the guilt. She couldn't explain it, but he was the only one she could talk to about the car accident and the nightmares she was having.

"Hey, shorty," Shay said embracing Jude. "You keep this up and I'll be forced to think you've forgiven me" he said with a hopeful air. "Not even close, Shay" I said. "Well, you can't fault a guy for trying," he said. "How's the ball and chain?" he asked knowing perfectly well that my relationship with Tommy was everything I had hoped it would be. "Perfect" I said. "How's the whole not drinking, thing" I asked. "Going better now that I have your visits to look forward to," he says smiling. "How can you say that when I was the reason you drank so much," I said. Shay recoiled from my words and sat down. "It's true isn't it?" I asked. "You were never one to let a guy easy" he said. "Jude, when you got married it was like all my hopes and dreams of what we could have had died" he said quietly. I guess drinking just numbed it a little, but the pain was always there" he said. "Shay you know I love you like a…" I said. "Don't even say it Jude," he said. "It was my fault to begin with cheating on you and then spending all that time together during the tour you make it hard not to fall in love with you" he said. "Shay, maybe it's not a good idea for me to continue visiting if that's how you feel," I said. "No, seeing you reminds me of that person I became and I never want to be him again," he said. "Okay, then I'll see you next week same time same place," I said giving him a hug.

Part 2

Portia always made it a point of waiting twenty minutes after Jude's visit to see Shay. "Hey, aunt Portia," Shay says. "Hey Shay Shay," she said. "I can't keep lying to Jude," he said. "It's killing me," he went on. "Shay you promised me you wouldn't say anything," she said. "If Jude ever found out she would be devastated," she said. "You've got to tell her, though, you're her friend" he said. "Even friendships have their limits on forgiveness and I don't think ours would survive this" she said. Jude and Portia had grown closer since she came out of her coma and her family had moved on without her. Next to E.J. and Georgia who were getting more and more busy and were unable to spend as much time with her as they would have liked, Portia had become like an older sister and confidant. They had lunches and dinners together and would go shopping every so often.

Part 3

Jude made her way to the studio and was looking for Tommy. "Hey, girl," he said. "Hey yourself," I said giving him a kiss. "Wow, would you two get a room," Kwest said. "Fine, then" we said and made our way to the office. "God, I missed you," he said leaning into me for another kiss. "Tommy, I saw you two hours ago," I said teasingly. "I'm going through withdrawal" he said pathetically planting another kiss on me. "Jude, I've got to get back to work, but I'll see you later okay," he said before another quick peck as he headed out the door.

Part 4

(A few days later) "Hey Jude I think your guitar case is gathering dust," Tommy said jokingly. "I haven't seen you pick it up once, since you got back," he said. "Is everything alright," he said. "Oh yeah, I'm just still getting settled and everything" I said lying. "Jude you're the worst liar," he said. "Jude you know you can talk to me about anything, no judgments" he said. "Yeah, but you've got nothing to worry about," I said with a fake smile. "Okay" he said giving me a much needed hug.

Part 5

I sat a few feet from my guitar and couldn't bring myself to pick it up. "What is up with me," I thought. Then the nagging doubts started creeping in. "What if what I had before the accident is gone," I thought mournfully. "3 years is a long time, what if I've forgotten how," I thought. These thoughts kept buzzing around in my head when I decided to up and leave the studio citing a headache and missing my visit with Shay.

Part 6

"Hey, I didn't see Jude," Portia said to Shay. "That makes two of us," he said glumly. "Do you think she suspects anything," she asked. "I've kept my promise, so you can relax," he said. "You've got dinner with her and Tom this week why don't you tell her then I mean it's not like you and Tommy made an agree to keep this in the dl, right?" Shay said. Portia's silence only admitted the truth. "It was his idea wasn't it; Quincy always keeping secrets with Jude," he said with disgust. "It was my idea, Shay" Portia said. "Yeah, but he agreed" Shay said. "Jude's had her share of betrayals she doesn't need any more in her life," Shay said. "You've got to tell her," he said. "And what will that accomplish, but heart ache and a huge mess," she said. "Then, you'd better find a way to clean up your mess" he said. "Don't see me until you do," he said. "Shay you're not…" she said. "I am" he said. "I won't do this to Jude, anymore" he said.

Part 7

Jude, Portia, and Tommy were sitting in the dining room finishing dinner when Portia went into the kitchen to help Tommy bring out dessert. "I'm telling her tonight," she said in a whisper. "What" he said. "Tommy it's been long enough," she said as she made her way back in to the dining room. Jude was enthusiastically eating her tiramisu when she noticed Portia and Tommy playing with their food with their fork. "Are you too alright, you both look like someone ran over your dog," I said jokingly. When neither responded I asked Portia, "Seriously guys what's up?" "Jude, while you were in a coma the doctor told me that there wasn't much hope for you ever coming out of it," Tommy said. "And Shay had just checked himself out of rehab early for the second time and disappeared," continued Portia. "I came over here to see Tommy who was on his second bottle of wine" Portia said. "We finished the second bottle and opened up a third and then a fourth," Tommy said. "And we slept together," Portia said guiltily. I didn't realize how hard I was gripping my wine glass when its shattering broke the silence. "Jude, you're hurt," Tommy said grabbing a napkin and pressing it to my hand. "Jude, I'm so sorry," Portia said. I slapped her across the face as hard as I could and saw that her lip was bleeding. "I guess I deserved that," she said. "I'll just go, then," she said. "Don't bother" I said running out of the kitchen and into my car.

Part 8

I got out of my car and the people at the rehab place let me in even though it was after hours because I was a regular visitor. I ran to Shay's room and buried my head in his chest. "Hey, shorty what's wrong," he said wiping away a tear from my face. So I told him about dinner. And he didn't seem shocked. I slowly backed away from him. "You knew about this didn't you" I said accusingly. "Tell me you didn't know," I said with tears streaming down my face. "I saw you every week and you kept this from me," I said in a small voice. I didn't hold back and punched Shay in the face as hard as I could and got out of there as fast as I could.

Part 9

I wanted to disappear, so I did. I bought a one-way bus ticket from Toronto to New York. I checked into a small hotel by Times Square and had just finished taking a shower. I wiped the steam off the mirror looking at my newly blonde locks. I put on some jeans and an old Ramones t-shirt and headed out the door.