Tainted Love

Sometimes I feel I've got to

Run away I've got to

Get away

From the pain that you drive into the heart of me

Hermione ran down the seemingly endless hallway. Her footsteps echoed each time they came in contact with the unforgiving stone. She turned a corner and skidded to a stop, sliding down the wall and sitting on the cold floor. Her breaths came in short, painful gasps as she tried to regulate her breathing; tears flowed freely down her face. She watched as they fell onto the stone floor, leaving small oval stains. It wasn't supposed to be like this. It was never supposed to be like this. The pain was unbearable. Destroying her heart and soul slowly. Almost sadistically. She had to get away. She didn't know where, hell she didn't care where, as long as it was away from that prat. She pulled herself up the wall and took off running yet again. She didn't care that she was getting weird looks by the many students returning to their respective common rooms for the night. Nor did she care that the halls filled with whispers and gossip as soon as she had bolted out the castle doors. All she cared about was going somewhere to be alone.

The love we share

Seems to go nowhere

I've lost my lights

I toss and turn I can't sleep at night.

Once she was outside, she started to run towards the lake. She sat under the same giant tree that Ron and her had sat when he had first asked her to be his girlfriend. The memory sent a new wave of grief over her and she suddenly became cold even though it was the middle of May and the air was pleasantly warm on her skin. She couldn't believe what she had just seen. How could he have betrayed her in such a cruel way? He had paraded it in the middle of the common room, where he knew she would be sure to see. She new that things hadn't been great between them for a while now, but she never would have expected he'd do this. "Stupid girl, Stupid, gullible Hermione." Her thoughts taunted her. Ron and her had been an item for a while now and everyone thought it was just great they were together, but three months into their relationship, things had gotten messy. Ron spent less and less time with her, blaming her Head duties on their lack of personal time rather than his weaning interest in her. She had asked him once why he didn't just break it off with her if he didn't love her anymore and that had resulted in a shouting match and ended in Ron apologizing and declaring his love for her. So, they had kept it together and things seemed normal again, until two weeks ago, when she had told Ron that she felt they were better friends than an item. It was the first time he had hit her. He had smacked her across her face with his bare palm, so hard it had left an ugly red handprint on her creamy skin. It hadn't taken long before she was covered in bruises, which she hid constantly with multiple concealing charms.

Once I ran to you (I ran)

Now I'll run from you

She had loved him, trusted him and he had hurt her, but she still felt for him deep inside and that was why she had been so devastated when she had walked into the common room that evening and seen Ron passionately kissing a pretty blonde sixth year girl. She had run and she had ended up at the lake with memories of Ron swimming through her mind, flooding her senses, making her blind to reality.

This tainted love you've given

I give you all a girl could give you

Take my tears and that's not nearly all

Tainted love

He had said he loved her countless times, had he ever really meant it? He was sweet and caring when they were among friends, but he was hurtful and violent when they were alone. Maybe in the beginning he had meant every loving word that left his mouth, but something had changed in him. Maybe he stopped loving her on that emotional level and that was why he had stopped spending free time with her. Maybe somewhere down the line she had become his 'trophy girl' and his attraction to her was purely physical. She was pretty, with great curves and soft brown curls that fell and rested gracefully on her shoulders. Maybe that was all she could offer him or maybe she could offer a lot more and he simply refused to take their relationship to that level, preferring the current state of control he had over her. Maybe she had felt that he needed her more than she needed him and that was why she didn't leave when he condescended her or beat her. She knew this had to stop. She couldn't go back to him. She didn't love him and he would never let her go. To him, she was his property. There was only one way to get away permently. If she didn't do it he eventually would. If not now, then in the near future. Their relationship was toxic and now it was tainted. He had cheated on her and he wouldn't stop that, but he wouldn't break up with her either. No, he would keep going out with her, marry her even if she let it happen, and he would cheat on her behind closed doors.

Now I know I've got to

Run away I've got to

Get away

From the pain that you drive into the heart of me

There was only one way to escape this hell that had become her life. "It's better this way, It's the only way to escape, He can't hurt you anymore this way, If not you than him" Her conscience reasoned with her as her right hand gripped the wand in her cloak pocket. Fresh tears stained her pale cheeks as she raised her wand and pointed it at herself. If she didn't end it, he surely would. She choked out a hollow laugh as she thought of the irony of the situation. All her life she had wanted to love and be loved in return and even though Ron didn't love her anymore, hurt her emotionally and physically, her flame of love for him still burned inside of her. She didn't think she would ever end up like this, sitting under a tree by the black lake at a quarter to midnight with her wand pointed at her already broken heart. Broken by her best friend and the only man that she loved no matter how he hurt her. She parted her chapped lips and blinked her puffy red eyes, trying to steady herself. Her mouth felt like sandpaper and her hand quivered slightly as she whispered the two dreaded words that would end this tainted love forever.

"Avada Kedavra"

Take my tears and that's not nearly all

Tainted love

Tainted love FIN