Chapter Twenty: Lines Drawn and Crossed
Shinobu got up early as she always did. She donned her kitchen clothing—she wouldn't dress for school until her work was done—and headed downstairs to prepare breakfast. The usual routine was she'd start the the fire and then the kettle for a small pot of tea, and prepare ingredients for breakfast while waiting for it to boil. She'd then wake up more fully with a cup of tea and then prepare the meal. Usually Mutsumi would show up with the tea in time to serve everyone.
It was a nice, comfortable, regular routine that had only varied by the contributions of new residents since she came to Hinata House.
So, she was taken aback by the havoc wreaked on her little realm when she opened the door to a flurry of motion, noise, and an olfactory assault from spices and other things: some unfamiliar to her, some having no right to be combined: Sesame oil, doenjang (fermented bean paste), soy sauce, salt, garlic, ginger, pepper flakes, gochujang (fermented red chili paste), and cabbage. Not to mention that omnipresent Kimchi. Auuu! The kitchen's going to smell of that for weeks, she growled internally.
"Come on in, Shinobu!" Naru said in English. "Hyun-Sil is making a full Korean breakfast."
"Ah," Shinobu said, choking off any vocal protests about this invasion of her domain. Whatever she personally preferred, Naru was the Okami of Hinata House and had the final say (Keitaro was unlikely to overrule her) over who had access. "H- how can I help, Mrs. Park?"
"Please do not worry, Miss Maehara. I have it in hand," Hyun-Sil said cheerfully. She does all the cooking, so she should appreciate the chance to rest.
So, Shinobu sat next to Naru and evaluated the scene. Naru's friend was obviously skilled in the kitchen. But...! Some of the ingredients were the same... the rice, seaweed, a salad, soup... but they were done wrong! Prepared differently! Where was the natto? The tsukemono? Why was the fish stewed instead of grilled? Why was she serving katsu for breakfast when it was supposed to be for evening meals? And, to top it off, the green tea looked different. Taking a tentative sip from what Naru poured her, it definitely had a different flavor.
I can endure, she told herself, resignedly. Still, she thought, does this mean my cooking isn't as well liked as I thought?
"Are you all right?" Naru said softly to Shinobu. She hoped Shinobu's expression wasn't a sign of coming trouble.
Shinobu gave a start, not realizing her discomfort was visible. "Ah, well... I guess I'm not sure what to do with myself when I'm outside of my routine?"
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Shinobu's mood was not improved by the others attitudes at breakfast. They were intrigued by Korean cuisine and enthusiastically took part. Only Kitsune showed caution with what was served, wanting to avoid whatever was served fermented or cooked with alcohol.
She had to admit that what Hyun-Sil prepared—excepting the kimchi—was good. But seeing the enthusiasm that she seldom saw for her own work directed towards this, reinforced her insecurity.
Adding insult to injury, since she hadn't prepared the meal, Haruka selected her as part of the cleanup crew, which meant she had to scramble to get dressed for school.
As everyone headed for the streetcar stop, Naru called out in Japanese, "Don't forget that if you didn't turn it in already, the rent should be turned in before Friday."
Shinobu, knowing that while Naru spoke generally, this time, she was the one in arrears, felt a little guilty. Usually, she always turned it in the first day it was due. But yesterday evening, her study session with Takane had turned more amorous than intended, and they had barely managed to stop short of B... well, barely... mostly... almost...? she amended contritely, blushing at the memory. Fact was, back in the old days before they were married, Naru would have flattened Keitaro if she had found him accidentally falling into the position.
The two had apologized to each other for their own behavior in the incident and agreed that they should consider her room and his apartment out of bounds for places to hang out because the risk of temptation went up when there was no risk of being discovered. But what sat on Shinobu's conscience was that, even though the more experienced women of Hinata House would have found their antics tame, the two of them had found it hard to want to stop what they had been doing.
"It's in my room," she said shamefacedly. "But I'll be late if I go back now. I'll get it to you this evening," Shinobu said apologetically... and hoping that Naru would attach that to the reason for her blush.
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Kitsune used her good arm to pull the "Open" sign towards its place. The itching under the plaster under her nose reminded her of her appointment this afternoon. A month after the accident, the doctor would determine if her broken nose was healed. Unfortunately, her arm had to remain in a cast until the end of March and some items were bulky enough to be difficult to handle with only one. Ordinarily, Haruka would help while Nagumo was at school. But today, she was picking Seta up from the airport.
"Can I give help with this?" a woman's voice asked in accented English.
Kitsune looked up to see Hyun-Sil approaching. Her expression said her question was just a courtesy for what she was planning to do anyway.
"Ah, sure... thank you," Kitsune replied. Her English was rusty but at least it was better than her barely existent Korean.
Having two functional arms, Hyun-Sil was able to easily put the sign in place. "You are the one they call 'Mitsune Konno,' correct?"
"Well, you can call me 'Kitsune,' Mrs. Park. Everyone else does."
"Well, you can call me Eonni if you want, Kitsune-yah."
Kitsune nodded, digesting the term. If she understood it rightly, Koreans used titles where the Japanese might tack on. -san to the name. "Eonni? What is that?"
Hyun-Sil smiled. "It means big sister."
"Oh!" Currently being the third oldest woman at Hinata House (Hyun-Sil having overtaken Haruka as the eldest), Kitsune liked the thought of being treated as younger. But a thought struck her. "Uh... ya know, I'm only a couple years older than Naru-chan and she calls you Eomeoni?"
Hyun-Sil nodded. "That's right. When I met her, she clearly needed an Eomeoni. You seem to need an Eonni. Anyway, years aren't the only thing that ages you. I can tell you have aged a lot the hard way."
"Yeah, well... if bad choices ages people along the way, I'm ready to draw Jyukkyu Kisoku," she said ruefully. "But I ask 'cause I can be pretty boorish in Japan. I can only imagine how I might come across ta ya and I don't wanna be rude."
In Seoul, you might not be that unusual once you got the forms of address right. "Well, it's better being informal than being seen as something scary, right? That younger girl, who cooked dinner last night, she probably would fall over if I said 'Boo!' to her."
Kitsune smiled, remembering how Shinobu reacted to that Russian friend of Keitaro. "Shinobu? Yeah, she tends ta be uncomfortable in unfamiliar situations. I'm guessing once she figures how you fit in, she'll start to relax around you."
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"I just can't relax around her!" Shinobu complained to Takane as they sat on their usual bench.
Meeting this morning had begun a little bit awkwardly because of the night before. Both had agreed last night that they needed to practice self control and this morning, but both felt that need to be a little onerous.
This morning, he had brought her a single red rose with a white lily which Shinobu—knowing the symbolic meaning of both combined through the books she read—found the gesture of love and purity touching. Maybe someday, we'll be ready for a red lily...
So, having gotten through that tense awkwardness, Shinobu vented a bit about the physical and olfactory assaults on her kitchen.
"It sounds difficult," Takane said cautiously. He had learned that Shinobu sometimes needed to vent and was looking for a sympathetic ear, not help in 'fixing' the problems. That realization had led to avoiding arguments… especially when he didn't really see the problem as a problem. "I imagine it will be hard to just wait until she leaves to get back to normal?"
Shinobu sighed. "When you look at it that way, I guess I do sound like I'm throwing a tantrum. I mean I know I won't be living there forever." She had some hopes about where she might wind up, enkindled since she'd received Nyamo's letter about Emori's proposal. But she knew it was way too early for Takane to pop that question yet. "Maybe I'm a control freak… I hope I'm not a racist."
Well, I feel like I'm tapdancing in a minefield, Takane thought. "I don't think you are either of those." Personally, he thought of Shinobu as an even-tempered phlegmatic temperament who sometimes got upset. "If I understand you rightly from our time together, I think having the kitchen organized is important to you and you see this Mrs. Park as disrupting that?"
Shinobu pondered that. "Yes… I'll have to see how much she cleans up after cooking to be fair, I guess." She was still mildly rankled over having been thrown on cleanup detail. Hyun-Sil had wanted to help, but Naru had been mortified at the thought of a guest doing these things. "Still, it would be easier to deal with if she would just act like a guest instead of like she's replacing me. And while I guess Korean cooking is okay, it's not my favorite."
"Of course, if her being here means that she wants to cook, maybe you and I could go out to dinner tonight and get your favorite?" He smiled at her.
"I'd like that," Shinobu said, smiling in return. It was Friday after all.
Their kiss was a bit more passionate than appropriate for their location, But, Shinobu thought, at least we're not risking temptation behind closed doors…
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"So, Motoko," Yuto said, with a smile, "perhaps you'd like to have dinner with me tonight at the hotel." He placed his hand over hers.
Motoko looked down at his hand. She was interested in him, and found him handsome, but some of what he did seemed to be moving kind of fast for her tastes. Why dinner at a hotel? for example. Are my instincts right? Or am I just overreacting and still having issues over walking in on my Ane-ue and her future husband that day? Still, today was a day she couldn't stay out late anyway. "I need to be home this evening so I can translate for a guest, so whatever we do has to take that into account."
She couldn't quite read his expression—it seemed like a cross between calculating and being annoyed.
"Well, if you think that is the most productive use of your time," he said coolly. "I just thought you might be interested in spending some time together outside of your novel. But, if you're not..."
"It isn't that!" Motoko said with a touch of alarm. "Perhaps if I had my own apartment, I wouldn't have other obligations that cut into my time. But I do share a building with friends and we do help each other with our areas of expertise. This time it's my turn. So, if you're interested in me, you'll need to keep that in mind."
Yuto nodded. "I see. Perhaps I'm being unreasonable, but I have to wonder if you have other interests or experiences outside of work or classes… you are obviously a beautiful and intelligent woman, and I hate to think your friends are taking advantage of you."
"I do have other interests," Motoko said uneasily. I imagine once our house guest leaves, my language skills won't be necessary, and I will have more time to spend on us." She pondered a compromise. "Perhaps we could do lunch and get to know each other better. I mean, I don't know much about you other than you're the son of the publisher. I'd like to know you better…."
Yuto checked his watch. "Yeah, that sounds good, Motoko… but I don't think I can cover that time slot today. Maybe some other time." He excused himself.
Maybe my standards are too high? Motoko mused sadly. It seemed like they weren't getting anywhere.
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Kitsune, Naru, and Hyun-Sil had enjoyed an easy time in Hinata City. The streetcar had been uncrowded, and Dr. Juse—who had become the go to doctor of Hinata House—removed the plaster from Kitsune's nose and inspected it.
"Well," she pronounced, "I think it looks well healed, and there doesn't appear to be any disfigurement. So I think you shouldn't need to come back for this." She handed Kitsune a mirror.
Kitsune self-consciously examined herself from as many angles as she could manage. "Yeah," she said with a grin. "I think you're right. Thank you, doc."
"Your arm appears to be healing on schedule too. Just remember that just because it doesn't hurt, doesn't mean you should try to use it. Let it rest." She checked her notes. "While you're here, how are you doing with your Antabuse?"
"Well, I hate it turning meals into Russian Roulette," Kitsune sighed. "It wouldn't be so bad if it only worked on alcohol. But it looks like it works on anything fermented too."
"Ahh," Dr. Juse nodded sympathetically. "Things like natto?"
"That, and we have a Korean house guest... so that's additional foods that I'm never sure about. That's one problem."
"And the other or others?" Dr. Juse prompted.
"This Antabuse stuff makes it so I can't drink. But it doesn't do anything about taking away my wanting ta drink. Is there anything else I can take for that?"
"Unfortunately, no." Dr. Juse shook her head. "There are some journal articles proposing this kind of effect, but nothing that's even in trial stage yet." Her gaze softened. "Miss Konno, this is something that you should remember. There are things that make physical acts impossible. But overcoming the urges... things like alcoholism, drug addiction, things like sexual compulsive behavior or just even falling into bad habits... it is difficult to break the mental patterns. Things like Antabuse draw a line you can't cross. But it doesn't stop you from wanting to cross it. There are programs that can help. But there's no magical, effortless solution."
"Well, thanks for giving it ta me straight, doc. In the meantime, I guess cigarettes and snacks will get me by."
"Hmm," Dr. Juse said. "Tell me... did you smoke when you drank?"
Kitsune pondered that. "Well, I sometimes smoked without drinking, but yeah I think I lit up every time I drank. Why?"
"Well, if you mentally associate smoking with drinking, then it's possible that when you light up, your mind gets in the mood to drink. It's something to think about."
"Okay..." Kitsune said, uncomfortably. Oh come on! Giving up drinking is hard enough! You want me to give up smoking too? "I was expecting you to order me to give that up too..."
"Oh, we'll get there eventually. But right now, we're focusing on the most serious problems first. It's like a fire at a gas station. We focus first on the fire by the fuel tanks, not on the fire by the vending machines. But we still have to put both of them out."
She leafed through some pamphlets. "Before you go, you may want to consider this." She handed Kitsune a list. "These are some alcohol support centers. Most of them are in Tokyo. But a few are here." She gave Kitsune a compassionate smile. "I suggest giving that list to Naru out in the waiting room so it doesn't get lost."
Kitsune gave a rueful sigh. "Yeah, sad to say I'd probably forget otherwise."
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They had just gotten back from Kitsune's appointment and lunch and gathered in the kitchen preparing to make tea. Naru was washing her hands before handling snacks. She waited for the water to get warm, and waited... and waited. Annoyed, she went over to the water heater to check... cold.
Of course something like this would happen now! Naru growled internally, grabbing a phone book and picking up the phone.
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The problem with the plans of going on a dinner date was they needed some place to hang out until the time came. Takane had an apartment but, neither of them trusted their self-control after last night. And, since Takane would be graduating this year, spending a lot of time on a date between now and meal time would be impacting his preparation for finals.
"Maybe we should have dinner in Hinata City and then study?" Shinobu suggested as they walked to his car once classes had ended.
Takane, who had been dreading fighting the after dinner temptation of one of them suggesting It's so late, maybe you/I should stay here tonight, looked relieved. She wouldn't want him to have to drive her home and then himself back to Tokyo in the dark, and he wouldn't want her to have to take the train back alone under those circumstances either.
"That's probably a good idea," Takane replied. "We can use the common areas to study in."
They both hoped they'd be able to respect the boundary line they drew.
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"Fortunately, the water heater was renovated around six years ago, so I didn't have to special order any parts," the repairman said. "You should be good to go." He presented the bill.
Naru was grateful, remembering Kanako's renovation project back when Keitaro was in America. Looking at the bill, she could only imagine how bad the news would be if Hinata House still had the original parts.
Unfortunately, the bill was ¥30,000 more than they had to spare without digging into money allotted for other essential expenses. She sat down heavily, trying to think of the least damaging solution.
Kitsune, seeing Naru's expression, and having more confidence now that the plaster on her nose was removed, smiled at the repairman and with some carefully planned "careless" poses—which had Hyun-Sil, shaking her head in disbelief, in part because of the brazenness and in part because Kitsune somehow managed to pull it off with a cast on one arm. "So, you seem to be so experienced in your field…" Kitsune cooed.
"Ah… well, I did have to go to trade school and…" the repairman babbled, finding it hard to focus on the main issue at hand.
Naru, feeling there was something wrong with this scenario, frantically searched for a solution. If only Shinobu had paid her rent on time, this wouldn't be a pr... wait a minute. She remembered what Shinobu had told her before Hyun-Sil had arrived. "Excuse me for a moment…."
To the others' relief, Naru returned a few minutes later with the money at hand, and the repairman departed, but without Kitsune's phone number.
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Motoko was the first to return home, looking somewhat frustrated. She made her way over to Kitsune's for some tea, and found her with Naru and Hyun-Sil looking at a map.
"Okay…," Kitsune was saying, consulting a handout. "This one looks like it's the closest to where we live. I'm not too familiar with that street though."
"It's a side street," Naru said, having been by there once before. "Looks like it's pretty close to that one church."
"Ooh, right…" Kitsune said, snapping her fingers. While there were temples and shrines all over the city, there weren't even many churches in all of Japan, so the single church in Hinata City was noticeable, even if nobody she knew ever went there.
"Oh, is there a church here?" Hyun-Sil asked perking up. She had thought she would have to go to Tokyo to attend her religious services in Japan, and had bought a JR pass for that purpose.
"Yeah," Naru said, trying to remember. "St. Paul Miki, I think it's called. I remember Keitaro took Nyamo there one Sunday when she suddenly showed up in Japan." She shrugged. She knew that most of the inhabitants of Pararakelse were Catholic and so was the Park family, but she didn't really know much more about the religion than what they had told her when she lived on the island and what she had seen at that shrine at Nagasaki.
"I would like to go there if it is of my own beliefs," Hyun-Sil said. I could look at this place for you too Kitsune-yah while I am there."
"Thank you, Eonni," Kitsune said.
"Hello," Motoko said, realizing the others might not notice her if she stayed silent."
«Hello, Motoko-yah» Hyun-Sil said in Korean, looking up. «You look rather troubled. Is something bothering you?»
The familiarity was strange to Motoko, but the motherly tone did meet her emotional needs and she smiled sadly. «Men trouble.»
"Aigoo," Hyun-Sil said sympathetically.
Naru looked at them blankly. But Kitsune knew a few of the words, having grumbled about "namja munje" herself over the years in some bars. So she whispered it to Naru.
"Oh no, Motoko…" Naru said, motioning for her to scoot into the booth.
Hyun-Sil poured her some tea, and began speaking English to include the others. "Is it men being men? Or is just this one man no damn good?"
"I'm not sure…" Motoko said. "Yuto can be a wonderful charming guy. But today, he asked me to dinner at a hotel. But when I said I had a previous commitment and suggested a lunch date instead, he seemed to get a little cool."
The other three women sweatdropped.
"Erm, has he tried to get you to do anything?" Kitsune asked, warily. There was having teasing fun with the younger members, and then there was seeing more red flags than Beijing had on May Day.
"No…" Motoko said, wondering if his constant brushing her counted. "But I do wonder if perhaps I'm too frigid with my mistrust of men."
"Umm," Naru said gently, remembering how desperately jealous Motoko had been when Shinobu first met Takane. "I've never this man, so I don't know his character. But you shouldn't do anything you're not comfortable with."
"Take it from me," Kitsune said sadly. "That path always leads to regret."
"I'm not planning to be a loose woman," Motoko snapped irritably. "I just wonder if he thinks I'm unapproachable!"
"Well, as long as you don't compromise yourself, that's good," Naru said, relieved.
Motoko felt a little easier. She turned to Hyun-Sil. "Yuto has been busy lately, doing business in Seoul," she said, trying to shift the conversation. "He mentioned a few places he had been, but he didn't think I would be too interested. He said he had business in Cheongnyangni. Is this a publishing district?"
Hyun-Sil, who had been taking a sip of tea, choked on it. When she could speak, she turned to Naru, and hissed, "Kia korero a!"
Naru gave a start. That phrase wasn't English, Japanese, or Korean. That was a term they had picked up on Pararakelse. It roughly meant, Let's talk, and it had been used by young women expressing alarm about a situation. Hyun-Sil mangled the pronunciation… though Naru knew she wouldn't be doing any better.
"Ah… right," Naru said uneasily, trying to think of an excuse. Well, they don't know the term... "I can show you where that is. If you two will excuse us for a moment…."
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"Okay, Naru," Hyun-Sil said, a little shaken. "I'm a bit worried about this man of Motoko-yah's."
"Is there something wrong with what she said?"
"I hope not. But the most well known district of Cheongnyangni has a bad reputation. Prostitution. It used to be legal in South Korea until 2004, and it just went slightly underground. Everybody knows about Oh Pal Pal."
"Okay," Naru said uneasily, reluctant to get involved in an accusation without being completely sure. "Is it possible that it could be something else there too?"
"I hope so… Cheongnyangni is also a train station, and retail area. There's a hospital there too. They're all in favor of removing this blight. But that is what the area is best known for."
"I hope it's something else… her boyfriend is a book publisher. Is it possible that he could be expanding the market there?"
Hyun-Sil shrugged. "I don't know how the publishing works, or if they have any publishers there. Maybe? I don't want to make a false accusation, but I worry. If he does mean that and tells Motoko-yah about this, he has low respect for her intelligence and doesn't think she'll figure it out."
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It didn't go well when they told her. Motoko was polite, but cold... the others could see that she was in denial. "I just can't believe Yuto is that sort of person!" she replied when Naru repeated the facts. «Did you grow up there?» she asked Hyun-Sil in Korean.
«No, I grew up in Incheon,» Hyun-Sil replied matter-of-factly. «But my husband and I lived in Seoul. Prostitution was legal in Korea until 2004, but they started passing laws to stop making it so visible before the 1988 Olympics. I really hope this is nothing, Motoko-yah. I would rather be proved wrong than proved right.»
"I see," Motoko said, returning to English for the benefit of the others. "I just can't make a snap judgment on this…" she said with a sigh. "I need to do more research."
The others knew she wouldn't.
Motoko and Naru left together, Naru working on placating Motoko.
Hyun-Sil looked at Kitsune. "You seem to be the type that likes to cause trouble when you are bored?"
Kitsune was surprised by the change of topic, but nodded, embarrassed by the older woman's insight. "Yeah, sad ta say, I am that way."
Hyun-Sil smiled enigmatically. "Are you feeling bored now? I think your friend might need us to be bored together."
Kitsune responded with a wolfish grin. "What do ya have in mind?"
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Wolfish grin is how Shinobu would have described the way Haruka looked at Seta when the two of them pulled up next to Takane's car next to the garage. It stood to reason. The two of them were married and Seta had spent more time out of the country than in it the past few months. Her hands were active caressing Seta as he parked the vehicle.
Downright horny was how Haruka would have described the way Shinobu looked at Takane. The younger woman looked at Haruka and Seta's affectionate display with longing, wishing she could do this with Takane. She tried to steel herself. Naru and Kitsune had given her sensible advice about self-control and she knew that Takane seemed to have strong—perhaps religious—principles about premarital sex that she didn't want to violate. But right now, these things just felt onerous! It probably didn't help that they were kissing more frequently… at every stoplight on this trip, for example. It definitely didn't help when she was the butt of jokes about being so young and innocent. I'm twenty one now, dammit! I have needs too!
After Haruka and Seta left the carpark—Seta's hand on Haruka's back and rapidly moving below her waist—Shinobu turned to Takane and they kissed again, passionately with a bit of tongue before he broke away.
"I'm sorry," he said blushing.
I'm not! Shinobu thought. "It's okay," she said aloud. "Well, I should give Naru the rent money, and then we can get to studying."
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They technically weren't violating their rules. Takane leaned on her door frame, one foot in the hall while Shinobu rummaged through her folded futon for her purse. Their eyes looked at the futon, met and they both looked away and blushed, knowing they were both thinking the same thing.
Shinobu's expression went from a blush to pale when she rooted in her purse. The money wasn't there!
"Is something wrong?" Takane asked with concern.
"AUUUU! The rent money… it's gone!" she gasped in horror. She knew nobody here would steal it or take it without permission. And it was gone the day after Naru's guest had arrived. Therefore….
Her eyes blazed in anger.
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I guess that younger girl is going to be trouble after all… Hyun-Sil thought to herself. Shinobu had entered the tea house without saying a word… only glaring at her the whole time. When she excused herself to go to the kitchen to begin preparing Naru's favorite Korean meal, Shinobu followed her and sat in the corner and glared daggers, arms folded the entire time. Naru sensed the antipathy, but wasn't sure what it was even about. Takane was following Shinobu but seemed just as confused as she was.
Finally, Hyun-Sil threw down the utensil she was holding and turned to face the younger woman. "What? Why are you following me around, looking like a puppy that needs to be taken out to poop?"
Shinobu let out an outraged squawk at being the target of such a vulgar simile. "I think you know! Nothing like this happened before you came here!"
Hyun-Sil looked at her blankly. "Nothing like what?"
Sensing that Shinobu was angry enough to say something that might be irreparable, Naru cleared her throat and stood. "Outside!" she said to Shinobu. Bowing in apology to Hyun-Sil, she pushed the stunned Shinobu out the door.
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"What's wrong with you, Shinobu?" Naru growled in a tone that, while not as scary as the tone used when she found out about Shinobu pursuing Keitaro, was still pretty intimidating. "I thought we had your issues worked out!"
My issues? Shinobu thought, perplexed. She thinks this is about that? "Naru…" she began, hesitantly. "I was going to pay you the rent this evening… but it was stolen from my purse. I know nobody would take the money without asking. Who else could it be?"
Naru bit back an angry response. Try to be like Haruka… minus the physical violence, she told herself. "Shinobu. Hyun-Sil was with me or Kitsune the whole day."
"Then who could have taken it then? A robber would have trashed my room looking and would have hit the other rooms too!"
Naru sighed, realizing how it could look. "Shinobu, did you forget what you told me before Hyun-Sil arrived?"
Shinobu thought back. "I told you that my mother taught me negative things about Koreans. Are you saying this is all in my mind?"
"No…, I'm talking about when you said If I'm not around and you need to collect my rent, you'll find it here. The hot water heater went out this morning and we needed to get it repaired before you all got back from school. I took that as permission and collected the ¥30,000 rent to make up the difference. I was going to call and let you know, but you left your phone off today." I should have told her that first. I'm an idiot.
Shinobu looked ashamed… she had turned off her phone so she and Takane wouldn't be interrupted on their drive home. "Oh," she said in a small voice. "I'm sorry."
"Shinobu, you know I'm not the one you need to apologize to."
Shinobu looked downcast. "Yeah, I know. I guess I just need time to work up the courage to do that."
Naru gentled her expression. "You're that afraid of her?" She put her hand on Shinobu's shoulder.
"Not so much afraid… I was just angry and afraid that I was proved right… but I was wrong. I'm ashamed and I just find it kind of hard to just walk in and apologize until I can get my feelings under control."
"I see," Naru said softly. "I can let her know you are sorry to smooth the way for when you're ready. But please, Shinobu. Hyun-Sil is a good friend of mine. She kept me from falling into despair when Keitaro and I were going through our rough patch. I'd be happy if you can get along while she's here. If you really think you can't do that though, maybe-"
"No, you're right Naru. I need to stop letting my Mom's ideas shape me."
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Naru extricated Takane from the awkward situation and sent him on his way. It gave her a chance to privately explain what happened to Hyun-Sil.
"I see," Hyun-Sil said. "So, her being afraid of me combined with this incident caused this?" The tone was gentle, but Naru could sense Hyun-Sil was mildly put out.
I guess that's not unreasonable, Naru thought. She was found guilty without even knowing she was being accused.
Dinner was quieter that evening. People noticed Shinobu and Takane's absence from the meal. Mutsumi sent a text saying she was "meeting" someone and would be back late.
I wonder if this is her Senpai, Naru wondered. She knew that Mutsumi had a boyfriend who was doing his internship in Nagasaki, and she was trying to get her internship in the same hospital. When he could make it to Tokyo, Mutsumi simply kept later hours, though she never stayed overnight.
Meanwhile, she needed to separate Kokeru from Sara, as they seemed to be getting a bit too physical in their contact. Then Haruka and Seta showed up, and Naru wished she could separate them too. The unmarried members of Hinata House were squirming at their public display of affection. She had to admit that if her current feelings in advanced pregnancy hadn't put a damper on her libido, those kind of things might make her tempted to retire early tonight with Keitaro.
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Naru returned to her room after time in the hot spring to find Ema pacing nervously outside her door. "Is something wrong, Ema-kun?" Naru asked. "I thought you had to study for a cram school exam."
"Well, I want to, but…" She looked down and blushed.
"What, are Kokeru and Sara causing problems again?" They had been getting more aggressive lately. She just hoped it wasn't Haruka and Seta, because that would be a lot harder to intervene over.
"Not right now…" Ema mumbled, clearly not wanting to snitch. "It's Shinobu and her boyfriend. I don't feel comfortable studying in the same room as them when they're so bakappuru like that."
"I see... I'll have to talk to them I guess. It is a women's dorm after all." She surveyed herself. The yukata thrown over her body, her hair damp... she'd have to put more on to appear in mixed company. "I'm sorry for being lax about the rules. I'll go get changed and speak to them."
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Takane leaned against the doorframe again while Shinobu deposited her books in her room. She then returned, smiling broadly. They embraced and kissed passionately. As far as they knew, everyone was still in the baths... except for Haruka and Seta who had retired early for the night. Tongues intertwined. "It's so late," Shinobu said between kisses. "I hate for you to hate to drive all the way back to Tokyo..." Mentally, she was broadcasting, please stay with me...
Maybe I should get a hotel room and then come back tomorrow and we can have a date, is what Takane knew he should say. But he felt as caught up in the passion as she was. "I hate to go too..." I should not have said that.
Both of them were hoping that the other would make the suggestion that they both were thinking.
They kissed even more passionately, and their hands started to roam. Her body feeling like it was on fire, Shinobu placed her hand on top of his and, guiding it upward, pressed it it firmly against her. She was surprised at her own aggressiveness here, but it felt so right.
Takane responded in kind, caressing where she had pinned his hand. "Shinobu...," he murmured between kisses.
At that moment, Naru slid the door open, wearing a hanten over her yukata for warmth and modesty (her advanced pregnancy made her yukata alone less effective in covering her fully), and stepped out into the hall, prepared to deal with the issue in the lounge. The sounds from down the hall stopped her in her tracks. Turning, she saw Shinobu and Takane heavily involved... Yeah, that's definitely well into "B" right there. She folded her arms and strode over, clearing her throat. "This is a women's dorm, you two...," she growled.
Shinobu gave a yelp of surprise and the couple disentangled themselves awkwardly. Both felt mortified, ashamed... and frustrated at being interrupted.
Naru checked her watch. Ten PM. "Ukyo-san, It is late. If you think it is not safe to drive home, you can go down this road and you'll find several hotels you can choose from." Don't even give them a chance to think this is negotiable or that he can stay here. "But this is after visiting hours."
Takane bowed, suddenly realizing and feeling ashamed of his conduct. "I'm sorry Shinobu, Mrs. Urashima." He turned back to Shinobu. "I'll see you tomorrow if that's okay with you."
Naru thought he looked afraid, like he wasn't sure if Shinobu would want him back. It looks like he blames himself for this...
"Okay," Shinobu said quietly. The two moved to kiss goodnight until Naru cleared her throat again. Takane moved reluctantly down to the car park. Shinobu whirled on Naru and glowered. "What the hell are you-"
Naru glowered right back. "My room. Let's go."
"Why are you so bossy all of a sudden?" Shinobu growled, resenting Naru's tone... the same tone as when she pulled her out of the kitchen.
"Oh, do you really want to do this here?" Naru's cold expression showed she was willing to do exactly that.
Shuddering internally at the thought of the others coming by and overhearing, Shinobu reluctantly followed.
Hyun-Sil said nothing and stayed in the shadows. She knew this Shinobu had issues with her, and it would be best if she didn't make her presence known yet. For an outsider to see the scene might stir further resentment.
Inside the room, Keitaro was wrestling with Hachi who was pretending to chew on his hand. "Come on, you little punk, I'm gonna get you!"
Hachi growled happily.
"Keitaro? Could you take Hachi with you for a bit? We need to have a women's talk here."
Even someone as clueless as Keitaro could sense the radiating tension between the two. "Okay," he said scooping up the dog. "Let's go, you little punk."
Hachi responded by play biting his arm.
Once alone, Shinobu sat, feeling resentful over her predicament. Being interrupted at that stage of making out left her feeling frustrated. She gritted her teeth for the lecture.
"Shinobu..." Naru said wearily, taking off her hanten, do you have any idea what you're getting yourself into?"
"I'm not twelve years old anymore, dammit!" Shinobu snapped.
"This isn't about age. It's about consequences! Are you prepared to wind up like this?" Without warning, she pulled her yukata open and, letting it slide to the floor, put her hands on her hips. Her stern look contrasted with her deep blush.
Shinobu also blushed... and cringed a little. She'd always had been envious of Naru's figure. But now? Naru wasn't wearing a bra, so there were no hiding the advanced stages of her pregnancy. Yes, Shinobu had been aware of bodily changes in Naru. But, as it wasn't polite to stare in the hot spring, she hadn't really noticed just how much she had changed.
Naru's breasts were swollen compared to how they had been before. The veins were quite prominent, the areole had darkened, the nipples were much larger. She was wearing some sort of support belt across her swollen abdomen to support her baby. Stretch marks were clearly visible across what the belt didn't cover. Her legs were… well, okay, the 'swollen' adjective might apply to most of her body. I guess a guy wouldn't find that erotic. She turned away, embarrassed and sensing Naru was too.
"Yeah, I know I'm not pretty," Naru said, leaning down to pick up the robe. "And normally I wouldn't do this. Look, I'm not here to bully you. But you do realize this is what naturally comes from being sexually active, right?"
"Why are you treating me like I'm naive, Naru? I paid attention in health class!"
Naru sighed as she put her yukata back on. "Your period was two weeks ago, right?"
What? "Erm... about then... a couple days less," Shinobu said, coloring a deeper red. In a women's dorm, everyone tended to notice when the others had theirs, but they didn't normally make it a topic of discussion. "Why?"
Naru sat on her bed, grateful that they had finally replaced the futon. It was much easier to get on and off of. "When we got married, I asked Mutsumi about what days of the month I'd be most fertile. She told me that it would probably be between the day before and the day after I ovulated... and that day was halfway through my cycle. So Keitaro and I could take that into account to increase or decrease our chance of becoming pregnant."
Shinobu mentally calculated when that would be for her... and went white as she began to grasp the significance. She had been so overcome with passion that she hadn't even thought about protection or consequences... and there would be consequences. How her parents would no doubt react... how everyone knew women in college were pressured to choose between dropping out or quietly "taking care if it" (the thought of which felt repulsive to her)... the stigma of being an unwed mother... She started to hyperventilate at the realization of what could have happened.
"Mutsumi also told me that this is the time that a woman's sex drive is the strongest... she said that the woman's nature seems to encourage her to get pregnant," Naru continued, hoping that this was getting through. "Whether or not you agree with that theory, if you aren't ready for the burden of having a baby, you need to be aware of that." She looked uncomfortable. "I know you probably think I'm just a meddler right now, and I'm really not comfortable with having this talk either. But you have your whole life in front of you and I just didn't want you to wind up in some kind of mess."
Shinobu brought her hyperventilating under control though she was still trembling. "Ah... well," she said weakly, "I'm glad you jumped in then." The idea of someday having a child with Takane was a welcome thought... but not yet. "Umm... but the way you talk about it, calling it a burden and a mess. Do you hate being pregnant with Keitaro's child?"
"What? No!" Naru said, taken aback. She pondered Shinobu's strange conception of her life, and then realized the younger woman had seen her complain a lot. "Don't get me wrong. Being pregnant has all kinds of discomforts and annoyances that make me irritable, yeah. But having his daughter inside me? Knowing we made this baby together?" She caressed her abdomen. "That's amazing. I'm nervous about how good of a mother I will be, but I want to have his baby… even during that time when I was mad at him, Keitaro was still the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with and have children with. But answer me honestly. Are you really ready for that kind of commitment yet? I don't mean do you hope for that kind of commitment someday. I mean, are you ready to get thrown into the deep end, sink or swim with him once you start having sex?"
Shinobu pondered that. It was one thing to imagine a life together with Takane. But, the way Naru put it? That was not so easy to imagine. She looked up at Naru and saw real concern in the older woman's expression.
Naru looked back at Shinobu. "For what it's worth, I think Takane is a nice guy. I really want it to work out for you both. But I don't think the two of you have known each other long enough to make that same kind of commitment yet. Sure, I think he'd try to do the right thing by you if he got you pregnant, but it would mean drastic changes I don't think either of you are ready for, and if you're not prepared to accept those changes, maybe you'd end up in a broken relationship no matter how hard you tried to make it work."
"I see," Shinobu said, shakily. "So, I guess we should look into protection in case we get tempted again?"
To her surprise, Naru still had a sad expression. "That's not exactly the conclusion I hoped you'd reach...," she sighed. "Let me start over. I don't want this to sound like I'm lecturing you. Look, you're twenty one, Shinobu. So even if I should disapprove of your life choices, I can't tell you to what to do with your life outside of Hinata House, and in Hinata House I can only intervene when the rules are being broken. But not every choice is a good one. I mean, do you remember our talk when you first met Takane? When you asked me about Keitaro and I and sex before marriage?"
Shinobu blushed. "I can't believe I was so forward. So, you and Keitaro never used it?" She cringed. I can't believe I am so forward for asking this! "Erm, sorry. That was uncalled for..."
"It's okay in this case. No, we didn't use contraception. We were willing to have children after we married. We just didn't do anything special to either promote it or prevent it happening." She hesitated. "But that wasn't what I meant. I was thinking more about my telling you that I was glad that I waited until we were married before we had sex for the first time. I think I would have been uncomfortable giving Keitaro access to my body without commitment first, even if we used contraception. Maybe that discomfort would have wrecked our relationship before we married, I don't know. But I'm just glad that those stupid times where I thought I needed to do it to save our relationship got disrupted before we did something we'd regret."
Ohh, Shinobu suddenly realized. So, she's not being a nag... she's really worried about my happiness, Shinobu realized. And she knows what she's talking about… she's faced the temptation I faced. Even if it doesn't turn out like she fears, I should keep it in mind.
"I guess you're right," Shinobu said, finally. "Now that I can take a step back, I see this was a bad decision we were about to make. But it was so damned hard to say no tonight. Let's face it, if you hadn't intervened, I know I wouldn't have even wanted to say no. I just I don't know what I'll do if there's a next time. I don't think I'll be any stronger then."
"Yes, it is difficult," Naru agreed, remembering the time on Molmol when, caught up in the mood, she said to Keitaro that she 'wouldn't mind.' He had misinterpreted it as 'I wouldn't mind if you proposed.' My libido that night could have caused a lot of trouble… If Mutsumi's right about my cycle, I guess that's what was driving me. "And I imagine it's difficult for the guys too."
Shinobu grimaced. "I probably need to apologize to him too. He thinks it's important to wait for marriage and I… Ugh, is he going to think I'm some kind of loose woman now?" she fretted.
"Well, it takes two Shinobu, so if he does treat you that way or thinks the woman is always to blame, he's a hypocrite. But like I said, I think he's a decent guy in spite of your near miss. I guess both of you need to be careful about setting off the other's passions. I'm just glad that Keitaro and I managed to miss each others' clues or got interrupted us going to bed together before we were married."
Shinobu smiled sadly. "I'm sorry. I guess I was just caught up in wanting him, and then when you interrupted me, I reacted like a brat, Naru. You've given me a lot to think about."
I hope it works out for them, Naru thought. I hope they don't ruin it by rushing it.
After Shinobu left, Keitaro returned with a sleeping Hachi... who woke up the second he was put in his bed and began sniffing and licking Naru's face. At least it was easier to keep him off the bed than the futon.
"Trouble on the horizon?" Keitaro asked Naru. Shinobu had been annoyed when they entered the room.
"I'm hoping it's more like trouble averted," Naru replied. "But, this reminded me that we're not the teenagers we once were, and we probably need to start thinking about how what rules need to change and which we need to keep."
"True," Keitaro replied, easing into bed next to Naru. "When I came here, Kitsune and I were the only ones out of high school. Now, only Sara and Ema are in high school." He, suffering from perpetual male cluelessness, wondered what sort of conversation with the innocent Shinobu brought this on.
"Yeah, but I do wonder about the example we're setting for those two. This is a women's dorm after all." Naru had no intention of revealing Shinobu's secrets, but that and Kitsune's DWI wreck were warning signs of what could happen. "Obviously can't tell the adult members they can't act like adults, but maybe we need to remind people that they can't do certain things here when it's supposed to be an environment for minors too."
"Like the drinking?" Kitsune's meltdown had shown that the current drink in private rule didn't work.
"That and the physical displays of affection in public," Naru said, hoping that Keitaro wouldn't deduce what she was trying to keep confidential. Ema's complaints reminded her that the girls not in relationships probably found the physical displays of affection uncomfortable or distracting. "Also for the unmarried, no men in the dorms themselves. For the married, be discreet."
"Well, I'm glad they soundproofed our room," Keitaro said. He leaned over and kissed Naru on the forehead. He could tell that Naru was not really up for any amorous advances tonight, so he lay back on the bed and stared at the ceiling, holding her hand in his. "As for the rest, I own the place and you're the okami, so we do have the right to make and enforce rules. Maybe we can come up with some rules that people won't think are pointing fingers at them."
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When Shinobu went to bed that night, she was still frustrated and lonely, wishing she didn't have to spend the night alone. But she thought Naru was right. Sex was serious with serious consequences, and shouldn't be treated as recreational or an itch to scratch. If she had gotten pregnant, that would have affected all their lives. Even if she didn't get pregnant, the thought of of damaging the relationship by rushing things reminded her this was a risk she didn't want to take. Just because I want it doesn't mean I'm ready for it... I have to try harder, she thought.
But I don't know how...
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Kitsune lay awake in bed. She hadn't bothered to go to the hot springs with the other residents. She couldn't drink, and she was bored as a result… as Haruka warned her about the other day. Unfortunately, she had left her door slightly ajar and had heard parts of what had gone on out there.
Shinobu's making the same mistakes I did back when I was seventeen. I wish I had gotten the talk Naru gave her. Maybe my life would be less of a wreck if I had. Sighing, she rolled over. Who am I kidding? Back then, I never would have listened to anybody saying I shouldn't do what I wanted to do.
What she really meant was, if someone had convinced her to listen, she might have had prospects for a happy life like Naru had, or maybe Shinobu… if she didn't blow it.
Like I did…. Feeling sorry for herself, she began to cry softly into her pillow.
She didn't hear the door get nudged open. But she did hear the padding of feet cross the tatami mats.
"Wrrf?" Hachi vocalized softly. He lay down next to Kitsune and began licking her tears. Naru or Keitaro must have forgotten to close the door all the way.
"Ick," Kitsune said, but she didn't push him away. He laid his head on her stomach and fell asleep. Smiling through her tears, Kitsune began petting him. Her troubles seemed less impossible right then.
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Author's Notes
When it came to planning the Shinobu/Takane scenes, I knew that physical desire for each other would have to be addressed. For awhile I actually considered having them become sexually active and, in the next story arc, they would discover Shinobu was pregnant.
Ultimately, I rejected this for several reasons. From a story perspective because I thought that should be something that could only work if Shinobu was the main character. But from the perspective of the characters, I rejected it because I figured that Shinobu would be the kind of girl who would do what was right once she stepped back and considered where her desires were leading her (as happened in Forever and a Day). And I thought she deserved a guy who would do the right thing by her, even if he was tempted.
So, following Akamatsu's cue of having premarital intimacy interrupted, I took this route instead.
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Regarding Shinobu's reaction to Hyun-Sil's cooking, I found it interesting that many ingredients are the same between traditional Japanese and Korean breakfasts, but they are prepared differently. Korean green tea is made from pan fired leaves. Japanese green tea is made from steamed leaves. So tea connoisseurs say there's a noted difference in taste.
I imagine that Shinobu, used to being master of the kitchen and uneasy around Hyun-Sil, would be put out by the changes and hurt by the fact that the other members of Hinata House were enjoying the novelty of a different kind of cooking.
"and they had barely managed to stop short of B... well, barely... mostly... almost..." ABCD is (or was) a code for how far a couple has gone physically. A is kissing, B is "heavy petting," C is the sexual act, and D is pregnancy.
Jyukkyu Kisoku: Somewhat of a Japanese counterpart to social security.
"but nothing that's even in trial stage yet." That was 2007. I have found articles from 2018 indicating that some drugs are in testing.
"Fortunately, the water heater was renovated around six years ago." When Kanako moved into Hinata House, the manga showed she renovated the place.
"But a certain district of Cheongnyangni has a bad reputation." Cheongnyangni 588 (Oh Pal Pal) was notorious for prostitution. While some laws were passed in 2004, this district did not really see a crackdown until 2013 when vigilante groups began to break up the brothels. At the time of this writing it has been redeveloped, the last illegal brothel removed in 2018.
"they're so bakappuru like that." bakappuru (a combined word from baka and couple) is used to describe couples who are too physically affectionate in public.
"He, suffering from perpetual male cluelessness, wondered what sort of conversation with the innocent Shinobu brought this on." Remember that Keitaro was clueless for years about Shinobu having feelings for him in the manga.