I'd like to promise you an enthralling detective story, I really would, but I can't. Although I do promise I will try making it as entertaining and suspenseful as I can………….. for a parody.
Disclaimer- Unless I am Victor Hugo incarnate, I do not own Les Miserables.
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Chapter 1- On the case
Inspector Javert of the 1st class; prefecture of Police sat in his office, filing over the latest reports. It had been a whole day since Javert's last crime-bust and lately he was feeling very disheartened about the whole affair. You see, crime was very rampant in Paris, let's face it, it was every policemen's dream field but poor Javert had grown tiresome of the same old cases.
It was on this evening that Inspector Javert of the 1st class; prefecture of Police received a report of a different kind. It stated that yet another milkman had been robbed 2 nights ago.
A similar case to this had been reported the week before, and the week before that and the week before that and the week before that and the week before that. So far no lead had been found and it seemed only fitting that Javert should be assigned the case.
Javert jumped from his seat and punched the air with his fist…..I may have made that bit up.
He grabbed his long pink trench coat (silly old twit forgot to do his pinks separately) and with a last preen of his fuzzy, brown sideburns rushed out the door.
It wasn't long before Inspector Javert of the 1st class; prefecture of Police found himself at the crime scene. The shop front looked unscathed and there were no signs he could see of breaking in; this was no blubbering idiot he was dealing with. Javert stood examining the exterior of the shop excavating visually for any clues. A few hours past and it was then Inspector Javert of the 1st class; prefecture of Police noticed the ladder leaning against the side of the shop. He smirked to himself and followed the ladder with his eyes, across the roof and to the chimney.
"That's an unusually wide chimney" he stated aloud scratching his head, or at least he would have been if his hat wasn't in the way. He pushed open the small wooden door and ducked slightly as he entered.
Behind what resembled a counter a young man was huddled over. He was thin and of average height with a thick mop of brown hair flecked with auburn on his oblong shaped head. Around his neck and waist a bright pink apron was tied. Javert felt an immediate sense of sympathy for this fellow victim of washing soap deceit. He approached the man sternly and introduced himself.
"I am Inspector Javert of the 1st class; prefecture of Police. I am here to enquire about a robbery which was reported to the Prefecture of Police, of which I am an Inspector……..first class…. if I do say so myself."
The young man held his sobs back and told his tale of how he came yester morning to open his shop and began his daily routine of counting all the milk bottles he vended.
"I mean, it's not unusual for one to remind oneself of how successful he is" explained the distraught milk man.
Javert nodded in approval.
He continued his account of how he realized that one of the top shelf bottles, which shall remain unspecified due to copyright purposes, was missing. He frantically searched high and low all morning until coming to the conclusion that during the night he had been robbed.
After the man's account he disappeared into some little room that no-one ever noticed before. Five minutes had passed and Javert began to doubt whether he would come back at all.
"But I don't miss a thing" he suddenly started again as though he hadn't been gone at all "I'm afraid our conniving, little thief friend left behind a most dangerous clue"
A sudden silence fell and lasted for a few seconds. "Well then out with it!" Javert snapped, growing frustrated with this man's slowness-for lack of a better word.
He promptly handed Javert a black bundle, Javert very slowly unwrapped the cloth for dramatic effect to reveal a small, silver flute and a half finished fan.
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...cookiemayormaynotbereal
