A/N: WOW! A sudden burst of reviews! How motivational Awe-inspiring! Heart-warming! And… Motivational! I love you guys… :sobs uncontrollably:
Riteo… review replies...
Kaeru Soyokaze: Funny, is it? And yes… the poor boy. Let us weep together for him… :weeps:
esther: Great? Keep going? Of course! Whatever you ask for! And:shudders: the bodyguard… Well, you just gotta keep reading to find out what happens. And SasuNaru? Well, like I said, I don't do romance. But I love it when those two hang out. So yes, they hang out a lot. They my favorite characters! I love fics with them two starring in it. And somehow I don't see Sasuke getting along with the other girls in the show… Meh.. Just my opinion.
KawaiiMisha-san: Neji's Byakugan? Damn… didn't get any of that planned. But I guess if she did see it, she'd probably think it's bloody cool (which it IS of course!) and STILL glomps him. And you hate the bodyguard? Well… I hate him too! Join the club..
adarcel: Yesh ma'am! issues next chpt
Ayuka-chan: Aww… strange how we all sympathize with Neji, yet can't help laughing at his current dilemma, ne? …Poor neji… BUAHAHAHAHAZ… Thanks for reviewing!
YoungSasuke: So, young Sasuke, eh? Better start running before the Raging Blonde Pedophiliac Bodyguard comes after YOU! Muahahahz! No, wait, don't run! Read and review this chapter toooooo!
Heh: You Even more outstanding. Me Grateful for the review. Rika STILL very strongly disliked.
FireDragonBL: Omg… :hugs you: You reviewed three times in a row! Aww… now u definitely deserve… umn… ANOTHER HUG:hugs again: The more reviews, the merrier! And let's just keep reading to find out just what happens to Rika's ass, mmmm?
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Right. The fic! The fic! On with the fic!
Wedding Crashers
Chapter 4: Spying on the Spies
"Why don't you go bug someone else?"
"But honeykins, you promised me you would!"
"First, stop calling me that. Secondly, I did not promise you anything."
Naruto stood outside the ramen stall, watching as Neji walked by, then Rika, then her two bodyguards. They consecutively disappeared around a corner. "Poor guy…" Naruto thought, then shrugged and looked around, waiting.
A few seconds later, he saw Sasuke walking up.
"You're late!" He waved his fist.
Sasuke looked at his watch, "I'm not late. You're just early. You're always early when it comes to ramen."
Naruto looked at his own watch. "Oh… haha!" He laughed, rubbing the back of his head, "Sakura said she can't make it. Said she had some… important things to do with the other girls. Probably either reading girly magazines or spying on you."
Sasuke flicked Naruto's head with a finger as they were about to enter the stall, when he suddenly caught sight of a certain pink hair girl standing at a corner of a building and peering over the other side.
"Umn, Naruto. Isn't that…?" He pointed.
Naruto turned and look, "Hey… Sakura said she was hanging with the girls…"
"Yep, she is." Sasuke pointed in the same general direction, but at a different location, where TenTen was hiding in an empty barrel. Then at Ino on top of a building. Hinata was behind a rather hole-ridden face.
"What the hell are they doing?" Naruto asked with his characteristic eye-squinting.
"If they're spying on someone, they're not very good at it." Sasuke said. He had spotted them without even trying to. Or wanting to. Or even planning to.
Shikamaru, Kiba, Shino and Lee walked by just at the same time.
"I'm so lonely…" Lee complained, "One of my teammates went off to hang out with her girl friends, and the other is getting married to some other girl. I'm left all alone! What, are girls better to hang out with than me?"
"I don't even have to say anything and it's already an insult." Kiba sniggered.
Shikamaru, on the other hand, felt further down on the other end of the spectrum, "This is one of those rare days of rest and relief. Ino is with the girls, away from me. Chouji is in some buffet stuffing himself, away from me. Man, I need more days like this." He rubbed the back of his neck.
"Hinata said she had something important going on too. What are those girls up to anyway?" Kiba, who was looking up at the sky, pondered aloud. He looked back down and spotted Sasuke and Naruto staring in the same direction, "Oh, Sasuke, Naruto, what are you…" He looked at what the team 7 boys were looking at. "What the hell ARE they up to?" He stared at the girls, hiding rather conspicuously in random places.
"If they're trying to spy on someone, they're not very good at it." Shino observed. Naruto and Sasuke just nodded, unaware of just how familiar those words were.
The boys stood at the side of the street outside the ramen stall, watching the girls carry on with their spying affair.
"They have no idea how bad they are at it, have they?" Kiba suddenly blurted, feeling a touch sorry for them.
The girls suddenly ducked behind whatever it was they were hiding behind.
Sakura had jumped behind a nearby door, and from around the corner she had been peeking over, the boys saw Neji appear from behind it, walking very fast, with Rika and her bodyguards in tow. Neji was heading in the direction of the boys.
"Honeykins! Come back!"
"Stop calling me that!"
"Honeykins?" Naruto stared. Neji heard him and looked up at the group of boys, his pale skin turning rather red.
"Show me the sights! I wanna go sightseeing, honeykins!"
"What sights?" Naruto asked.
"There aren't any." Sasuke replied.
"Fine." Neji spun around to her and said through clenched teeth, "The library is over there." He pointed. "The ninja academy is there, the rock with four ugly faces is there, and there's a lake somewhere over there. Why don't you go jump into it?"
Rika looked at him suspiciously, "Will you jump with me?"
Neji cursed aloud.
"And I thought the academy is over there." Rika pointed, "Are you making things up to get over with it?"
"And if I am?"
"Well then, you'll just have to take me wherever you say it is, and then cuz you're making it up, we can get lost together!"
Neji sighed, "Maybe I should go jump into the lake…" looked up at the other boys, who started shaking their heads and waving their arms, frantically signaling at him to not come over.
But Neji was desperate to be with people of similar gender. To hell with that, he'd rather join the other girls than stay around Rika for another minute. Which brought him to wonder just why the four girls were crouching behind those doors, barrels and fences. "Look, I'm gonna hang out with people I know you definitely wouldn't want to, so why don't you go play with your bodyguards or something." He walked toward his friends when Rika suddenly latched on to his arm.
"Why don't you introduce me to them?"
"She meant to say 'introduce them to me' didn't she?" Kiba asked the other boys.
"Her level of self-absorption is shocking." Sasuke said impassively.
"…You can introduce me as your wife!"
"You are not my wife."
"I am going to be!"
"Don't you have any friends to hang out with?"
"You ARE my friend. You're my friendly-husband-honeykins!"
"Ok, now I kinda feel sorry for her." Shikamaru said.
"It is rather pitiful." Lee said.
"Crap, he's coming over!" Kiba noted.
"Don't bring her along. Pleeeease don't bring her along…" Naruto pleaded.
Neji quickly squeezed between the boys to the back of the group, hoping that Rika would go away.
"Ah! Ten meter radius!" Naruto cried as Rika came closer.
"Hi everyone. My name is Rika and I'm Hyuuga Neji's wife! Don't be jealous!"
"Did she just introduced herself?" Shino asked with slight fascination.
"We're guys… How are we suppose to be jealous of her?" Kiba asked no one in particular.
"Of NEJI, you idiot!" Rika spat. "I meant don't be jealous of HIM having a wife like ME!"
"Oh." Kiba mumbled casually, "It didn't occur to me."
"It didn't occur to US." Naruto corrected.
Just then, Mitsuka left his fat partner and walked up to Sasuke, "Heya. I heard your name's Uchiha Sasuke. It's such a cool name. I like it."
Sasuke raised a brow, "Well, I don't recall your name. And if I did, I probably wouldn't like it."
"You're so… intriguing…" Mitsuka grinned.
"You're not." Sasuke replied coolly. He turned to walk into the ramen stall.
Mitsuka smiled coyly, "I like your voice…" He put his hand on Sasuke's shoulder, who grabbed the hand and spun around in such a way that he bent Mitsuka's arm, sending the bodyguard kneeling to the ground.
"Oh, I love a guy who can bring me down." Mitsuka sighed flirtatiously.
The genins shrieked again. Including the girls who were hiding behind various see-through objects a short distance away.
"Just what kind of people turn him on?" Kiba asked in confusion.
"I've never actually seen a masochist in real person before…" Shikamaru thought aloud.
Sasuke glared at the bodyguard, "Don't touch me." The blonde, on the other hand, was in a rather painful position but didn't seem to mind.
"So, you wanna go for a movie later?" Mitsuka suddenly asked.
The genins shrieked again. A noisy crash was heard as Ino fell off the top of a building and landed safely onto a few sacks of beans, then quickly dived under one.
"Dude! He just asked you out on a date!" Naruto blurted.
"Well, isn't it obvious?" Mitsuka said, looking at the wide-eyed boy, "What, don't tell me you're jealous?"
Naruto's eyes got wider, "Jealous of who and of what? Hey, what the hell are you implying!"
Mitsuka ignored the other blonde and pulled his detained hand closer to himself, hence dragging Sasuke a little nearer, "So what about it?"
Sakura burst out from her hiding place, crying dramatically, "DON'T DO IT!"
"ATTACK!" Ino jumped out from her sacks of beans, almost skidding on some beans at the same time.
"We were meant to attack?" Hinata crawled out.
Sasuke gave Mitsuka a disgusted glare and roughly pulled his hand back. "I hate movies."
"Get back here, Mitsuka." Rika called. The bodyguard pouted and returned to her. "I'm the one that gets fawned over," She reprimanded, "Not anyone else, and certainly no other guy!"
Sakura and Ino were, on the other hand, still charging.
"She's MINE!" TenTen leapt out from behind and landed right in front of Rika, ready to strike.
The girls and the bodyguards engaged in a violent battle (bitch fight) as the other boys stood outside the ramen stall in a discussion.
"Man, Neji, I gotta hand it to ya. You had her at your back for seven hours this entire morning and you're still alive." Kiba said.
"You survived her. Now I think you can survive anything." Naruto said in sincere admiration.
"I think I'm gonna die." Neji said glumly, looking down solemnly at the floor.
"Look man, we'll try to get you out of this, ok? I'll talk to Hinata about it." Kiba said, feeling very sorry for the Hyuuga genius.
"Not like there's anything she can do." Neji said angrily, glaring at Rika who was further off yelling useless ninja techniques for her bodyguards to perform.
"Nah… we'll think of some more stuff." Naruto said, "We've got Shika on the team! About five brains there. And… Sasuke?" Naruto watched his teammate walk into the ramen stall.
"What? I'm starving."
"Hey! Aren't you gonna help Neji? He needs our help!"
"Look, I'm not the one getting married. Don't get me involved." Sasuke said.
"Oh Sasuke baby!" Mitsuka called melodiously from the bitch fight field, holding Sakura in one hand and Ino in the other, "I'm fighting this battle of love just for you, my sweet!" He crashed the two girls' heads together.
"Oh, I think you were involved from the very beginning." Naruto snickered.
Sasuke stared at the battle scene in disbelief, lower eyelid twitching, wishing this wasn't true. He glared at Naruto and walked back into the discussion. "Fine. Do you want it to look like it was an accident, murder from another village, or that they spontaneously combusted?"
"We… weren't really planning on assassinating them…" Kiba said quietly.
"Why not?" Neji asked, a little too quickly.
"YES! I WIN!" Back at the battlefield, Mitsuka threw the tied up bodies of the four girls onto the ground, "Sasuke honey! Come to me, my precious trophy!"
Sasuke cringed, "Yea, why not?"
A/N: Wahoooz. Poor Neji and Sasuke! hugs the boys Just what did I get them into? Herherherzzz…. … …. That laughter was meant to be evil, by the way. Well, just review! Review! I love reviews! Reading reader responses (Alliteration!) just makes me so… motivated and awe-inspired and heart-warmed and motivated!
Peace out!
-sylver