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DISCLAIMER: I do NOT own any of The OC except Marty Jefferson.
8. I couldn't tell you
Sandy stared at his wife. With one hand she was holding Julie, the other one was resting protectively on her stomach. Her lips trembled and she opened her mouth to say something but Sandy was faster.
"No, forget it. I don't wanna hear your excuses." He shouted at Kirsten and rushed past them to the front door when Caleb came to stop him.
"No, stay. Kirsten has to tell you something." He said sharply.
"Well, I don't wanna hear that." Sandy replied angrily.
"Dad, please. Please listen to her. You'll understand …" Sandy turned around. Ryan and Seth had appeared on the bottom of the stairway. And behind them stood Marissa and Summer.
"Yeah, Mr. C, Seth's right. Please listen to her." Summer spoke for everyone.
"Sanford, I know it's hard and you can leave nevertheless, but listen to your wife." That had been Caleb. Sandy was perplexed. So, everyone supports her. He wondered why and agreed. He wanted to know why he should listen.
Everybody was nervous. Together they tried to represent a family. Except Sandy. He was sitting alone in this big armchair while everyone else gathered around Kirsten. Summer was sitting on Seth's lap, squeezing his hands in excitement. The same worked for Marissa and Ryan. Caleb and Julie sat on Kirsten's left and right side, both of them holding one of her hands. It was a tense situation and Kirsten began telling.
"I want you to know, that I still love you." Her first sentence. She looked into Sandy's eyes, but what she found was just a cold glance in them. Then she kept telling.
"I don't want you to come back because of pity or sympathy. I just want you to know." She took a deep breath. Sandy still didn't react. He just waits for me to end my story. 'Cause then he's allowed to leave me once again. She shivered at the thought of being abandoned by her husband a second time.
"It's okay, sweetie. Take your time." Julie had felt the shivers. She tried to give her 'daughter' the confidence she needed so much.
"I'll never forget that night five months ago. Marty and I, we had a great dinner at 'The Arches'. It was something special for me. Not because I loved him but because he was someone I hadn't seen in years." She stopped. Everybody was watching her. Except Sandy. He looked at the rug. I have to tell you even if it hurts.
"After that dinner, I –I – I drove him to his place. He was living in a motel. The 'Mermaid Inn', you know. He didn't have a car, so I wanted him to drop there. I was a little drunk and when we stood there I – I gave him a quick, friendly kiss on his cheek. I wanted to go, but he pulled me into his room, and the –" The tears had come back. She wanted to be strong but it hurt too much. I can't tell him.
"Then you fucked him, didn't you? Why are you telling me this? To hurt me? To hurt me just a little more than two months ago? Why do you do this to me? Do you hate me that much?" Sandy yelled at Kirsten. He freaks out. I knew he would freak out.
"No, it's just because – Sandy! I didn't fuck him. I didn't want to. I tried to fight against him. Tried to escape. I really tried to defend myself, but –" Her sobs cut off her voice. She squeezed the hands of Julie and Caleb. She didn't want to be alone. She needed him so much and he just wasn't there.
"What does that mean?" Sandy's eyes were shocked and scared. Had he heard it right? Was his wife just about to tell him that she had been…? He didn't finish this thought.
"Dad. Mom had been raped." Seth was talking. He was holding Summer who was shaking. He gave Sandy a pleading look to believe him.
"Kiki, is everything alright?" Caleb was concerned about his daughter. She nodded and then leaned against Julie who tried to soothe her with motherly rocking and mumbling.
"Sssshh. It's okay, darling. We're here. Don't be afraid. It's over now." Julie whispered into Kirsten's ears. Kirsten's cries got lower and she clung to Julie. Sandy was shocked. He couldn't believe what he had heard. And he couldn't believe to see his wife like this. Never before had he seen her so terrified. Never before had he seen her breaking down.
"Maybe we should go upstairs. Mom, can we help with something?" Marissa broke the ice by asking her mother. She was talking of Ryan, Seth Summer and herself. They were used to this image. A crying Kirsten in Julie's arms. The last two months had shown them many times.
"No, honey. We're fine. Go upstairs or outside or do whatever you want to do" She smiled at Marissa. Then she glanced at Sandy. He who had stood up was still not moving. Mom had been raped. The words rang through his mind. His beautiful strong wife had been raped. And he hadn't noticed it at all. That's why she reacted the way she did. Now everything made sense to him. Especially her behavior after that night. Why haven't I noticed? He blamed himself for it. Suddenly he recognized somebody talking to him. It was Caleb.
"Sanford, do you hear me? Julie will drive home with Kirsten. She needs some rest. You can stay here if you want." Sandy nodded. Of course, he was still standing in the living room of the Nichol mansion. He had totally forgotten the world around him. His wife had just broken down in front of him and he hadn't done anything to prevent that. He hadn't been there for her when she had needed him most. Everything was his fault.