02:13 – Fourth Children
Disclaimer: I do not own Evangelion or any of the characters they are the property of their respective creators. Please be aware that no profit is being made from this work of fan fiction.
"Wake up Shinji! Please! Wake up! I promise I'll never doubt you again just don't leave me alone…"
I fell across his prone body, desperately pleading for him to open his eyes, to tell me he was ok. I had finally heard those words, the ones I had secretly longed for since he kissed me, the ones I had been uncertain of since he pulled away. For the first time since my mother died I had someone that truly loved me and now he lay unconscious on the floor.
"Your efforts are without merit pilot Soryu, Ikari will not awaken."
I turned to look at her, standing over me still wearing nothing but his shirt. An irrational anger filled me as I got to my feet, fixing her with my gaze.
"Wondergirl…you, this is your fault! I told you to keep away from him!"
Her eyes hardened slightly and she did not back down from my gaze. If it had been anyone else I would have expected to see flames of rage but with her I was greeted by nothing but coldness.
"Ikari does not belong to you, who he spends time with is none of your concern. Nor is who he chooses to kiss…"
As her words reached me I saw red and without thinking lunged at her, hands aimed at her throat. We both went down falling to the floor in a tangled heap, my body on top of hers. At once I struggled to get a grip, desperately trying to choke the life out of her. I was so intent on doing so I didn't notice when her arm cam up suddenly and her fist struck me in the side of the head. I was momentarily surprised by how strong she was as I lost my balance and fell to the side. Shaking my head to clear it I rolled to my feet, standing face to face with wondergirl, now that she too had gotten to her feet and was about to lay into her once again when the sound of a gunshot rang out.
"ENOUGH! Both of you!"
I turned to find Misato standing in the doorway, a group of rather scared looking paramedics behind her. Already they were beginning to recover and were examining Shinji, the first calling over the others as they lifted him on a stretcher and carried him away. I desperately wanted to go with him but seeing the look in Misato's eyes I knew I would not be allowed. She wanted answers and right now that was exactly what I did not want to give…she walked over to stand between us, holstering her sidearm as she did so.
"You two, sit down."
Her voice was dangerously quiet, offering no room for complaint. Wondergirl and I took seats at opposite end of the living room, Misato standing in the middle.
"Now, the two of you are going to tell me what the hell you think you were doing having a cat fight and why Shinji was unconscious."
Neither one of us spoke, it seemed that wondergirl was about as keen to tell Misato everything as I was…I could tell Misato had noticed her current state of undress and already her face held a frown.
"Rei…can you please tell me why exactly you are wearing one of Shinji's shirts?"
"Pilot Ikari offered it to me because my clothes were wet from the rain."
Misato nodded, I had to admit it did not seem like she was lying, that did sound like something that idiot would do. The question I wanted answered was what she was doing here in the first place but when Misato turned her attention towards me it seemed as if I would not have the chance.
"Asuka…what happened to Shinji?"
"He…"
I stumbled over my words, not wanting to think about that moment.
"I was just about to leave when he came after me, he…he said something to me and then collapsed, clutching at his chest…"
"What did he say to you?"
"I…"
I didn't want to tell her, his words were meant for me and me alone…I turned away from her, not willing to meet her gaze. She reached down and caught hold of my chin, turning my head to face her.
"Asuka…tell me what he said to you."
"'I love you.'"
Her hand fell away from my face even as she stepped back in surprise. For a moment she simply stood there, eyes closed and unmoving, I had no way of knowing what was going on in her head.
"Rei, if your clothes are dry please get changed and head back to your apartment. I will be handling this incident personally; it does not need to be brought to the Commander's attention. Understand?"
Looking over at her for the briefest of moments I though I saw a flicker of defiance in her eyes before it vanished leaving them impassive as before.
"Yes major."
Those were her only words as she silently complied with Misato's orders, dressing and departing, leaving us alone.
For a while we stayed as we were, I seated in one of the chairs while Misato stood in the middle of the room, eyes closed. Emotionally drained I sat there with my knees hugged up against my chest, silently praying that Shinji would be ok. When at last she opened her eyes I could see she was still angry and I bore the full brunt of her tirade.
"How could you be so stupid? You were already almost got yourself a one-way ticket back to Germany after the last stunt you pulled! Do you know how much I had to beg the Commander not to ship you off right away? If he found out that you were fighting with Rei…what the hell were you thinking?"
"I…"
Feeling my own anger surface, my own rage at my feeling of weakness I got to my feet screaming in her face.
"…She kissed him! That tramp kissed my Shinji! She tried to steal him away from me but I won't let her! I won't!"
"And what do you think getting into a fight with her will prove? That you're a bigger emotional fuck up than she is? Shinji was unconscious and all you could think about was kicking the hell out of some other girl…you don't deserve him!"
Her words hit me like a slap in the face as for the first time I realised how foolish I had been…lashing out at wondergirl wasn't going to help Shinji, in truth it would have only hurt him more…I knew he loved me, what was the point in fighting then?
Pride.
My selfish, stupid pride. I couldn't let her insult me that way, I couldn't accept that someone like her would dare try and take something of mine away from me. I hit her because I wanted to, to show her how much better I was, that a doll like her could never beat me and in letting go she had truly won, demonstrating that my pride meant more to me than Shinji.
"…I lost."
I spent that night in my room for the first time in a while, finding no comfort in the familiar surroundings. Rage swirled within me, the humiliation I had suffered in losing to that doll eating away at me constantly. When Shinji had surpassed me as a pilot I had been angry at first but the shock of seeing him hurt, injured fighting to protect me had stripped away my delusions, taking me past my rage and to the truth that lay beneath. As he had lain in the hospital for the first time I had been able to admit to myself that I loved him, that the shy boy I had first met that day on the aircraft carrier had somehow made his way into my heart. Having both seen and felt the terrible rage that resided within him, the terrible emptiness created by the loss of his mother, the abandonment of his father I had found that he was like me though with him the darkness ran even deeper…perhaps that was what gave Unit-01 it's strength, it drew upon the dark place inside him, using it to bring death to all those who stood against him…
Wondergirl was a different story altogether…her synch ratios are mediocre at best, all she had ever done is acted as backup. In all the time she had been a pilot she had done nothing, amongst the three of us she is most definitely the least. Yet, she is the Commander's favourite, he treats her almost like his own daughter…I've heard about the run down piece of crap that's her apartment, the awful conditions she lives in, it makes me believe he thinks of her as his child even more when you consider how he acted towards Shinji. She does everything he says, never stopping to question his orders, always obeying mindlessly. To lose to someone like her was not something I could accept, even if it were a hollow victory on her part…he loved me, me not her. Nothing she could do what change that, she would not take him away from me, not when I told him that I loved him in return…I was drawn from my thoughts when the door to my room slid open and Misato stepped inside. I rolled over onto my back to look up at her, wondering what could be behind her sudden intrusion.
"He's alive."
As soon as I heard those two words my heart leapt. Shinji was alive…
"They just finished operating and he is in stable condition, according to the doctors he will be unable to pilot for a while. The Commander has been informed of this and because of the risk this presents you and Rei are being put on twenty-four hour alert. Tomorrow you will be transferred on a temporary basis to Nerv and will remain on site until he is fully recovered or an alternative backup pilot can be found, understood?"
"But…that means I won't be able to…"
"Asuka…he will be fine. He's lived through worse…"
"But!"
"No Asuka. Not this time. Despite what you may have said in the past Shinji remains our best pilot, he has the highest kill rate of the three of you. With him out of action the fights just got that much harder. You and Rei both need to work on your ratios and combat drills, we can't afford any mistakes…"
With that final comment she turned and left, leaving me alone with my thoughts…thoughts of Shinji, of the time I would be unable to see him, the time I would be unable to declare my love…I know he will wait for me, all I have to do now is survive so that one day we will be able to leave this place and never look back…
I slept late the next morning, having been up late. Misato too seemed a little sluggish and I realise that perhaps this was getting to her as well…when I had flown off the handle at her it had been a mistake, she cared for Shinji as much as I did, just in a different way. Despite the teasing she really does care about him, almost like a younger brother, perhaps even a son. At times she starts to feel like my mother and it's those times that I try and distance myself from her, I find it easier to speak to her as an older sister. We shouldn't have fought; all it did was bring us pain and pain to Shinji.
"I'm sorry…"
She looked up at me, confusion in her eyes.
"For when I screamed at you in the hospital…I was wrong."
She shook her head.
"No…I didn't try hard enough. I was going to let them kill him…if it hadn't been for Unit-01…"
"I think…that we were both wrong, in different ways. Truce?"
"Truce."
She stood up and embraced me, pulling me into a gentle hug.
"Don't worry Asuka, it will all be ok."
After that we spent the time in silence, neither one of us knowing quite what to say. Peace had been restored between us but still there was emptiness in both our hearts, one caused by the absence of a certain brown haired blue-eyed boy…
I took it upon myself to cook breakfast, not trusting Misato in the kitchen. My culinary skills being minimal I stuck to making toast, after depleting almost an entire loaf of bread we departed, heading to Nerv at Misato's usual frantic pace. When we arrived Dr Akagi was there to meet us, immediately pulling me away for a synch test.
"I'll be in the control room Asuka, we'll check out your accommodation afterwards, ok?"
"Ok."
The test went well, my ratio remaining stable although I was a little disappointed that it had not improved at all. After that Misato took me to the room I was staying in, it wasn't too bad, before heading back to the command centre. Having a little free time on my hands I decided to take a walk, eventually finding myself outside the office that had been temporarily assigned to Kaji. I haven't seen him since that night…the one when I kissed Shinji. A lot has changed since then, my crush is all but forgotten although he does still hold a special place in my heart. Kaji is like the father I wanted or perhaps the older brother I never had, he was always trying to take that role rather than the one I constantly tried to push him into, I should have known the minute I saw him look at Misato…
I knocked on the door to his office and received no reply, wondering if he was in I pushed the door open only to find the room dark, illuminated only by the glow of his computer. I was about to leave when I something on the screen caught my eye, it seemed he was reviewing our synch tests. Scanning across them I noticed something was wrong, rather than the three I had been expecting there were in fact four, moving the pointer to select it the pilot data loaded onto the screen and I was forced to take a double take when I read the name.
"What in the name of…who in the hell decided to make him a pilot?"
"Asuka?"
I whirled around to find Kaji standing in the door way, looking at me with a puzzled expression on his face.
"Asuka, what are you doing in my office?"
"I…um…"
I floundered for an answer, trying desperately to stop him from realising what I had seen. Too late it seemed as his eyes strayed to the computer screen, then back to me.
"Asuka…"
No longer seeing a point in hiding it I decided to confront him.
"Since when, since when was that stooge declared the fourth?"
"A few days ago, the Marduke institute notified the commander just as Unit-03 was dispatched here. He was approached and accepted the candidacy; he was designated fourth child and synch tested immediately. He will come on active duty as soon as his unit arrives, acting as backup for Unit-01."
"Why…why him?"
"Because he was the one they wanted…you know his sister is going to be given special treatment because of this, she will be given the best care that Nerv can offer…"
His sister…I had only heard about that once or twice. I heard that she had been injured in the first battle, the first time Shinji acted as a pilot. She got hurt when a shelter was damaged, both legs almost crushed by falling rubble. Hikari had been the one to tell me, when I mentioned it to Shinji he had refused to talk about it. Feeling uncertain ad more than a little confused I made to leave, stopping when I felt his hand on my shoulder. I turned to face him and was surprised to find his eyes hard.
"Asuka, you mustn't tell anyone about what you saw, understand?"
There was something about how he said it, an underlying threat I had never before heard from him. Feeling a little frightened I nodded and he released his grip.
"I'll see you later Asuka."
With that he closed the door leaving me alone in the hallway. Feeling increasingly worried and afraid I ran all the way back to my room and locked the door.
The next few days passed quietly, right up until the point Misato informed me she was going to the second test site to perform the orientation for the fourth child. I made sure to act surprised at this news, pestering her for information as if I had not expected a new pilot to be chosen. All too well I recalled the unspoken threat in Kaji's words when he had spoken to me and did not want to put it to the test…it seemed she believed me because she showed no signs of suspicion, Misato's not the best of actors so I assumed I was ok. I had no test that day because both she and the doctor would be at the second test site, leaving me pretty much at a loose end. Not allowed to leave the base I had wondered it's halls, right up until the point the angel alarm had begun to sound. I ran all the way to the locker room, changing quickly and paying no regard to wondergirl. All that mattered was the angel, stopping it before it could reach the city, protecting those who lived within, protecting Shinji…this time I would be the one to come to the rescue.
When I reached the cages I was told very little and was hurried into my Eva. Once inside I opened the comm. channels only to pick up bits and pieces, enough to tell me there had been an accident at Matsusura although no-one knew exactly what had happened. They were unable to contact the people there, meaning no Misato, because of that the commander himself took control of the operation.
"Unit's 00 and 02, once you are on the surface you are to take defensive positions around the number twelve elevator. Unit-01 will arrive three minutes later, you are to guard it until the angel comes into effective combat range then withdraw, understood?"
Unit-01? But how! Shinji was still in the hospital…
"Sir, how can Unit-01 be operational? Shinji is still in the hospital!"
"That is not your concern pilot, you need only obey my orders not ask foolish questions. Understood?"
"Yes sir."
I desperately wanted to ask more but the undisguised menace in his voice made me hold my tongue, he had already warned me once, I could not risk messing up again and being sent away from Shinji. Unit-02 hit the surface and I followed my orders as directed, positioning myself along side Unit-00 in front of the number twelve elevator. In the mean time a shadow appeared on the horizon, what I assumed must be the angel. Shifting my view to get a better look at it I was forced to do a double take, to my horror realising that it was another Eva.
"That's an Eva!"
"Unit-03, it has been possessed by the angel, it is now classified as the thirteenth angel."
"But, there's a pilot inside that thing!"
"Irrelevant, it will be destroyed. Pilot Soryu, you are treading on thin ice. I will tolerate no more outbursts."
I wanted so badly to slap him, that bastard. How could he act as if someone's life didn't matter? Even that stooge didn't deserve to be treated like that…suddenly there was a sound behind me and I turned to find Unit-01 standing there.
It felt different, the familiar presence was replaced with one that was far more malevolent, a feeling of barely restrained madness seemed to radiate from it. As the angel possessed Unit closed the remaining distance between us and it I followed my orders and spun out of the way, looking back as Unit-01 suddenly sprang to life, catching the black Eva around it's throat. The possessed Unit tried to break Unit-01's grip but to no avail, the purple Eva tightened it, snapping the other Eva's neck. When it fell silent I expected the attack to end but was horrified when Unit-01 continued to fight, tearing the other Eva apart. Blood spattered in all directions, covering the city like it had when it had broken free of the last angel. But, this time Unit-01 was not berserker and Shinji was most definitely not at the controls…
Time seemed to slow as I watched it lift the entry plug, knowing who it was inside. I watched as the hand closed sharply, crushing the plug and most likely killing it's occupant. The ruined plug dropped to the ground even as Unit-01 fell silent. The only thought running through my mind was how I could possibly break it to Shinji…that his Eva had murdered his best friend…
AN: I decided to try a different approach this time, something more akin to the second chapter of Forgotten. I hope this worked ok…
Thank you all for sticking with me despite the delays.
Till next time,
Hououza02 is not preread.