A/N: Hey, this is my first CSI fic, so I hope it isn't a total disaster, but if it is, I tried. I would love your reviews, good, bad, and in between. I can't improve if you don't tell me what's wrong. i watch this show religiously, so I'm pretty sure I have the characters right, well at least how I perceive them.
Your persona is so bright and cheery. Your love for life is infectious, your laughter, contagious.
I see you almost everyday. I see you at work, I see you at breakfast, I see you at clubs, and I see you in my dreams. You are everything to me, and you don't even know it.
I watch you, did you know that. I watch you everyday while you work in your lab, hunched over a microscope with your brow furrowed while you figure out the substance on the stage. I watch you in your lab when you rock out to Manson, or when you goof around with markers. I watch you plaster on a smile when you are really frustrated, and just want to scream. I watch you try to please everyone, even though it's a lost cause. I watch you.
I see you, did you know that. I see you when you leave the break room with a cup of coffee, or your lunch. I see you get your special blend of coffee out of its hiding spot in your lab. I see you after a long hard shift when your tired and you just want to go home. I see you walk in, after a good sleep, with your eyes bright and sparkling. I see you.
I notice you, did you know that. I notice your goofy smiles, and your sideways glances at people passing by. I notice your loud and crazy shirts that you wear everyday. I notice your hard work, and the pressure you're put under. I notice the way your hands shake sometimes. I notice you.
I love you, did you know that. I love your furrowed brow, I love your Manson, well, I love you rocking out to it. I love your ability to forget your frustrations. I love the way you try to please people; I love your coffee. I love the way you think no one knows about your secret hiding spot. I love you when you're tired; I love you when you're wide-awake. I love your goofy smiles; I love your sideways glances. I love your crazy clothes. I love your hard work, and I love the way you are so brave. I love you.
I'm always thinking about you, when I wake up, I think about you, when I go to sleep, I think about you, and anytime in between, I think about you. Without you, my life would be empty.
"Hey, Greg," I said as I walked into your lab. You were hunched over a microscope with your brow furrowed over the mysterious substance in front of you.
You only wave your hand in the air to acknowledge my presence, but for me, it's enough.
"I have some samples I need you to run for me," I asked as I put the evidence bags on the counter next to you, "Just page me with the results when you finish."
I walked out of the lab and into the AV lab across the hall. I talked with Archie while he set up the surveillance tapes from the security cameras. I hadn't been there two minutes when my pager went off.
Einstein requests your presence immediately.
I looked over at you through the glass walls of the labs. You motion for me to come over, and being the nice guy that I am, I come.
"Greg," I said exasperated, "I'm a lil' busy. What do you want."
"I just wanted to tell you that I would be more than happy to run the samples for you, and that I'll have them done in an hour," you said with your goofy grin plastered on your face.
I look at you for a minute before replying, "Is that all you paged me for?"
"Well," you stumble, "I was also wondering if you wanted to get some breakfast with me after shift."
Did he just ask me out? No, he couldn't have. He only thinks of me as a good friend, it's only an innocent meal together as friends.
"Um, sure I'll go," I answer, "But next time will you just wait until I come back instead of paging me over."
"No problem," you said as you grabbed my first evidence bag off the counter, "I'll meet you in the locker room after shift."
I nod in agreement and walk back into Archie's lab.
--
"Hey, G," I say when I walk into the locker room, "Are you in here?"
There was no reply. I guess he has some stuff to finish. He should be here shortly. Right after that thought you walk in, and immediately take off your lab coat and throw it into your locker.
In two minutes your street clothes are on, and you're ready to go.
"Ready," I ask as I stand up from my seat on the bench.
"Yup," you reply, "I'm ready to go. I know the perfect place we can go. They have the best pancakes."
--
Our breakfast was great really. I had so much fun hanging out with you. However, I can't seem to forget my feelings for you, even though I know you don't return them.
If only I could get up the courage to tell you how I feel. If only you could send me a sign to let me know you feel the same way. If only I knew what you felt, or if you would laugh in my face. If only.
I can't keep living like this, you're tearing me apart inside, and my heart can't take the pain. I need to know what you're feeling, what you're thinking, and what you're questioning, because there is one thing I don't question, and that's you.
Your heart is pure, and your perception of the world unclouded by evil. Your carefree attitude is amazing.
I've made up my mind. I'm going to ask you over to play video games, and I'm going to put it all out there, because I can't continue to live in fear, and I can't keep my feelings hidden away.
--
"Hey, G, do you want to come over my place tonight. We can play video games, eat pizza, and have a couple beers," I asked towards the end of shift that night.
"Yea, sure man," you replied.
I smiled, "Meet me at my house right after shift. You know where it is."
--
I'm waiting for him to arrive, and I'm shaking like crazy. I'm so nervous I can't sit still for more than a minute.
I answer the door after you ring the doorbell, "Hey, Greggo," I said as I closed the door behind you.
We exchange pleasantries, and you pick up your favorite controller. I laugh as I sit down next to you, and watch you immediately pick out the same racecar you drive every time we play.
After and hour, I put my controller down, and I turn to look at you.
"Greg, we need to talk," I said, my mouth dry.
"Sure, Nicky, what's up," you reply. My heart skips a beat as you say my nickname.
"We-l-l," I stumble on my words, "I really care about you, Greg, I really do. You are one of my best friends, but lately I've been having stronger feelings towards you, and they are freakin' me out. I don't want to freak you out, or anything, and I completely understand if you throw stuff at me, but I can't keep it inside anymore, it's tearing me apart. I love you, Greg, I love you with all of my heart."
You stare at me a minute before opening your mouth to reply, "It's about time, Nicky." With that you grab me around the shoulders and pull me into a deep, passionate kiss.
Your love is honest and truthful, your heart is big and generous, and our relationship is never-ending.
From the day I told you my feelings, you have treated me like gold. You have respected my fear of coming out, and you have supported my every decision.
Our relationship is strong and powerful, our love for each other is eternal.
Everyday at work we sneak quick glances and smiles; we exchange quiet moments and looks with each other.
Everyday I watch you, I see you, and I notice you. Everyday I hold you, I touch you, I kiss you, I talk to you, and I love you.
Everyday I listen to your laughter as it reminds me of the pure, carefree person that you are, and I begin to laugh with you.
Your persona is so bright and cheery. Your love for life is infectious, your laughter, contagious.