02:19 – Comfort

Disclaimer: I do not own Evangelion or any of the characters they are the property of their respective creators. Please be aware that no profit is being made from this work of fan fiction.

In those few fleeting moments, as I had sat isolated in the entry plug of Eva Unit-01, unable to do anything more than watch as Asuka went out to face the angel. I had a bad feeling from the beginning, something in the back of my mind told me that it should have been me out there facing the angel not her…I held my breath as she took the shot, watching as it arced up into space before dissipating as it struck the Angel's AT field. I heard somebody say something about the range but it barely registered, my attention was solely focused on the feed coming from Unit-02.

The screen had lit up suddenly and Asuka had began to scream, her hand flying to her head, fingers clawing at her temples, as if trying to tear out something trapped inside. At once I tried to eject the plug to go and help her but to my horror I found it would not comply. Linking my mind with the Eva, I tried to force it to let me free only to meet resistance in the form of the presence I had encountered during my time trapped inside the Eva's core. It blocked me at every turn, preventing me from reaching the places I needed to go, to the part that controlled the entry plug interface.

"SHINJI!"

The sound of her calling my name woke me from my struggle, reminding me of my purpose. With renewed determination I forced the presence backward, driving it from my path as I stepped forward into the light, claiming my prize…the neck armour lifted and the entry plug shot out, discharging its contents rapidly before unlocking the hatch for me to get out. Without a moment's hesitation I was out of the plug, racing for the elevator, any route to the surface world. I heard Misato calling out to me, questioning my behaviour but I ignored her, all that matter to me now was Asuka.

"SHINJI! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING! GET BACK HERE!"

The technicians standing at the elevator doors were too stunned to stop me; I flew past them before slamming my fist against the button, not noticing the small trickles of blood. Trapped inside the small metal room, each moment seeming like an eternity as I waited to reach the surface, to be there for her, to rescue her from her pain. As the doors opened I began to run, moving faster than I ever had before, going flat out towards where the red Evangelion stood waiting. The rifle now lay slack in its arms, the barrel pointing at the ground.

The light was gone now, the Eva silent. Wasting no time, I ran to the foot of the red behemoth, and accessed the panel to trigger the emergency release. High above me the armour snapped open and the plug was ejected, crashing to earth only a few hundred yards from where I stood. I closed the distance in an instant, not caring when the heated metal burned my hands, caring for nothing other than her safety. For a moment I remembered an image of the one time I had done this before, after Rei and I had fought the fifth Angel. Back then she had been the most important person to me; it's funny how things change…

At last the hatch was open and I was climbing inside, scanning the interior for signs of life. I found her there, still seated in the pilot's chair, eyes tightly closed. For a heart stopping moment I was afraid she had died, right up until I noticed the gentle rise and fall of her chest. I leant forwards, securing her in my arms before pulling her from the plug. By now, all around me, support personnel had arrived and where trying to take charge. One of them asked me to put her down but I refused, now that I knew she was safe, I would never let her go again.

My attention came back to her when her eyes snapped open, narrowing for a moment as she focused on my face…the next moment her arms were around me and she was holding me tightly, wanting oh so desperately to return her embrace I lowered her feet to the ground before sliding my arms securely around her waist. We stayed like that, taking comfort in each other's presence until a doctor arrived and insisted on checking her out. I adamantly refused to leave her side during the procedure and with some slight complaint he complied, examining her even as I retained a firm hold on her hand.

When at last he declared her free of contamination we were allowed to go, we only briefly returned to the compound, darting into the locker rooms to shower and change before going home. When we walked in the door we halted for only a moment to cast off our shoes before adjourning to my bedroom, once there she lay down on the bed. She looked up at me, saying nothing, her request made silently in her eyes. I leant down and kissed her, signalling my ascension before we allow the pent up passion to engulf us as we made love over and over again.

We I woke the next morning it was to a tangle of scents, the floral smell of her shampoo blended with the aftermath of our lovemaking. Looking onto the sleeping face of the girl beside me I final felt free, free of all the doubts that had plagued me for so long, finally free of the shackles of my past that have for too many years held me in that same dark place…she stirred slightly before waking, meeting my gaze with her own clear blue eyes. A smile spread across her lips as she moved across to kiss me, whispering words against my mouth.

"I love you my Shinji."

"And I you my Asuka."

We remained that way, bodies entangled in a lover's embrace until at last Misato standing at the door to my bedroom, demanding our presence in the living room, disturbed us. Knowing full well the lecture that awaited us we took our time, dressing slowly before exiting the room hand in hand and taking our seats across from Misato on the couch. She simply stared at us for a moment, her gaze flicking between the two of us and then down to our joined hands. I could see the conflict raging in her eyes, she knew as well as anyone the events of yesterday, yet she was still our guardian and that there were some things that must be done.

"The two of you…I am sure you are both aware of what you have done so I won't bother two waste time talking about it. I'm going straight to a chemist to get the 'morning after pill' for Asuka as well as some other things. You two behave while I'm gone, no sex in the meantime, understand?"

We both nodded, both more than a little surprised by her words. In truth, I had expected a long tirade about how stupid we had been but as ever Misato had shattered my expectations and left me lost for words. Asuka squeezed my hand, drawing my attention back to her, even as I turned to face her she covered my lips with her own and for a moment I was lost in another passionate kiss. We she pulled away I was still half in a daze, her words only just registering in my mind.

"Shinji…would you…when this is over…a child…"

As the words sank in I felt memories from a long, long time ago filter into my consciousness. Fragments of the few times I could remember being happy with my parents. In knew almost nothing of how to be a parent, even less of how to be a father since I had so little contact with my own. Deep in my heart I was afraid, afraid that the terrible sadness that had consumed my father, that had turned him into the empty shell that was Commander of Nerv, would one day be passed onto me and I would become that which I most hated and feared.

Asuka reached out and clasped my hand in hers, her warmth mixing with my own, reassuring me. I looked into her eyes, seeing my own hopes and fears reflected in those familiar blue orbs. I knew then that it didn't matter; so long as we were together we would get past it all. I kissed her again, blocking out all the fear, all the uncertainty in that perfect moment as our lips touched. We went no further, and when Misato returned we were still kissing, breaking contact when she coughed to signal that she had returned.

"Ok, Asuka you come with me. Shinji, you wait here."

Asuka did as she was told, following Misato into the bathroom. I simply remained on the couch, my thoughts to troubled to warrant turning on the TV. From here on in things would get more difficult, if more Angels come, I don't know that I can cope with her going out there again, the problem is; will she allow me to go in her place…I've almost died twice now, to me I don't think I would mind a third if it kept her away from the front lines yet, at the same time, I know what happened to me hurt her badly. We've gotten a lot closer since then, what would happen to her now if I managed to get myself killed…no, that's not something I want to think about because I know the answer all too well. She will follow me; follow me into the depths of hell.

When the two of them returned from the bathroom Misato's face was stern, she informed me that Asuka was not pregnant and that I was lucky this time. She also told me that if I was that stupid she would personally hand me over to the Commander to face his wrath. I was well aware of how my father would react to the loss of a pilot, sufficed to say he would be less than pleased. I swore to her on my mother's grave that Asuka and I would be careful, that nothing would happen until this was all over. Both women looked at me for a moment, appreciating the depth of my oath. Even if according to my father, it held no body, the grave was all I had left of my mother and to have made a promise on it meant it was one I would not fail to keep.

Misato nodded solemnly, accepting my words. The atmosphere calmed somewhat now that that declaration was made; falling into my normal routine I adjourned to the kitchen to prepare some breakfast for us all. To my surprise, Asuka followed me, when I fixed her with a questioning gaze she simply replied.

"I want to help."

Feeling both surprised and pleased I made my way over to the refrigerator, looking to see what was available after I had been away for so long. To my surprise the fridge was reasonably full, and not of instant meals as I had expected. There were sufficient ingredients to make the dish I had been planning. With a small smile, I began retrieving them from the fridge and setting them on the table. In the mean time Asuka pulled an apron that had been hanging by the entryway, then pulled up her hair before tying it with a red ribbon. It was then I noticed something important, for the first time in so long I noticed that the neural interface clips were no longer in her hair. She noticed this and self-consciously lifted a hand to her head, running her fingers gently through her long red hair.

"I took them out, that was the last time I plan on ever getting inside and Eva, from here on out you're on your own."

Despite the teasing tone in her voice there was seriousness beneath, I could tell that last encounter had affected her more than she was letting on, I could see the distant look in her eyes and the way her body shivered slightly. I vowed there and then that I would make sure she never had to experience such a nightmare again, I would finish the Angels that remained with my bare hands if required if only to keep her from reliving that pain. Forcing those thoughts down, I turned my attention to my task, slowly preparing the ingredients and directing Asuka to her tasks. I was shocked once again when she offered no argument, simply doing as I told her without complaint. This was certainly a development I could learn to enjoy, even if it only lasted during times spent in the kitchen.

We ate in silence, Asuka obviously distracted, wanting to tell Misato of her decision not to pilot any longer. I know it would be a major blow but after what happened I can understand why. At least from now on I won't have to worry if she isn't going to come back one of these times, even if I am going to have to fight for the both of us to defeat however many Angels remain…

"Misato?"

She looked up at Asuka, placing down the half empty can of Yebitsu.

"What is it Asuka?"

"I want to quit being a pilot."

"Oh, ok."

Misato started to chug her beer once again until Asuka's words finally filtered through her mind…a moment later I was being showered in beer.

"You what!"

"I don't want to be the Second Child any longer, I don't want to get in that thing ever again."

"What the hell are you talking about Asuka? As long as I've known you all you've ever talked about is being the number one pilot! Why do you want to stop now…it's because of Shinji isn't it?"

"What? No! If it were because of him then I would have quit after he came back from being trapped inside Unit-01. No, this is because of what happened during the last battle, after what I experienced I'm afraid to synch with my Eva again, I'm afraid that the nightmares will find me and that this time Shinji won't be there to save me when I get out."

Misato remained silent, her expression troubled. No doubt Asuka's words had bothered her yet at the same time I could tell she was considering something else, most likely what would happen if we were down a pilot.

"I can't promise anything Asuka but I'll talk with the Commander, ok?"

"Thank you Misato."

The two of them hugged briefly before Misato returned to her room to dress while Asuka informed me she was going to take a shower. Sighing, I looked down at Penpen.

"Looks like it's just you and me…I'll wash and you dry?"

My response was a 'wark' followed by the warm water penguin retreating to his refrigerator.

"Gee, thanks."

Throwing up my hands in defeat I gathered the dishes and placed them in the sink before filling it with warm water and starting the washing up.

With the school gone and practically all the other students either leaving or having left, we had pretty much nothing to do with ourselves. So, rather than sit around the apartment bored, Asuka and I went out for a walk around the city, or rather what remained after a good proportion was heavily damaged by Asuka's positron rifle blasts. To our good fortune, most of the shopping district remained intact, and, in a show of generosity and good will, I offered to take her shopping. This was met with a squeak of delight before the enthusiastic German girl grabbed my hand and quite literally pulled me through about a half dozen clothing stores.

Half an hour later, my hands were full of bags of clothing, some of which, surprisingly enough, was for me; Asuka had insisted that I wear something else sometimes other than my school uniform. I was eager to take a break, perhaps get some lunch as it was approaching midday. Asuka caved after I begged a little, allowing me to take her to one of the many restaurants that remained and treat her to a magnificent, if expensive, lunch together. It was as we were departing the restaurant that our phones went off, not hearing the sirens I wondered if it was really an Angel attack. Seeing as my hands were full Asuka answered hers instead.

"Hello? Oh, Misato. Yes, Shinji's with me. Nerv, right away? Ok, we'll head there now."

She put away her phone before turning back to me.

"You heard?"

I nodded.

"Good, then let's head over there now, Misato told me that she had some news about my request to resign from being a pilot."

This peaked my interest and so I followed her as quickly as I could, considering the fact I had bags in either hand, as she made a bee line for the closest entrance to Nerv. Once inside we travelled down various escalators until at last we reached the command centre where Misato had instructed us to meet. She was standing in her usual place, a boy with strange silver hair standing behind her, looking out at the cages. As we approached, he turned to face us and his red eyes, just like Rei's, surprised me. Misato paused for a moment to get our attention before making introductions.

"Shinji, Asuka, meet Kaworu Nagisa, the fifth child."

AN: Only another five or so to go now, sorry about the delay but life has been more difficult than usual and there has been my old favourite, the ever present writer's block, hence the Negima fiction. As for chapter 20…I don't know when, please be patient.

Thanks,


Hououza

Chapter preread by That Other Guy