EDGESHOT

"Did you really think I would be fooled by such a flimsy disguise?" Edgeshot leaned over a green toaster on the floor of his dojo and pointed both hands at his head. "Think Deku, think!"

"Um, sir?" one sidekick dressed as a ninja nervously cut in. "I don't think that's-"

"Even remotely subtle?" Edgeshot bellowed. "A stratagem with even the tiniest probability of success? You are absolutely right! And you, Deku, are a disgrace to this Agency and to the hero school that trained you!"

Two slices of bread popped out of the toaster, browned and crisped to perfection. Edgeshot took one and ran his finger along the top of the toasted bread.

"Buttered right out of the toaster. Do you take me for an idiot, Deku? You can't toast buttered bread! The oil would burn, the building would catch on fire, and the entire city would be ashes within the hour! Do you really expect such a lazy disguise to fool anyone?"

The sidekick gulped and tried again. "Um, sir? He's right behind-"

"Behind All Might in his ability to hide? An excellent jape, nameless sidekick!"

"My name's-"

"Unimportant! What matters is our cause. Our purpose! Our creed! We who watch over the city from the shadows, who root out evil in its darkened lairs so those who dwell in the light may sleep easily at night! Which, I might add, isn't possible if your idea of a disguise is a bright green toaster, completely devoid of manufacturer's information, lacks a dial to adjust the cooking settings, and doesn't spontaneously combust when you put buttered bread in it!"

The toaster popped again. The two slices of bread, one adorned with blackberry jam and the other spread with peanut butter, slammed together mid-air, split into triangles, and landed on a plate.

"Are you mocking me?" Edgeshot roared at the toaster. "Do you really expect anyone to believe that bread with jam and peanut butter on it can be toasted without leaving a single globule of burnt sugar or peanut matter on the heating elements? Let alone combine the two slices mid-air, split the bread so perfectly, or arrange the sandwich on a decorative plate?"

"Sir!" the sidekick yelled. "Just turn around!"

Edgeshot turned. "What am I supposed to see?"

"There! Behind the potted plant!"

Izuku stood behind a thin, reedy plant, plainly visible through the sparse vegetation. Edgeshot squinted and then huffed in surprise. "Well spotted, nameless sidekick. We should get that crack in the wall taken care of. Who knows what villainy could be lurking in there!"

The sidekick gaped like a fish out of water as Edgeshot went back to berating the toaster. This time, an entire roast chicken shot out the top.

Edgeshot threw up his hands. "That's it. I give up."

Once Edgeshot left the agency, the two huge eyes opened in the ceiling. The sidekick nearly fainted when the room asked, "Did I succeed? I thought I was very clever hiding as the entire building."

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