PI

"We could do a petting zoo?" Koda timidly suggested.

"Too much mess." Yaoyorozu struck it off the list. "Next?"

Mineta rushed up with a manic look in his eyes. "A mai-"

Tsuyu grabbed him with her tongue and dunked him into the trash-can. With her tongue lolling out, she said, "I need to gargle some mouth wash."

From the trash can, Mineta woozily said, "Worth it."

Tsuyu shuddered. "Better make that bleach."

Iida strode up with a fifty-page binder. "I propose-"

Yaoyorozu shoved the binder into Izuku's mouth. He choked on it for a moment before turning into a paper shredder. "Denied."

"But I didn't even-"

"Denied! Next?"

Kaminari swaggered up and put an elbow on the desk. "Momo, I know you and I have a special connection. We understand each other."

"I'm going to regret hearing you out, aren't I?"

"Of course not! Setting up a game arcade is the best idea ever. With, maybe, game consoles people have a hard time coming by? People would flock to us!"

"You just want a PS5, don't you?"

"Come on, you bought like thirty of them!"

"The whole bundle was on sale for a million dollars, of course I bought them. Next!"

Kirishima slapped both palms on the desk. As his palms were hardened, this cracked the wood. Aizawa stirred uneasily in his sleeping bag, but he didn't deign awaken. "Exercise equipment?"

"The liability insurance alone would put us over budget. Do you have any idea how many idiots would hurt themselves?"

"No pain no gain!"

"Thanks for proving my point. Next!"

Ojiro hesitated. "I suppose my martial arts dojo won't fly as well?"

"Absolutely not."

"What about dancing?" Mina asked. "That's way safer."

"Dancing, yes. A nightclub?"

"Where else would you dance, a ballroom?" she asked sarcastically.

"Of course," Yaoyorozu and Iida replied together. "That's where you're supposed to dance."

"Excuse me, Momo?" Ochako said. "Your rich is showing."

"I'm still not letting you do a thrift store."

"Come on!"

Bakugo strode up and slammed his palms on the desk. Between the cracks Kirishima made and the fact Bakugo's palms were coated in liquid explosive, the desk flew apart in a shower of splinters.

"I have the absolute perfect event for the festival."

"It's breaking robots, isn't it?"

"How did you know!" Bakugo roared. "Are you working with the machines?"

"Security!"

As Sato and Shoji dragged him away, Bakugo shouted, "You can silence me, but you can't-"

"My parents own the media, I can silence anybody. Next."

As Izuku walked up, Yaoyorozu held up a hand. "I don't want to hear it. It's approved."

"Really?"

"I heard everyone else, and it literally can't be any worse than them."

Three weeks later…

Kaminari scratched his head. "Next number's a… six! Right?"

"Nope. Four."

"Great, now I need to start over."

Mineta whispered in Yaoyorozu's ear, "Literally can't be worse, huh?"

She added four more digits and answered, "I'd sooner calculate all of pi than do any of your ideas."

498

On the bright side, Eri got to have apple pie.