AN: SUMMARY for those who skipped the violence. No warnings for this chapter.
After being taken to the Department of Mysteries, Penny begins undergoing some questionable, nightly tests of her expression, where Yaxley's unspeakables seem to be milling her for some magical manifestations of her expression. Penny comes to find all her letters are being monitored, leading Snape to write her in code and point her to Draco Malfoy as being a source of help, as Dumbledore's efforts have been stalled due to the fears surrounding another person rising like Grindelwald. Penny receives a letter from Draco, informing that Yaxley seems to be working with the MACUSA, who desire to use Penny to win an upcoming election. Finally, the MACUSA show themselves in a final set of experiments, where Penny comes to conclude that the essence of her expression is a life sucking force that is akin to death. While recovering from her torture, Lucius Malfoy visits Penny, saying Draco wrote to him, demanding he help release Penny and accusing her of blackmailing Penny because he is aware Draco is gay, even if he has not chosen to come out. Upon Lucius' departure, Penny finds herself alone, and wonders until she finds herself standing before the veil.
When she reaches out to move it aide, a voice makes it across the divide, whisper Equivalent Exchange. Penny realizes the veil wants something, likely a life, and concludes Yaxley was milling her for tokens to get through the veil without losing one's life. She turns to leave, not wanting to be anywhere near the veil and runs headlong into Yaxley, who has selected this moment to kidnap her and give her to the MACUSA, having a cover story in place.
Thanks to the help of Lucius Malfoy, Penny is saved by Tonks and Kingsley just before being lost forever. Fudge, embarrassed by the entire ordeal sends a very shaken Penny back to Hogwarts with Lupin.
The landing in Hogsemede was not pretty. As soon as Penny's feet slammed into the hard ground, she crumpled, Lupin reaching immediately to pull her to her feet. The world spun as Penny tried to focus on Lupin's worried features. He wrapped his arm around her waist and helped her walk up the path leading to Hogwarts. Penny was thankful not only for his steadying hand, but his warmth. She was terribly under-dressed for a trudge through the snow. The ugly grey sweatpants she was given in the Department of Mysteries were immediately saturated by it, and she wore nothing but a t-shirt up top.
Lupin pulled her close and wrapped his robe around her as far as it would stretch. She shivered for a moment, but then was hit by the wave of warmth that radiated from him. Penny always wondered if it had something to do with being a werewolf or if she was just a very cold person. Either way, she decided it would be rude to ask him.
Crunching through the snow, Penny admired the tranquility of the path that led to Hogwarts. The snow lay in perfect white blankets over the grass that had been vibrantly green the day she left. The wind creaked through the Dark Forest, blew across the lake and burned Penny's cheek. It brought a great sense of relief, filling her lungs with freedom, and making her feel as though she may burst.
She'd really made it, she was home, never to go back to that awful place again. Yaxley was either arrested or in hiding. The thought brought a scowl of satisfaction to her face, Penny had not known what hate felt like until meeting that evil creature. There was nothing more vile that Penny could imagine than he. Pushing the thought aside, Penny focused again on the beauty around her, Hogwarts castle looming in the distance, full of excitement, love, and safety. Harry was only 20 minutes away, she could feel him, though it seemed he was not yet aware of her presence. Penny preferred it this way, for all the happiness being back gave her, she dreaded the moment she would reach Dumbledore's office and be asked to recount the events of the Department of Mysteries.
The reluctance didn't come from a place of shame, but utter disgust and guilt. It did not matter that her abusers seemed to revel in their torment of her, it was more what her magic produced that bothered her. The little red eyes that pleaded with Penny haunted her dreams, waking her with a cold sweat each night. She shuddered, causing Lupin to look down at her.
"I know it's cold, but can we stop for a moment?" Lupin asked.
Penny turned to face him, arms wrapped around herself. He looked down at her shaking frame, unclipped his robe and wrapped it around her.
"Thanks."
"Penny, if there is any detail of your experience you do not feel comfortable speaking about when we reach the castle, you are under no obligation to share it. I will not let anyone force you to relive something you are not ready to share. If you need time, feel as though you aren't ready to go back to classes, do not hesitate to tell me. If I have to sleep on my couch for a month so you can get away, I'll do it, but please," he said, taking her cold hand into his "just tell me what you need to get through this,"
His brown eyes were glassy looking down at her. It made Penny sad knowing the sight of her made him this upset. All she'd ever wanted was to see that wide smile looking back at her, craved making him proud of her. Lupin always made the world feel lighter and the sky appear more brilliant. The weight he held now would cripple her, but she did not let it. Rather, knowing what lengths he was willing to go to support her made Penny feel less alone in her struggle, he was the closest thing to a parent Penny had.
"I guess what bothered me most in the Department of Mysteries wasn't what they were doing to me, it was coming to realize I understood very little about myself. For most of my life I've been Harry Potter's sister or Lily and James' daughter, but who is Penny? I think I'm afraid to find out what was different at Hogwarts while I was gone. . ." Penny replied, glancing at the castle behind him.
His brows furrowed, Penny found the look made his features more handsome. She always liked the way his face crinkled in concentration when he was lost in thought, especially when he was considering his response to something she said. He was very unlike Snape in this regard, who generally allowed his emotions to govern his mouth.
"You are so extraordinary and. . .rather absurd, Penny," Lupin sighed, running his hand through his hair. He paused for a moment, looking toward the sky before continuing, "I know who Penny is, she never fails to surprise and impress me with her resilience. I trust the answer to your question is not one to be afraid of because yours is an absence that is impossible to ignore, and this I know for a fact. But you'll see for yourself," he finished, grinning at her skeptical brow.
"You are forever the cheesiest man I know," said Penny, grabbing a lump of snow and throwing it at his face.
It felt like the right thing to do, he had overcome her with emotions and Penny did not like not knowing what to say, but his words buried their way into her heart. If only everything was as simple as Lupin made it feel.
"And you are the most emotionally evasive girl I know," he teased.
And then he reached down and packed a pile of snow threateningly.
"I was only joking!" Penny yelled, running away from Lupin, regretting her decision to start the snowball fight.
He ran after her and caught her quickly because Penny unable to breathe properly due to how hard she was laughing. Swiveling to protect her face, she tripped, plopped face down into the snow and then rolled over. Lupin descended to his knees and pushed Penny's hands aside.
"I'M SORRY" she pleaded.
"Well I'm not!" he said, and then crumbled the snowball over her head.
"That's cold," she said, spitting snow out of her mouth between laughs.
"Snow generally is," he laughed, wiping her face with his large hand.
"I never knew an old man could be so ruthless," she said darkly, sitting up.
"Old! Keep the cheek up and I'll be forced to get another snowball," he said, pulling her to her feet.
"Alright, truce!"
Looking satisfied, he pulled out his wand and dried her clothing.
"That's useful, I'll have to remember it."
"We better get going, or they might worry."
Penny nodded and the two of them walked and laughed for the next twenty minutes until they made it outside of the double doors. Penny removed Lupin's cloak, took a deep breath and begged the heavens for the Entrance Hall to be empty. Miraculously, they did not meet a single student on their way to Dumbledore's office. Lupin gave her a comforting squeeze of the hand when they stopped just outside the door and took the lead by knocking twice and pushing the door open before being invited.
Inside, Dumbledore sat at his desk, Snape glowering at the window just behind him, his eyes snapped to Lupin and his lip curled into a sneer.
"Albus, Professor Snape," Lupin said, before stepping aside to usher Penny into a chair.
Penny moved forward tentatively, looking only at the dark eyes. The contempt quickly faded from his features as he looked over Penny, something akin to anger replacing it. Of course the infuriating man could show no emotion at Penny's return. He'd refused when she left and in her letter, so why had she deluded herself into thinking a heartfelt reunion would be waiting for her. Even-still, when his dark eyes finally met her green ones, Penny couldn't help the lopsided smile that formed across her face. Her heart thumped unexpectedly and for the first time in a long time, things felt right. Penny was back at Hogwarts, and nothing between her and Snape had changed, even if he'd been deflective his eyes didn't lie-he was happy to see her.
"Remus, Penny, please sit and let me offer you a cup of tea, it's quite chilly out there today," Dumbledore said pleasantly, observing Penny through his half-moon spectacles.
"Thank you Professor," said Penny, accepting the warm cup.
"Cornelius was tight lipped, Albus. It seems Yaxley was tipped off, he was nowhere to be found. But Kingsley is head of the investigation," Lupin began, Dumbledore nodding as he spoke.
"I expected as much. I trust Kingsley will locate him soon enough," Dumbledore replied, watching Penny.
Feeling uncomfortable under his gaze, Penny sipped more tea, only to find all three watching her when she looked up.
"Penny, I think you know I will, most unkindly, ask you to tell us what transpired in the Department of Mysteries. But before I do so, would you like me to send for Harry? He does not yet know of your return."
"I-uhh, is it alright if we wait to call him? I'd prefer to speak to him privately," Penny said to her cup.
Lupin grasped her hand and gave her an encouraging smile. Feeling the courage swell in her chest, she sat up straighter. Snape's features caught her attention, he was looking at their intertwined hands with the utmost disgust, his features sour.
Dumbledore smiled kindly at Penny, "Whatever you wish. As you may already know, we got word from Lucius that it was imperative to remove you from custody. He even made a formal complaint on your behalf," said Dumbledore, eyes sparkling.
"Tonks made mention of it after they stopped the MACUSA from taking me with them. I am greatly in debt to Draco." Penny said, glancing at Snape for confirmation.
He titled his head ever-so-slightly, confirming Penny's hunch that Snape had been involved in nudging Draco and possibly Lucius.
"Indeed, and what a wonderful testament to the merits of inter-house friendships. But alas, now I have the unfortunate task of asking you what led to the events of today," he said, his expression solemn.
Staring at the point just above Dumbledore's head, Penny explained how she started having nightly visitors, the three unspeakables, who attached the three devices to her, dragged her to the never-ending room and the way she was forced to reach out to the evil magic of the cursed items. Lupin's face features darkened when she described the choking sensation that forced her to respond, and how, when it did respond, it produced the pearls.
"And they used only the three devices each night? On the same hand?" Dumbledore inquired.
"Yes, sir."
Dumbledore nodded at Snape who swept around the table and extended his arm expectantly. Penny offered her left hand which he clasped in both of his. With the contact of Snape's cool skin, Penny's whole body tensed, the familiar jolt of electricity pulsed from the place his skin met hers. He peered at her through his eyelashes with a knowing stare. Overly conscious of the others watching them, Penny did her best to act natural. His thumbs swirled over her bruise and she winced. Looking back at her wrist he flipped her hand over and examined it while muttering under his breath. Then, without warning, he stepped up beside her and swept her hair away from her shoulder, and kneeled down to look at her neck. His fingers were gentle at first, but then he pressed unkindly, causing Penny to cough several times.
"My throat is still sore from what they lodged in my mouth today," Penny muttered, rubbing the side of her neck when Snape removed his hand.
"Your right hand is your wand hand, correct?" said Snape, considering her.
"I suppose. But I imagine they could have used either hand. The point was to ensure my magic only left in the direction they wanted, otherwise they'd loose the expression to other atoms. I hypothesized the pearls were the physical representation of the power I expelled," Penny said in a disgruntled tone.
Of course he'd rather torment her more than simply ask her thoughts on the topic, it was irritating they all assumed she was an unobservant dunce. Snape's eyebrows disappeared and he turned to Dumbledore, who looked amused.
"As astute as ever," he said, gesturing for her to continue.
The words flooded out of her until she got to the small red eyes staring at her. Her voice caught in her throat and she floundered for words to describe what transpired.
"It consumed the rabbit's life." Dumbledore said in a gentle voice. It was not a question, his knowing eyes searching her thoughtfully.
Penny nodded.
"I imagine it was quite gruesome. Was there anything left behind?"
"It was like it was encased with the substance the pearls were made of. . ." Penny trailed off, lost in thought.
"Those with power too often believe those beneath them are of lesser value and feel validated in committing such cruel acts. I would encourage you, Penny, to remember you were as much a victim as the rabbit, and to allot responsibility accordingly,"
She looked at Lupin who got out of his chair to pace behind Penny, agitation clear on his features. Leaning against the window again, arms crossed, Snape all but rolled his eyes at Lupin. Turning back to Dumbledore, Penny went on, explaining the strange encounter with Lucius, leaving the details about Draco as bare as possible. Glancing at Snape, she could see his calculating eyes scrutinizing her, searching for the information he believed she was hiding. Pushing it to the back of her mind, she plowed out, stopping only at the veil.
"Death Chamber? That's a curious name for a room," Dumbledore said, his voice no longer soft.
Lupin stopped pacing and was glued to the spot watching Penny.
"I gave it that name because death waits behind that veil," Penny said, startling herself with her own certainty.
"What made you conclude that," said Snape, his dark eyes narrowed.
"When I reached for the veil something made it through to this side, and when it moved the veil I could feel the other-side. It was like the rabbit, that feeling is unmistakable. All the murmuring is hiding the silence."
"What do you mean by 'made it to this side," said Dumbledore, his features grave.
"The murmuring was gibberish, but just before I pushed the veil aside, I was able to make out something. The moment I saw the other-side I heard someone whisper, equivalent exchange ," said Penny, shaking her head out of the trance like memory.
Snape made a violent motion in the corner, but when Penny looked at him he'd regained his composure. Turning to Dumbledore, Penny saw something flash through his eyes. His face looked severe, as though what Penny had uttered was a horrible obscenity. But a moment later, he too had gathered his composure.
"What did those words mean to you, Penny?" Dumbledore said, leaning back in his chair like an exhausted old man would.
Penny felt suddenly reluctant to share her suspicions about the peals and veil, which would likely lead to her being forced to divulge the encounter in her head with Tom where she'd first learned of Equivalent Exchange. There were enough stress lines on all of their faces without Penny burdening them with that information. She was tired, tired of these explanations. She just wanted a bed and her brother. Clearing her mind of the guilt, she decided to withhold the information.
"It made me afraid, so I turned to run away, and that's when Yaxley found me."
It wasn't a lie. Lupin looked from her to Dumbledore, whose face eased slightly. He seemed satisfied to leave the topic at that, but Lupin looked on the verge of objecting, while Snape simply stared out at the darkening sky.
With little energy left, Penny finished the rest of the story which caused Lupin to kneel down before her.
"I know it was hard Penny, but it's important that you shared it. It will help the ministry make a case against Yaxley," he said, brushing her cheek tenderly.
Penny nodded, unable to form any more words, her voice ragged from the days' events.
"You have shown more bravery than many full grown wizards, Penny. You rose to the occasion spectacularly, but you are safe now, so I think it is time for you to be allowed some much needed rest. If you would not mind, I'll have Severus escort you to the Hospital Wing, there are a few things I wish to speak with Remus about," said Dumbledore, sitting up straight again.
Rubbing her eyes, Penny nodded and looked at Lupin.
"You won't leave while I'm asleep will you?"
"I wouldn't dream of it, I still owe you some butterbeers," he said with a warm smile.
Kissing his forehead, Penny followed an angry-looking Snape from the room, watching her exchange with Lupin seemed to irritate him as much as when she sat beside Harry. He swept from the room and down the corridor without so much as confirming Penny was following.
"You don't get to ignore me," Penny said to his back.
"I'm hardly ignoring you, I'm taking you to the Hospital Wing," he said tersely.
"Didn't you get my letter?"
"Of course I got your letter, Ms. Potter." said Snape, rounding on her.
"Did you read it?" she pressed
"What else does none do with a letter?"
"Reply," she said in an accusatory tone.
He seemed to flounder for a moment, his mouth opening and shutting several times as she waited, hands on her hips.
"I was busy," he hissed.
"Alright, go on and show me what you learned right now, then,"
"What I learned," he repeated in a dangerously low tone.
"Did I stutter?" Penny said, cooly.
Snape's lips disappeared, his eyes cold with fury. He looked mutinous, but Penny did not care. She reckoned the odds of him blowing up were low, so she pushed the bluff, crossing her arms in defiance. He knew what he'd done, and he would make amends or suffer the consequences.
"Do not presume I will let you get away with such insolence just because I feel sorry for you," he spat.
"That's rich. If you read my letter, why didn't you respond? Was something confusing for you, should I clarify?" said Penny, disregarding his threat.
"I don't need you to clarify anything for me, " Snape said through gritted teeth.
Feeling lightheaded again, Penny perched herself against the nearest window sill. "What's the problem then? I never took you for a slower learner," she mused, looking him up and down. He seemed to shift uncomfortably under her graze, bringing a smirk to her face that only served to make the man more irate. "Chop chop, I don't have all day,"
"I'm going to wring your-" he said furiously, advancing on her.
Penny stood up abruptly and strode the other half of the distance between them, stopping only to glare up into his reddening features.
"My what? My neck? Must be a Death Eater thing, because Yaxley did the same thing every night for the last month," Penny said, her voice shaking.
"I-that's not what I meant," he said quietly, the color leaving his face.
He looked down at her neck and reached out almost as if he intended to touch it, but seemed to think better of it.
"Isn't it?"
Dark eyes locked onto green ones and then, most surprisingly, he was caressing her cheek much in the same way Lupin had done. He watched her features soften beneath him, the lines of regret and sorrow becoming more prominent on his face. He was exceedingly gentle, but his eyes were not distant like they normally were. He was looking at Penny, not some distant memory. It made her wonder what it was that he, a broken girl or someone he'd missed?
"Watch out Severus, your emotions are showing. You wouldn't want me to find out how much you missed me," she said, a grin twisting across her mouth.
His features contorted in anger at her words, giving her the utmost satisfaction. Pushing past him she continued on her way down the corridor.
"Potter!" he yelled, vehemently.
"Don't act like I didn't just do you a favor, you deserved that, but it's good to be back. I missed that stupid look on your face," she said, rounding on him with a gloating smirk.
Before he could respond, she turned on her heel and darted down the hall, half fearful of his wrath, half choking with laughter.
As cruel as she'd been, his features didn't lie, he liked the way his name sounded when she said it, and that pleased her.