BIZARRO

"This unit has an indignant proclamation." Bakugo's hand shot loud and tall into the air. "The unit seated directly beside me, in row three, column four, featuring a garishly realistic set of hair, skin lacking any trace of fabrication or chemical synthesis, and a being of character completely antithetical to the robotic supremacy that governs this planet, is in fact, an organic being. A human!"

Eighteen other heads swiveled to peer at Izuku. Izuku nervously rubbed the back of his head and said, "Uhm… I'm a robot, like you guys? I mean, I was designed to look and act like a human for infiltration purposes."

Katsuki's arm turned into a knife and sliced Izuku's skin. Izuku yelped and covered the wound. "Do you all see? It bleeds. It feels pain. It is human!"

"Of course I feel pain! I wouldn't be much of an infiltration unit if I suffered a cut and did not have an overwhelming distress response because of it! You know how fragile and weak humans are."

"Then what about this?" The class gasped and dove for cover as Bakugo brought a magnet. "I hold in my hand the ultimate destroyer of machine-kind. It gravitates towards us with malicious magnetism, and one touch of its unyielding grip can warp metal, corrupt data, and blue-screen even the most formidable of hard drives. And yet, behold!"

Bakugo pressed the neodymium magnet against Izuku's face. It fell to the floor, quivered, then slammed in between Mineta's legs with the force of an arrow.

"I would feel excruciating pain if I had any capacity to feel such," Mineta remarked calmly.

"And yet," Bakugo said triumphantly, "It did not stick to Izuku! What do you say to that, human?"

"I was made with non-ferromagnetic materials, and my internal components are adequately shielded against magnetic interference."

"Sounds like something a human would say!"

Robo-Aizawa got up from his portable charging pod. "There is a very simple way to resolve this. Midoriya, if you would."

Aizawa handed him a tablet. A prompt on it asked him to identify a six-letter phrase. Izuku looked at it, then handed it back.

"Nope. Can't read it."

"There, you see?" Aizawa asked. "A robot."

"It is only pretending it can't read it!" Bakugo seethed. "It is a human!"

"It is an infiltration unit, and your paranoia algorithms are calibrated incorrectly. Please take your seat."

A portal opened overhead. Another Bakugo and Izuku tumbled out of it. Bakugo dusted himself off and looked around the room. His eyes met his doppelganger's.

"Robot!" "Human!"

While the rest of the alternate reality classroom fell into chaos, Izuku went over to Izuku and asked, "You are me?"

"Yes," Izuku replied. "I am me."

"Understood. Would you care to partake in material libations? I am most eager to try the local precious minerals."

"I am an infiltration unit. I am calibrated to only intake human biomatter."

"Ah. Pizza then?"

"Pizza sounds great."

489

That's right, this is the bizarro reality! Down is up, right is left, All Might is a competent teacher, Aizawa gets a reasonable amount of sleep, and Nezu doesn't play mind-games with his staff and students.

Also, this implies the existence of a universe where Izuku is hiding among robots in robot school by pretending to be an ultra-realistic T-800 and I am here for it.