--Snail's Pace--

Thus by chance should I stumble upon a way to find you

Chapter Seventeen

The plane trip back to New York was slow and silent. Tohru sat by herself – holding the blue dress. Kagura sat supportively beside her yet motionless.

Tohru was unable to make herself stay at Shigure's house so she stayed with Kagura once more. Her small apartment seemed welcoming compared to everything else and she was grateful when Kagura said to treat it as her own home. Yet there seemed to be some distance between them. Tohru knew that the zodiac boar was probably angry at her for running off with Yuki. She'd made so many mistakes in the past few days and she felt so confused. Not only had she hurt Kyou and Yuki but she had hurt and offended Kagura as well. How many others would she annoy before the torment ended?

Oh Mom… what should I do?

She called Hana and Uo. They were more than supportive and would have rushed over to be with her straight away had they not been busy with their own jobs. Tohru knew they didn't have the money to just fling around on plane tickets. She didn't want to trouble them as much as she'd troubled Yuki and Kyou.

'Tohru?' Kagura was standing in the doorway. She looked worried. The painful expression on Tohru's face made her feel sad as well. 'I'm serving dinner now. Are you - ?'

'No thank you.'

'But you have to eat!'

'I'll be all right. Thanks for everything.'

Tohru stood up and grabbed her coat from the end of the bed. She slung her arms into the sleeves effortlessly and made her way towards the door, passing silently passed Kagura.

'Where are you going?'

'I'm going to ask Kyou if he'll go on a date with me.'

'You chose Kyou?' Kagura said hopefully. Tohru left without saying anything; and Kagura sat down on the edge of the couch. There she would stay until Tohru came home later that night.

Tohru hadn't really chosen anyone yet. She wanted to sort out her feelings for the boys and she felt that she could best do that by talking to the both of them. She decided to start with Kyou; since she knew she'd hurt him terribly. Tohru couldn't get the scene at the hotel out of her mind.

While she waited patiently at the restaurant she ordered a small salad for herself and a fish platter for Kyou when he arrived. The ambiance in the room was nice. The walls were painted crimson and a rose print, like a creeping vine, was fashioned in each corner. A large glowing fish tank which spread from one side of the room to the other sent rivulets of light sparkling across the floor. Tohru sighed.

'Hi.'

She looked up expectantly when she heard the voice; but was started to see that it wasn't Kyou at all who had come to meet her. She was looking up into the face of Yuki. He was wearing a casual white suit.

'Kyou didn't want to come. So I came instead, Miss Honda. I'm really sorry about that.'

Tohru shuffled uncomfortably. 'No, it's all right. I guess Kyou is a lot madder than I thought. He sounded upset on the phone.'

'I wanted to talk to you, Miss Honda. Are you feeling all right? This must be difficult for you.'

Yuki was being so nice to her. Tohru found it hard to look him in the eye as he sat down and she began speaking. She told him everything that had happened between her and Kyou and how she had slowly fallen in love with him just as much as she had Yuki. Everything with Yuki was always very relaxed and easy-going even though he did have a lot of media around him and lived the life of a movie star. With Kyou it was different – he was always on the edge and overflowing with electricity and fire. The difference between them was large; but Tohru couldn't decide which she loved more.

'Maybe I should just go home,' Tohru finally said. 'I'd just end up hurting one of you anyway.'

'You can do whatever you want to do,' Yuki said plainly. There was a smile on his face. 'I enjoy being with you and I knew that there was something between us right from the very day I met you. There was something amazing there yet maybe neither of us knew quite what it was. Perhaps the strong connection I felt towards you was the similarities which could form an excellent and honest friendship; but more than anything I hope that the connection was love. I want to be with Miss Honda; but I won't dislike you or berate you if you choose Kyou. You're happiness is the most important thing to me. I don't feel any happiness radiating from you right now. It makes me somewhat guilty, Miss Honda.'

'No, No, it's not your fault Yuki! It's my entire fault; this whole situation is my fault!' Her eyes were full of tears. 'Thank you for saying such nice things to me. You're so nice.'

'I try to be.'

'I think it comes naturally with you.'

'I'm actually just acting.'

'That comes naturally too then!'

'You give out compliments way to much.'

'To people who deserve them!'

That night they parted ways on good terms; both with a smile on their face. Yet Tohru didn't feel like she had come any closer to her final decision. In fact, she felt even more confused. Yuki was so nice to her. It was hard to not turn around and simply choose him right then and there for what he had said to her. He genuinely cared about her and could express that with the proper words.

As Tohru walked back to Kagura's apartment that night there was still a flash of pink sky in the distance. A solitary star could be seen between the slightly parted clouds. It was blinking soundlessly at her; and Tohru felt that it was blessing her. It was hoping she would make the right decision. As Tohru thought that; she was also thinking about Yuki and how lovely and kind he was.

She couldn't get his face out of her head for the remainder of the night.

And Kyou would answer none of her calls.

It's not like anyone actually looks forward to this fic anymore. I feel the need to finish it though before I move on with some other works I have in mind.