I walked slowly through the entrance doors to the dorm I would be staying in for the following year. I clenched the black strap to the back pack that was flung over my shoulder. I was nervous. I was nervous about living with a complete and total stranger. I was praying to God that A: my room mate wouldn't be some horny, jockstrap guy and B: that it wouldn't be some horny, self-destructive or a self-centered girl. I had enough people in my life that were horny, jockstrap, self-centered, self-destructive people. I didn't need any more of them.
I walked slowly through the entrance hall, taking in everything and everyone that passed me by. I had decided to go to a school that was completely dedicated to "the arts," so it was no surprise to me when my ears were filled with about 10 million different songs at once. It was also no surprise when many different peoples filled the collage dorm. There were people covered in piercings and tattoos, people still "sporting" the 80's and 90's look, and then there were normal enough people.
I went to my right and started up the stairs, heading toward my dorm room. I had been here before to explore the campus, trying to figure out where everything was. I wanted to make things a little easier for when I arrived and had to walk my way through the "madness." Nothing bothered me about this place so far, the only thing that I was concerned about at all was who my room mate was going to be.
When I reached the top landing of the stairs, on the second floor, I went down the hall to the left. The top of the building was more crowded than the first floor. I could barely make my way through the sea of people that were all carrying at least one huge bag filled with crap, just like myself.
As I made my way to where my dorm was, there were three types of music blaring into my ears, mixing in an interesting way in my head. From the door to the right I could hear heavy metal blaring. Now, don't get me wrong. I don't mind heavy metal. In fact, there are quite a few heavy metal bands I am very into. I just don't think I could handle it all the time. From the door to the left I could hear hip-hop/rap blaring. I didn't mind that type of music either. It was very good to dance to, but that's all it's good for, in my opinion. Luckily, my dorm room was the door in the middle of the wall, and what seemed like "fun" music was blaring from the room.
I came closer to the room. The music coming from it was some band doing an impression/cover of the song "Where Is the Love?" It sounded really funny, which made me at ease. Maybe my new room mate was easy going and fun. If that was the case, I didn't even really care what sex they were.
I walked into the room and dropped my black duffle bag inside, near the front door. I was brought to face a young woman who was having fun dancing around to her "fun" music while unpacking.
She seemed to be about as tall as I was, maybe a few inches taller. She had dark brown, almost black hair that was slowly falling from the bun it was put up in as she danced and unpacked to her music. She wore a tight green t-shirt that had the word "Fender" across it in black letters; that gave me the idea that she might be here for "advancing" her musical skills. The black, lose, faded, ripped jeans she wore hung low off her hips as if they would fall off of her any minute. And the shoes she wore were black etnies, slightly matching her clothes.
She noticed me a few seconds after I took in her appearance and she began to take in mine. She walked a few steps infront of her, to my left, and lowered her music and walked toward me, smiling. She extended her hand out to shake mine, and I shook her hand gratefully, noticing her bright hazel eyes. "She seems friendly enough" I thought.
"I'm Sara," She said, her voice rolling off her tongue in a calm way, "Sara Simpson."
I smirked at her name. It just sounded funny. "I'm Ashley Davies" I said as she released my hand from her grip.
"So, you're my new room mate" Sara said smiling, walking over to the right wall where a black leather couch was placed against the wall, and sat down.
"Room 202 right?" I asked as I kicked my duffle bag into the room farther and sat down on the black leather couch that was leaned up against the far wall of the room.
"Yup" She said smiling, her eyes seemed to be examining me in some way.
"Then yes, I am your new room mate" I said as I relaxed into the comfy leather of the couch.
"Alright, I'd like to tell you now that you have my sympathy for having to live with me for a hole year. Oh, that sounds like some harsh punishment" She said laughing at herself, making me smile. "I do pick up after myself. I always do my share of the work. But I can be quite . . . what's the word?" She asked herself, her eyes still on me but not concentrating on me. "I can be quite boisterous."
I laughed at her. This girl's presence made me feel so comfortable. "That's alright. I'll hold nothing against you."
"Score!" She said as she raised her hand in the air and brought it back down.
"Though I think it's fair that I warn you about myself" I said, knowing I could be a handful.
"Feel free to, but I wouldn't hold anything against you anyway. I'm more forgiving than I'd like to be" She said smiling as she put her feet on top of the wooden table that was placed in between the two couches, making herself more comfortable.
"Good to know, I'll try not to take advantage of that" I said smiling, also making myself more comfortable by placing my feet on top of the wooden table.
"Much obliged."
"But, I've had . . . ummm . . . serious problems that sometimes I find very tempting to do when I'm depressed enough"I told her, a smile still on my face but my voice sounding sad.
"Alright, you don't need to get detailed. I get the picture. Self destructive?" She asked, her smile more sympathetic than happy and free going like it had been.
"Yeah" I said more sadly than I would have liked.
"That's okay. I can be too. So, let's lay down some rules" She said, trying to brighten the mood.
"Alright" I said as she made me feel comfortable once again.
Sara removed herself from her sitting position and walked into one of the rooms, the one she seemed to have claimed for herself. She came out with a giant erasable board and a few markers. She sat back down and put the giant board on the wooden table, gesturing for me to sit up. I sat up and watched as she wrote in red "Rules and Regulations for Dorm Room 202!" I laughed lightly at the corniness before she began to discuss the rules with me.
"Okay, rule number one: Respect everyone while you are in this room!" She wrote down, looking at me for approval. I nodded in agreement and she continued. "Rule number two: Consult your room mate before doing anything major to/with the dorm room." She looked at me again and I nodded my head in agreement.
"Just keep going, I'll interject if I don't like anything" I told her, trusting her judgement of rules.
"Cool" She said as she put her full attention back on the board.
After about thirty minutes of Sara's hard thinking, we had a set of rules for the room. Once we (she) were finished, she hung it up on the wall, next to our "too big for a dorm" refrigerator. They read:
Rules and Regulations for Dorm Room 202!
1) Respect EVERYONE while you are in this room!
I don't care if you're arch rivals! RESPECT EVERYONE IN THIS ROOM PUNK!
2) Consult your room mate before doing anything major to/with the dorm room!
Such as rearanging, throwing parties, redecorating, etc.
3) Respect the space of the other room mate!
Don't invaded their personal space ... or else!
4) Pick up after yourself! Don't be a dirt bag! :O
You clog the toilet, you clean it! You make dirty dishes, you clean it! PUNK!
5) If you bring home a "Special Friend" put a sign on the front door of the room and the door to your room! (NO ONE WANTS TO WALK IN ON SOMEONE DOING THE DIRTY DEED!)
Put a hair band on the door nob, or a tie, or a shirt, or just out a sign on it that says "DOING THE DEED! GO AWAY PERVERT! etc.
I laughed as I looked at the sign. It had Sara's personality written all over it, literally. Well, what I could tell was her personality anyway. I was still siting down on the couch, relaxing. Sara stood infront of the sign, examining it.
"I feel like I'm in grade school again" Sara said as she laughed, returning to her earlier seat.
"I have some questions" I stated. I was quite curious about some things. "Why do we have such nice furniture? I mean, no dorm room has leather couches, or a huge fridge."
"Well, ya see, that's all my doing" Sara said smiling, holding up her hands as if she were caught for a crime. "There wasn't even a couch in here, but I changed that!" She said proudly, smiling in accomplishment. "See, my family owns a chain of furniture/appliance stores located in California, Nevada, New Mexico, Organ, New Jersey, New York, and Texas. I asked my loving father for some furniture. He gladly obliged. He even gave discounts on furniture to any students who were going to this school. All because of me!" She stated proudly again in a childish manner, making me laugh again.
"Okay, now I understand."
"Did you leave anyone behind?" Sara asked me randomly, automatically bringing memories of her into my head.
"Did you?" I asked, wanting to avoid the subject as long as I possibly could.
"I asked first!" She wined, but gave in. "Yes, her name's Sheila. She's quite harry, with blonde hair, and likes to lick people a lot. She walks on four paws . . . "
"I mean a person" I said laughing, noticing how she was avoiding the subject as well.
I became shocked when her eyes turned deep shades of brown and yellow. Her smile was still plastered on her face, but her eyes were seriously betraying the lie she was trying to portray.
"Yes" Sara said, her voice almost sound remorseful. "I left a mess behind" She said as she rose from her seat and walked over to the fridge.
She took a water bottle from the fridge and began to drink it as if she were dehydrated. With only half of the water bottle left, she sat back down in her seat. She was still smiling but her eyes shone with pain.
"See, I was . . . am in love with my best friend Chelsea" She began, not even caring if the fact that she was in love with someone of the same sex bothered me; it truly did not bother me. "I've been in love with her for as long as I can remember. We've been friends since the second grade, and I can swear to you I've loved her that long. When I was about fifteen, I realized that guys weren't the only sex I was attracted to. There were numerous things I could point out to why I was, but Chelsea was one of the main reasons; I know that to be a fact. And, one day I just told her. I couldn't hold it in anymore. She respected my feelings but said she didn't feel the same way. I understood, and I was glad she still remained to be my best friend."
I smiled at her, a smile of sympathy. I knew the agnizing pain of holding in your feelings for someone. Luckily for me, she felt the same way.
"I sorta gave up on her. Well, at least on the thought of having an intimate relationship with her. So, I let my heart open up to the idea of loving someone else, and I fell in love." Sara laughed, I guess she was getting to what she considered a "funny" part of this story of her love life. "The kicker is, I fell in love with my other best friend, Steven. To add to that, Chelsea and Steven had been a couple at one period of time, and they were really into each other. Oh, the irony" Sara said, cracking a joke at her own pain.
I shook my head and smiled for her benefit. "We'll get along just fine" I thought. "We both seem to hide our feelings."
"I told Steven how I felt, not caring if it bothered Chelsea. By the time I told Steven, I was seventeen and desperate for someone to return the love I held in my heart. Luckily, Steven felt the same way. I was lucky on another account as well; Chelsea didn't care. That relieved me so much. No matter how much I deny it, it would have upset me if she wasn't okay with it; for many reasons. Everything was going great, but then Chelsea came out."
I laughed at that. It may have been inappropriate, but I laughed. It was so ironic how Sara's love life seemed to have turned out. She smiled at me, lightly laughing as well.
"I'm sorry" I said. She nodded and continued.
"That really screwed with my head and heart" Sara said, looking at me with such sadness held in her eyes. "I mean, I loved Steven, don't think I didn't. I would die for him. It's just that . . . Chelsea . . . means more, if that's even possible. And, just knowing she was into girls gave me hope. It also, somehow ... made me want her more. I felt . . . dirty and disgusting because I was dating Steven but dreaming about Chelsea. So I broke up with him, unexpectedly. It hurt me just as much as it hurt him, but I needed to try with Chelsea. I needed to. I wouldn't rest until I knew if I had a chance."
I understood her. I understood how she felt. If Sara loved Chelsea just as much as I loved . . . love her, then I knew exactly what she was going through; to a t.
"I told her that I still felt the same way a few months before graduation. And the way she smiled at me after I confessed myself told me everything. Next thing I knew, she was my girlfriend; I couldn't have been happier."
"That sounds familiar" I thought to myself as memories of her came flooding into my mind. "Oh, how familiar . . . "
"But, like everything good in my life, it all burned up in flames. Steven wasn't stupid. He knew why I broke up with him after he sat down and thought it through. He became angry. I don't blame him. I would have too. But he . . . let's just say he went too far" Sara said, pain written on her face, instead off just in her eyes. "By the end of that summer, I wasn't Chelsea's girlfriend, not even her friend. And it was all my doing. I punished myself for what . . . happened. I took a break from . . . life. I spent a whole year traveling to every place I could while everyone I knew went of to collage; it was my escape in a way. I enjoyed traveling place to place. It was relaxing to me. But, I wanted to go to collage, so here I am."
"Wow. That was a long, sad story. And that wasn't even your whole life" I said teasing her, trying to lighten her mood; she was too sad.
"Yeah, well, I can't tell you my life story. I've only known you for about an hour. Only people I know for a full day get to hear my life's story" Sara said as she gulped the other half of her water bottle, trying to crack a joke to make herself smile. "So what about you?" She asked me, making me freeze in my spot. I don't think I was ready to talk about her. "I mean, I understand if you don't want to talk about it, at least not right now." She said smiling, sticking her tongue out at me. "I know I'm a little more open with people than I should be. Which is why I probably just blurted that whole, long story out to you. But I figured it would be easier for me to just tell you considering I'm going to be living with you for about a year."
I shook my head, understanding her reasons. I just wasn't ready to talk about her at all. I didn't even want to think about her. It brought me too much pain.
"I'm just . . . not ready" I said, getting an understanding nod.
"Alright, but that's not gonna stop me from being noisy about other things" Sara said laughing, making me lightly laugh as well. "What classes are you taking?"
"Everything and anything to do with music. You?"
"Same, but I'm also taking art classes, as well as a culinary class. To add to it, I'm taking separate classes for history and philosophy."
"Wow," I said, surprised that someone would take that much classes, "like to keep yourself busy?"
"Well, I hate being bored" She said as she rose from her seat. "I gave you the good bedroom" she said, walking over to the door right next to the couch she had been sitting in. "It's got a lovely view."
"How nice of you" I said, walking over to pick up my bag. "What's the catch?"
"No catch. It's just that your room had a bed in it, and mine didn't. And I brought my own bed, so it was easier for me to take the one I have."
"I see" I said a little loudly from inside of my room.
"Okay, I'm going to go get some food. Do you have anything particular that you would like me to get?" I heard Sara ask, here voice sounding farther away by the second.
"No, I'm fine" I shouted at her before I heard the front door to our dorm close.
I took in my room. It was actually really nice. There was a bed on the far wall to my left, one side of it leaned up against the wall. Next to the bed was a pretty big window with an excellent view, just like Sara had said. There was a nice wooden desk leaned against the wall to my right. To the wall to my left were wooden drawers for clothes. I kicked my black duffle back that was at my feet toward the wooden drawers. Why not unpack? I had nothing better to do.