(Switch POV Ashley)
I hadn't slept once the entire night. I was too preoccupied re-memorizing how Spencer's body felt against mine. It seemed to fit so perfectly into me. I was too caught up the scent that radiated from her body, flowers and strawberries. The scent intoxicated my lungs and sent shocks through my entire body. And when she would turn and face me in her sleep I fell in love over and over again with her beautiful, peaceful face. I sighed. I felt so at peace just laying by her side. My heart was overwhelmed with the close proximity.
I woke Spencer up some time around noon. I gently shook her body, slowly weaning her into consciousness. I would whisper into her ear lightly and sing a "good morning" or "it's time to get up." She would just smile and remain in the limbo between sleeping and full consciousness.
"Come on, Spence" I said lightly, staring at her intently.
"No" She said in a childish voice as she scrunched her face in the cutest way, causing me to smile in adoration.
"You gotta get up, Spence" I said as I placed my hand onto her face, running my thumb across her skin lightly.
"Mmmmmmmm" She moaned in despair, loving her sleep so dearly.
Spencer leaned into my touch, stretching her body in the process. She held her hands above her head and curved her body in more toward me, pressing her body more firmly into mine and sending a million jolts through my body. I took in a deep breath and tried to force myself to release it before Spencer opened her eyes. Unfortunately, just as I released the shaky breath Spencer was wide awake, staring at me as realization hit her.
"I'm sorry" Spencer said as she moved a few inches away from my body. "No" I thought, hating myself for breathing.
"It's fine" I said, trying to muster the most innocent smile I could.
Spencer stared at me for a moment. I guess she was trying to decide whether to say something cocky or if she should just let it go. A cocky grin grew on her face, giving me my answer.
"I'm sure you don't mind. I mean, who wouldn't mind having my sexy ass this close?" Spencer asked me, pushing body in toward me as she pronounced the last two words with exaggeration.
I closed my eyes at the contact, damning myself for it. I was letting her get the best of me. I was letting her use the advantages I had learned she had over me so long ago. I opened my eyes, feeling the lust and attitude they held. Spencer seemed taken aback and halted, seeming mesmerized.
"Ash?" Spencer questioned as I felt myself being dragged in toward her face.
Those lips. How badly I wanted to kiss them. I wanted to ravish them so that they would be bruised. I wanted to feel the accomplishment of wearing those sexy, lush lips out, just like I had done millions of times before. Oh, how badly I wanted to feel the sweet heavenly extasy of those lips.
I stopped moving toward Spencer a few mere centimeters from her lips. I used my hand that still lingered on her cheek and moved it slightly so I was able to run my thumb across her bottom lip. She shivered. I smiled widely. I had always loved the effect I had on her. Whether she wanted to admit it or not, I was what controlled every fiber of longing, want, and need that burned underneath her skin. Just like she controlled everything that burned beneath mine.
I parted my lips slightly, seeming as if I was going to kiss her. Spencer stared at my lips, just as mesmerized as I was. She wanted the kiss. I knew it. I wanted it just as bad. But I had a plan and I was going to stick to, no matter how damned tempting she was.
I smiled evilly, my lips still parted, hovering over hers. "Get up" I whispered onto her lips, causing her to close her eyes tightly and shutter.
I smiled pleasingly as I rose from the bed, making sure to climb over her body and make skin contact in the process. She groaned very loudly as I headed out of my room.
"You're such a damn tease!" I heard her shout at me as I headed toward the fridge for some lunch.
After eating and getting dressed, Spencer and I decided to check out the fund raiser concert Sara had told us about. I had seen flyers all over every college campus I had been to with directions on every single flyer. So I just grabbed one of the flyers and Spencer and I headed out to find it.
We drove around for about an hour until we found ourselves in a small town called Riverside, in New Jersey. We parked near down town, having to walk about five blocks because it was so crowded. When we reached down town, it was filled with tons of different music stands. Stand for fund raisers, stands from major music companies, stands from recording companies; stands for just about everything to involve with music. Not to mention there were food stands everywhere. Places like Stewart's, to White Castle, to some dinner, and random brazil food stands that seemed to in populate the town.
As Spencer and I walked further down town, lightly letting our hands brush, I was greeted with loud music and Sara's voice. I smiled as I took Spencer's hand in mine firmly and walked her through the crowd that surrounded the band that Sara was playing with to the front, making sure Sara could see us. When she spotted us while performing she flashed us a quick smile, seeming happy we were there.
"Loud enough?" I heard Spencer shout near my ear, making sure I was able to hear her.
"Of course not!" I shouted back, steeling a smile from Spencer.
I grasped Spencer's hand firmly in mine as I turned from her to take in the band. There was Sara, who was playing a very nice, white Les Paul and was singing. Jason had a nice, black Les Paul and was singing as well. A bass player that had a nice, green and white Fender who also had a microphone but was not using it at the moment. Then there was the drummer who was hidden in the back round, playing on a nice set of cherry-red Pearl drums. They all looked sweaty and exhausted but seemed to be to into the music they were playing to care. I was concerned for Sara's well being though. It wasn't good to be sweating like that outside on a cold December's day.
After about an hour of standing there with Spencer, holding her hand, watching them play, I dragged Spencer away from the band so we could go look at all of the different stands. I had a field day! I kept going on and on about every little musical item I saw, telling Spencer random, useless facts. But she listened and smiled, trying her best to keep interest.
A couple of hours after I was done looking, Spencer looked like she was about to freeze. I ran her back to that car as fast as I could, turning the heat on full blast. I knew she would be okay when her teeth stopped chattering. A wave of relief washed over me. I had almost frozen her to death. "God, I'm so selfish" I thought to myself, staring at Spencer as she hovered over the heating vents of my car. "I almost made Spencer freeze because I wanted to look at every little thing there. Damn me!"
"It's okay" I heard Spencer whisper to me, smiling brightly.
I hadn't realized I had been staring at Spencer while I was yelling at myself in my head. She must have noticed my worried eyes.
"Really. I'm fine" Spencer said as she took hold of my hand and squeezed it. I jumped at how cold her fingers felt.
"Jesus Spencer! You're freezing!" I said as I cupped her hand with both of mine, more worry filling me.
"I'm fine" She reassured me once again, putting her free hand on top of my mine.
"But--"
"Really, I am truly fine. I wouldn't say I was if I wasn't" She said as she rubbed my hands with her free one, sending a rush of comfort and happiness through my hole body.
We stared at each other for a few long moments, enjoying the feel of the each other's hands. I couldn't suppress the smile that formed on my face. It seemed all I had been doing since Spencer came back into my life was smiling, and I didn't mind. Just being around her made me feel like I was on top of the world. Her presence alone made me feel so ecstatic. Even if she was in a room with me yelling, I still don't think I would have minded. She was just . . . good for my soul.
"Hey Spence . . . " I began, a lump forming in my throat at just the thought of the conversation I was just about to start.
"Yeah?" She asked me concerned, noticing the seriousness in my voice.
"I'm . . . sorry." I said as I stared deep into her eyes, trying to put every once of sincerity I had in me into those two familiar words, desperately wanting them to have meaning again.
"Ashley, I'm fine--"
"No Spencer, I'm sorry" I said again with the same amount of seriousness.
Spencer realized what I meant and slowly pulled her hands away from mine. She turned from me a looked outside the car window, staring at the old, rotting building infront of her. She waited a few minutes before answering me, my heart beating harder in every second of silence that passed by.
"Why do you . . . ?" Spencer started as she turned back toward me. Her face looked tortured and sad, and her eyes were glistening with tears. "Why do you do this Ashley? We were having a good time and you . . . bring that up. Why?"
"I needed to say."
"Why now?" Spencer asked shouting, a single tear cascading down her face.
"Because I finally had the courage I needed to say it" I said, my voice sounding sorrowful and desperate. "I'm truly sorry, Spencer. God, I don't think you have any idea how sorry I am."
"Well sorry doesn't help, Ashley!" Spencer full on screamed at me, letting all of her tears fall from her gorgeous blue eyes. I winced at the sound of her voice and at the sight of her present state, she was shattering to pieces again and I was to blame, again. "Sorry doesn't just make things go away, Ashley! It doesn't help the sting of rejection, or the burn of losing you! Saying sorry only shows that you know you messed up and that you're willing to fix it, it doesn't help!"
By now, Spencer was sobbing, barely able to talk. The never-ending pool of tears that flowed so easily from her eyes racked her body, causing her to shake involuntarily. I reached for her hand and as I was about to grab hold of it she pulled it away. I reached for it again and latched on, not letting her escape my grasp.
"But I am sorry," I said as I brought her hand to my mouth and began to place light kisses on it between every word that came out of my mouth, "and I am willing to fix the mess I made of your heart."
Spencer began to cry more as she latched onto my body and tightly embraced me. At first, it took me off guard, but it wasn't long until I returned the embrace, not wanting to ever let go. She berried her head in the crook of my neck, sobbing all of her sorrow into it. I held her tighter, if it was even possible, and began to soothingly rub her back.
I wanted to cry. Her crying made me so feel so tormented. But I wouldn't cry, I would hold on for her. I just held her in my arms for what seemed like forever until she finally stopped crying. She eventually leaned back so we were able to stare into each other's eyes.
"I mean it Spence. I'm willing to pay for my mistakes if you're willing to take me back" I said as a small smile formed on my lips.
"Good," Spencer said as she returned my smile, her voice raspy from all of her crying, "because I want to forgive you. I want to be with you." My smile widened and a ray of hope filled my heart. "That doesn't mean everything's going to be like it was. Eventually it'll almost be the same, but I need time to heal, to learn how to trust you again."
"I know" I said, my voice coming out as a whisper. "As long as there's hope . . . "
Spencer smiled brightly as she leaned in and brushed her lips against mine. My heart stopped at that moment. After my shock had subsided, I gently leaned into the kiss, not pushing and further. She pulled away and I couldn't hide the giant smile that was spread across my face. She just nodded her head and bit her lower lip as she began to trace the outlines of my face. I closed my eyes and savored every touch. I heard her laugh lightly before pulling away from me completely, leaving me cold. I opened my eyes and found Spencer putting her seat belt on.
"Let's go" Spencer said, waiting for me to move. I drug my eyes away from her and turned my attention to driving. Here was the second chance I had been dying for.