Sloppy. Unrefined. Undisciplined. Pathetic. Embarrassing. Disappointing.
By Darth Bane's name, had he been like this when he started out as an apprentice? He better not have been.
The thoughts trickled down Sidious's mind as he dragged his unconscious apprentice through the halls with the Force. He was already missing Maul. Oh he had so much work to do. She had all that potential, and barely a clue how to bring any of it out. She could hardly use the Dark Side for anything but base actions. Feeding off pain and anger was something any neophyte of the Dark Side could do. To turn that power into something refined? She was far from it. Her blasted Jedi training was interfering, he could feel it, that sickening light that was still far to bright. It had shrunk ever so slightly over the week he had been away, but not nearly enough, not like it had in her cell. She wanted the power to kill him, it was no secret, and something he would encourage, but it was like a forbidden fruit. She wanted it, she knew she wanted it, had probably said outloud to herself that she wanted it, but could only nibble on the fruit, restraining herself.
He slowly shook his head. He didn't know why he was surprised, or irritated. It was to be expected. This... transitional period... was not typical for most fallen Jedi. At least not since the great Sith Empires of the past existed. Fallen, 'taken in' by a Sith, delving into the Dark Side for the express purpose of killing the Sith who claimed them, slowly being tempted and turned more and more by the power. Most fallen Jedi in this day and age simply rushed in headfirst and embraced the Dark Side. There had been one not to long ago, what was his name again, Xana-something? The gnat's name didn't really matter.
The situation did.
His apprentice was unbalanced, unable to properly give herself over to the Dark Side, but because she had fallen, she had no grasp of the light and could not even be considered properly 'grey'. She had no even footing in the Force, and it bled out visibly. Her first attempts at Makashi were pitiful and counterproductive. If she had given herself over to Juyo, to encourage her to use ferocity and anger into her fighting style, it would quicken her descent. But no, she had chosen a form that required heavy control over herself. The form was of course not without merits. So few Jedi practiced Makashi, or even knew how to properly fight it. She would easily slaughter almost any Jedi she fought, which was why he allowed it. Only Dooku was a true master of the form, Sidious grudgingly admitted Dooku was probably better with it than he was, not that it would save him in an actual confrontation with the Sith Lord. Regardless, it was yet again a long term investment VS a short term problem.
He had the annoying feeling that that issue would crop up a lot with his apprentice.
Sidious reached his apprentice's room and not-so-gracefully levitated her above her bed and then dumped her on it. He leaned against a nearby wall, staring silently at her unconscious form. He pondered, for the briefest of moments, if she was honestly worth the effort. His greatest 'fear' was that the Jedi training would always hold her back, preventing her from being a true Sith. Wasting years trying to train an apprentice only for the effort to fail was a danger that had plagued the Line of Bane since it's inception. Even the first master and apprentice, Bane and Zannah, had that issue. Bane had went in search of immortality because he feared his apprentice had become unworthy, waiting for Bane to weaken with old age. Of course that problem had sorted itself out, but, it was a doubt that plagued each successive Sith Master to come. It was a doubt that was making him second guess his choice in her.
Slowly, he stalked forward until he reached the side of her bed, he reached forward and raked a hand possessively through her hair, dark energy swelling around him. "You have the potential, but are you worthy, my apprentice?"
He would not waste his time, the Dark Side would show him the answer. He dove into it's depths, trying to pry the secrets of his apprentice's future...
She had grown into a powerful woman, still bearing the robes of a Sith Apprentice. She discarded her cloak, drew her lightsaber, and activated it, a blood red igniting from both ends, a contemptible sneer on her face. His apprentice dueled a pair of Jedi in the Theed Palace in Naboo. Her blade spun defensively back and forth, forming an impressive wall of defense the Jedi could not penetrate as she lured them deeper into the complex. Yet despite the intent of the duel, her eyes, her blue eyes, seemed troubled, and not the Sithly yellow they should be...
Sidious frowned, thoughtful. He recognized this, from the vision he had of Maul, the moment the Sith announced themselves to the Jedi. He was curious how her form would switch from a single saber Makashi to a double-bladed Soresu, but dismissed it. This was good, that she would challenge the Jedi, yet, those eyes were not that of a Sith. Did she simply become a replacement tool for Maul? He scowled intently, unsatisfied, and dove back into the Dark Side. He demanded of it, 'Show me my Apprentice, show me my Sith', 'show me a Sith worthy of contending for the mantle of the Dark Lord of the Sith'...
Sidious saw himself dueling Master Yoda in the senate building, throwing the repulsorpods at the little green troll. The two of them ended the confrontation in a massive struggle of Force energy, lightning exploding between them. Yoda crashed to the far bottom of the chamber as Sidious cackled with laughter, pulling himself up to a pod. He stared down at the troll mockingly, the Jedi had failed. He was still alive, victory was his!
"Celebrating already Master?" came a cold voice.
Sidious froze and slowly turned, sighting his apprentice walking out onto a repulsorpod behind him, purple saberstaff activating, deadly intent in her blue eyes.
Sidious sneered at her, levitating his own lightsaber back into his hands, his voice mocking, "If it isn't my blue-eyed apprentice. Come to attempt what the Jedi failed to do? You must know your no match for me, Tachi."
Siri's lips peeled pack into her own sneer as the temperature in the room plummeted, and the repulsorpods began to shake. "Siri Tachi isn't here right now."
Sidious let a small gasp of surprise escape his lips as the Dark Side howled around the young woman, yet he was not fearful, no, he was delighted. "At last. You've returned to me my apprentice, welcome back Darth..."
He didn't get another word out as she leaped through the air, an inhuman dark roar escaping her lips, intensely yellow Sith eyes blazing as she brought her lightsaber down upon his...
Dark elation and satisfaction rippled out of Sidious. "Good, good. Clever too, waiting for my to expend myself against Yoda."
He was more than curious about how he came to be dueling that little troll in the senate chamber, but he'd allow time to reveal that mystery to him. Yet... something about his word choice in the vision troubled him. Come back to him? What exactly did that mean...
He had little time to dwell on the thought as the Dark Side gripped him, taking him by surprise as it dragged him down into another vision, this time not by his own desire...
A cloaked Sith Master strode through the ancient ruins of Korriban, a little brown haired girl fearfully following behind her. "D-do we h-have to c-come here? It's s-scary..."
The Sith Master paused, and then spoke, Sidious recognized the voice of his apprentice. "The dark is nothing to fear Leia."
"B-but...," began the little girl.
His apprentice cut her off. "You said you wanted the power to take revenge, did you not, my apprentice? You can't take it if you stand there trembling like a coward."
Leia froze up for a moment before anger and rage so unusual for one so young played across her face. "I will! I will take revenge! I'll kill that decrepit old bastard for what he did to my family!"
"Then come," said the Sith Master, continuing her path into the dark ruins.
Leia's head briefly turned back the way she came, towards the light and a ship that could take her off the planet, before she turned back and followed her Master into the darkness...
The Dark Side let Sidious go, a pleasured purr of satisfaction in his ear. Sidious pulled his hand out of his apprentice's hair, satisfied as well. The Line of Bane would continue. While he was somewhat disappointed he would perish, it was how it had been for the last thousand years. Oh he had no plans of going easy on his apprentice, in fact, he would be a fool to allow her the chance to fight him after he had wasted energy fighting Yoda. The future was always in motion after all. He briefly paused on the hazy image of his... what would the term be? Grand-apprentice? It wasn't something Sith generally had the chance to think about, it was more a Jedi thing to actually interact with their legacy lines. He wondered who could inspire such rage in so young a girl, he did not envy whoever it was, the wrath of the Sith was a legendary thing. They were going to die a painful death, that much he could feel without needing to delve back into the future.
He examined his apprentice again, longing to see and possess that dangerous yellow glint in her future self's eye, his hand gripping the side of her face tightly. "You are mine my apprentice. Your future is my darkness, your path is my legacy. You will become everything I choose you to be, until you break your final chain and kill me, becoming the Master."
He flashed a malicious grin. "If your strong enough when the time comes that is. I wont hesitate to kill you and continue chasing immortality if you fail after all."
He let out a slow devious laughter break through his lips, making his apprentice shift uncomfortably in her sleep, a nightmarish look crossing her face...
The next day became the first of many under her Master's direct watchful eye. In the morning, he directed her into a... new... type of meditation...
He stalked around her in the dimly lit barren meditation room. "To meditate in the Dark Side is to focus on one's self. The Jedi would have you empty your mind, abandon your sense of self. For one who resides in darkness, you must become the focal point, the direction of your meditation. Focus on your emotions, let them swell within you."
"That's... that entire purpose sounds selfish," said Siri.
"The Dark Side often is," mused Sidious.
Siri pursed her lips, trying to wrap her mind around it. Selfish meditation, making the entire point of it being about her. Force she felt shameful even thinking about it, and yet... also eager to try it. She hadn't been able to meditate properly since she... she fell..., even if it was a selfish meditation, she wanted to center herself.
"What is... the best emotion to use?" asked Siri.
"It differs per user," admitted Sidious, "Generally, anger is the easiest start."
"Can any emotion be used?" asked Siri.
"Anger, hate, frustration, greedy, envy," said Sidious, waving a hand, "Any darker emotion will fulfill the requirement."
She pondered briefly if positive emotions could be used, but figured they either couldn't or Sidious wouldn't want them to be used. Siri closed her eyes, took in a breath, and slowly let it out. She focused on the image of the beast that killed Master Gallia. Anger and hate roiled around her. Instead of directing it anywhere, to use it, she dove into it, let it wash over her. She... she hated seeing the sight of her Master dying in her minds eye again, yet she knew no other way to maintain such an intense level of rage. Slowly, she felt the emotions compact around her, and then within her, rather than churning all around the air about her. She felt... not calm, not at all, but focused. Intensely focused.
"What's next?" she snarled out, opening her eyes to glare at Sidious.
The Sith slowly stepped forward and reached down, grabbing her chin and tilting her head up, a scowl spreading across his face when he looked into her eyes from underneath his hood. "For such intense hate, your eyes are still sickeningly blue."
She blinked once, blinked twice, and lost her anger and hate to pure confusion. "What does my eye color have to do with anything?"
"More then you think, my blue-eyed apprentice," he said with so mocking a tone she knew it had to be a heavy insult, though she couldn't figure out why, "I suppose I feel the issue. The anger you feel is not the anger a Sith requires."
Siri's eyebrows furrowed. "Anger is anger."
Sidious scoffed. "And you would know anything about the dreaded emotion that Jedi so readily fear?"
"A Jedi does not fear," said Siri.
Sidious's lips slowly peeled back into a cruel smile. "You did."
Siri went silent for a moment before she gave a soft sigh. "And that's why I fell."
Sidious, in what was starting to become a very familiar manner to Siri, began to slowly circle her. "To answer your question. Anger comes in many different forms. Righteous anger, what you feel towards Maul, is a more neutral type of anger. It is a poor fuel for the Dark Side, but if accompanied by an immense infusion of hate, it will work sufficiently."
"Petty anger, small things that irritate you, are merely tinder for the fire," said Sidious, "Or embers that ignite it. Think of something small that angers you, then link it to something larger, and then repeat the process until you have a pathway to that which makes you boil inside."
"Huh," murmured Siri, "That's one way to continually keep yourself angry."
"That is the point, apprentice," said Sidious thinly, irritation faintly leaking through his shields, "I would have thought that evident. Surely the Jedi must have stories about the 'raging Sith' of the past."
"Well, yeah, but...," said Siri before trailing off, "But, why?"
Sidious gave her a quizzical look. "Why what?"
"Why be angry and hateful all the time?" she asked honestly, "I get that you use it for power, but all the time? Isn't that a lot of effort to maintain it? To never relax?"
Sidious leveled his yellow eyes at her. "While it has changed to a degree since the Rule of Two began, Sith of ancient times needed to have their power readily available. Treachery is the way of the Sith, and to let your guard down for a moment was begging to die, to be killed by fellow Sith and have your position taken and assets converted."
"That just... seems like an awful way to live," said Siri quietly.
Sidious didn't seem to care. "There is always a price one must pay for power my apprentice. The struggle to gain and maintain that power never fades."
Siri nodded slowly before asking, "What exactly is the Rule of Two?"
"Two there should be; no more, no less. One to embody power, the other to crave it," said Sidious with an odd mixture of reverence and loathing.
"I... don't get it," she said, "Two what?"
"Two Sith," he answered, exasperated, "Or have you not noted the lack of legions of Sith parading around the Galaxy?"
Siri bristled a bit but squashed it. "I suppose."
"The Sith were our own worst enemy," mused Sidious, "We lost our wars with the Jedi not through their strength, but our own, because we destroyed ourselves. The Rule of Two corrects this. The Master trains the apprentice until the Apprentice becomes strong enough to kill the Master and take their place."
Siri stared at him blankly for a moment. "You... you want me to kill you!?"
Sidious shrugged. "If you become strong and worthy enough I suppose it wouldn't be to much of a travesty."
Siri was speechless. "You..."
Oh she was pissed! She wanted him dead, but that was what he wanted? Kind of? What in the nine Corellian Hells was this madness...?
All she could really manage was a sputtering, "Y-You Sith are screwed up!"
"It works," said Sidious with seeming indifference, "Each generation of Sith builds upon the last, towards the return of the Sith and our revenge."
"Revenge?" asked Siri.
"While the Sith may destroy themselves, it has almost always been the Jedi who deal the final blow," spat Sidious, "Time and time again since the original split between the two orders, when the Jedi so foolishly cast us out, they have slaughtered us. When the time comes, the Sith will have their revenge against the Jedi."
"Wait... what?" she said, completely bypassing the revenge bit over something she couldn't possibly believe, "The Sith and Jedi... no way, there's no way they were ever joined..."
"The Je'daii Order was a sect of Force Sensitives that lived on the planet Tython roughly twenty-five thousand years ago," said Sidious with a hint of disdain, "It was a sect that foolishly preached balance. It worked I suppose for a time, until someone discovered their tiny little hidden corner of the Galaxy and tipped the scales."
"Balance?" she asked.
"A fools notion," mused Sidious, "The Je'daii attempted to maintain a balance within themselves of both sides of the Force. Live in a perfectly sterile environment, isolated from the rest of the Galaxy with a strict regiment, which included banishment to two separate moons of all things if one broke said regiment, and perhaps you can. But the moment real life, real hardship, enters the picture, that fake balance is thrown away. The true nature, the dark nature of the Galaxy, is all there really is, and it always wins in the end. Those of the Je'daai that focused more on the call of the dark than the light were eventually cast out, and thus began a conflict that has lasted almost twenty-five thousand years."
Siri was silent. She didn't feel any deception from the Sith, in fact, his shields were slightly lowered, a mocking sensation emanating from him, daring her to second guess him and taste for the truth. She didn't bother. "I see."
"Do you really?" questioned Sidious, "While I personally do not care, let me enlighten you of something. How many wars between the Jedi and the Sith have broken out in that timeframe, if you know? How many lives have been lost because those that would become the Jedi refused to accept the dark?"
Siri didn't answer, extremely uncomfortable with the question.
"Trillions," said Sidious simply, "Perhaps even more if one considers the amount of bloodlines that were prevented from running their course. A single man could have had many branching descendants in that time-frame after all."
Siri pursed her lips, hands shaking at even the notion of such loss or prevention of life.
"Such a shame too," mused Sidious, "And here I thought those of the light were supposed to be tolerant..."
"Enough!" spat Siri, rising to her feet.
Only for her to get flattened with a wave of Sidious's hand, immense pressure burying her face into the floor. "No my apprentice, it is never enough, will never be enough until the Jedi have truly been brought low as the Sith have been, to extinction. And they will have no one to blame but themselves. For incurring the revenge of the Sith. And being so incompetent that they can't find the darkness hiding under their nose."
He cackled. "Would you be interested in knowing that we are not honestly that far from the Jedi Temple right now?"
Siri managed to twist her head to stare up at him in disbelief.
"It's true, I'm using the Dark Side not even half a planet away and they have naught a clue. Beyond that, I've been in the presence of many a Jedi, even Master Yoda, and they've been none the wiser," boasted Sidious, "Those who flounder in light can never find what resides in darkness, even if it's staring them right in their arrogant faces."
The pressure lifted off of her, and Siri slowly rose to a sitting position. "How?"
"It is called Force Clouding, and it is one of the first techniques you will learn from me," said Sidious, a cruel smile playing across his lips, "I will show you how, it's not honestly a difficult technique to master, and you will hide somewhere in this building. If I find you, I will punish you for your failure. We will repeat this process until you are able to successfully force me to find you by chance rather than your leaking presence."
"And how do I know you won't just lie and 'punish' me if you find me by chance anyway?" spat Siri.
A mocking tone rang out of the man's list, "My apprentice, you wound me."
He hadn't even bothered to outright deny it...
"But I believe we have skipped ahead," said Sidious, "If I recall, I was explaining anger to you. Righteous and petty anger, while they have their uses, are not what a Sith needs. Pure, raw, rage, is what ignites a Sith's fury."
"Wouldn't that impair my judgment?" she asked, forcing herself to let go of the previous conversation, "I've seen it enough in other hot-headed padawans."
"indeed," said Sidious with a hint of approval, "Lesser Sith would be consumed by their rage, letting it posses and control them when they should control it. Such rage needs to be kept in check, behind chains, until you set it free at the right moment."
"So... only allow yourself to get mad and explode when it actually serves a purpose," summarized Siri.
"Correct," answered Sidious, "But beyond simple rage, there is something... else... that has served as the foundation of the Rule of Two. Something so much more."
"What?" asked Siri.
She wished she hadn't asked. Coldness bled out into the air all around them as Sidious's awful presence chocked the air. She couldn't help but wrap her arms around herself in a reflexive attempt to stay warm. By the Force... what was this?
"Cold anger," said Sidious, his voice ice, "Allowed to boil quietly beneath the surface. Where hot rage is a uncontrollable bomb that burns out once spent, cold fury is a guided missile that can be held for decades."
Siri couldn't help it. She forgot her anger and hate for the man and felt pure, raw, fear. She had never felt hatred like what was emanating from Sidious before. The darkness that bled out of him was like a swirling malevolent vortex, a black hole, that consumed everything around it. It was the most awful thing ever. He radiated so much pure power. She was scared of him, oh now more than ever, but it gave her a brief measure, a goal of just how strong she had to become to kill him.
She had a long way to go.
Sidious's presence retracted, along with the pressure binding Siri to the floor. "This type of anger is what you must learn to wield. The one most compatible with hatred, it's constant companion. Learn to sit on your anger, your hate, let it boil and build for years, decades, until at last, the moment of reckoning arrives. Do you understand?"
Was this anger... this hate... really the source of his power? Did it truly give him so much strength? Could she learn to harness that kind of power? Force... now that the fear was gone, thinking of the power he had... could she become that powerful...?
"I understand... but... I'm not sure how," she admitted, "I've never held anger or hate like that."
Sidious nodded in acknowledgement. "I would not have expected a former Jedi to. But you will learn, oh yes, you will learn. Now... moving on to what I hinted at earlier..."
"The first part of hiding your presence is to withdraw your energy into yourself, to not use the Force unless for a specific purpose," he explained.
Siri gave him a baffled look. "I'm not using the Force right now."
"Aren't you?" he asked, amused, "Are you not always sensing the area around you? Able to detect Force Sensitives without even laying your eyes upon them? Able to feel a disturbance in the Force off at a distance? Always open to hear to hear a whisper or warning the Force deigns to give you?"
Siri went silent.
"Need I go on?" mocked Sidious.
"No," said Siri, "But... how would I stop doing that?"
"Close your eyes," demanded Sidious.
She did so.
"A Jedi would tell you to feel for the Force," said Sidious, "I would tell you to feel for yourself."
Siri's eyebrows furrowed. "Myself?"
"You can identify the Force Signatures of others, but have you ever truly identified your own?" asked Sidious.
Siri frowned, trying to puzzle out what he was going for. "Every Jedi does, we learn how to reach through the Force through our connection to it..."
Sidious growled in warning, shutting her up before he spoke, "No you fool. I am not talking about using the Force. I am talking about identifying your own presence! The concept is not that difficult. Search for your own signature as you would another's. Feel for the energy, the presence you give off."
It was a... curious task. She wasn't sure exactly how to go about it. Feeling inwardly for the Force was easy, but... not what he was going for. Going off a guess, she reached out for his presence, poking and prodding very lightly as to not agitate. Sidious didn't so much as twitch, she could feel his eyes boring into her though, a not-so-subtle burst of impatience slamming right into her next prod. She took the hint, took that probe, and tried doing the same thing to herself.
It was such an odd thing, to try to look outside-in. She first poked at her mental shields, not peeking out from the inside, but trying to look at them as an outside force would. Though it wasn't the goal of the task she had been given, her shields made her slightly cringe, she had to work on getting them back into top shape. She had done very little to repair or reinforce them ever since... well... before she fell.
She shook off the observation for later and began trying to poke for the Force around her. Despite her eyes being closed, she could see an almost aura like outline around herself. It was chaotic, light and dark swirling and clashing around and within herself. As for the feeling she gave of... it wasn't what she had thought it would be, hoped it would be.
It was awful to really realize how one's world could be ruined in so short a time. Siri had thought she would always come off as a strong, confidence, wont-take-your-shit kind of person. The sensation she felt emanating from herself was nothing of the sort. It felt... broken... weak... confused... lost... frustrated and angry...
Worst of all.
Her presence felt helpless, like she was floundering around.
She had felt plenty of self-loathing during her captivity. But self-hatred? That was new, and that was what her presence made her feel.
"Ah, I feel you've finally realized it," said Sidious, "Just how pitiful you are right now."
Siri opened her eyes and glared at him, frustration and shame churning in her stomach.
Sidious smiled mockingly in response. "All the helpless anger in the universe wont aid you. You think dabbling slowly into darkness and wanting to kill me gives you a purpose? Fool, all Sith Apprentices, worthy or not, have that same desire. In ancient times, Sith used to have a multitude of apprentices or acolytes, all of them power hungry, most of them were pathetic weaklings that the Master would keep around for their own amusement, to kill later to make a point, or to sacrifice to further their own goals."
He bared his teeth. "Is that what you want? My blue-eyed apprentice? To be a tool used for my amusement and gain, only to be thrown away when it suits me?"
"I am not a tool!" she spat at him.
Sidious sneered at her. "No, you're not, at the moment you are a useless little girl, not even managing to attain the status of a tool."
Siri flinched at that.
He slowly shook his head. "It's going to take such effort to mold you. Sometimes I wonder if it's worth the effort, if I shouldn't just kill you right here and now."
Siri froze for a moment, fear spiking, before she took a stranglehold on it and crushed it. "Yeah? Well what would you do in my position?"
"I would never be in your position for starters," mused Sidious, "I took to the darkness quite well. My first true act of the dark side was to slaughter my entire family."
Siri chocked a bit. "Y-you what?!"
Sidious grinned, slowly licking his lips. "My one regret out of that was that I didn't catch the moment on holo to watch over and over again. It was the moment I stepped onto my path to greatness. I pledged myself to my Master not much later and began my journey to what you see now."
Siri frowned for a moment, looking past his mass murder and focusing on the one thing she desired at the moment, "What was it like? To kill your Master?"
Oddly, that question seemed to catch him offguard, he went silent, a scowl spreading across his lips.
Instead of directly answering, he raised a hand and unleashed a burst of lightning, sending Siri to the ground writhing in pain. "You'll uncover that sensation on your own. Which you'll never do if you don't put yourself together, pick your path, and get on with it."
He withdrew his lightning, leaving her smoking a little, "Now, to continue, focus on your presence again."
Siri took in a few shaky breaths, trying to will the pain away, before closing her eyes
"You know your pitiful presence, now grasp it, and withdraw it into yourself," ordered Sidious.
Siri focused on the aura of dark and light energy warring around her. She watched it for a moment before trying to withdraw it, focusing the Force within herself. Slowly, the aura bled into her, until most if it had sunk within her skin.
"Passable," muttered Sidious, "But your leaking the Force out of your body. The next step is to imagine your body like your mind and create a... not a shield, but a disguise."
"Disguise?" she asked.
"Of insignificance," he answered, "As if you are just a normal, everyday pathetic sentient who isn't worth looking into. This allows you to move about in public without someone feeling your Force Signature. They will still feel you, but what they feel is merely a mask that you wear."
Siri blanked for a moment, the Jedi did something like that on missions to go unnoticed, this wasn't to many steps above it. "Force... is it really that easy?"
"Yes," said the Sith.
"And no one sees through it?" she asked.
"No," he answered, "Jedi generally don't bother to dig deeper. If for some reason they do, it's fairly easy to fake something for them to feel to satisfy their probe."
"Not to mention it's taboo for a Jedi to force a mind probe in without just cause," she murmured.
"Indeed," mocked Sidious, "The Jedi limit themselves in so many ways, it's easy to dance around them, as the Sith have been doing for the last thousand years. Now, let's see if you can do the same."
For once since she got here, she had absolutely no lack of confidence in this task. She imagined herself as Bruck Chun. A dead pathetic loser who tried to act tough and pick on other people, especially her poor Obi-Wan, oh it pissed her off now to think back on how Bruck had tormented her friend. The truth of it was that Bruck was so insecure about his own lack of Master that it was all he could do to alleviate his own fears by putting down others. He had been a pawn to Xanatos, and died one. She could commend Obi-Wan for trying to save that asshole, but she would have considered a kick to Bruck's face sending the boy plummeting to his death a more appropriate response.
She took that shield, that mask, fueled it with her anger at Bruck, and wrapped herself in it.
"Well now," mused Sidious, starting forward and beginning to circle her.
Siri could feel light probes around her, not attempts to seriously dig in, but to test for any obvious weakness. "Acceptable for your first try I suppose."
She took that as the closest thing to a compliment he would ever really give her.
Sidious motioned to the door. "Perhaps this lesson may not take as long as I thought. Go, hide yourself. I will seek you out. Remember, if I find you, I will punish you. We will continue either until you pass out, you satisfy my expectations, or I have to leave to tend to other matters."
Siri fled the room and down the hall, searching for an appropriate spot. Her thoughts turned inward as she moved. She was pleased she had taken this lesson quite well in her opinion, but it didn't hide the shame she felt for what her presence gave off. She hated it. Back when she was an initiate, she had been one of the best, even able to challenge initiates older than her, and young padawans, beating them all in lightsaber practice. She had been confident and sure of herself. Fallen or not, dark side or not...
She wanted that feeling back.
No more pussyfooting. She needed to find stability, if not in the light that had seemingly abandoned her, then the dark. She'd take the time during this exercise to work on repairing her mental shields. Then, after they were done with this, she'd spend time getting used to feeling and using the Dark Side. She swore she would never truly become a Sith, never, but... but... she needed the Dark Side to eventually challenge Sidious, she knew it. She'd devote herself to his lessons, learn everything she could from him, then kill him.
Afterwords...
Well... she'd cross that bridge when she came to it. For now, she needed a hiding place. She found an store room in the back off the infirmary, flicked off the lights, and strode into the darkness...
Author's Notes:
Sidious totally missed who Leia was referring to in the vision, but then again, he's not a decrepit old bastard yet, is he? :D
Review Response:
Nermand3000: Glad you enjoy. Siri will slowly read and learn about the Sith of the past, and Zannah specifically has a role to play in shaping Siri's training (should be obvious if you pay attention to the visions), though that wont happen for awhile.