Growing Up Snape
By Teacherbev
AN: This story will not make much sense unless you read "Snape's Invisible Friend" before reading this. The story begins directly after the conclusion of SIF, summer 1985, just before Shaun/Harry turns five.
AN: I will answer questions if you will leave them in a review for me, and I thank all of you who have read and reviewed all of my stories. I appreciate each and every one of you (well maybe not the flamers). I have corrected a couple of minor errors that were pointed out to me in the last two chapters and I thank the reviewers who pointed them out to me. And yes, the number of days that Sirius was in Azkaban was correct if he entered the first week of November, 1981 and was released the end of June, 1985. (My credentials say I can teach math through calculus but I'm really not comfortable teaching past Trig.)
Chapter 4: The Truth Revealed
Shaun spent the afternoon playing with Fawkes and Nippy in his bedroom while his daddy brewed more nutrient potions for both Shaun and Sirius. Because his son still had to take one every day, Severus had reluctantly decided to flavor them with strawberry so the boy would swallow them. Hopefully, Shaun would catch up the lost height, weight and particularly bone strength soon. Poppy had originally had Shaun taking them four times a day; but over the past year she had gradually cut the dosage down so that now he just took one at breakfast. Before Severus had given in and flavored them; they had been a source of frustration as Severus wanted the child to swallow them and Shaun definitely did not want to. And they had fought that battle four times a day! But now, they were the perfect potion to brew when he wanted his hands busy but his mind free to roam.
Severus had thought before this day, that with the addition of Shaun to his life over the last year; he had finally let go of his anger and hatred of those blasted 'Marauders'. He truly could say he had become friends with Remus, well perhaps that was too strong a word, but at least a colleague and someone he trusted to care for his son. And he had spoken the truth about realizing that without James Potter he would never have the love of one small, messy haired boy. The gift of Shaun in his life made up for a lot of tasteless childhood pranks. But the realization that today he would come face to face with the worst of his school hood tormenters was making him grasp that he might not be quite as over them as he had thought. He had forgiven Sirius Black in the abstract; but today he would no longer be abstract; he would be a concrete part of his son's life and he wasn't at all sure that he wanted to share the boy with anyone else, let alone Black!
His long graceful fingers deftly continued to mindlessly prepare precisely diced ingredients as his mind pondered the futility of continuing a meaningless hatred. After all, there was no guarantee that Black would even have a mind left after four long years in the constant company of Dementors. Perhaps he would wait and just evaluate the situation after seeing what was left of Black. Albus and Remus should be returning shortly with him; that is if all had gone as scheduled on their journey.
Albus and Remus stepped down into the wildly rocking rowboat and then they both reached back to take an emaciated arm of the man they had come to the most dismal place in all of Great Britain to rescue. The short walk out the door and across the windswept and seawater slimed stones had taken almost all the energy the potions they had fed him had given to him. Moody and Gumboil practically lifted him into the gyrating boat and the two wizards maneuvered him into sitting down between Remus and Albus so that they could keep him upright as much as possible, and at least try to protect him from the bone chilling splashes of seawater that the wind blew into the boat with increasing force.
The two aurors climbed into the boat and sat down on the bench directly behind the three, and Moody motioned to a house elf to untie the boat as he pulled his wand and incanted the spells necessary to return it to the dock that thrust like a skeletal finger from the miserable bare coast. It took less time to return to the mainland than it had taken to reach Azkaban, the occupants knew it was due to the incoming tide increasing their speed, but none of them could deny it was also that with each moment they traveled away from the desolation and the centuries' deep layers of despair that the wizarding prison exuded; the chilling, mind-numbing effects of the dementors diminished, and the very temperature of the air increased.
Sirius had given up and was just leaning bonelessly and lifeless against his best friend by the time Roger had welcomed the five back to the mainland. Roger pulled his wand and levitated the now unconscious man onto a conjured stretcher on the slippery, water washed dock before reaching a hand out to help first Moody and Remus out of the now wildly gyrating boat. Remus knelt beside Sirius, checking his friend's condition as Moody helped Albus out of the boat, leaving Gumboil to fend for himself.
Roger reached into his spray saturated and slightly dripping robe and pulled out three, long slender wands, holding them out to the Headmaster to take. "There's no reason for you to bring him up to the guardhouse, Headmaster. Mr. Black isn't in any condition to be signing forms for the ministry, and Auror Moody's signature is just as good as yours to acknowledge his formal release; so go ahead and take that portkey back to Hogwarts directly." Roger said as Albus accepted his familiar time worn wand and handed Remus' to him. Gumboil took the last one from Roger, as Mad Eye Moody handed a long thin magenta scarf to Albus.
"I'll be talking to you later, Albus, to find out how he's doing. I understand that Minister Bones will be contacting you tomorrow also. Just grab hold and I'll activate that portkey for you. It's set up to send you directly to the hospital wing." Moody nodded at the floridly colored scarf in his hand.
"Thank you, gentlemen, we will be going then." Albus knelt down onto the wet wood and grabbed one side of the stretcher, motioning for Remus to hang on to the other with the scarf laying across Sirius' chest the two men grabbed it tightly and the three disappeared, leaving the three men alone on the dock to walk back to the guardhouse.
Poppy was already waiting for them, a bed ready, covered with a charmed heated mattress pad. A large collection of variously bright hued and strangely shaped potions bottles covering the top of the nightstand at the ready. She had extra blankets already charmed warm and a covered tray of food spelled to keep warm waiting on another table set up just out of the way.
The three wizards had barely arrived, the two crouched protectively on the floor next to the third still figure on the stretcher, when she started barking orders, Albus may be the Headmaster of Hogwarts and considered by most in the wizarding world to be the most powerful wizard of the day; but in the infirmary there was no doubt as to just who was really in charge! "Remus, get him up here and strip him down, Albus, there's hot chocolate with pepper-up potion in those mugs, I want you to drink one down and then give one to Remus. And don't you fuss at me, Albus Dumbledore; after an exposure to the Dementors like you had today, you both are staying here the night, and maybe longer if I say so!"
They had followed her orders without protest, well just a token one, and were standing out of her way as she cast diagnostic spells up and down the limp body on the bed in front of her, as sipping the potion laced hot chocolate. Without the shallow rise and fall of the skeletal chest it would have been impossible to tell that Sirius was not dead. She shook her head as she read the results, clucking her tongue in disapproval. She directed Remus to hold up his head and shoulders as she poured a variety of potions into the unconscious form, stopping every few minutes to recast her diagnostics. After a full thirty minutes, she sat down on the chair next to Sirius' bed, and wiping the stray wisps of hair that had escaped the confining bun that were now plastered to her forehead with sweat, she turned to the two patiently waiting men.
"That's the best I can do for today. He will recover, but it will be slow and frustrating for him. He's severely malnourished; of course you can tell that with one glance at him. He's going to need nutrient potions to rebuild bone and muscle mass, he had intestinal parasites, several cracked ribs, chronic pneumonia, and he's severely anemic. All of those a good diet, several weeks stay with me and some good old fashioned loving care will fix." Poppy hesitated before continuing, "But I can't tell you about his mental status until he wakes up. He could be fine eventually, he could have reverted to a small child, he could just be unable to handle the trauma and be catatonic, I can't tell until he wakes up fully."
"And when will that be, Poppy?" Remus was having a hard time keeping his fluctuating emotions under control as he gripped Sirius' hand tightly in his own icy ones.
She shook her head in regret, "I don't know, Remus. It could be in twenty minutes, it could be never. Or anything in between." Her voice was soft with compassion.
Albus stood behind the werewolf and grabbed him by both shoulders, "Remus, take heart, he was talking to us in Azkaban, he recognized who you were. And being here is the best place he could be to remember." Remus leaned his head back onto the old man's shoulder and turning his head slightly, looked directly into the sparkling blue eyes, "Do you really think so, Albus; will he be alright?" The hope in his eyes tore at the old man's heart as he was unable to completely reassure the tormented werewolf.
Poppy had fetched a bowl with a spoon and another mug of doctored hot chocolate which she gave to Remus. "See how much of this you can get down him. The chocolate is probably more important, but the broth has extra protein and nutrients added for him. He's very dehydrated and I'd like not to have to resort to injecting him with fluids if I can avoid it. He should be aware enough to swallow if you keep his head and shoulders elevated and take it really slow. I need to go and request some more specific potions from Severus to fully get rid of those parasites and take care of his anemia."
Remus picked up Sirius' head and shoulders while Albus arranged the pillows behind him. Remus took the spoon out of the broth and dribbled a small amount of the chocolate down between Sirius' cracked and dry lips. He swallowed about ten spoonfuls before he began to stir and show signs of awakening. Albus flicked his wand to turn the overhead lights down in the small private room while Moony called to Sirius. "Padfoot; it's Moony. You need to open your eyes and wake up. I have chocolate for you! Come on, you can wake up for me!" He had put down the mug and spoon and taken one icy hand and was rubbing it between his own, trying to warm Sirius up. Albus took his other hand and was repeating the motion from the other side of the bed.
Sirius' eyes flickered open and closed several times before remaining open. His eyes were flat and lifeless, unrecognizing of his surroundings. Remus leaned over him, tucking in the charmed blankets around his friend before he gripped his shoulders tightly and shook him gently. "Padfoot! Padfoot! It's Moony, you're in the hospital wing at Hogwarts, remember? Albus and I came and got you this morning. You aren't in Azkaban any more!"
"Not…a…dream…? Real?" Sirius whispered so softly that if Remus hadn't been practically sitting on him he wouldn't have heard him.
"No, friend, it's real. You are free. You will never go back there again!" Remus was so adamant that the sick man finally understood. Sirius turned his head slightly and his eyes showed more life than they had all day, "Moony?"
Moony had tears of joy making tracks through the dried salt of the sea spray on his face as he grinned at his old friend, "Yes, Sirius, it's Moony. Now you need to drink some more of this chocolate and broth so that you will get better."
Albus snuck out the door without either of them noticing that he had even gone. Moony talking gently to Sirius as he spooned the life-giving liquids into the best friend he had thought lost to him forever.
Sirius had done little more than eat and sleep for the first week he was in the infirmary, Remus had sat by his side so much that Poppy had finally brought another bed into the quarantine room so that the poor man would at least get some sleep! The deeply etched lines and dark circles around his eyes that had so aged Sirius' once handsome face had begun to fade as the combination of fortified soups and Severus' specially formulated nutrition and strengthening potions began to fill out the skeletally thin frame of the former prisoner. He could now stay awake for longer periods of time each day, and could even sit up when propped up with pillows. His conversations were still mostly one sided but even that was encouraging as he seemed to understand and respond appropriately to questions and conversations.
Severus walked into the infirmary, Shaun holding tightly to his hand as he looked around in wide eyed glances that missed absolutely nothing. Severus leaned down and in a practiced motion, used one strong arm he swept the still small framed child up onto one hip, unconsciously hugging the softly shaking back to his own chest in encouragement, as Shaun held onto his Daddy's neck, his legs tightly gripping his daddy's waist. "Poppy, we're here to assist in bathing Mr. Black as you requested."
"Ah, thank you Severus." She accepted the tray of nutrient and strengthening potions he had grasped firmly in his free hand. "I'm sure that Mr. Black will be much more comfortable having you assist Remus with him than he would be with me doing it!" She smiled and laughed softly.
"Shaun has also expressed a desire to meet his godfather, so I thought we might introduce him, and then if you will watch him while I assist Remus?"
"Of course, of course, he's right in here. I have a bath all ready charmed to stay warm for him and all of the necessities and clean clothes are ready in the washroom for you." She led the two down a short hall next to her office and knocked sharply upon the door. Remus called "Come in." as she was already opening the door.
Sirius' turned from his friend Moony and gasped in shock at the sight of Severus Snape entering his hospital room and growled. "Come to gloat at the decrepit invalid, are we Snape?"
Remus patted Sirius' shoulder in warning, "Paddy, Severus has come at my request to help get you up and into a bath today. He's been making all of the special potions for you to recover. Things have changed greatly while you were gone and Severus Snape is my friend. Please respect that."
Severus came forward into the room fully, "Before you say anything else, Mr. Black, I would like to introduce you to my son, Shaun." The child had his head buried in his father's shoulder and turned his head just enough to peek at the stranger through his flowing shoulder length black hair.
Sirius just gaped, speechless for once before stuttering, "Your...son?"
"Yes, my son, Shaun! I know you do not like me and I cannot say that I like you, but please remain civil in front of my son, he is extremely shy and I would be very…upset…if you were to frighten him unduly." The threat in his words was civil and spoken in a normal tone each word carefully pronounced, but the threat was still there and understood.
Shaun looked back and forth between the two men before looking at his Uncle Moony and Madame Pomfrey for clarification of the adults' moods. He was getting resentment and annoyance off of his daddy; but the stranger, Sirius, was very difficult for him to read anything clearly, his emotions were all jumbled together, but both Moony and Madame Pomfrey were just slightly upset but not angry and no one's emotions were enough to be threatening or even frightening to him.
He had always been able to read his relatives' emotions very clearly, and after a year in the magical castle, surrounded by hundreds of magical beings, his latent empathic abilities were manifesting ever clearer. He was able to be much more precise in reading exactly what people were feeling and evaluating what those emotions meant to his own well being. Of course he didn't know everyone else couldn't read emotions the way that he could, so he never thought of mentioning them to anyone and his daddy and grandfather just thought he was exceptionally good at reading body language and non verbal cues.
Shaun squirmed and climbed down from his daddy's hip and walked carefully over to his Uncle Moony who was sitting in a comfortable chair beside the new man's bed. He reached up both arms and Moony picked him up, unconsciously giving him a hug and a gentle kiss on the top of his coal black hair. The boy leaned forward until he was only inches from Sirius' fathomless grey eyes, his own unusually bright green eyes sparkling brilliantly. He reached out one small hand and brushed the greasy strand of long and tangled black hair off Sirius' cheek. His tiny face crinkled up in thought as he searched his memories, "Padfoot? You took me flying with Daddy James, and Mummy yelled at you and called you a mangy mutt?"
Remus and Severus exchanged meaningful looks of consternation, they had agreed not to tell Sirius yet; that the boy was actually Harry James Potter until he was better recovered and more mentally stable, but it seemed as if Shaun himself had decided that Sirius should know now. Sirius reached up a thin boney finger and ran it down the child's soft cheek, "Harry? Little Prongs? How can it be?" He looked up at his friend, his eyes wide in confusion, "But how can that be, Moony?"
Remus leaned down to whisper into Shaun's ear, "Go find Madame Pomfrey, she's promised to listen to you read a story while your Daddy and I help Padfoot take a bath. He really needs one and he's too sick to take one by himself." Shaun slid off his Uncle's lap and ran out the door, turning to wave and calling out, "Bye Daddy, see you in a little bit." as he ran out to find Poppy. He loved to read aloud to almost anyone who would listen to him and she was always good for a secret chocolate frog or a sucker. Severus shut the door softly behind him and drew up another chair beside Remus so that the bedridden and still incredibly weak man could see both of them without having to turn his head too much.
Remus looked at Severus and raised an eyebrow. Severus sighed and ran his hands through his hair as he scowled, collecting his thoughts before speaking. "I guess I should explain the entire thing rather than just answering that question." Remus reached over and gripped Snape's shoulder in support, the gesture confusing the invalid even further.
"What's going on? Is that your son, Snivellus or is that Harry? I want some answers!"
Severus laughed bitterly, surprising Black mightily, "I haven't heard that name in years! But I must say I much prefer Snape or Professor. Much more dignified don't you think? And the answer is yes. The child is my son and he used to be Harry Potter, but I didn't know that until he had been in my care for almost four months. I will explain if you will not interrupt me." The words lacked the remembered vitriol of the sarcastic man that Black had known before, leaving him even more confused as Remus took his hand and patted it without speaking.
"Calm down, Paddy and let the man explain. It is a strange story and if I hadn't witnessed most of it I wouldn't believe it either. But I trust Severus now with the boy and I even call him my friend. I hope that you can come to call him that too one day."
Severus ran his hand through his hair again and began, "I was all alone in the castle last summer, brewing a potion when I heard a crack and saw a flash of light in the corner of my eye. When I turned around I saw what I thought was a two year old child that was covered in bruises, and cuts most still with fragments of glass shards in them, with a broken right arm and a dislocated left knee. He was so filthy and smelled so bad; I was gagging at the sight and smell. I couldn't even tell if it was a boy or a girl at that point. I bent down to pick him up and he flinched and tried to scoot back so I had to talk soothingly to him for quite a while before I was allowed to even pick him up and begin to heal him. I did what I could and took him in to bathe him. His diaper hadn't been changed in so long that he was bleeding and cracked and had several deep ulcers. His hair was so matted that I almost had to shave his head. And he had multiple deep and bleeding cuts on his head and face, including deep ones on his forehead."
Severus closed his eyes at the remembered pain and anger he had felt at finding the child in that condition. He took several deep breaths to calm himself and continued. "Over the next few days, I talked constantly to the boy as I healed him and began to gain his trust. Finally one day he admitted to me that his name was 'Freak' and I admit I almost lost it! Bollocks, the child didn't even know his own name and had been so abused he would flinch and hide at the slightest loud noise. He followed me around like a shadow, never talking much and just starved for the slightest bit of kindness or affection. I was calling him child while I searched for anyone reporting a missing child. I found nothing and it was almost six weeks of just the two of us in the castle before the rest of the staff returned."
Remus was still holding Severus' shoulder but now he picked up his hand and patted his friend on the back in encouragement and support. "I took him with me to the first staff lunch and he disappeared. He had vanished completely between opening the Great Hall doors and taking three steps inside. My house elf told me he had returned to our room, so Albus checked his Registry of Magical Children, and we sent Minerva and Hestia out to check on muggle born boys the correct age to see if any were missing, but they found nothing wrong. Albus returned with me to my room to ask the boy about his parents and we found that the boy was invisible and soundless to everyone but me."
Sirius looked open mouthed from Severus to Remus who nodded in confirmation. "What do you mean? Invisible, how?" He was having a hard time following the story without interrupting and had been making growls of distress and upset at the very disturbing descriptions of his godson's life and his abominable physical condition. Only the strong hand of Remus' gripping his own hand so tightly had kept him from trying to rush out and find whoever had done those despicable things to a child, his James' child!
"Shh, Sirius, you need to hear the whole story to understand. And yes, no one but Severus and the house elves could see the boy. And they still had no idea who the boy was so Albus just told Severus to name the boy, and consider him his own son until they could find some way to make the child visible. No one thought the Ministry would be capable of handling the situation without further traumatizing the poor child or making him some kind of exhibit at St. Mungo's."
Severus stood up and started to pace back and forth at the foot of the bed, his anguish and anger still apparent even after a year had passed. Remus reached behind Sirius and propped his pillows up higher so he could continue to see Severus as he continued his strange tale.
"Poppy did a physical during the first of August and told us the boy was three and a half or so, and severely abuse, malnourished and neglected. Then the beginning of October, Arabella Figg popped in and told us that Harry Potter and his muggle relatives were missing from their house for over five weeks, but she was positive she had seen Harry on September the second and Shaun had appeared in my lab the last week in June so no one thought it was the same boy. We came to find out that she had seen another boy and thought it was Harry, but the family had moved to Canada in the middle of September and never reported the boy missing to anyone! Arabella had been at her daughter's house for five weeks so no one had reported him missing to the magical community either."
"Well, we shortly figured out that Shaun and Harry are the same person, and because of the abuse and neglect, let alone abandonment; the Dursley's guardianship was terminated. I had been taking care of the boy for over four months, I was the only one who could see or hear him and I wanted to adopt him; so the Ministry granted the adoption. Shaun wanted to keep his name that I had given him, though it is officially Shaun Severus Harry Potter Snape in his adoption paperwork, so if he decides he wants to use the other name at some point he can."
Sirius was shaking his head, "Is this true, Remus? But it still doesn't explain how he was invisible. I just saw him, he's not invisible now!"
Remus began his part of the story, softly speaking in somewhat halting sentences. "No, but he still disappears sometimes, especially when he's upset or frightened, and no; no one, not even Albus Dumbledore, knows how he does it so don't ask. I came to see Severus just before Halloween about a new potion for werewolves that he was developing, and I heard someone calling 'Moony' from the ceiling of the Great Hall during breakfast. Imagine my surprise to look up and find Shaun on his little toy broom zooming over head out of the Great Hall, twenty feet in the air, calling my name and no one is paying him the slightest bit of attention. By the time I had fought my way out and around the corner, he had landed and was running to hug me. He had remembered me, just like he did you. I was holding him when Severus came running down the corridor, frantic and upset about his son and then acting very surprised that I could see and hear the boy. I, of course, didn't know what he was talking about; of course I could see the boy!"
Remus looked at Severus and smiled at the man that had become a friend, "Long story shorter, Albus offered to hire me as a tutor for Shaun while Severus teaches and works on potions. So I have been living in the castle and teaching the boy since last fall. Severus and I have managed to work out a more friendly relationship, of course the fact that no one can yell or get angry around Shaun without sending the child into a full blown panic attack and having he simply disappear and then no one can find him; helps to keep any conversation civil. Oh, and Shaun can apparently apperate within Hogwarts too, although no one knows how he does that either! So not only is he invisible, he can disappear and hide anywhere in the castle which makes it very difficult to find him if he's truly upset or mad."
Severus stopped pacing and looked at the perplexed man lying in the bed. He pursed his lips in thought before turning to Remus, "I think that is enough excitement for now; we will return this evening to help get him up and bathed. Good bye, gentlemen." With a swirl of black robes, the tall, lanky man turned and left the room, shutting the door firmly behind him.
Remus stood up and moved to sit beside his friend on the edge of his bed, reaching out to enfold the much too thin frame into his embrace as he held his best friend, talking softly into the dirty hair until Sirius was asleep once again. They would talk a little more each time that Sirius was awake that day and Remus knew that eventually he would be able to convince Sirius Black that Severus Snape really was Harry Potter's father.
AN: Sorry for the short chapter, but this seemed the logical stopping place and I have to catch up with real life now. I did want to post something this week though so here it is! I never did get picked for a jury but it still eats up all your time, and the laundry and house just wait for you to return!