Growing Up Snape
By Teacherbev
AN: This story will not make much sense unless you read "Snape's Invisible Friend" before reading this. The story begins directly after the conclusion of SIF, summer 1985, just before Shaun/Harry turns five.
AN: I will answer questions if you will leave them in a review for me, and I thank all of you who have read and reviewed all of my stories. I appreciate each and every one of you (well maybe not the flamers).
AN: I am excited, my very first story, Harry Potter and the Guardians of Power, has been nominated at for a Quills Harry Potter Fan Fiction contest under the action/adventure heading at http/ www. geocities. com /dragonhidequills/main.html ( Just remove the spaces, for some reason ff will not download a link here). Please read it and vote for it. And thanks for all of those who have added my stories and my author name to their favorites and their c2 groups! Makes writing much more meaningful and fun when I know people like it.
5: Fights and Furies
It was another two days before Severus managed to calm his temper down enough to go back to help Remus get Sirius up and bathed. It was better that they used cleaning spells even though they weren't as effective. But he finally felt able to help Remus without drowning the blasted mutt instead of helping him. But there was no way he was taking Shaun down there before the man was a little more emotionally stable. The night that he had found out that Severus had adopted Shaun, or Harry as he insisted in calling him, he had tried to get Remus to wait until Severus was asleep and go and kidnap Harry so they could run off and raise him themselves. And this from a man that couldn't even walk to the loo by himself! No; Shaun would not be visiting that mutt, Black, again anytime soon, that's for sure.
This time he had enlisted Albus Dumbledore as a babysitter since Poppy had been called to the village of Hogsmeade for an emergency delivery. He hated to leave Shaun with his 'grandfather' because there was no telling what the 'barmy old coot' would let his son do or eat. Last time he had left Shaun with Albus the boy had been awake until almost midnight on a pure sugar high and had been whinny and tired for three days afterwards. And what adult in their right mind let a four year old play catch the snitch in their office full of breakable objects? Oh, Albus, adult, and right mind didn't go together at all. But it was that or Hagrid, someone who might think nothing of taking Shaun into the forest to investigate some 'innerestin' creature. With Professor Kettleburn on a prolonged vacation to South America finding a supposedly new species of winged frog, Hagrid was in charge of caring for the castle's multitude of different and distinctly unusual species that lived on the extensive grounds and in the Forbidden Forest.
Of course, he could leave the poor boy with Sybil Trelawney, but since Shaun refused to become visible whenever the disgusting fraud was around he didn't think that would work out too well for either of them. He still suspected that Shaun had been responsible for the Divination teacher going bonkers at breakfast last Halloween. She had managed to wind up sliding down the Gryffindor table on her stomach, platters and dishes of food and drinks flying like missiles all over the Gryffindors. When the other houses started laughing it had set off the biggest food fight that the castle had ever seen. And Trelawney hadn't stepped foot in the Great Hall for a meal since; so it had turned out all right in the end. He still cherished the memory of Minerva with a bowl of porridge on her head and Albus drenched in pumpkin juice with fried eggs dripped down his beard.
So he was stuck with Albus as a babysitter. And because Albus was expecting several very important fire calls, he had taken Shaun up to his office and left him, hoping Albus' office was still standing when he returned to pick up the boy much later. Hopefully the old man had learned from the last time and would stick to the activities that Severus had provided in the bag he had packed for them. He had also promised dire consequences if Albus tried to supplement the snacks he had ordered Nippy to bring to them while he was busy for the next hour or so.
As Severus made his way down to the infirmary, already upset about the way the day was turning out, he stopped by their quarters to change to an older robe and changed out of his favorite boots. No use wearing anything that he would get upset over if it got wet or ruined. He was still thinking up punishments to inflict upon Black if he didn't cease and desist in his foolish belief that he could raise Shaun better than Severus. And each scenario became more creative and bizarre as he finally reached the ward. He took a deep, cleansing breath and occluded his emotions for the task ahead as he opened the door to the quarantine room inside the infirmary and entered.
Shaun was sitting peacefully on his 'Grandpa Albus'' lap, reading his favorite Potions for Children book to the old man. Fawkes was sleeping peacefully, his scarlet feathers fluffed and lifted to air out from his earlier flight in the light summer rain. Shaun loved to read aloud as much as Albus loved to have him sit on his lap, his quiet childish voice making very few mistakes as he read books that were intended for children at least eight or nine years old.
"Then add two drams of pomegranate juice; stir six times counterclockwise and have your adult helper turn up the fire to simmer." Shaun was reading when he sat straight up and dropped the book from his lap. He looked upset as he simply vanished from the old wizard's lap in a soft puff of displaced air. Albus stood up and called for the child several times before yelling "Nippy!"
"Yes, Headmaster, what can Nippy be doing for you today, sir?" The Snape's personal house elf was bowing with his large ears almost touching the floor. Albus waved for him to stand up and asked, "Can you sense Shaun in the castle? He disappeared but I don't think he became invisible. At least I hope that he didn't." The bond between Master and house elf allowed Nippy to sense where all of his master's family was at all times, but the bond was apparently disrupted when Shaun became invisible and it distressed all of the elves when that happened.
"Yes, Headmaster, sir. Shaun he is being in the hospital wing now, and he is not being invisible, sir. Is there anything else Nippy can be helping Headmaster, sir with?" Nippy didn't appear to be too upset so perhaps Shaun had just popped down to be near his father. When Shaun had first appeared to Severus he had been unwilling to be separated from him at all, but after a year he would now part from his father for longer and longer periods of time. But anytime that Shaun felt insecure or frightened, he would disappear and reappear wherever his father was. It was really quite disconcerting, Albus thought to himself as he trudged down the staircases to the infirmary, running his mind over the last few minutes and deciding he was absolutely clueless about what had triggered the boy's disappearance. He sure hopped that Shaun outgrew the extreme reaction to emotional upsets soon. It continued to cause problems whenever he disappeared like today. Though Albus admitted it could certainly come in handy if the boy ever got into real trouble that he couldn't handle or if the remaining death eaters found him or Merlin forbid, Voldemort managed to acquire a corporeal body somehow!
The noise of the two men bellowing at each other was audible before Albus even opened the large double doors that guarded the entrance to the hospital. He stopped, upset and stunned at the sight that greeted him, his eyes losing their trademark twinkle as his face paled and then began to glow with suppressed power as he ascertained the situation in front of him. On the floor outside the closed door to the quarantine room that currently housed Sirius Black; Shaun was curled into a small ball on the floor. His thin arms were covering his face in protection while both hands were clasped tightly over his ears. Fawkes had apparently arrived before the headmaster and he was perched on the shaking child, his wings spread out over his back in a protective blanket of brilliantly hued scarlet feathers as he trilled a song; trying unsuccessfully to comfort and calm the violently trembling boy.
"He's my SON…"
"He's my GODSON…"
"I will decide who he sees and when he…"
"James and Lily named ME not YOU…"
Severus and Sirius were both bellowing so loudly and ferociously that neither was even listening to what the other was saying. Albus could hear the third voice of Remus, seemingly pleading so softly that only intermittent snatches of his voice could be heard when the irate screamers stopped just long enough to breathe before continuing their bellicose ranting.
Albus seemed to grow taller as he strode rapidly toward the closed door of the quarantine room, his eyes glowing brilliant clear blue, his whole body radiating visible power in his outrage at the behavior of the two men, supposedly adults! And when he radiated power like this it was easy to see why people claimed the only one that Voldemort had ever been afraid of was Albus Dumbledore, the most powerful wizard of the century!
"ENOUGH!" Albus yelled as he threw open the door so abruptly the doorknob cracked loudly against the wall and left a round spider webbed circle of destruction behind. "LOOK AT WHAT YOU ARE DOING!" He pointed one knobby finger out the now open door and down at the pitiful heap that was the terrified child, remarkably still visible. Fawkes flew up to the end of the nearest bed and continued to trill loudly, hoping in vain to calm down the two angry men in the little room.
Remus was standing; arms outstretched holding an angry man at bay with each hand. The three stopped instantly and looked at where Albus was pointing. Severus ran, dropping to the floor as he reached his son. He snatched Shaun up, distraught as he tried to uncurl the tightly balled boy. "I'm sorry, Shaun, so sorry. I didn't know you were here, I thought you were up in Grandpa's office. Shh, child it's all right. Daddy's not mad at you, Daddy loves you very much, child." Severus was still down sitting back on his heels, rocking back and forth as he attempted to calm his very frightened son, alternately clutching him tightly and rubbing his back while bestowing soft kisses on the child's bent head. Shaun was sobbing and visibly shaking as he tried to overcome and disperse the waves of raw emotion that he had felt clear up in the Headmaster's tower.
Sirius had dropped down onto the bed behind him, so drained and emotionally spent that he was shaking in reaction to the adrenaline that still coursed through his veins from the intense argument he had been having with Snape just moments ago. Remus and Albus were watching the two Snapes in silence, both of them glaring disgusted looks between the two men while they hoped that Shaun would recover soon. But their hopes were dashed as, with a shimmer of flickering light, Shaun disappeared from view, still curled up tightly in a quivering ball. An anguished heart breaking cry broke from the throat of the man still on the floor as he was suddenly holding nothing. Shaun had disappeared once more.
Shaun reappeared in a place that had come to mean comfort to him over the last year, his daddy's potions lab. The familiar smells and sights with the softly bubbling cauldrons of various potions typified his father and the safety and comfort he normally felt from the man. Here his daddy talked softly to him as he watched him create miraculous potions. He had first appeared here, his daddy had healed him here, and it was here that he felt closest to the man who had rescued him from his abusive and neglectful relatives and given him a new home. Unfortunately, he was still curled into a ball and misjudged where he should land so he wound up on top of a tall wooden work table instead of on the floor like he had meant to. With a thud, a tinkle of glass, and then the horrifying sound of something hitting the floor and smashing, Shaun landed, still invisible, curled in a fetal ball and trembling from the onslaught of emotions, not all of them his own.
His mind whirled with tempestuous thoughts and emotions, finally able to begin to sort out his own from the emotionally charged ones belonging to the four highly agitated men. Daddy was furious and terribly frightened with something to do with him, Uncle Moony had been very angry at both men and highly frustrated, and Mr. Black's emotions swung between despair, anger, pain and guilt so wildly that it was difficult to tell exactly what he was feeling from one moment to the next. Then Grandpa had been absolutely livid at Daddy and Mr. Black, but only distressed and worried about how he would react. The emotions in the hospital wing had overpowered even the calming effect that Fawkes had always had on him.
As he began to push the emotions that didn't belong to him out of his head, he became more and more worried about what he had inadvertently done to his daddy's potion lab. Daddy still got furious and yelled loudly at any student who broke things in the classroom and he knew his daddy was much more protective of his private lab than he ever was about the classroom. Shaun didn't want his daddy to yell at him and threaten to send him away from the castle because he had broken and messed up his daddy's potions ingredients.
He uncurled in the silence as his disorganized thoughts calmed down more with each minute, thankful that the terrifying emotions he had sensed pouring out of the hospital wing had stopped and his stomach was finally unclenching from the overflow of negative emotions that had overwhelmed him. He opened his eyes and began hyperventilating as he talked softly to himself, 'Oh no, I broke some of Daddy's ingredients, he never allows me in here by myself and he was so mad at Mr. Black. Now he's going to be that mad at me, what can I do, what can I do?'
He scooted over to the edge of the table and hung by his fingers, he was just tall enough for his tip toes to reach the floor and he carefully climbed down. He started to pick up the things he had knocked off the table in his landing. 'Dragon's blood, pickled frog spleen, snail snot, werewolf spit, they all seem to be okay' He picked up and cleaned each container as he read the label to himself. 'Yecch, I hope these aren't in my nutrient potion, no wonder it tastes so bad!' Everything had been returned except for one large silver lid and a lot of glass splinters covered in dark grey ashes. 'Salamander ash, oh no, I remember daddy complaining to Moony about the cost of that going up. He's going to be so mad.' He hadn't thought that his Daddy would hit him, but he had never seen him so mad like today. His Daddy's face didn't turn purple like his Uncle's used to, but it was bright red and he had felt the waves of hatred and anger flowing in the hospital clear through the closed doors and clear up in Grandpa's office. 'If Daddy finds this and he's already mad at Mr. Black; he might hit me or worse, make me leave and go back to the Dursley's!' His thoughts were getting more chaotic and panicky as he continued to work himself up into a full blown panic attack.
'I know where Daddy keeps jars like this, I could just put the label on a new jar and he'd never know it, but what could I fill it with? I wonder, fireplace ash; that would work! No, the elves cleaned that last night and I can't make a fire." He was climbing up into a storage cabinet, reaching down a large empty jar and removing the old label as his mind whirled. He carefully took the label and pressed it down carefully so that it was even and straight. 'Ashes, ashes, where can I get ashes?' With a soft cry he remembered putting all of Fawkes' ashes in his robe pocket when he had made a nest for the bird on the floor of his wardrobe. He hoped the ashes were still there, after all Nippy had been told by his Daddy that he wasn't to clean the boy's room, that was Shaun's responsibility and he didn't remember cleaning the ashes out of that pocket when he had hung his green robe up after Grandpa had reclaimed Fawkes the next day.
'Here's the right robe, yes! It's still full of ashes!' He carefully scooped out the ashes from his robe pocket and filled the round glass container with the ashes. Sticking his tongue out of the corner of his mouth in concentration, his forehead furrowed in concentration, he managed to get the lid on straight and turned it as tight as his small fingers could make it. He had just placed the jar on the table with the other ingredients and used the small broom and dust pan to clean up all the mess on the floor, before he heard his father come crashing through the doors to their quarters, running footsteps coming closer every second. Shaun knew he wasn't supposed to be in his Daddy's lab, he could still feel anger radiating off of his father so he did the only thing he thought he could do; he left again!
Severus was so angry at himself for losing his temper at that imbecile mutt that he was having a terrible time calming himself down, but he knew he couldn't approach Shaun in his emotionally charged state. He knew that, but he was so worried that he ran to their quarters anyway, hoping the boy had not made himself invisible to him as well as everyone else. Shaun had never disappeared from Severus' sight, but he was afraid this might be the first time! Why had that moron not understood what they had told him yesterday! He hit the doors to their quarters much harder than he wanted to; making the solid oak doors slam as he ran into Shaun's bedroom, hoping the boy was there. Nothing, he searched their entire apartment and found nothing. "Nippy!" He finally yelled when he had run out of places to search.
"Yes, Master Snape?" Nippy looked a little put out with his master, in fact, he looked at the man with disapproval clearly on his odd little face. And Severus had never heard his family's old retainer speak so coldly to any of his masters before.
"Do you know where Shaun is, Nippy?" Severus was pacing, running a worried hand over and over through his long stringy hair, not caring that it was now sticking up in every direction.
"No, Master. Shaun is invisible, but Nippy was feeling how upset young Master was in the hospital. Young Master is feeling that Master will be hitting him like old Uncle did. Young Master is not wanting to be found, he is fearing you, Master Snape!"
Severus sank into a soft armchair and dropped his head into both hands, a shudder shaking his shoulders as he finally calmed his anger and replaced it with shame and regret, along with his worry. "I'm sorry Nippy. I know I frightened Shaun, but you must believe me, I would never hit Shaun, and in fact I thought he was clear up in Albus' office and couldn't hear us at all!"
Nippy shook his head in bewilderment; he would never understand these wizards even if he lived to be four hundred years old! "I is knowing that, Master Snape, but Young Master is not. And I cannot feel him anywhere in the castle or the grounds. Nippy will have the other elves look for Young Master; we are hoping he wants to be seen soon!" With another wild shake of his head, he bowed once more and popped out of sight.
The afternoon passed in a frantic search for the four year old, but no one had any luck finding him. Remus had been irate at Sirius for blowing up at Severus and starting a huge argument that he had absolutely no hope of winning. All of Sirius' energy had been sucked out of him in his emotional outburst and he had collapsed into an exhausted sleep. After Sirius' was deeply asleep, Remus had felt free to called a house elf to watch him as he joined the others in their search of the castle; opening every door and calling for the small frightened and bewildered boy.
Hagrid burst into the entrance hall and called out to Severus who was re-searching the Great Hall once more, looking under the house tables, into corners and up over the rafters. "Eh, Perfes'r. I found me a big spot o' blood under the Whompin' Willah. The Thestrals was lickin' its how I noticed. Do yuh know what made it?" Severus called over his shoulder to the nearest portrait, "Tell the Headmaster and the others to meet me at the Whomping Willow! Follow me, Hagrid!" He ran down the stone steps, his black robes bellowing out behind him as he ran, calling "Shaun, Shaun, are you here, son?"
His feet nearly flew as he crossed the wide yard and stopped just short of the reach of the deadly branches. He warily eyed the single Thestral who was greedily licking at a large spot of red that had spread over the pounded, barren soil under the deadly tree. The tree was leaving the beast alone, but rattled its branches threateningly as Severus tried to step closer to investigate. He had to stay a goodly distance back from the potentially deadly branches as he called hopefully, "Shaun, child are you there? I need you to let me see you, child, please let Daddy see you." His voice cracked with emotion as he continued to call, ignoring the pounding of feet coming up behind him. Albus and Remus added their pleas to Severus' and watched above the bloody puddle in hope and fear. It was a rather large puddle and now that the shy Thestral had left, they could see there were still large drips coming from directly above it, drip…drip…drip…
Poppy was tired and sweaty but happy that Mrs. Golden had been successfully delivered of her new baby boy and that everything was all right. The child had decided to come feet first so the Hogsmeade midwife had made a frantic call to Madame Pomfrey to do the delivery. She thought about stopping at the Three Broomsticks for some of Rosemerta's delicious fish and chips and a cold butter beer, but with Sirius still in the infirmary she really should be getting back to Hogwarts. He still needed multiple potions each day and close monitoring after that horrendous stay in Azkaban. Just the thought of that place made her shiver.
She left the last houses behind her and turned toward the large iron gates that had meant home to her since she first entered at the age of eleven years old, oh so many years ago. She knew she could have been a very successful Mediwitch at St. Mungo's and perhaps even Head Healer on a specialty ward by this point, but after seeing her little brother suffering so after being hit by a stray bludger in a Quidditch game and then almost die before they could get him to St. Mungo's she had vowed to provide all of Hogwarts' children with the finest care available. And she had kept her vow for all of these years!
The glorious sight of the castle, blue skies just starting to darken toward sunset was a sight she never grew tired of, even if she was tired herself. She was looking forward to a quiet evening with a nice cup of tea and that new wizarding romance novel that Minerva had passed on to her. She stopped and listened. 'Had she heard voices shouting?' She turned her head towards the sound; it was coming from the direction of the Whomping Willow!
Drawing on a reserve of energy she hadn't know she had, she shouldered her medi-bag more comfortably on her shoulder and took off running towards the distant shouts.
Poppy skidded to a halt, breathless and stunned at the sight before her. Severus had anguish and guilt showing unabashedly on his face; Albus and Remus were also calling clearly distressed and desperate, and neither seemed to be in much better shape emotionally than the openly distraught father. There was a growing puddle of blood spreading on the ground below the Whomping Willow and the tree was swirling and thrashing so hard that no one could approach it! Remus had a long stick and was attempting to push in the knot that would freeze the tree, but the limbs were moving so hard and fast that he couldn't reach it. The flailing branches swatted every attempt the werewolf made to reach the magical spot. Hagrid was off to the side, holding back a very large Thestral and blubbering into his beard.
She touched Albus on the shoulder, "What's going on here, Albus? Whose blood is that on the ground?" Because she could see no one and the obviously emotional wreck that was the normally stoic Severus Snape; she was almost afraid to hear the answer.
"We cannot be positive, but we suspect it is young Shaun. Severus and Sirius had a very loud argument and Shaun went invisible. We have searched for several hours until Hagrid noticed the blood there."
Poppy harrumphed, reached down and picked up a large rock, and using all the skills gained in her own years as a Quidditch chaser, threw it at the knot with all the strength and accuracy she could muster. With a dead hit, the tree froze and Severus ran forward, climbing quickly up to the branch they believed held his son, his long black robes billowing out behind him as his long legs deftly moved from branch to branch, ever higher up the tree until he was directly over the puddle on the ground. "He's here and he's breathing, but he feels cold and limp. His breathing is as labored as it was when he was poisoned and then later with the pneumonia. I can't see him either." He admitted; frustration plain in his voice as he reported to the medi-witch and the Headmaster below him.
Hagrid let go of the Thestral with a slap to the rump to send him back into the forest and ran forward to reach up for Severus' precious cargo. He was tall enough to just reach with his arms stretched out over his head, pulling the invisible child near to his chest in protection as he ran him over to Poppy.
Severus shimmied down the tree like an accomplished tree climber and ran to kneel with the others around Poppy. He was afraid to ask her how he was, but he had to. "Poppy, how is he?" She was waving her wand up and down a patch of dirt, muttering under her breath. Without stopping she started issuing orders to Severus, "In my bag, I need two blood replenishers, a pain reliever, a fever reducer, and a pepper up potion. It looks like he was struck by a large branch that hit him in his lower ribs and abdomen. Luckily, his ribs stopped most of the internal damage, but we'll have to heal them later. Too bad he's too young for skele-gro. But he's going into shock from blood loss from the bruising and his liver is bleeding from the blows he received."
"Two blood replenishers, Poppy, isn't he too young for that much?" Severus was handing her potions and then taking the empty vials back as she fed them to his son. Now he knew what the others had gone through when they couldn't see Shaun, it was disconcerting to see a potion just disappear in mid air!
"We'll have to closely monitor him, but he's lost so much blood that he was going into shock so we'll have to risk it. Here, Severus he will feel most comfortable with you carrying him up to the hospital. But be careful, he has three broken ribs on the left side, the right side is just bruised, thank Merlin!" Remus took off his faded and patched brown robe and wrapped the invisible figure in it before Poppy handed the bundle to his distraught father and the distress and grief filled group made their way slowly back to the castle, Albus supporting Severus' elbow on one side and Remus on the other as they walked, keeping the swiftly walking man from stumbling with his precious burden, as they crossed the grounds, entered the castle and began the seemingly interminable climb to the fourth floor.
AN: Life is almost back to normal so I should be able to update in a couple of days, thanks for the encouragement, you keep me cranking out new chapters with your reviews. Remember to check out Guardians of Power and vote for your favorite!