Reflections inthe Heart

By BloodyChaosDragonKnight

Disclaimer: I don't own FF9, I own my muses and my sword, that's it peoples.

A/N:.It's 1AM in the morning and I've somehow managed to get in Kuja's head while trying to write the next chapter of Diamond Heart...and the sad thing is, this Kuja doesn'teven exist in Diamon Heart...

Warnings: This could be taken as Kuja/Zidane...

Twisted Reflection (Kuja)

As a child I used to spend hours upon hours in the library, learning new spells, studying the history of Terra, devouring all the knowledge the world of books had to offer me. I suppose in a way you could say that I was raised by those books, seing as how Garland didn't give a damn about me so long as I was powerful enough to wreak havoc on Gaia when I was older. Those books were my parents, teaching me everything I needed to know. Not that Garland ever thought I needed to know anything other than how to kill.

I used to bring a book out with me and sit on the banks of the lake in the center of Bran Bal, reading as my souless siblings wandered about the village doing various menial tasks. None ever acknowledged my presence other than to walk around me, but sometimes when there was nothing for them to do I would catch one or two staring at me with those empty eyes something deeply hidden glimmering in those depths and for a single moment I could pretend that they had souls and truly were my brothers and sisters who cared deeply for me, but then they would look away and whatever it was would disappear and I would return to being the only real person in a village of dolls.

Once though I had someone who truly cared for me, a child barely able to walk and talk who followed me around with stars in his eyes. A cheerful child comparable to the ones I had caught rare glimpses of on Gaia before terror and death overcame them...I found myself watching him as he tried to talk to the other genomes and something in me twisted. I watched him wandering the souless village looking like a lost kitten and I felt an ache in my chest. I watched him come to the verge of becoming like myself and something in me broke. I took him with me to Gaia on a trip, a trip from which he never returned, having 'accidentally' fallen out of the Invincible and onto the doorstep of a theatre company that took in orphan children, no matter what the race.

Garland was furious with me. I could've cared less for that thing that Gaian's called a heart remained with that small boy wherever he was, whatever he did. From that moment on I needed no one but myself, I cared for no one but myself. From that moment on I felt nothing but a rage that was soothed only by the slaughter of countless Gaians. From that moment on I was as you see me today...

And you people wonder why I'm so twisted.

TBC?

BloodyChaos: "That is so...twisted."

Zach: "What in the hell are you running on?"

BloodyChaos: "Seven cups of coffee...Well good night folks I'm off to bed, I promise to have the next chapter of Diamond Heart up as soon as I write it. Leave me a review or two if you please."