The magic rushed through her and she knew it was different this time. It felt as if it were pulling at her, taking more than she had offered and she wondered what was happening.
All she could do was wait and remain standing as it surged and then began to ebb. Old blood magics like this were dangerous, you couldn't stop them. This one shouldn't take more than she had to give. She was healthy and whole, excepting the magic it was pulling at now. The remnants of Bellatrix Lestrange's magics that were wrapped around her womb.
She couldn't feel anything but the pull. The pull on her core through her menstrual blood and the way the ritual magic was pulling on the contamination. As it began to ebb and she felt the air on her skin and could see the rising sunlight spilling over the treetops, she felt hopeful. Drained and restless too. She could feel the cotton robes against her skin and knew that her body wanted him. It wasn't as uncomfortable as it had been at the Dale last time she did a ritual but she knew her face was as bright a red as it could get. The soft pop of an elf nearby nearly went unnoticed but the feel of soft fabric against her bare calves sent goosebumps racing over her skin.
With a small smile, she sat on the wide cushion with her legs folded to the side and watched the light change as the sun got higher and the clouds roll down from the mountains. It would rain today. Not immediately but she could feel it and wondered at her knowing. The magics around her hummed lowly and she tried not to think about the bigger things. The things that lurked in her mind.
Instead she thought of the spring and pictured the blue being brighter and the clouds lighter. Tried to imagine the browns and greys being taken over by greens. Inside this grove she couldn't see the valleys of fields but she knew some of them. Having walked through valley floors and climbed some of the rocky outcrops that rose in the parts that brushed the closest mountain.
One of those had turned out to be almost a cottage cut into the stone and nearly invisible. She didn't explore more than checking it was all locked before heading back down, it was hard not to though. This place was so different from the Dale.
Hermione had spent a year and a half climbing its hills and swimming in its rivers and lakes. Even flying over the trees a few times when there was no one there to see her, trying to find some connection to that place. It was beautiful and the harvest ritual had helped but this place felt more approachable. Harder too, more rugged, and more of working around the landscape instead of shaping it to your will. Flying would be the only way to get to somewhere she hadn't been and that was not a happy thought. She would have to get better or find a solution, lessons maybe or something.
For the first time she wanted to survey. Cast a bubblehead charm on a clear day and see how far she could see before the inevitable clouds rolled in. The whole place was like a lower area in a mountain range.
Huge towering spires of rock and snow could be seen all around them in the distance. It was stark in a way and also mellowed. The lower mountains closest were rounder and trees were everywhere. It was only the valleys that were truly cultivated but she was sure much of it was harvested or had been at one time. Many had once lived here. A huge family and their retainers, that's how she thought of it, hidden away in the mountains and in a muggle protected parkland. She wondered if any had come here or even gotten close to the wards, probably at some point.
Time passed as she heard the sounds of the forest around her change. Day was here and the birds sang different songs and small sounds of branches in the breeze filtered through. When she stood the cushion vanished and she quietly said thank you into the air then slowly walked up out of the grove. Finally feeling the low temperatures affect her and looking for signs of spring.
Wandlessly, she cast a warming charm on her feet and hands then carried on. Not ready to leave here and knowing she would be alone for the rest of today. When she turned a corner and could see the top corner of the Tower and she made a decision.
"Patter. Thank you. Could you bring me my clothes." The elf was there and gone before being back a second later and then snapped her fingers and Hermione just tried to smile and thanked the elf. Wishing she would ask before doing those things, her fault for calling.
Warm and comfortable in muggle sweats and a hoodie, she walked the trails and paths until abruptly the trail created a rise she was in the low bowl surrounding the house, the Tower. It was dark red rock and had four layers of decreasing size before it rose to what looked to be two floors in the same smaller circumference. The main doors were on the other side and so she was facing a pretty brick terrace that fanned out from the three doors that lead into this courtyard area. Stone benches and raised beds made a pattern and she was sure it would show differently from the air.
This time she looked at the windows and tried to see things about the place, more than its raw red stone and stark lines. The first thing she noticed were the lintels. Most were carved and it looked detailed. The she walked along the three sets of doors and tried to imagine the layout of this place.
Narcissa has been renovating the Manor and she had been in several huge homes in the last year but this was different. She couldn't imagine how the rooms connected inside and what would be in what space. Each of the three layers above her had terraces and stairs that formed some visual interest as they funnelled down.
The Dale had sections of the lower floor that interconnected to form the public rooms and then parts that were the family area and those more easily led up into the family quarters on the floors above. They didn't use the top one of the four there. Here it must be different and she was curious. Not curious enough to go in but she thought that feeling was good. It meant she did want to go in one day and that was relieving.
Merlin and Morgana. The witch looked like she was glowing and had gorgeous colour on her cheeks. She was wearing a thick dark purple sweater that suited her and a pair of those muggle denims. He had seen them in pictures but she hadn't worn them here until now or her coat had covered them. She smiled at him and it was tentative but he couldn't see any reluctance.
This was unexpected, her demeanour and that she didn't seem upset. Which both of them had expected after her last visit with Josh. His friend had been angry and hurt. It had taken a long time to figure out what was happening. Never had he seen his friend so reluctant to speak. It was about feelings though and Josh didn't deal well with them, or lack of control and both were in play now.
He watched her walk toward the chair then fold her coat up and sit on it, that made him smile. These weren't comfortable chairs and she wiggled a bit when she sat down and then lifted her ever present folder and put it on the table.
Then she looked at him and he was sure something was different. It wasn't obvious but in her eyes there seemed to be a lot. The witch didn't look upset at a closer range either.
"Here is her letter and some pictures from Christmas and even one I got from Claudia of them at school." The witch said quietly, and for the first time he didn't want to look away from her to read the letter right now. He did though and noticed it was shorter again.
'Thor,
How are you? I've been wondering more about you. Instead of worrying so much and I'm curious. Curious about what you think about and what you hope for. I know you do have dreams, even if you won't tell me what they are.
I'm doing well and NEWT's are coming up so that is keeping me busy. Claudia and I have been taking long walks on the grounds, except when it's a blizzard out there. I'm leaving here this year and am glad of it. The small things I love about the castle are easy to see now. I enjoy the same portraits and jump the tricks steps with a smile or impatience. Just like before. Before everything happened. It did happen though and I'm not glad of it but can appreciate some things.
It's how I got here, to this place.
Christmas was good and it felt comfortable. Less like some kind of dream and it's only one more before you are there too.
I miss you, at those times especially. I can see where you will fit into some conversations or things you would laugh at. I can tell Hermione has been thinking and making some decisions. Nothing overt or alarming but she has spoken differently of the house and our plans for next year, or she has started talking about them and that's a change.
I asked her if she would find me something to do part time this summer and she has owled some ideas. I don't know if I want to be away from home though. I'm always away or leaving and it's hard. She isn't alone and she wants me to do things but she is alone in a way. Everyone has people and so does she but she doesn't have her own person. I can't explain it but maybe you will see when you are with us.
She went to the Tower. Has been several times now I think and has written a little about the mountains and the valleys. A tree she found that would be perfect for a swing. It's different and I think it's promising. For you, for us. Nott is not in her good graces, I'm not sure if you wondered about that and she won't mention it.
Not as much has changed. In me or in what is happening around us, our immediate family. Hermione will show you the pictures and I hope they reassure you that we are alright. Waiting and hoping but alright.
I love you.
Sabrina
He read it twice and then looked at her. She was looking down, she always did when he read Sabrina's letters. The curtain of her hair covered most of her face and she was still. He slipped it into the envelope and her head came up as she reached for it and placed it in the folder.
"She sounds good. Settled." He said and watched her smile. A satisfied one and he appreciated her respect for his opinion of his sister, that she wanted his opinion and trusted it.
"She is doing so well. Not as scared of exams and more confident. Her goal for this year was to think about things before saying no. Not that she wanted to do everything but to not just automatically say no. It's been good for her though, and she has been very selective. She went to the valentines Hogsmeade weekend with Camden Wood and had a good time. Didn't say yes when he asked her this time though. Claudia wrote me that she thinks Rina likes him but doesn't want to. That's understandable for now and exams are enough of an excuse she says. I'm glad she did go. He asked her four times before this and has been a gentleman by everyone's measure. Came up and spoke to the whole group of us at The Dragon. All of us." He watched her face and listened to her report. It was a report but it was all filled with emotion and tone that told more of the story. Her tone said it was not a trifling group to encounter, for a young lad they knew was pursuing Sabrina. He couldn't help the grin as he asked the obvious question, who.
"The Black sisters. Blaise, Draco, and me. Harry and Ginny. Kingsley was there and Pansy. Daphne and her mother as well as it being Warrington's debut with us. Do you know about that?" She asked him and he shook his head. Warrington. Hadn't even heard his name for years now. It was amusing to watch her emotions shift and see her jump topics.
"People know they are together now. No one knows they are betrothed though. It was crazy. She just told me one night in the fall and I was shocked. They signed the agreements easter break of the year of hell and then he left. Seems like he had to but no one knew. Anyways he came back just before New Years and they've been dating or spending time together. Whatever. That was his first public outing with us." He could tell from her tone that this had been totally unexpected. He didn't know what to say to that either.
"Just came back now?" He asked her. Deciding it was a safe question and he could tell the situation was relevant to her, or important.
"Yes. He had written every month but she just said no she wasn't ready. Then she was or realised she wanted to be. Pans is complicated. My issues are mostly known. In my circle at least but literally no one knew. And then he was here and still only Blaise and I knew. We needed him for security reasons so he was aware. That was so weird and then one by one he met people and he's around quite a bit now. Another Slytherin to dither over our safety." He could tell she didn't mean the last dig but he wanted to know some things.
"Sabrina wrote you went to the Tower." He said and watched her carefully. Watched her bite her lip and blush then she met his eyes squarely and he knew she was going to be straight with him. Maybe not tell him everything but something and he tried not to shift in his anticipation. Sabrina's words were running through his mind.
"Yes. I've been a few times now. I don't know what to say first or how to explain some things. I did the harvest ritual at the Dale. I learned a lot and am more comfortable there now. A bit anyways. Then I did the spring ritual in the grove at the Tower." There was so much in her voice. Hesitancy lasted through all those words though and he wondered why she sounded so uncertain. He could only nod once and she knew he was listening intently. Eagerly even though he tried not to show that.
"It was so different. The whole feeling of the place and the protected grove as opposed the open bare hilltop. It was intense. I was surprised at the pull. The length and strength of the magic's pull. I wasn't drained but it was far more than the fall ritual. I haven't gone in though I have walked around." She spoke with so much emotion and he had a hundred questions. No idea how to ask any of them though. She was Gryffindor and he was sure she wouldn't be upset at his asking, so he would just try and phrase them respectfully and ignore his own reactions to whatever she did say.
"How did you find out about the grove?" It seemed a safe question to start with but the colour was brighter on her cheeks if anything. What would have caused that? This wasn't funny but it was amusing to see her flustered. She had mostly been in control around him since the war was over.
"The autumn ritual had the desired affect fertility wise and we discovered the Rites didn't like it. Or that's how I think of it. The magic didn't seem diminished in any way but the Rites made sure I wasn't getting satisfied any other way." Now he understood her blush and couldn't help reacting. Images flickered through his mind and then he felt bad. A slight cringe must have shown on his face and she stilled.
"I'm sorry about that. I've read about the pull and I'm sorry. Not even yourself?" As soon as he said it, he knew it had been the wrong thing to say but he couldn't help it. Her reaction though was less angry than he expected. She huffed and then chuckled lowly.
"No. You are as straightforward as Draco said. Not a very Slytherin trait." He cringed again at that and she sobered.
"It wasn't as bad at the Tower. The rights didn't tug as hard at the pull. If that makes any sense. So that's when I asked for the journal, last fall. Or I asked for anything someone who had done this had written and Patter brought Celeste's journal. She had four years of rituals and the rights but only the last ritual was after he came of age. Cradle robbing but they were happy with the situation as far as the journal goes. I just finished it." He could only sit back and look at her. That explained the glow and the flush when she came in. He wanted to ask if there were other effects from the Rites. If Sabrina was coming next time then he might see her once more before he was getting out.
"The pull isn't to me is it?" He decided this was the safest way to ask and she thought about that. He watched her tilt her chin a bit and consider. Then look at him and really look at him. He couldn't help liking it. Wondering what she thought of him. Of his home, it's magics and how it felt there.
"No. I can feel the tug. It's as strong as it usually is now but not to you. Maybe the Tower a bit. I feel like something is far away. I'm glad it's not to you in this situation." Instead of the thoughtful way she had spoken her answer, the last was a clear admittance and he nodded, understanding.
"There is something I want to ask you." He sat up straighter at the tone of her voice.
"Yeah." Was all he could say.
"It's a long ways away but it's only two more visits. I don't know what will happen when they take the dampeners off and if Sabrina wants to come both times then I might not get another chance." She explained and he felt his fingers tighten on his lower thighs. Not knowing what she would say. Nothing had caused this level of uncertainty before, apprehension even.
"Would you consider a bonding?" She blurted it out. He had been watching her and it was as if she forced the question out. His mind didn't connect the dots for a second and then he locked eyes with her. He wanted to lean toward her or something, something other than sit across a plank table from her.
"Yes." It was all he could say. He hadn't considered it before this. A bonding instead of a binding. Why. Why would the witch want to do this. He tried to ask her the question with his eyes. Not wanting it to come out wrong. She didn't move for what felt like a long time and then sat back against the straight chair back and looked down.
"We don't have much time. We never do. I have pictures you should see. The short version is that there is a need and a want. I'll explain the need, not here though and it's not deadly. This isn't the only way either so don't think we have to do this." He listened to her soft voice and watched her hands run up and down her thighs slowly as she spoke. Then she looked up and those eyes were intent on him.
"The want is different. I've thought a lot about this and then with Pans sort of having some of the same issues we even talked about it. It's easier to say to her that no piece of paper means she can't be happy. That of course he will love her if she gives him the chance. To fight for happiness. Make it a priority." The witch had courage. She meant it. These weren't demands but things she wanted. He could think about it later though. He had nothing but time for that, now he had to speak.
"To be happy together. Trust each other." He said quietly and she nodded. Maybe relieved he understood. Then she pushed the pictures to him. He knew they didn't have much time but he didn't want their first real conversation about them to be over. His mind was full of Sabrina's words and hers.
The first one was of Sabrina hollering at a laughing Sinclair who was dodging her swinging a book at him. He laughed.
"I recognize that look. And know how good it feels to rile her up like that." He said lowly and she smiled.
"He mentioned that he isn't sure about your habit of tormenting. That's what Sabrina calls it." The was some teasing in her tone, he grinned at that and flipped through a couple more then stopped. Sabrina and Claudia in the Ravenclaw common room was followed by Christmas. Daphne was there and in matching pajamas. Sabrina and Hermione on either side of her, seated in front of everyone else standing behind them and they were smiling at each other. What was Josh thinking?
"Is she alright?" He asked her. Wondering if she would say anything about this to him.
"Daphne?" She asked him and he decided to elaborate a bit.
"Yes. Josh has said some things and not said others. He was less than thrilled after your words though happy with how everything is going." This was tricky. Navigating between them. He wasn't sure about it and didn't want it to be a frequent place he found himself.
"We've only got four minutes so you flip and I'll talk." She said and he smiled his thanks before looking down at the picture of Sinclair and Zabini in wizarding robes with the girls between them. He wondered at the man's involvement, what he thought and why he did it.
"Daphne is fine. She cried over the flowers which was shocking. Don't tell him that maybe. I'm sorry for the way it ended but not for what I said. She deserves acknowledgement and as many of the customs and observances as she can have. The witch is a treasure and I don't think he is treating her like she deserves. His reasons may be valid, I don't know. I do know her though. More and better all the time. She deserves a token and flowers and every thoughtful gesture that can discreetly be carried out on his behalf. I do what I can but that's from me. Not from Josh." She finished quietly and he looked up from the picture of what looked like a piggyback race. His sister and her, Hermione, were laughing and their hair was all over the place while Zabini and Potter raced past the camera.
He looked up at her when he heard the knock. He watched her smile. It wasn't genuine though, he could tell at least that much. Then she put the pictures in the folder and picked up her coat. He watched her, could only watch her and meet her eyes when she got to the door. It was a long look she took then a single nod and she pushed the door open and walked out.