Changing what counts
I was sitting on a chair next to Duo's hospital-bed, so that I could look out of the window and see the sky. It was a grey day, the sunlight was filtered by the many clouds like in one of those cheesy movies. I supposed it could start raining any minute now. I tore my gaze away from the window and looked at Duo, who was sleeping. He still didn't look too good, but it wasn't as bad as it had been when he had first been brought to hospital, well, actually that would have been nearly impossible, since when he brought him in he was dying so...
Then my gaze fell on Wu Fei, who was pacing through the room, which was getting soooooooooooooooooooooo annoying. I could understand why the black-haired pilot did so; the clouds outside, and the tension inside the room were weighing heavily upon me too, made me feel restless, wanting to move but I mean, COME ON!
Eventually I couldn't stand the silence and the tension any longer and spoke up.
-Wufei…
I whispered as softly as I could, hoping I wouldn't disturb Duo…but then again he does sleep like a bear…
The Chinese ex-pilot stopped his pacing and looked at me, an unidentifiable expression on his face. I was too weary to try and use my space-heart to read his emotions, I didn't think I'd be able to unravel the shreds of emotions I'd be feeling if I'd try anyway…
-What is it, Winner?- he asked, after casting a careful glance at the sleeping boy or in my opinion, checked out the sleeping boy, sometimes I feel so sorry for him. I mean I have Trowa and Duousedto have Heero and he would always be left out. He had very strong emotions for the American boy but I guess, out of shyness, he never said anything.
/Or out of fear that Heero would beat him up…/
I sighed and looked at the floor, not really knowing what to say. Then I raised my eyes to meet Wufei's onyx ones. I asked the question that had been on my mind for a while now:
-Should we tell him about Heero, when he wakes up?
/If he wakes up…/
Unfortunately, Duo chose that exact moment to open his eyes, just when Wufei was about to answer me.
-Tell me what?-he asked sleepily.
I glanced at Wufei, shrugging helplessly, as trying to say 'well, now there is no choice but to tell him' but then again, he doesn't have empathy.
Instead of calmly and nicely explaining everything to Duo, Wu Fei turned red, looked away and then let out a scream of agony.
-YUYISENGAGEDTOTHEPEACDCRAFTGIRLNOWGETOVERITANDSTOPCRYING!
At this very moment, I chose to fall over in shock and ponder on the meaning of being friends and what it meant to murder a person. Duo, on the other hand, just stared blankly at Wu Fei for a few seconds before deciphering the brilliantly put sentence and shrugging.
- Get over what?
Now it was Wu Fei's turn to fall over in shock.
-You mean you don't care?
Duo looked at him, slightly puzzled and then laughed.
-Wuffers! You look like you've been worried for the past two days and all you did was pacing! HAHAHAHAHAHA! What I am trying to say-AHAHAHAHAHAH-is that you-HAHAHAHAHAHA-look like HELL! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
I sweat-dropped and pulled myself up, back onto the chair. Maybe Duo had empathy too? But why was he laughing? I sensed tension and another feeling I couldn't identify. From my two years being friends with him, I knew when he faked laughing and smiling and yet, right now, in a situation where the normal Duo would have been crying in hysteria…he was laughing and totally convincing even me. Maybe I was getting old?
- Oh. I'm sorry Quat for neglecting you, YOU LOOK EVEN WORSE! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Wu Fei and I just stared in amazement. Well, actually I was trying to death-glare but mien could never come close to that of Heero… Wu Fei turned around, murmured something about getting Trowa and stumbled away looking incredibly lost. And he had every right to be. Duo just wouldn't stop laughing and so I tried the 'sad eyes' routine. Duo carried on with his new found way of hysteria and then it hit me. He was wearing a mask and what a mask. I must say. He was hiding behind fake emotions to hide the true feeling and so far, it was working.
-Duo…you don't have to wear it now…we, I mean I am your friend, you can be yourself with me…Duo…we'll help you through this, it will be-
- What are you talking about Quat? Wear what? Of course you're my friend, I am myself around you!
/ I may run and I may hide but I never tell a lie/
Damn, he isn't acting then why…? Why is he behaving this way? Is this really…him? All I could do was stare, I didn't know what to say, I was lost.
No, this wasn't Duo. Indeed. Duo doesn't lie. I know he is still good inside, I know he cares about Heero and I know he doesn't think I look like hell.
-Duo…come back.
And with that said I stood up and walked towards the door.
-Quat…?
I turned around, inside I let out a vbreath of relief and put on a slight smile on my lips, it was a mask of his, just another façade.
- When is the wedding, I want to be there when they marry…
How could I ever forgive Heero for doing this to Duo, the fragile boy with a heart softer than mine? How could he?
- SO I CAN LAUGH AT HER FACE FOR HAVING MADE SUCH A MISTAKE! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAhahaeh? Quat? Quat! QATRE!
Darkness.
Changing what counts.
Sometimes people like to hide
And lock themselves away inside
But don't they ever realise
All they do is lose themselves in a bunch of lies
I never hid behind a mask
I always wanted truth
But only now I realise
Reality is what we chose
All those people we don't hear
Walking under a sky of grey
And only now I realise
In their life they never got a say
Some people wear a mask of stone
Or hide behind smiles that never fade
But don't they ever realise
They lose what counts for in their façade
Hi, sorry that I havent updated for so long and I willtry to, sorry, had exams. Well, please review. Nic, I'll try to call.