"Why...?" her sad eyes pieced me, the moonlight left soft trails of tears glowing on her face. She seemed so angelic, so beautiful. The guilt consumed me, a sigh escaped my lips, I owed her an explanation. It was all I could do now...
"She... I... I never really realized it, but... She was... is my best friend." I closed my eyes, not wanting to see her tear stained features. She was to innocent, far to innocent for me to putting her through this.
"...I'm not sure why, I never really wanted it, but it happened... I think it was because... she listened to me." I waited for the angry words, the shouts, but there were none... This was hurting her so much... but I needed to tell her, I had to continue.
"She doesn't expect anything of me. She doesn't want to change me, for better or for worse, she lets me be me... I mean, I can be myself with her. I'm not afraid to say what I think, I don't need to worry about hurting her, because I know she won't hate me..." I swallowed, and looked at the moon, praying I could find the right words.
"She listens to me, she won't interrupt me or tell me to stop. She waits until I'm finished before talking. She tells me her views and her thoughts, but she doesn't force them on me. She helps me make decision, but she never makes them for me, even when she doesn't agree with my solution." a tiny, pained smile found it's way to his lips, the words came so much more easily now.
"I'm not in a cage with her. My actions are my own, I can face the repercussions without regret. And even if I've done something wrong, she'll understand, she'll forgive me. She's made some bad choices too, and she understands how hard things can be, how hard it is to let go. She won't judge me based on a moments actions, or a silly whim. She trusts me. She trusts me with her life, with her hopes and dreams... She gives me everything she can, and expects nothing in return."
"She's never tried to pry into my business, no matter how I may hide things. She knows I have my secrets, and if I want her to know them, I'll tell her. She waits for me. " He slowly turned to the girl, her sobs almost silent, pain written all over he features.
"She's there for me... always. No matter what happens, she's right beside me, fighting with me. It doesn't matter where I go, she'll follow. If I need help, she'll give it, no questions asked." I took the girl into my arms and hugged her, she was breaking, and it was my fault. She didn't push away or yell, she just cried into my chest, letting all of her anguish be felt by the one who caused it. Me.
"I never realized how much I needed her, how much she means to me." The tears began to slow.
"No one has ever done the things she has for me, no one has ever come close..." Her face nuzzled into the fabric, hands gripping it tight. I gave her a squeeze, a pathetic attempt to make her feel better.
"I'm so sorry... I never meant for it to happen, I never wanted it too... But I'm sorry... Sorry for not being able to see it until it was to late." Her watery brown eyes looked into mine, and in that moment, I knew I truly I hated myself.
"I'm sorry Kagome, but I love her..." I let the girl slowly drop to the forest floor, her body in an unnatural position, tucked in the grass. I couldn't bring myself to look at her anymore, I turned, and faced the black sky.
"I love her Kagome... I love Sango."