DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANY NARUTO CHARACTERS. I JUST OWN THE PLOT.
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Naruto Classics
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The Woodcutter
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Shikamaru woke one bright morning to the sound of his brother's waking up. He quickly got dressed and ran downstairs to eat breakfast. There he found his siblings already getting ready to go out and do their woodcutting duties. Shikamaru had 5 brothers and 2 sisters, making a total of 7 siblings, plus him, would equal eight. "What a troublesome family." He thought as he grabbed a lemon doughnut and ran off to the woodcutting site. Tenten was already there, hacking down the trees like a person from Dr. Sue's books. Shikamaru's brother Neji was there too, using his MAD fighting skillz to chop trees down 10 at a time. You could see that he was aiming the trees so they fell near his cousin Hinata's work area and were nearly crushing her. As each tree fell, you could almost hear Neji whisper a chant that went something like this "The Branch house member crushed the Main house member. The Branch house member crushed the Main house member. The Branch house member crushed the Main house member. The branch house member crushed the main house……" What was HIS problem? Anyway, Shikamaru set to the tedious troublesome work of chopping wood.
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"Okay people, break time!" yelled Sasuke as the siblings split up. Except Lee, who was shouting madly.
"I WILL NOT STOP! I MUST GO ON AND BE YOUTHFUL!" he cried, smashing a nearby tree into a trillion pieces with his MAD taijutsu skills.
"GOOD WORK LEE! THAT'S WHAT I LIKE TO HEAR!" Gai appeared out of nowhere and jumped on Lee.
"GAI!"
"LEE!"
"GAI!"
"LEE!"
"GAI!"
With that the two skipped off to have lunch. Somewhere near the sunset.
"I wish I could have lunch like that." Said Naruto. He missed him ramen eating days.
"Me too." Agreed all those that wished to have lunch near the sunset. And it was only one person….. SHINO! Chouji? Nah, he isn't that weird. He isn't even Shikamaru's brother. He was his best friend.
"Let's go to McDonalds." Suggested Kiba.
"ALRIGHT!" everyone jumped up and punched the air. HARD. In fact, they punched the air so hard that a passing bird got shot. HARD. But nobody paid attention and just ran off. Well, almost everybody.
Shikamaru turned around to see Chouji stare at the bird for along, LONG time.
"Poor birdie.' Said Chouji sadly as he picked it up and dragged it to Macdonalds.
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"I WANT PEPPERONI PIZZA!" yelled Kiba. The team was sitting at the counter at Macdonalds.
"Me too!" cried Naruto.
Everyone was silent for a long, LONG time.
"You do know that McDonalds doesn't sell pepperoni pizza right?" asked Tenten nervously.
"OF COURSE NOT!" the two answered.
Everybody was all like : ………
And Kiba and Naruto were all like???
Shino was all like: I WANT TO EAT LUNCH AT THE SUNSET.
While Tenten was all like: Grrrrr
And Kiba and Naruto were all like: gulp.
Shikamaru was all like: This is troublesome.
Chouji was all like: Poor, poor bird. It's - Hey! Is that PEPPERONI PIZZA?
So Neji was all like: twitch twitch must. stab. Hinata. twitch
While Hinata be all like: Save me! HELP!
Sasuke was all like: must. kill. Itachi.
And somewhere in his hidden lair of pink cotton candy and stuff Itachi was all like: I feel shivers up my spine Save me! HELP!…… then he sneezed.
Somewhere in his hidden lair of pink stuff and cotton candy (It's different from Itachi's because the "stuff" is first, then the cotton candy, so he's not copying Itachi.) Kisame heard Itachi sneezing. Somebody must be spreading a rumor about Itachi-san. I must go and kill them immediately. Thought Kisame, and he ran off.
Back at McDonalds, the siblings were arguing about whether there was pepperoni pizza available for lunch. They argued for a long, LONG, LONG time, making them miss lunch.
Halfway through the long, LONG, LONG argument Shikamaru decided it was all too troublesome for him and he started to slip away to stare at the clouds. Then he decided that staring at clouds were too troublesome too so he went to sleep.
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Pretty soon Shikamaru woke up. When he did he realized he slept overtime, and it was already the next day (he could tell the time with his super watch that came with the happy meal for MacDonalds.) Ah this is troublesome. He thought. Shikamaru sat up and saw a conveniently placed axe. He picked it up and swung up and chopped off the top of a conveniently placed tree. The conveniently placed tree broke in half onto a conveniently placed truck, which drove away. Ahh! Why is everything so "conveniently placed"! Thought Shikamaru. It was starting to freak him out. Really. He turned around and saw a conveniently placed golden goose. The HORROR! Shikamaru freaked out. He ran screaming like a psycho and accidentally bumped into Kisame.
"YOU.' The shark shouted.
Shikamaru didn't answer, just continued to be freaked out and ran away. Good thing too, because Kisame was about to inflict large punishment on him. As he was getting angry that he let Shikamaru get away, Kisame met up with Kankuro. So he decided to take his anger out on him instead. The conversation went like this:
"YOU!"
"AHHHHHH! It's Kisame!"
"YOU WERE SPREADING RUMORS ABOUT ITACHI, WEREN'T YOU?"
"Rumors? I don't' know what you're talking abou-"
"DON'T LIE! I KNOW YOU DID IT, AND NOW YOU SHALL PAY."
The shark raised his GIGANTIC sword, and was about to kill Kankuro, who was about to die, if it hadn't been for a few good things.
The first good thing was a conveniently placed rock made Kisame trip and fall behind Hinata. Another good thing was that Neji was doing his mad tree chopping skillz, trying to hit Hinata. The other good thing was that the tree didn't hit Hinata but hit Kisame instead. And so it was a good thing Kisame was squished by Neji's falling trees that were aimed at Hinata so he couldn't kill Kankuro. Ouch. That was a long run on sentence.
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Somewhere far, far, away from the chaos there sat a princess. Actually, there were two princesses. One was princess Ino, who had long blonde hair and was admired all around the kingdom. The other princess was pink haired, and had green eyes that were so vivid and made even the most beautiful beauty queens were jealous. At a distance, the rulers were differed in every way, but the only thing that made them connected was that they never laughed. Not even a smile. The Queen was unhappy about this, so she made it that whoever made them laugh would get a reward. ANY reward.
One day the two princesses sat outside on a conveniently placed patio, watching the conveniently placed kingdom from below when all of the sudden the queerest thing happened.
First there was a boy with a dog who ran by, who was being followed by a blonde boy with whiskers, who was being followed by an angry girl with a wacky hairstyle. The girl seemed to be yelling: "THERE ISN'T ANY PEPPERONI PIZZA SERVED AT MACDONALDS!" and the reply she got was "OF COURSE THERE IS!" thereafter which followed more chasing.
In the next scene was chasing a girl with white eyes who was screaming "DON'T KILL ME!" who was being chased by a boy with similar eyes that held a MEGAHUGE sword in his hands and a really, REALLY large maniacal grin spread across his face. Like a horror movie clown. This gave the two watchers the shivers. Especially since they noticed the sword was Kisame's.
The third scene consisted of a crazed maniac who was screaming "WHY IS EVERYTHING SO CONVEINIENTLY PLACED! AHHHHHHHHHH!" who was followed by a person dragging a dead bird, which made a PLOP sound when it hit the ground.
The final scene was just one person who was all like: ……………..
At this point the girls burst out laughing. The conveniently placed Queen saw this and she tracked the mob down, explaining about the girls and that they get to choose a reward. ANY reward.
The group thought very hard, each one having their own wishes, but before anybody could say anything, Kiba shouted: "WE WANT PEPPERONI PIZZA TO BE SERVED AT MACDONALDS!"
"So it shall be." Said the Queen. She snapped her finger and pointed her toes and said "I want to go home." Then the mob were transported to MacDonalds and everybody had a healthy piece of perpperoni pizza.
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Author's Note: 'Kay, the second chapter is out! It kindsa sucked, but my inspiration juices are drying out! Just for your information, here's who's who.
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Shikamaru's Brothers:
Shino, Neji, Sasuke, Kiba (and techinically, Itachi).
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Shikamaru's Sisters:
Tenten, Hinata
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Friends/ Co-workers
Naruto (friend of Kiba.), Chouji (Shikamaru's friend.), and Lee (co-worker.)
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Royalty
Ino, Sakura, Hokage: Tsunade (the Queen.)
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AND BIG THANKS TO THESE PEOPLE FOR REVIEWING.
(- indicates my response.)
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Uchiha-not-'fan'-but-'Inside Blade'-Arashi:
Heheh... it was very good. Except Naruto broke "another window" when Neji had already complained that Kakashi broke his only window.
Aw... I was going to do "Three Little Pigs". Um... could you do... "Sleeping Beauty" or something? Or um... Disney... hm... "Cinderella". "Princess and the Pea". "The Glass Hill".
- YAY! A review! Okay, as you can see, I did a rewritten "The Golden Goose." instead of the three little pigs. Thanks for reviewing!
2stupid:
XD THAT WAS AWESOME!
- First seen review! Or maybe it was the other one. I don't know. ANYWAY, THANKS FOR REVIEWING!
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Pah! That's all! I want to try and have at least 5 reviews before I issue the next chapter.