-Ah-Un talking telepathically to Kirara-

!- Kirara talking telepathically to Ah-Un -! (though it used to be that pretty squiggle they put over Spanish words- but it won't appear in BLEEPing Fanfiction!)

Yes, I know, there is a bit of an Ah-Un/Kirara here… hey, what a brilliant idea for a fanfiction!

Hai - yes

Ja Ne! - See ya!

Sake- a Japanese alcohol drink

Tayija (sp?)- Demon exterminator (ex. Sango)

Tessaiga - How I spell 'Tetsusaiga' because that's how it's pronounced in JAPANESE and written in the subtitles. It's like writing 'Kikyo' instead of 'Kikyou.' So don't you DARE tell me off for typos! Unless it's other ones, of course, like saying "teh" instead of "the."

This chapter is general silliness of everybody going on vacation. Enjoy!

(Notice the poem from the second InuYasha movie is used as paragraph breaks.)

Review responses at bottom.

A Day In The Life Of Naraku

5

In Which Everybody Goes On Vacation, and Kirara and Ah-Un Hang Out

Naraku was bored. As was stated in chapter one, he had thought up a plan to kill InuYasha- but after the mess in chapter four, he was exhausted.

"Y'know what I need?" he said Kanna one day, "A vacation. Somewhere really sunny. People always think I like damp and gloomy places, and I keep the act up to sound more evil- but I like a tan as much as anybody. Of course-" he looked at Kanna, "-you realize if you tell anybody, I'll kill you."

"Yes, Naraku." Kanna said.

"Good girl. Now, where could I go?" he pondered. "After all, killing InuYasha can wait- and Kagura can hold up the fort. Maybe Tahiti… yeah, somewhere in the Caribbean." He looked at Kanna.

"I'm glad we had this talk. Tell Kagura when she comes back I'll be gone for a month, and that she has to make sure Kohaku doesn't get loose and stuff." He left to pack.

Kanna yawned.

ToMeetNevermore;TearsOfSorrowOverflowdeepWithinMyHeart

Kagura came home late that night. Kanna was waiting for her.

"Where's Naraku?" questioned Kagura.

"He's gone away, he'll be back in a month." She said in her usual quiet monotone.

"A month, you say?" she grinned. "Do you know what this means, Kanna?"

Kanna shook her head.

Kagura rubbed her hands together. "It means…PARTY TIME!"

WhatGoodThisPotionOfLife?AllIsButDustInTheWind

Kirara was daydreaming about fish when she heard Ah-Un calling her.

Now, see, animal demons with intelligence like Ah-Un (Sesshomaru's noble steed) and Kirara have very cool powers. Ah-Un and Kirara had met once (I'm sure at least in ONE episode), and since then had become good friends.

Being a bit more sensible than they're owners, they realized the stupidity of how far InuYasha and Sesshomaru had carried their sibling rivalry, and soon found they had similar interests (fish, nature, fire-breathing, etc.) In fact, they often met in secret when no one was looking.

This was hard on Ah-Un, since Sesshomaru kind of never slept, but he sometimes he managed to slip away without Fluffy noticing (or so he thought ).

There were a few other things they could do, like just KNOWING some things. I mean, they ARE extremely old. Like Dumbledore, sort of.

Luckily, everybody's attention was drawn to InuYasha being sat by Kagome for tripping over her backpack and crushing her homework, so Kirara managed to slip away.

Ah-Un was by the Green Glass Pool (that's what Kirara called it).

- Have you noticed it? - Ah-Un asked telepathically.

!-Noticed what?-! Kirara asked back.

- Naraku's gone! -

!- Is he now? I was so preoccupied; InuYasha is being 'sat' by Kagome, and it's quite funny -!

- What I'm wondering is: where did he go? He's not dead - just gone! -

!- I think he's gone on vacation -! Kirara said, after pausing a second.

- Hmm. Interesting. I wonder where? -

!- Tahiti is nice this time of year. -!

- Yeah, the Caribbean. -

Oh arrow of mine/With power pure and immense to slay the dragon

Kanna looked up at the sign in distaste (although Kagura couldn't tell, seeing as how Kanna's expression never changed).

"'Dirty Dick's Den?' Are you sure this is a good bar?" she asked softly.

"Of course. Don't be such a snob, Kanna, we're here to celebrate!"

They walked in.

After her outburst at the castle, Kagura had considered that this might be a trap of Naraku's.

However, She had already blown her bubble and could not bear to pop it. So, she decided to get a few drinks at the bar- something she could never do because Naraku forbade it (it would have been too much fun).

"What'll you be having?" asked the bartender. He spat into a glass, then wiped it with a filthy rag that looked like it had never been washed.

"Sake." Kagura said. "What about you, Kanna?"

Kanna shook her head. "No thanks."

Kagura looked at Kanna in surprise. She must really not like the place, to have actually shaken her head -!

Or maybe the cold act is wearing off now that Naraku's gone! She thought.

This was a good guess, but a wrong one nonetheless. You see, Kanna had no soul. That's why she had a soul - sucking mirror.

The same reason a vampire drinks blood to make up for the fact he has none, Kanna sucked souls to keep her alive. Even Naraku didn't know.

That's why she always keeps her mirror with her, clutched in her hands. A body can't live without soul essence, and she steals the essence from the souls she traps in her mirror.

But enough with the scientific InuYasha facts- I just wanted to put my ideas somewhere before I forgot them.

Well, one more: Fluffy's fluffy thing is NOT a tail. It's not connected; I've seen it in pictures, and on my key chain.

And besides, who the hell wears theirs tail over their shoulder? And yeah, maybe it turns into his tail when he transforms, but his clothing turns into fur too, and does that make it his skin?

Ahem. Now that we've cleared THAT up.

DoYourGoodDeedFastAndSwift/GraspTheCrystalInItsNeck.

Naraku was very pleased. He was lying in a sunbeam at a spa, getting a massage by a very pretty masseuse. Masseusess. Whatever.

This was almost as good as killing InuYasha! Almost.

He frowned, then relaxed. He'd worry about that later.

Right now, I need to plot how to get this girl's number.

IVenturedToSeeIfWhatIHeardWasTrue/ButThisJeweledSprig

- Ok, would you rather have a lifetime's supply of fish, or have the ability to become invisible? - Ah-Un asked.

!- Hmm… invisible. Would you rather… See Sesshomaru hug InuYasha, or glow in the dark? -! Kirara replied.

- Definitely Lord Sesshomaru hugging InuYasha! -

Kirara and Ah-Un giggled telepathically at the idea for a minute.

- Hey Kirara? -

!- Yes, Ah-Un? -!

- Wouldn't it be nice if WE could go on vacation? I mean, we deserve it, for all the work we've done. -

!- But we can't. -!

- Why not? As long as Naraku's on vacation, they won't need us as much - that would give us a whole month to party! -

!- It's tempting… -!

- Please? We could go to the Caribbean! Sun, waves, sand… -

!- Waves? -!

- Ok, skip the waves- just sun. Imagine the sunbeams we could snooze in! -

!- Well… I guess it would be okay… but as soon as Naraku gets back, so do we! -!

- All right! Let's go! -

WithLeavesSoReal'TwasNothing/MoreThanAnEmptyPromise

Kagura sighed with contentment. Here she was, sipping lemonade, watching the sunset framed by the mountains. The sky was a mess of pink and red.

Kanna was back at the castle, watching the grass grow. Well, there WAS no grass; it had all died from the miasma. So after looking around futilely for grass, she watched the paint of the side of the castle dry.

Kagura was so at peace, she fell asleep and had a wonderful dream about drowning Naraku.

The white-hot flames of my love for you/Cannot burn this cloth of fur

Naraku was eating dinner. Across was him was the masseuse- Marie. The sun was setting in the west.

Naraku was plotting, as always, this time about what to do with her.

Murder, of course, was the first thing that came to mind, until he realized he was on vacation. Surely there was something else he could do?

Of course, seeing as how my mother could read this, I won't elaborate. I mean, as Michel Gerber once said, who wants to have THAT conversation? ;-)

My raiment sleeves dried of tears/Now on this day I don.

Meanwhile, Kirara and Ah-Un were watching the sunset over the ocean.

!- Wow. It's so pretty; especially over this ocean- it's so BLUE! -!

- Yeah. -

Ah-Un moved a bit closer to Kirara.

Could you have but known/That it would burn so swiftly this raiment of fur,

By this time Sesshomaru and Sango noticed that their steeds were seriously missing.

Sango was worried. Sesshomaru wondered wistfully if it was sunny where Ah-Un had gone.

He could do with a vacation. Without Ah-Un, Rin was very bored, thus more annoying to Sesshomaru and crueler to Jaken.

She kept talking incessantly about where Ah-Un might have gone, while shoving Jaken aside whenever he got in her way while they were walking.

Sesshomaru, of course, ignored her. He blocked out her voice and stared into the sunset, thinking.

Maybe I'll go on vacation too. Tahiti's nice this time of year…

You would not then have sat with such little show of concern.

Kagura stared up at the starry sky for a long time.

She was so bored with Japan. How she would love a change in scenery!

"If Naraku's really not coming back for a month- I could really travel!" she said aloud. "Somewhere sunny. Maybe somewhere in the Caribbean…?"

Time has passed swiftly/As I have waited to see the shell you promised

Sango was VERY worried by nightfall. Where was Kirara?

"I have to go after her. Miroku, you wait for Kagome to come back from her world and for InuYasha's spine to heal." She had explained as she packed her small sack. "I think I can follow her trail- although it'll be hard without the means to fly."

Now she was running through the forest, following her trail. A single tear fell from her eye as she looked up at the stars.

"Oh Kirara, I hope you're alright!"

They say that I wait in vain/Could this be so?

Kirara was sipping a pina colada, looking up at the stars, with Ah-Un at her side, eating some steak.

!- This was a great idea Ah-Un! -!

- (Telepathic grin) -

I hoped to find the gleam of the fallen dew/But nothing can I see

The next morning, Rin and Jaken awoke to find Sesshomaru gone, except for a note he had stuck to a tree:

GONE ON VACATION. JAKEN, TAKE CARE OF RIN OR I'LL KILL YOU.

- LORD SESSHOMARU

Rin blinked. Jaken gaped.

Why did you go yonder /To Mount Ogura?

Naraku was having breakfast at Simple Suzy's Salon, when he saw her.

NO WAY.

She couldn't be here, not now! That stupid woman- she must've though he brought Kohaku with him. But how could Sango find him when even Kagura didn't know where he was?

She walked into the restaurant, saw him, and gasped.

"NARAKU?"

RandomPageBreakCuzThePoem'sFinished

Kirara was lying happily in the sun with Ah-Un on the beach. Suddenly, she sat up.

!- Uh-oh. Ah-Un, look who's here. -!

Ah-Un looked up.

- Lord Sesshomaru! -

"Well well well, long time no see, Ah-Un."

See No Evil, Hear No Evil - Well, 2 Outta 3 Ain't Bad!

Kagura looked over the edge of her feather at the blue Caribbean ocean, and the beach beyond.

"Sun surf and sand, here I come!"

TheWheelIsTurningButTheHamsterIsDead (ThanksToTheFanFictionAuthorWhoWroteThis!)

"Sango? The demon exterminator?" asked Naraku in amazement.

"No, it's Buddha. Yes, it's Sango. What are you doing here? And why are you wearing a lei?" she asked.

Naraku blushed, and took it off. "It's a-a disguise!"

"Right."

"Naraku? And the tayija from InuYasha's gang?" asked a surprised voice behind them.

Sango turned around.

"SESSHOMARU?" asked both Sango and Naraku in unison.

Needless to say, Sesshomaru was too cool for a lei, although he HAD taken off his fluffy thing, on account of the heat. It made him look strangely vulnerable.

- Don't forget me -

Of course, only Kirara heard him.

"Kirara!" shouted Sango. She glared at Fluffy. "What did you do to her?"

"Nothing- she and Ah-Un came here on their own." He patted Ah-Un on the head affectionately.

"Yeah right. Why would they come here together?" snorted Naraku.

"Why are YOU here?" asked Sesshomaru.

Naraku blushed.

90PercentOfThePeopleWhoReadTheyCan'tLickTheirElbowTryAnyway

Kagura looked around at the busy market place.

"Excuse me, where is a good place to eat?" she asked a man in a huge hat.

He pointed down the road.

"Simple Suzy's Salon."

90PercentOfThePeopleWhoReadTheyCan'tLickTheirElbowTryAnyway

The air was so thick with confusion and hatred in Simple Suzy's Salon; you could slice through it with a knife. Then Kagura walked in.

"Sesshomaru?" she asked in disbelief. He eyes widened. "Sango?"

Her eyes widened even more. "NARAKU?"

!- Don't forget us -! Kirara said, although to everyone else it came out as "growl grr."

"Well, I'm going to have breakfast somewhere else. Come, Ah-Un." Sesshomaru said, and started to walk out.

- Lord Sesshomaru -

Sesshomaru looked at Ah-Un.

Ah-Un looked over at Kirara longingly.

- Please? -

Sesshomaru rolled his eyes.

"I'll meet you later."

- Thank you, Lord Sesshomaru. -

"Kagura, what are you doing here?" asked Naraku.

"What are YOU doing here?" she retorted.

"NONE OF YOUR BUISNESS! Now, go home and leave me in peace. I'm too busy to deal with you or the tayija now."

"I better go too, now that I know Kirara's ok. Kirara, come home soon."

!- Sure thing. -!

Sango left.

"Please can I stay? Oh pretty please?" asked Kagura.

"Absolutely not! Besides, I'm coming home. We need to kill InuYasha, remember."

Great- my vacation is ruined. At least it was fun while it lasted. Still, he frowned, the food here sucks!

He and Kagura left.

-We better go too - our masters will need us, if Naraku really does have a plan. -

!- Yes. Thanks, Ah-Un. -!

And they left too.

"Hey!" shouted Simple Suzy. "You have to pay for that meal, y'know!"

End Of Silly Chapter Five

REVIEW!

WAIT, THERE'S MORE!

Review answers and a sad episode quote!

Hasso and Cleo - Thanks! But what "identity crisis?" Oh, and the last chapter wasn't a cliffhanger, it was a joke. I will try to think up a body-switching chapter- but I have to post this bit 'o' silliness first. :-)

Kumguat21

Moondragon13

Gwen Aveire

krazifreak106

I-luv-the-cat-sohma52

---

Thank you all so much!

All you people who read this story/chapter but didn't review - GET LOST! (No, I'm kidding, my response is - REVIEW!)

My sad quote:

Episode 50: Naraku/Kohaku Scene

Naraku: Kohaku - remember that I spared your life; I also removed your terrible memories for you. And yet you STILL failed to kill Kagome. Why's that, Kohaku?

Kohaku: (Silence)

Naraku: Do you wish to become human again? Then do you want your memories returned? ALL of your memories? (touches Kohaku)

Kohaku: (starts) No! NO! (sobs)

Naraku: Huh. Fair enough. (touches Kohaku, who goes silent again) I'll let you live- for now. Forget it all.

Kohaku: (does a sort of slump-bow) Yes. (becomes blank again, but still pictures Sango) Still, I can't erase that woman's face from my mind.

:'(