Star Wars Fan Fiction

Force Wanderer

By Kraven Ergeist

Chapter Two

Serge had always been a good student at the academy. He was at the top of his class, and even outshone most disciples in the higher levels. The only Jedi's to have surpassed him were the Headmaster's kin – Ben Skywalker, and Jaicen, Jaina and Anakin Solo. Apart from those with the Skywalker lineage, however, Serge excelled in every field – force mastery, saber arts, meditation disciplines, diplomacy, and many others.

This, however, was not enough for the young disciple.

At the beginning of his last year at the academy, on the eve of his 18th year, Serge met a new student who had transferred into the Academy as a first year. Her name was Judas Filaan, a stunning young woman of fiery blonde hair and gorgeous features. Serge took to her immediately, forgetting all discipline concerning controlling one's feelings and emotions. He was absolutely stricken with her, and spent all his free hours by her side, being as friendly and affectionate as he could.

At first, Judas was cold and treated him with disdain. Still, Serge pursued her. And still, Judas ignored him. Until one day, he took the blame for her, after she was involved in an accident that left an entire wing of the ruins that made up the Academy grounds in shambles, a misdemeanor that was grounds for a semester's suspension. Being an honors student and an upper classman, Serge got off with a month, but Judas took the act to heart. Afterwards, she and Serge became more involved. They would study together, go on secret outings, and eventually became close to the point where it would become a problem if any of the teacher's found out.

Which, of course, they eventually did. What Serge didn't know, however, was that Judas was a Sith.

"I cannot abide this, Serge," Headmaster Skywalker told him, after finding the two of them hidden together in a vacant classroom. Several other Jedi were gathered at the doorway to gasp in shock at the proceedings. "Any love apart from altruism is forbidden at the Academy and is highly frowned upon in the Jedi order," Luke said, sharply. "The only reason it is permitted at all is because the Jedi are still too few, and the bloodline of those strong with The Force is too crucial to disallow procreation. Even so, you are still a youngling. Under normal circumstances, I would let you off with a stern warning. However…"

Luke drew his lightsaber and pointed it at Judas' face. "The young woman you are holding in your arms is a Sith spy!"

Serge stared first at his uncle's angry face, and then at Judas's sullen one.

"Jude…?" Serge asked. "He's lying, isn't he?"

Judas drooped her head sullenly. "I wanted to tell you, Serge…but I thought that you would…hate me if you knew."

"Jude…" The young Jedi sobbed. "So that 'accident' before was...?"

"You have to believe me!" The Sith girl said, clutching him by the shoulders. "After meeting you, everything changed! The…the plan was to breach the Academy and allow a Sith strike team to penetrate the walls of the Academy. But after meeting you…there was no way I could have gone through with it. Not if it meant betraying the man I love."

She released the boy and looked at Master Skywalker. "What I'm trying to say is that I am an outcast to the Sith order now! Please don't throw me back to them! They'll kill me the first chance they get!"

Master Skywalker frowned. "I'm afraid this breach cannot be remedied with simple banishment."

Serge gasped, falling to his knees. "That…you can't do that!"

The Headmaster pursed his lips. "I'm afraid that I have no choice. A Sith in the Jedi Academy is unacceptable. She will face execution."

Serge drew his blue lightsaber. "You will die before you lay a finger on her!"

Every on looking Jedi placed a worried hand on their weapons, but the Headmaster waved them back.

"Serge," Luke said, drawing his emerald green blade. "Please don't do this."

Serge screamed and let loose a flurry of attacks, striking at the Headmaster with all the anguish he felt. Luke parried his student's attacks with ease, knocking back Serge's saber with his emerald green blade.

"Please!" Luke exclaimed. "Don't!"

Serge kept screaming again and again, until he lost focus on his attacks and simply attacked with all the rage in his heart.

Luke finally retaliated, knocking the lightsaber from his hand.

"Restrain him!" he commanded to the observing Jedi, who swiftly obeyed. Luke stepped forward to the young woman in front of him, who fell to her knees. "I'll make you an offer. My wife was once a Sith. She rescinded the Dark Side for my sake. I ask you to do the same for my student's sake. Forgo the Dark Side, Judas, and uphold the light. Do this, and you shall be spared Jedi justice."

Judas stared back at the Jedi, a look of unforgiving ridicule in her eyes. "You don't get it, do you, Skywalker!? You married a former Sith and you still don't get it! The day your wife rescinded the Dark Side was the day she also rescinded every ounce of passion she ever felt for you! The Dark Side is passion! Without it, we cannot feel love, joy, desire, ecstasy, anything that comes from the bond between one and another! You're asking me not only to forgo my passion for Serge, but to forgo what it is that makes me who I am!"

Luke frowned, holding his lightsaber over her. "I ask you one last time: relinquish the Dark Side." Between clenched teeth, he voiced. "…Please. I don't want to leave my student broken hearted. Please!"

Judas glared back. "You have my answer, Skywalker. Give me your Jedi justice!"

Serge flailed in the grasp of his captors. "Master Skywalker! No!"

Luke raised his lightsaber, a look of sorrow on his face. "Then you leave me no choice."

With one swift motion, he undid her life.

xxxxx

"I was never the same after that," Serge said to Kim. "I took up her lightsaber and fled the Academy. I've been living alone since then, grief stricken. At one point, I almost turned to the Dark Side. But I held back from seeking vengeance, mostly because I was too afraid. So, instead, I hid myself and buried my grief…in this stuff," he indicated the bottle before him. "Now, I am merely lost, not truly light or dark. I employ powers from either side, using both, trusting neither. And to this day I remain…" Serge sighed, taking a deep breath. "When you allow yourself to love, you begin to wonder why you ever became a Jedi. Its principles forbid anything to exist between individuals. If a Jedi feels love, it must be equally dispersed among all. You have to let go of what it is that makes us warm blooded creatures.

"And the Sith are no better. Rather than suppressing the passion that drives us, they embrace it, letting it consume every bit of free will they have. Passion includes love, yes, but it also includes greed, anger, lust for power…these are not things I have need for. I just want to wither away. I may be free of the Academy, free of the Sith…free to love. But at the end of it all, there is no one left for me to love. They have each chosen their sides…"

Serge waved his hand. "Sorry, I'm rambling. So, if I have disillusioned any notions of being a Sith…"

Kim frowned, staring hard at the young Jedi. His hair was long and ragged, his face unclean and unshaven, and his garb would suggest that he had been living a street life for years.

As much as Kim hated to admit it, his story was valid. Though she sensed traces of the Dark Side in him, she also sensed traces of the light as well.

What gave her pause was her mission. Was she to return home to the Jedi outpost on Corellia and report her failure? Would they see the situation as she did? Or was she to lie, and say she and killed her target? No, the council was very good at detecting lies, even from other Jedi. Besides, suppose Serge were to appear again somewhere?

Even if she did leave him as is, who was to say he wouldn't turn to the Dark Side after the fact?

No, she decided. Kim stood from her seat across from the young Jedi. "My orders were clear: I am either to bring the Sith Serge Verdammt to the Jedi Academy, or failing that, to eliminate him."

Serge sighed deeply before standing. "I suppose that leaves us at an impasse. Know this: I shall never return to the Jedi Academy. You shall have to kill me."

Kim inhaled. "Step outside, then. No need to involve all these people."

Serge shrugged, heading towards the exit. "As you would have it."

xxxxx

The two Jedi faced off on the rooftops of the slums, secluded but for the buzz of traffic overhead, notorious for running at all hours.

Kim had discarded her Jedi robes in favor of her freer, more mobile leather tunic and pants, allowing for easier movement amidst combat. Serge shed his outer cloak as well, wrapped in freer but no less dirty leathers.

"Have I established that this is not a fight I wish to partake in?" Serge voiced sardonically.

"You've made your point clear," Kim responded. "Though I'm sure that you're aware of how little weight it bears on my decision."

"Indeed," Serge sighed. "Then I suppose there's no choice..."

Tentively, he unholstered Judas's lightsaber, a beautifully sculpted instrument of black and silver. He bore it horizontally before his face, bowing it in like a sword of honor. He then gripped the hilt firmly, feeling its cold energy grow to life.

Respect everyone and everything, his master's words repeated themselves in his head. Even when they don't deserve it, give them your respect. You may find they may give it in return.

Kim responded to his actions by unholstering her own lightsaber, and holding it out to the side, her thumb hovering over the activation switch.

For a moment, the two stood, their force senses flexing and resounding, getting a feel for their environment. In moments, both were acutely aware of every cubic inch of space in a radius of about half a kilometer. They stood motionless, sizing up one another, each waiting for the other to make the first move.

In a single action, Kim flipped the switch on her lightsaber, unleashing a sapphire blade of energy, and made a dash towards her opponent.

Serge reacted immediately, allowing his own, scarlet blade to emerge from the hilt of his saber, meeting the oncoming attack with a parry.

The fight was on, with Kim hammering Serge with a flurry of ferocious attacks, each swing fast and deadly. Serge fended her off, backing his way across the rooftop as continued to steer her saber away just enough to miss him.

Not ten moves later, Serge felt the space behind him decrease to nothing. Dodging what would have been a move that had removed his legs, he launched himself upwards, landing on the fire escape of the adjacent wall of a taller neighboring residence.

Kim perused unhesitatingly, keeping the red saber wielding Jedi on his toes. Up the rusty stairs she pressed, slicing through railings like a hot knife through butter, leaving hot yellow stickers where they passed. Up the winding staircase the two climbed, Kim swiping at Serge's ankles any chance she got. Serge just barely managed to fend her off one handed, his left devoted to the railing, keeping his rate of climb at a maximum.

When he reached the top, Serge leapt away from the fire escape, landing at the center of yet another rooftop, earning him a few precious moments to recollect himself.

Kim calmly stepped over to him, and with a mighty swing, locked blades with the young Jedi.

Serge held off her attack, both of their sabers crackling dangerously close to his face. Pressed for ideas, he spoke.

"By the way," he grunted, "You never told me your name."

Kim threw him back, her saber still raised defensively. "What do you care?"

Serge shrugged, his saber held loosely before him. "I don't know. You know my name, it's only fair that we're even."

Kim hesitated for a moment before smirking. "I'm Kim Jagosa. Remember it. It'll be the last name you hear."

Serge grinned. "Don't be too sure…"

Serge lifted his left hand and spat a shower of lighting that Kim just barely managed to catch amidst the energy of her blade. She changed her stance to better absorb the fierce energy, and missed seeing Serge's advance, as he let go of his force lightning and released a flying kick that knocked Kim's lightsaber from her grasp. Before she could move, his crimson blade was inches from her throat.

Kim gasped, adrenaline and endorphins suddenly causing her to drop to one knee. She panted, refusing to meet his gaze. "…Kill me quickly."

Serge didn't respond. He didn't move. Kim was almost positive that he didn't breath.

"There's just no point."

Kim finally raised her eyes up towards Serge.

His blade was lowered.

"I've never appreciated mercy," Kim spat.

"There just isn't a point," Serge sighed, turning away. "I kill you, another Jedi comes, and I kill and kill until one of them bests me. Fruitless and destructive to both sides with no hope of either truly being successful in the end."

Kim still hadn't moved. "Then why don't you turn yourself in?"

Serge frowned and shook his head. "…No. You may consider me to be a Sith, but I have my honor. I will never set foot amongst the Jedi at large so long as I live." Serge turned to face her. "I've walked a razor's edge since I left the Academy. Sometimes, I think that the only reason I haven't turned is that I've never taken a life. Somehow, that knowledge is enough to convince me that there's still a chance. I don't know."

Kim didn't respond.

"Return to where you came from and have them send another Jedi," Serge said, turning his back. "Maybe I'll get lucky and be able to reason with them as well."

Serge took a step. And another.

And then Kim drew her lightsaber to her, snatching it out of the air and drew it, pointed at the back of Serge's head.

He froze.

"Your solution doesn't help me, Serge," Kim glared. "I've never reported a single failure in my life. You're not about to be my first."

Serge turned around and smiled. "Well…then kill me."

Kim furrowed her brow. "You can't be serious!"

Serge held his arms out wide. "It's the best solution. I won't have to kill a single Jedi, nor will I have to set foot on Jedi soil, and you can report back successful. It satisfies both our ends."

Kim didn't move. Mentally debating with herself, she stood motionless, running over the possibilities and implications in her head a thousand times.

"My orders were clear: I am either to bring the Sith Serge Verdammt to the Jedi Academy, or failing that, to eliminate him."

Kim retracted her lightsaber. Her face softened.

"I see no Sith here," she said, holstering her saber. "You are, however, my only lead. I will continue to track you until I have verified that the Sith Serge Verdammt never arises."

Serge let out a chortle. "Are you serious? You would devote your life to ensuring that I never threaten your order?"

Kim nodded. "I am a Jedi, Serge, and a patient one. The real question is, are you so certain that you will never, even for a moment, turn to the Dark Side? Because the instant you do…I'll be there. I'll be there to fulfill my duty."

Serge could only huff. "Duty. Is that what the Jedi are calling it now? It used to be called 'destiny' back in the Dark Times. Do you know why people invent these things called 'duty' and 'destiny?' So that those who cannot trust their instincts have a reason to follow some coda that they only think they believe in. Duty…destiny…how convenient that these terms outline anything a higher power wishes you to believe in."

Kim exhaled. "Spare me your rationale. This meeting is over."

Serge raised an eyebrow. "Oh…so this was a 'meeting' now?"

Kim turned her back. "For both our sakes…let it be our last."

Serge crossed his arms. "Maybe, maybe not…me, I just hope that next time we meet, we needn't cross sabers, huh Kim?"

Kim walked off. "Keep dreaming, Serge, keep dreaming."