"Shego – rock my world."
Oh. Well... doy, "Yes, Mistress" she said.
And she did.
"------------------------------------------------------"
Ron knocked softly at the door, "Uh, Kim? Shego? Uh... I need to... uh... talk to you. Uh... can I come in?
Resting her head atop Kim's bottom, Shego's eyes narrowed. The damn sidekick! Lucky she'd already 'rocked Kim's world' – because if he'd interrupted her fifteen minutes ago... well, that door probably wouldn't survive, either. "Go away!" she yelled.
"Uh... yeah. Look, Shego, we have a situation here... I really need to, uh, talk to you. Both of you..."
Shego jumped off the bed and lept to the door naked, too angry to bother with covering herself up. One hand lit with plasma - and before Kim could even come to her senses enough to ask what was happening - Shego flung open the door.
There was Ron, wide-eyed, with Rufus on his shoulder – equally wide-eyed. And behind him, twenty-five uniformed GJ agents aiming automatic rifles at her head.
Ron held out the clothes the two girls had left in the hall, "Uh... here..."
Shego slammed the door shut without taking the offering, "Kim! Get up! We gotta go!" Her survival instincts had taken over, and she was searching for a way out. The building would doubtless be surrounded, blasting a hole in the wall would just draw gunfire, and for all her Comet Powers, she was not immune to bullets. And neither was Kim... oh my god, Kim! What am I going to do about -
"Shego? What's going on?" the teenager said through her confusion. She'd just had her third earth-shattering orgasm, and still wasn't thinking quite straight. She'd heard Ron's voice... what was that all about? Why was Shego so frantic suddenly? Because of Ron? "What's Ron doing here? Did I hear him say -"
"He brought the GJ, Kim. He set me up! The whole thing was a -" she stopped abruptly. The whole thing was a trap? Kim was in on it? In her panicked state of mind, it didn't occur to Shego that if Kim had wanted to turn her in, all she had to do was march her down to Headquarters. "YOU? YOU were in on this? Kim... I... I... HOW COULD YOU?"
Kim was rapidly getting her wits about her – whatever was going on, apparently it was dead-serious. And Kim could deal with dead-serious. Besides her extreme martial-arts skills, that was really her only super-power: she could make snap decisions - in a hurry and under considerable stress - based on woefully insufficient information, and do it continuously as the situation changed.
"How could I what?" she asked, but the ex-Thief wasn't listening – she was busy ripping off an air-conditioner vent grill. Kim knew the problem was outside the door, whatever it was, but... Ron was out there. And he didn't sound frantic. She reasoned that she had time to get more info on the sitch, but Shego was obviously in some kind of... state... "Shego... stop. Calm down. Tell me what's happening." She hadn't meant it as a command, of course – but it was, anyway.
Shego stopped as if frozen in place, still pulling on the metal grill. And much to her surprise, she did calm down – it was amazing how that could work, and a little frightening, too. Well, so much for a quick escape, I guess she thought, resigned to her fate. Probably wouldn't have worked anyway. They've had too much time to get ready. I am going to KILL that sidekick of hers! Somehow – when she's not around... then her brain reminded her that she was supposed to be telling Kim what was happening. She sighed long and loud. This was the other side of the coin, then. Being helpless to someone's every command – even Kim Possible's - had it's down-side. Anger began to swell within her.
"Ron set us – set me – up. There's probably a whole division of GJ agents outside, armed to the teeth. We – I mean, I - am caught, it looks like." She stared at Kim as she let that sink in. "Kim... you didn't have anything to do with -"
"Shego! No, I... and I can't believe that Ron did either! There's another explanation... Let me get my... uh... uh-oh. You mean, they're right outside?"
"Right outside."
"Oh." Kim wrapped herself in a sheet and headed for the door. "Shego – just... just let me see what's going on, okay? Don't... uh, I'm sorry, but don't do anything, okay?"
Still naked, Shego plopped herself down in a chair. Obviously this wasn't going to be her show, Kim was running everything – including her. Might as well get comfortable. This sucked. Shego huffed in disgust at the situation. This was not her way way of doing things. At all. Kick-ass-and-sort-it-out-later was her way. Kim could see the frustration in her features and felt bad about commanding Shego like that, but... this was a Sitch, and she needed to handle it. She cracked open the door and peeked out.
"KP..." Ron said apologetically, "The word got out. I don't know how... I guess we had too many people in on this... uh, here's your clothes."
She just stared at him for awhile as the possibilities ran through her mind: fight, flight, or go along peacefully and see what happened. But she couldn't fight the Good Guys, nor would she flee from them; she was a 'good guy' for chrissakes! For now, there was only one thing to do.
"We'll be out in a minute, Ron. Tell them we'll go peacefully – they can put their guns down. I'll take care of..." She looked into Ron's eyes – did they know about Shego's... special... relationship with her? Had anyone told them? Only Ron knew... had he told... but wait – Dr. Drakken knew, too. So the whole villain world probably knew, and the GJ kept pretty close eyes on the villain world... They probably did know, then. Still, no use showing your cards just because you think your opponent knows what they are. "Tell them Shego will go peacefully, too. Okay?"
"Yeah, okay. Uh, KP – Kim? I'm sorry about this... I guess I didn't exactly 'have your back'..."
"It's okay, Ron. I know you're on my – our – side. Give us a minute." She closed the door and sighed. This was going to be a long night.
Shego had heard them talking, "So, you'll 'take care of me', will ya? Make sure I don't try to escape or anything. Make sure I don't light up and start mowing down agents... Make it easy for them. How convenient. For them."
"We don't have any choice Shego!" Kim shouted at her, "We have to play along! They are the good guys! I'm a good guy! And... you must have known something like this would happen... someday. Now hurry – uh, I mean..." Kim paused, she was about to start giving orders, but didn't want them to be orders, "Shego... I don't want to make you do anything, I really don't. So... will you do this the way I want? Will you get dressed and come with me and... and we'll see what happens?"
"Do I have a choice?" Shego's tone dripped with ice-water that chilled Kim to the bone.
"Shego... I... we don't have time for this! Will you please -" she began to plead, only to be cut off.
"DO I HAVE A CHOICE?"
It was a tense and silent moment before Kim could answer, "N – no. I -"
"Didn't think so" the Thief said curtly, and pulled the bundle of clothes out of Kim's hands, and searched for her underwear.
"------------------------------------------------------"
The ride to GJ headquarters was dead silent. Kim had to fight with the agent in charge just to ride in the same car as the green villain, but Shego showed no sign of appreciating the gesture. Not a word, not a glance. She pulled her hand away when Kim tried to hold it.
Kim almost had to fight the agents again to be allowed to stay in Shego's cell. But again, Shego just lay in her bunk and took no notice. She was thinking, Kim's just keeping an eye on me, is all. She knows I can't do anything as long as she's here to stop me – otherwise I'd have blown that wall out and be outta here by now. She liked the bitterness of that thought so much that she just kept repeating it to herself over and over, never realizing that Kim could simply order her to stay put and not attempt to escape. No, Shego had her mind made up, and wouldn't listen to anything that didn't fit her angry assessment. Even from herself.
"Ms. Possible?" a female guard said, in that polite buy menacing way that all prison-guard's acquired on the job, "Dr. Director would like to speak with you." She proceeded to unlock the door – it being a foregone conclusion that Kim would follow her.
Kim thought – just for a second – about actually going. It was like a conditioned-response; when the Director of the GJ asks to see you, you go. If she did go, it would be on Shego's behalf, of course. But she couldn't do it. It was a matter of principle by this point. They were in this together. Together! And nothing was going to remove her from Shego's side. Certainly not the polite respect of dropping everything at the beck and call of Dr. Director. Fuck 'polite respect'.
"Tell the Director she'll either have to see both of us, or come down here herself. I'm not leaving Shego."
The guard paused, and then snorted and re-locked the cell door. As she walked away, Kim heard her mutter "... dykes...".
Kim balled up her fist unconsciously, 'Dykes'? I'm STILL Kim Possible you... bitch! I've saved the world more times than you've... you've... well, a lot of times! GAWD! how can anyone be so... She looked at her fist and realized what was happening to her. So that's why the gays and lesbians always seemed so angry. So this is how it felt. She'd always just shrugged it off before – wasn't her problem. Now it was personal. She sighed and tried to force herself to be calm, Yeah, I'm a dyke. No matter what else I am, or what else I do, they'll always think of me as a "dyke" first. So I guess now I'm the "Dyke Teenage Heroine". Great. Just... freakin' great...
Dyke, kike, fag, nigger, spic... it was really all the same, wasn't it... We're different than you. That's all you care about... That's all you see...
"Don't let her get to you, Kim" Shegos voice drifted down from the top bunk, "They're everywhere – you can't get away from them. Nothing you can do or say will change her mind – ever. She's not worth getting worked-up over."
An unexpected bit of wisdom from the lover who Kim was sure hated her. "You're talking to me again?"
"Don't push it. I'm still mad."
"Yeah, well... me too. It's just... I wish I had someone to be mad with me" Kim said a little forlornly.
Shego swung her legs over the bunk and looked over and down at the top of Kim's head. "So, you don't think Ron set me up?"
"Of course Ron didn't set us up, Shego! Gaw! Look, I know you don't like him – for some reason – but he's... he's... well, he wouldn't do that. To us."
No. He probably wouldn't, at that. Damn boy-scout... Shego thought. Guess I was jumping to conclusions a little. Well, a lot. Okay, so I panicked. Panic is a good thing, panic has saved my skin more often than anything else.
"Yeah, he's okay, I guess. Just kind of infuriating sometimes, the way he does those... off-the-wall things he does and it always works out in his favor. And... well, I used to be jealous of him, y'know. Thought he was your boyfriend. So it's kind of like an old habit. Sorry."
Kim sat in shocked silence: she could understand Shego's frustration at Ron's Mystical Monkey Power – it was kinna weird – and it would be frustrating, from her point of view. But – jealous? That had certainly never occurred to her.
The lingering silence was wearing on Shego. She'd just admitted something about herself that she wasn't proud of, and Kim hadn't said anything.
"Kim.. I was kind of crazy back there. I don't like getting caught. In fact, I hate... Anyway, then you ordered me to stop what I was doing and 'calm down'... well, it just... I was mad at you for that. But... thinking about it, maybe you did the right thing – I don't think I could've gotten out of that mess alive. I probably would have tried, too. I was just really getting into, uh, the 'Mistress' thing, y'know, and suddenly the tables turned, sorta. I didn't like being commanded like that. I... I guess I hated you for it, for awhile."
Kim stood so she could face the other girl, "I didn't like doing it either. I didn't want to... I didn't want to have to... but, you were -"
"Yeah I know. Can we just forget about it?"
"Sure. So... friends again? I mean... you know what I mean..."
Shego wasn't ready to go quite that far yet, "Depends. Why are you here, Princess? Why'd you go piss off the guard – that's a bad habit to get into, by the way – instead of going to talk to your pal Dr. Director? You... keeping an eye on me?"
"Shego! No! It's just... It's just that I know how these people work. If they get us apart, they'll keep us apart, if only to give us another reason to get everything over with quickly. Say whatever they want... I mean... they know we're... y'know... -"
"Fuck-buddies?"
"SHEGO!" Kim cried, taken aback by the... the crudeness of that remark.
But Shego only smiled back at Kim's shock, her way of breaking the remaining ice, "Oh, yeah, 'lovers' I meant. Sorry." She had to restrain herself from giggling as Kim blushed.
Kim realized her chain was being pulled, "You're just so the bitch, aren'tcha... I think I love that about you" she said smiling back.
"And you are such the Princess. I swear, if I could get you to wear a sailor-blouse and a pleated skirt, I think -"
Outside the cell, Dr. Director cleared her throat, "Ahem."
"------------------------------------------------------"
Kim knew immediately who was standing outside the cell, what she didn't know was how long she'd been there – how much she'd heard. Had she given anything away?
"I should inform you – both of you – that people on either side of you can hear you. Now, Kim Possible, I'd like to talk to you... alone" the Director said.
Kim turned slowly to face her. Dr. Director was now – well, not exactly her enemy – but the opposition, anyway. She would need to handle this sitch carefully... and a good way to start, would be to show the Director that she would handle things on her own terms.
"I don't have anything to say that I can't say in front of her" Kim nodded toward Shego in the top bunk, "We are not going to be split up." The "period" was unspoken but almost audible just the same.
The Director was impressed – a fairly naive teenage girl was trying to lay down ground rules for her game. That took... balls. Kim had certainly never acted like this before. Obviously, Shego was the root cause of the change, but she needed to see just how far Kim would go, just how serious was this relationship - this new facet of one of her best future-agent's character.
"How many agents do you think it will take to get you out of there by force, Kim? I put it at about fifteen, provided they go in with their Tasers charged. And if Shego were to cut loose – well, we'll have a full-scale assault on our hands, I suppose. Which probably won't end until someone gets killed" Dr. Director paused for dramatic effect, "Shall I make the call?"
She's bluffing Kim thought, She wouldn't risk that much destruction just to get me away from Shego for an interrogation. She's bluffing... Isn't she? She MUST be bluffing! Dr. Director did have a reputation for bluffing – and for calling bluffs, as well. She also had a reputation for getting what she wanted by any means necessary, even if it meant going to absolutely ridiculous lengths. She might do it. But... why?
"You do what you think you have to, Doctor" Kim said, calling the bluff, and immediately sorry she did. "But... Look, we... you and me... we know each other... Can't we... I mean, Shego won't..."
"If the two of you will follow me? I'll take us to a more private place to talk" the Director said, unlocking the door and turning to go. She didn't look back to see if she was being followed. Kim was getting her way, but the Director had won the contest of wills – and Will was what mattered here.
Shego jumped down off the bunk and followed the Director, with Kim following behind. They went through the maze of the compound silently, Dr. Directors heels on the tile floor the only sound. Eventually, they were shown to a plain-looking room with a table and four chairs. Kim and Shego sat on the far side.
"Coffee?" the Director asked them. Standard procedure – get the interviewees comfortable.
"Could we just get on with -" Kim was saying.
"Please. Black." Shego said.
Dr. Director nodded at Shego and left them alone in the room to get the coffee.
"Shego, you know this place is bugged, right? We're probably on camera, too... this isn't time to get comfortable! She's good at interrogations. She has a rep for it. This isn't going to be fun..."
"I imagine I've been in more rooms like this than you have, Princess. I know what's going on. I also know that nothing happens quickly in jail, so you might as well take whatever they're willing to give you. Besides... exactly what are we trying to cover up here? I've committed no new crimes, you've never committed any, I imagine – I'm curious to see what she's up to, frankly. You think maybe we've been arrested for breaking Ohio sodomy laws?" Shego chuckled at the thought.
But it was a good question. Shego had a list of warrants – more like a book of warrants – so long, and going back three years... what was there to interrogate? She'd been caught on film, there were thousands of eye-witnesses to her crimes... and Kim? Kim might be considered an "accessory" for not informing the GJ of her whereabouts... but then, that went for Ron, Monique, Bonnie, Kim's parents...
"Here we are, then; black, right?" the Director said as she came back in. Kim eyed her warily.
"Thank you, Dr. Director. And may I say that's quite the stunning eye-patch you have there – it complements your hair quite well. Is it new?" Shego smiled and took a sip of coffee as the Director seated herself.
This was not the first time they'd met in an interrogation room. In fact, it was the sixth.
"Thank you, Shego. Yes, I finally decided to go all the way with it – custom made in England, you know. Finest silk. You're the first person who's dared to say anything, and I appreciate that. I see your outfit hasn't changed..." she glanced at Kim, "although I'm guessing that many other things have."
Kim stood up knocking back her chair "Could we cut the chit-chat here? What did you want to see me about? This isn't High Tea at the Palace!"
"Calm down, Princess" Shego tried not to laugh, "I told you – nothing happens fast in here. There's time for chit-chat, as you call it. Trust me, she'll get around to saying what she has to say when she's ready. And she knows we're not going anywhere."
Kim picked up her chair and slammed it back down some distance from the table. She sat in it crossing her arms and legs, "Well, excuse me for not being in the mood for conversation. My first time in jail, an' all. I'd like to get to the point."
Dr. Director and Shego exchanged knowing looks, and Shego could tell that the Director was enjoying Kim's show. Meanwhile, the Doctor could see by the look on Shego's face that she and Kim were, in fact, a couple. The bonds of any couple show best when they're in conflict, as Kim and Shego were now. It looked like that bond was probably destined to last a long time too. It was something about the way their moods and attitudes complemented each other even in disagreement. Yes, their relationship was serious. One question answered.
"I just want to get this over with" Kim said, then had another thought, "And before I say anything about anything, I want the cameras and microphones off. In fact, I want the room swept for bugs, too, now that I think about it. How did you know where to find us?"
Dr. Director considered her options: sweeping the room for eavesdropping devices would take time – time during which Kim would probably calm down, and thus lose her desire to talk just to get the talking over with. On the other hand, the girl had good reasons to be suspicious – the anonymous tip about Shego WAS odd. For one thing, it was untraceable. Very few phone calls – in face, none for years – were untraceable by the GJ... so a sweep might be a good thing. And if afterward Kim felt she could talk more freely, well then, that was the way to go.
"If you insist, Kim – and as a show of good-faith on the GJ's part – I will sweep the room. Afterward, I expect you to be as forthcoming as you can about anything I want to know. Deal?" The Director lifted her eye patch to emphasize the word 'deal', so that Kim would know it was a Big Thing the Director was doing – even though she was intending to do it anyway. Good to keep your opponent thinking they owe you, even if they don't. Especially if they don't.
"Deal" Kim said suspiciously. She was getting her way with Dr. Director... that was something to be suspicious about.
"Good" the Director said, and pulled something that looked like an over-sized Kimmunicator out of her coat-pocket. She pressed a button on it, and two tiny antennas sprung from the sides. She talked as she watched the display.
"Really, though, this room was just swept last week as part of normal house-keeping here, so I don't... really... hellooooo..." her voice trailed off.
"Something?" Kim asked. She didn't really expect the Director to find anything, either.
"Hmmm. Yes, a signal – but not conveying any information. More like... like a tracking beacon. But it's spread-spectrum, hard to lock on to... the common frequency-hopping algorithms don't seem to work. A custom-made job, then."
"That's nice, just find it and destroy it, is all I care about" Kim said impatiently.
"That would be a mistake, Kim." The Director walked around the room, pointing at the ceiling, the floor, the corners... at Kim... at Shego... "Here we go. Shego, would you stand up, please?"
It turned out to be the snap-button on her leg-pouch.
Which meant that it had to be Dr. Drakken. That would explain the home-brewed frequency-spreading code, too. And doubtless, that was where the anonymous tip came from...
If Drakken knew of her whereabouts... then he'd probably figured out that there was something between his ex-hired-thief and current arch-nemesis, Kim Possible. He no doubt saw an opportunity to get them both out of the way, at least temporarily. Which all boiled down to: he was up to something...
"Could I see that a second, Dr. Director?" Shego asked innocently.
"No, you cannot" the Director answered, putting the button in her pocket, "You probably intend to destroy it, your way of showing Drakken that he's been found out. Really, the both of you need to learn to see beyond the present. Dr. Drakken thinks you are where this button is, you see. We maybe able to use that."
"Fine" Kim said, still as impatient as ever, "you found the tracking button. So the drama. Can we get on with this now?"
"Very well, Kim" Dr. Director took her seat at the table again, "I asked you in here to find out what was going on between my best not-quite-agent and her former arch-enemy. I think I know part of the answer, now... But there are things I've... heard, that I want to know more about." She faced Shego, "What did you mean by 'the Mistress thing'?"
Shego sighed. Was the Director guessing? Did she have outside information? Did she have an alias on the Villain Internet Relay Chat? Probably. Well, fine then... but it was going to be hard to say... she studied the color of her coffee.
"Last winter, Kim and I were fighting in Drakken's lair – the one made entirely of tooth-picks? Well, anyway, she kicked me into Dr. D's latest prototype Evil Device. He called it the Hypno-Ray. It zapped me point blank – and then of course melted. So now I have to do whatever Kim tells me to. So I call her my 'Mistress' sometimes. End of story."
Without batting an eye, the Director looked over at Kim, still jiggling her foot impatiently, "Kim?"
"What she said is the way it is. I have nothing to add. Except... I'd really like to keep this a secret. But I guess that isn't gonna happen, is it..."
"Well see. So, what sorts of things do you tell her to do? Does your control of her have anything to do with why the two of you are a couple-"
Kim lept to her feet again, "No! No, absolutely not! I don't tell her to do anything, ever! I don't believe in that... it's... it's just wrong! Ask her how I feel! That's why she trusts me with it. That's why she... we got together... sorta... I mean... oh..."
"Under the circumstances, I don't think I can rely on anything she might tell me, Kim. Can you understand that?"
"She gotcha there, Pumpkin" Shego said smiling. This was kind of humiliating... but kind of fun, too. Kim was squirming now, under the Doctor's microscope. It's always fascinating to watch a professional at work.
"Shut up, Shego" Kim shot back, and then remembered how dangerous that was, "I mean... oh, you know what I mean."
The Doctor watched the expressions on their faces. "So it works as casually as that, does it? Everything you say, Kim?"
Kim stared at the floor, "Yeah. I have to be careful what I say, sometimes. Most of the time."
"That must be quite a problem for you, Shego..."
"Not as much as you'd think. Like she said, I trust her."
"I see. So I take it that..." the Director let the sentence fade as she realized that yes, it was obvious, the two girls had been playing sex games utilizing Kim's new power, and so it wasn't really necessary to ask what Shego had meant by "getting into the Mistress thing". No need to embarrass them. Besides, that was the kind of anecdote that might come in handy, someday... If only it were a secret... but she knew that at least one other person knew about Shego's condition, "And Dr. Drakken – at the very least – is aware of all this, is he?"
"Yeah" Kim and Shego both answered simultaneously. Shego studied her coffee again. She should never have told Drakken about it. Had she really thought he'd be able to fix it? Dr. Drakken was never able to "fix" anything... SO the stupid thing to do... The Director was right, she did need to learn to think ahead.
There was a knock at the door, and the Director got up to answer while the girls watched. Then the Director stepped out of the room and closed the door behind her. A minute later, she came back in, with the same guard at her side that had come for Kim previously.
Dr. Director looked at the two girls and tilted her head toward the guard, "She will see you back to your cell. It seems I have business to attend to, but we may be speaking again – and I mean today – so I'd appreciate it if the both of you would still be here when I do." She turned and quickly walked away.
Kim and Shego looked at each other. What was that all about?
"------------------------------------------------------"