Hey, everyone. Normal disclaimer here - I own nothing but my plotbunnies. Reviews feed the bunnies, by the way. :-) A Run At Something Real will be updated when I can get to it. Motivation and time for it is dwindling, though.
The bar was quiet when Reno walked in. As it should be. It had to be what? Three... four AM? Something along those lines. The key that let him in was stuffed back into his pocket, and he locked the door behind him - no sense in letting any strays in, right? He headed for the bar, snatching a glass and filling it with... what? Brandy, it smelled like. The bottle was put back, and he sat himself down on one of the stools, taking one gulp before sipping at the remaining liquid. It burned a little as it coursed down his throat, but he swallowed despite it. It felt good to drink at times like this. Times when it seemed there would be no digging out of the muck and mire left behind by Sephiroth... and the three brothers. They'd survived. Reno had no idea how, and perhaps respected Cloud all the more for his quick thinking in saving them. The three were confused, of course. Angry. The abandonment he was sure they all felt most likely fed the hurtful feelings inside them, but... the Avalanche team had been supportive. Even now, they slept above him, set on cots in the spare room of Tifa and Cloud's home. Or at least two of them were asleep.
Even as poised and stealthy as the three could be, no one could avoid the creaking stairs that lead from the home to the bar. He glanced up from his drink, somewhat surprised to see Kadaj standing in the stairwell, dressed in a pair of blue cotton slacks and a loose black teeshirt that fell off one shoulder (both of which were most definitely Cloud's clothing, being at least two sizes too big for Kadaj), returning his gaze with a mixture of curiosity and caution. Reno, ever the articulate one, merely lifted his glass at the silver-haired young man and gave it a little shake with the word "yo" flicking from his lips.
Just 'yo.'
This seemed to ease the tension just a bit. A faint smirk touched Kadaj's lips and he shook his head, moving away from the stairwell and heading for the bar, dropping onto a stool just a few feet away from Reno.
"Do you do this often?"
The question lingered in the air heavily for a moment or two before Reno answered it. "Nah. Only when it gets depressing," he replied, shooting the last mouthfuls of brandy down the back of his throat. "Too many deaths... too much to clean up," he elaborated. Kadaj had the decency to look somewhat ashamed. It was a brief flicker of guilt, but it was there.
"It was for Mother," the silver-haired man stated, suddenly appearing defiant. Reno scoffed, standing to place his glass in the sink. "Your Mother is a virus, Kadaj. Or... was," he added to the end, softer than before. "I'm not saying it to be mean, but.. its true."
Indeed, Kadaj had moved as if to rise, angry at what had been said. Even as the pseudo-apology was uttered, Kadaj appeared to sulk. "She wasn't."
"She was. I have the files to prove it, if you want me to go storming the ShinRa building at ..." he checked his watch finally, "Three forty-five AM"
Kadaj glared. But he seemed to calm a little. Just a little. "No... that's quite all right."
"You're not like Sephiroth, you know," Reno commented, earning a sharp, curious glance in his direction from those catlike, mako-glowing eyes. "You're not. You're more fun... more playful. I like it. Sephiroth would never laugh on the phone with me. Heh. Sephiroth wouldn't ever BE on the phone with me." That was most definitely the truth. Kadaj's shoulders rolled in a light shrug.
"She chose HIM over me, though."
Reno snorted then, dropping back down onto his stool and scooting an inch or two closer - rather enjoying the conversation despite himself. "She's stupid, then. You held your own against Cloud far longer than Sephiroth lasted. You came up with all the great ideas. Well.. at least brilliant ideas. Hell, you're better looking than he is, too."
Kadaj's silver brow rose at that, and he shook his head. Of course he didn't believe it. Reno sighed and managed a faint smile. "She -chose- HIM, though. That's got to say something."
"It says she's a moron."
Silence. Mako-green eyes flicked from the bar top to Reno, intense anger starting to melt. Reno had to commend Cloud and Tifa - they'd done well working with the three. Once upon a time, Kadaj would have slaughtered him for such statements. Now, he was crumbling.
"Tifa said that, too." Quiet. Heart-wrenched. The fury in his expression was already dissolving into... oh, sweet Shiva. The young man looked about to cry! Kadaj's eyes had closed, pressed tightly together, brows furrowed in a desperate attempt to control his emotions. It was too much. Reno reached out and rested a hand on the silver-haired man's shoulder.
At the touch, Kadaj wrenched himself away with a quick twist, his initial response being to reject the comfort being offered completely. But Reno persisted. The hand appeared again, laid upon his shoulder once more. His body tensed, as if to throw the hand away once more, but... no. No, he crumpled. Tears leaked from clenched closed eyes as he turned into Reno's form. For a moment, the Turk did nothing, afraid that if he reached out further to the other, he'd be utterly rejected. But as tears began to trickle down Kadaj's cheeks, however, the hand upon his shoulder tightened and pulled.
There was no resistance this time.
Kadaj melted into the pull, tumbling against Reno, who wrapped his arms about the other and held him gently as he cried. He said nothing, and for the longest time they stood still behind Tifa's bar, Reno letting the other young man grieve for the loss of what he thought his mother was. This wasn't the first time Kadaj cried for this, according to Cloud and Tifa. Nor did he anticipate it being the last. But it was the first time someone that didn't live there managed to get through to the man.
Minutes passed, and as he heard Kadaj's soft sniffs slow down he lifted a hand, cautiously lowering it into the silver strands of hair that coated Kadaj's head. At first, the young man tensed once more, but it didn't take long for the body in his embrace to settle and relax again. "Why? Why didn't she want me?" he whispered against the undone collar of Reno's shirt, and the Turk could only shake his head.
"I don't know, Kadaj. But... she was a fool. Of the two, I'd have chosen you in a heartbeat." He spoke the truth, too. But his reasons weren't just for Kadaj's fighting skills, or his ability to control the virus that was Jenova. A few more tears fell in a hot stream upon Reno's shoulder then, and before he could stop himself, he'd pressed a tender, comforting kiss upon the top of Kadaj's head. That did send Kadaj stepping back and away, though, and Reno cursed at himself mentally for caving in.
"Why?"
"Why what?"
Kadaj looked frustrated for a moment, tear-streaked face focusing its gaze like fire upon Reno's form. Eventually he spoke, hands flinging toward the ceiling in a fantastical, angry gesture. "Why everything! Why would you have chosen me? Why did you... did you... KISS me?"
Reno's cheeks warmed at that, embarrassed at his actions and inability to control them. "I told you why I'd have chosen you," he answered, half-honest. "You're beyond a master with Souba. You're intelligent. You're strong. You were already becoming your own person when you loyally gave yourself to the virus. But because you were, I think, Jenova chose Sephiroth. Perhaps rightly so. You were already showing signs you were able to resist her, hoping that she would choose you over him. You... You're too much like how Cloud was - you were turning into your own person, despite your loyalty to her," he answered, then turned his gaze down to his hands.
"As to why I kissed you... I don't know. I wanted to, I suppose. I wanted to do something to help take some of that pain away. To show you that .. if anything... I won't reject you. I don't think that what Jenova saw in you was a bad thing... not at all," he began to answer the second question, then glanced up at Kadaj once more, a faint smile wavering on his lips. "I.. I just care, Kadaj. I care about you."
The clone looked close to tears again, watching Reno with mistrusting eyes as he spoke. And when silence yet again crept between them? It took a few long, heavy seconds before the swordsman would speak again.
"You... care?"
No hesitation. "Yes. I care, Kadaj."
Confusion. Contemplation. It all clouded the silver-haired man's face for the longest time. When it did clear, he gazed upon the fiery Turk before him, nodding as if coming to some conclusion and was determined to stick to it.
"Do it again."
Reno actually blinked. "What..? Er... Are you sure?"
Kadaj's eyes narrowed, obviously not enjoying his order being questioned.
"Yes. Now... Do. It. Again."
Reno hesitated this time, but reached out to draw Kadaj to him nevertheless, moving to kiss the clone upon his head once more. What he wasn't prepared for was that Kadaj had -other- plans. Strong arms had lifted to wrap around his neck, even as Reno's own moved to hold the slender man to him. And as he moved to deliver that kiss, Kadaj tipped his head up and PULLED down. Lips met lips.
The kiss was furious at first. Hard and fierce as Kadaj determined just what this "caring" Reno felt was. But the Turk was having none of it. As soon as he could, he softened the kiss, instead coaxing the clone to settle... to calm. And as the body against Reno's own began to relax, there was no denying the content moans that echoed from each of them as the kiss continued. And grew.
When they both finally drew back, Kadaj looked at Reno as if in awe, while Reno appeared both confused and rather happy.
"You do care, don't you?" came the incredulous question, mako-eyes softening as he stared up into Reno's.
Reno chuckled quietly, nodding his response. "Yes... Yes, I care," he repeated. He really did, too. That kiss proved it not only to Kadaj, but to himself. It wouldn't be an easy road he'd chosen, being with Kadaj. But he'd made his choice, and he'd not be turning away from it.