Author's Note: The title of this chapter is so strangely relevant in my life right now. I just got my delayed baggage back from the airline after a month of travelling in Europe. I've done more than half of my trip without my suitcase and now I have it and it's so big and heavy, and I made all these plans assuming I wouldn't have to deal with it (I thought they'd just send it back to Canada and I'd have it when I get back). It's almost more annoying to have it. It's been such a saga. Oh well, always looking on the bright side. This chapter features our favourite underrepresented Slytherin with schemes up his sleeve, it's Albus! What's he plotting? Who knows. Plotting Potter hehe.

Content Warning: Drug use.

Chapter 14

Baggage

(Aura)

Dawn broke fitfully that Saturday morning, it seemed. It was as though the sun was having reservations about coming out. It seemed to me that it rose and fell a couple times before making any progress.

I took a shower, then dried my hair. It hung in soft, lazy spirals, the color of dark chocolate. My eyes looked tired. Of course, they did. They felt tired too. And I had a fluttering in my stomach, and I kept finding my fingers tugging at each other anxiously.

"Stop thinking about him," I breathed reproachfully at my reflection. But I couldn't. I just felt so damn stupid! I couldn't stop thinking about what a tosser I'd been to him. And I'd been too wrapped up in myself to notice. I sure as hell had never seen that tough side of him before.

And I'd thought he was gay... What kind of friend am I? I'm such a bitch, why would he ever wanna date me? At this point he could conceivably get any girl he'd like at this school. But he'd never been interested in girls before...until June. And she is one of the most beautiful girls in Hogwarts. Maybe he just stores up all his girl-karma until he can get the real bombshells. Quality over quantity.

I shook my head, trying not to imagine Riley in a slick Italian suit, strutting like a Playboy. Until Tuesday that image would never have been possible to conjure. It seemed like a lot of things were possible now though.

I stalked out into the mostly empty corridors. As horrifying a thought as it may be, there were actually people awake at 7:30 on a Sunday morning in late January. I sat down at the empty end of the Gryffindor table. I filled my plate with pancakes, sausages, bacon and other such delightful breakfast food I could lay my hands on. I was hungry, you know.

About halfway through my meal, I noticed a hunched-up figure near the center of the table. One bony elbow supported the dark head as he pored over a stack of parchment. Every now and then he would take a sip of coffee or nibble on a biscuit. I picked up my plate and sat down beside him.

"Morning, Professor Cavanaugh," I greeted him brightly. He peered over at me through squinting, sleepy eyes.

"Aura, don't you have a social life?" he asked groggily, rubbing his eyes.

"What?"

"Shouldn't you be hung over or something?" he clarified. I laughed.

"Ha-ha, Cav, I'm a good girl. What kind of Head Girl do you think I am?"

"A normal one," he said with a yawn.

"Right," I replied with a quizzical smile. "Why are you sitting here?"

"What do you mean?"

"You're at the Gryffindor table, shouldn't you be at the staff table?"

Cavanaugh straightened up and looked around, blinking hard.

"Blimey," he said. "Have a nightmare that I'm a student again and look what happens. Guess I'm still half-asleep." He yawned as if to emphasize his point.

"What are you doing up?"

"Oh, can't you tell?" he began dramatically, waving long-fingered hands at the mess of parchment before him. "The voices of my students were calling to me. I just had to get up and mark these essays. No, but really, I just couldn't sleep." He took a long draught from his cup. "And these are rubbish, I'd really rather be sleeping."

"Nice," I laughed.

I finished my breakfast and we chatted. Then he began to collect his stuff together, though rather unsuccessfully. I helped him out, then offered to help him grade his papers.

"Aura, do get a social life!" he cried, taking me by surprise.

"Uh, well..."

"Seriously, girl, how can you sanely offer to help a teacher on a Sunday morning at 8 am? Listen to yourself; you're mental."

"Well, it's not really like work when it's a cool teacher like you."

"Well, a little company might be nice. You grab some pastries; I'll grab my stuff."

We moved the party to his office where he sat with his long legs resting on the desk.

"So, who's up first?" I asked.

"Well, I'm currently working on the first-years," he answered. "For some reason I thought they'd be good to mark on little sleep. How terribly wrong I was." He started to mark one, blearily rubbing his face every now and then, while I curiously read through a poorly written paper. Then, Cav suddenly dropped his quill and put his face in his hands for a moment before he reached into the top drawer of his desk and pulled something small and brown out, putting it to his lips. It could have been a hand-rolled cigarette but for the smell upon lighting.

"Professor Cavanaugh! That's highly unprofessional!"

"You know what, I know all that, but I'm tired and I have a headache and you're a stress bucket so I think you should join me." He took a long drag, then handed it to me.

"I hope you know this is very uncomfortable for me," I told him gravely, even as I put the spliff to my lips.

"I'm honestly too tired for anything to really matter right now." Cavanaugh shrugged. We continued to smoke, filling the small office with thick grey smoke. It was the kind of smoke that moved around in slow motion. Wizards like to do things to their smoke. "I do have one favor to ask you though," he said after a while.

"Yeah?"

"Don't tell James about this. He's been bugging me for ages to have a spliff with him."

"Okay, I promise."

"Usually most of the time we talk is spent in him trying to get me to drink with him or smoke with him or tell him how to get into the girls' dorms or..." he trailed off. "Make fun of my love life..."

"Is there a way for a boy to get into the girls' dorms?" I asked.

"Pshh! No! It's completely impossible," he scoffed.

"Oh."

He blew several wobbly smoke rings that seemed to do the hula very slowly in the air. Then he frowned at them pensively.

"Although..." he mumbled. "There is...a myth that Helga Hufflepuff secretly altered the enchantment on the stairs of the girls' dorms so that a man could mount them...only in the accompaniment of his 'soul mate' or whatever you want to call it." He laughed doubtfully. "But it's just a story."

"Huh," I muttered, "weird."

"Yuup, I bet it was made up by a bunch of third-year girls 50 years ago," he mused. "All their sappy, romantic bullshit. Like this other myth about Hogwarts where there's some room at the end of a magic hallway where lovers who are meant to be are shepherded so that they're brought together anonymously. Weird shit, I tell you."

"Yeah," I replied.

"You feeling more relaxed yet?" Cav asked.

"No, not really," I answered.

"Hmmm. Maybe you need to talk about it then."

"No..." I said, though not reassuringly. "The problem is just that I can't turn off my brain, you know?"

"Yeah, I know how that's like." He nodded.

"I think...I think I might have fucked things up...I mean, been fucking things up...for a while." Cav nodded understandingly. "I invested myself so completely in some bullshit relationship with a total twat...I was so busy deluding myself about him that I didn't realize...but I'm so tired and I just don't want another relationship at all. So, I wanna stop feeling sick every time I think of..."

"Of?"

"Nothing."

"Of course."

"Look, I've gotta go," I said, standing up.

"Right. Good luck."

"Cheers." I left his office, not feeling very relieved, but markedly better in general. I blew out my cheeks, then decided maybe fresh air was what I needed. So, I started walking, figuring I'd take a leisurely tour of the school as students began to awaken, and pop in and out of doors. I did this, strolling around Hogwarts a lot. Whenever I was alone, I guess, because once I'd started my rounds I was never alone for long. And that was nice.

It wasn't long until I came upon a group of students taking advantage of a brief patch of sunlight as it illuminated a courtyard. I saw Freddie first; of course I did, but none of them saw me. They were fooling about around a stone bench upon which Scorpius, Eve and Lacey sat. The rest were Zaid, Thaddeus and Olivia. Scorpius nuzzled his face endearingly into Eve's neck and she giggled, but I saw her hand slide over and slip itself into Lacey's, who caught her breath.

Zaid and Freddie were in the midst of vying for the attention of the only single, straight female in their presence. And, as I watched, I realized that I no longer felt the all-consuming blaze of jealous hatred that I usually felt when I saw him. In fact, it was more of a gentle disgust. And just like that, I seemed to see him in a completely new light.

I realized what a sleaze he really was, and what he always had been. Beneath his slippery smile and crude eyes was just a delusional tosser. Delusional because he saw himself as far better than the filthy rat that he really was. How had I been so blind? It was true that he had been better at hiding his true nature back when we had first started dating, but now my mind reached back to those early days. The way he would smile at me, it had seemed so charming then, but now it looked demonic. He had been so sweet to me though, so understanding. But of course, it must all have been a charade. He truly didn't care about anyone but himself.

Then it hit me: I was finally seeing him the way everyone else saw him. The things that my friends had tried to tell me, but I was too stubborn to see. Stubborn? Or was it delusional?

"Oi!" a voice broke into my revelation, and I jumped, my heart doing a frantic somersault in my chest. It was only Albus though, standing at my side. He followed my gaze and gave me a knowing smirk. "Twat," he remarked, jerking his chin in the direction of Freddie.

"Thought he was your friend," I commented.

"He is. Still a twat though."

"You talk about all your friends this way?"

"Sure. If it's true," he answered. "Guess I'm just too honest."

"Guess so."

"So why are you spying on your ex, then, huh?"

"What? Spying? I'm not spying."

"Suuuure," he said, eyebrows raised.

"I'm Head Girl. Just making sure they're not breaking any rules, all right?"

"Whatever you say."

"Whatever. I'm done anyway."
"Okay, where d'you wanna go?"

"Uuuh...aren't you going to hang out with them?" I asked distractedly as my eyes wandered back over to the group of Slytherins.

"Well, let's just say you're more useful to me right now," he replied cryptically.

"Useful how?" I asked.

"Walk with me," he said, taking my elbow and pulling me in a new direction. "You can keep a secret, can't you?"

"Sure," I replied with a shrug.

"Good. That should make things easier."

"What things?"

"These things." He produced two black velvet bags from his rucksack, one small, the other slightly larger.

"What are they?"

"That's for me to know and you to find out," he replied cryptically. I raised an eyebrow and pulled on the drawstring opening of the larger bag.

"There's nothing in here," I said as I peered inside. But it felt like there was.

"This operation is too sensitive for you to actually know what's going on," he explained casually to receive a scoff and a glare from me. "What? Offended?" He was genuinely puzzled by my reaction.

"Of course! You think I can't handle a sensitive operation?"

"Well, I didn't really think about it..."

"If you want me to help you maybe you should tell me what it is I'm doing."

"It doesn't matter; it's got nothing to do with you."

"Well, what do you want me to do with these?"

"I want you to put this bag under Rose's bed, and this one in her bookbag," he ordered.

"What? Put this bag in her bookbag?" I held up the smaller bag.

"No, put what's inside of it in her binder."

"Doesn't feel like there's anything in it."

"Well, there is. Just feel around."

"So why am I putting these in Rose's stuff?"

"None of your business."

"It is, though."

"It's nothing."

"Is it, though?"

"Shut up."

"Tell me!"

"No!"

"Then I'm not doing it."

Albus let out a frustrated sigh and threw his hands to his head.

"It's just something that will make her realize something, okay?"

"Realize what?"

"I'm sure you'll find out in the future."

"Fine," I relented, rolling my eyes. "Which bag is which again?"

"This bag," he pointed at the bigger one, "has a bag inside it-"

"Not another bag!" I cried in mock horror.

"Yeah, this bag has to go under Rose's bed, got it?"

I nodded to demonstrate that I understood.

"And this one has a letter. That you will put in Rose's books, okay?"

"Fine," I said again, chewing my lip uncertainly. "Are you sure I'm not doing anything bad though?"

Albus scoffed and rolled his eyes.

"You really think I'm trying to fuck up my cousin's life?"

"You are in Slytherin." I shrugged.

"Just trust me. You'll see how this plays out in the end, I'm sure."

We sat down on a bench in a deserted courtyard, the sun straining to reach over the turrets of the castle, a few rays succeeding and streaking down to pierce the foliage of the domestic apple trees and cast a dappled light on the flagstones. There was a silence, filled only with the chirping of birds as they wheeled and dived in the crisp winter air.

"Have you ever..." I started shakily, "you know, been in love?"

"Never," Albus snapped instantly.

"Oh. Lucky," I replied softly. "It's just a big mess."

"Yeah, I bet." There was another short silence, then Albus spoke again. "Do you ever wish you could take it back?"

I meditated upon the question for a while, thinking back to the way I was before Freddie stole my heart. I had been determined to not let social or emotional difficulties get in the way of my perfect GPA. I had avoided parties and gatherings like the plague, doing extra coursework so I could get ahead. And in my spare time I had written poetry... Wow, I hadn't even thought about poetry for years, not since I started dating Freddie. There were so many aspects of myself I had lost along the way, because somehow, being in a relationship with him had changed me, compromised my identity.

"I don't know..." I said. I was certainly more naïve back then, considering how easily I had been fooled into loving a despicable human being. But was I better off now than then? Had I been improved by this experience? I didn't know. I only felt stupid and worthless. "Yeah. I guess I do. I wish I had never fallen in love with Freddie."

"Hmm. Do you think you'd be a stronger person?"

"Yes...No... I dunno..." I frowned down at my lap where my fingers had once again taken to nervously tugging at each other. I couldn't believe how confused I was. Had I always been this lost? Who was I... "Who am I, Albus?" He looked at me sympathetically, but there came no answer.

That evening I found myself hovering anxiously outside the sixth-year girls' dorm, black bags behind my back. None of the girls were in there, I had noted them all as they left the common room, but I was filled with a cold sense of guilt. Or maybe it was dread. I felt like a criminal as I stole into the empty room, shutting the door behind me in slow motion.

I made my way to Rose's bed and sat myself on the edge of it, placing the velvet bags on my lap. I wondered what was inside, why it was so important, why Albus wouldn't tell me what it was. I pulled the small bag open and reached inside. What I felt was an envelope, what I saw was, well, nothing. My hand clasped nothing, as far as my eyes were concerned. I made a point of not putting it down, knowing I'd never find it again, then I slid the nearest book over and slipped the letter under the front cover. I put the book back where I found it, then turned to the other bag.

Reaching inside, I felt cloth, a cloth bag with a drawstring at the opening and filled with what felt like little pebbles. I pulled it out to find that, yet again, my hand held nothing. Curiosity raged within me, filling me with the insatiable urge to pull out my wand and reveal the object for what it really was. There must be something important inside, but what? I wracked my brain for every magical item I could think of that would resemble pebbles; smoke bombs: maybe Albus was plotting something, something that could only be accomplished under cover of smog. It could be jewels; maybe Albus robbed a vault at Gringotts and is planting the evidence in his cousin's possessions so she will take the blame.

The more scenarios I came up with, the less likely they seemed. I knew there was only one way to really find out what I held. I took my wand out and pointed it at the bag, or where I supposed the bag was, and silently cast a revealing spell. Only, nothing happened, nothing save a slight itch in the palm of my wand hand. I put my wand down on the bed beside me and looked at my hand. To my alarm, a tiny black splotch had appeared, like a drop of ink from the tip of a quill onto a blank piece of parchment. And, just as it would on parchment, the ink spread out, ever confined within its amœbic outline, until it consumed my entire palm. Then the blackness receded until all that was left were the words, "curiosity killed the cat".

I glared at the sentence, and rubbed at it with my left hand, but the ink remained. I scowled at myself too, for underestimating Albus' wizardry. Of course, he would have thought of this. He hadn't wanted me to know what was in the bags, of course he would have assured I stay ignorant. And now I just knew he would make a point of viewing my hand, to see whether I had attempted to sneak a peek at his top-secret plan.

"Scourgify!" I hissed as I took up my wand and pointed it at my spoiled palm. It did nothing, just as I had expected. Slytherins are always serious when it comes to jinxes. I tried again, different spells to get the ink off, anything, but of course it remained. "Must be time-locked," I groaned aloud, then I flopped back onto the bed in defeat. That was when I heard voices outside the door. My heart leapt into my throat as I jerked up. I ran my hands over everything in the immediate area to make sure it was back the way it had been when I entered. I shoved the bags back into my pocket, then turned around a couple times, trying to look innocent.

But when the door opened, it wasn't Rose or June, or even anyone from the dorm. It was Teagan and Amelia. They were giggling at their conversation when they walked in, but then they stopped when they saw me.

"Oh! Hey, what are you doing here?" Teagan asked.

"I was looking for a book, a book that I lent to...Dima," I said quickly. "But it doesn't look like it's here, so..." I moved to the door.

"Oh, cool. We're just here 'cause June sent me up to get her wand," Teagan replied. "Like seriously, you live in a castle, take your wand with you everywhere! It's what I've learned." I laughed, then slid out of the room as gracefully as I could manage with my heart pounding heavily in my chest. I was out though, and it was done. I looked down at my ink-stained hand and scowled with exasperation.

I made my way back to the courtyard where Albus and I had sat earlier, and I fiddled with my fingers and checked my watch. I looked at it five times before I finally registered the time. It was quarter to one. I realized I hadn't had lunch, and I was getting hungry. I had just made the decision to go to the kitchen and get something to eat, when I sensed someone's presence beside me. I looked, then jumped and squealed with shock when I found Albus seated on the bench.

"How long have you been there?" I asked, placing a hand over my heart. He grinned impishly and didn't reply. "You come from a very crazy family."

"Well, did you do it?" he asked.

"Yeah."

His eyes flicked down to my lap where my hands were clasped. The ink wasn't visible, but I knew he was wondering.

"Well thank you very much for your service, Aura," he said pleasantly. "You're a champ." He patted my hand a couple times, then grabbed it and turned it over.

"Hey!" I screamed as the black stain showed itself. Albus was thrown into fits of self-congratulatory laughter. It was moments like these that I saw the unsettling resemblance between he and James.

"I knew it! I knew you wouldn't be able to help yourself!" he snickered. "Always gotta know everything, don't you, Aur?" I frowned sourly at him as he continued to chuckle as well as hold my wrist. "You're always so controlled...why don't you just let go..." he leaned in closer, "every...", closer, "once...", and even closer, "...in a while?" He hovered with his lips an inch away from mine for an agonizing moment, his scent, so subtle before, now so overpowering, or maybe it was his piercing blue eyes. I didn't move; I was too shocked and confused. So, he moved back, but our lips brushed just briefly before he did. My breath caught in my throat as I watched him shrink back from supersize to life-size. "Still can't let go," he concluded, chuckling again, then he stood up and walked out of the courtyard, leaving me alone.

A couple hours later, I sat on my bed while Jade and Marcy chatted on the other side of the room. I watched the teeth of my hairbrush run through the river of hair that cascaded down past my chest. I brushed it absently, my mind elsewhere. I pondered the way I lived...

Maybe I would stress less if I just stopped trying to understand everything...control everything...Maybe that's my problem, I can't enjoy anything because I'm always too busy overanalyzing everything and driving myself insane...Maybe I just need to...let go...

I dropped the hairbrush, then closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I envisioned black velvet bags, huge ones, full to burst, perched atop my shoulders. They blended in with the black sea of my hair. I saw them being lifted away. The heavy burden removed from my shoulders by some unseen, unknowable force. When I opened my eyes, my heart felt lighter.

I took a walk through the castle, down to the Great Hall where several students were seated for a late tea. I scanned each of the tables until I found what I was looking for, and my breath caught in my throat, suddenly, inexplicably. It was as if I had just seen that head of curly chestnut hair for the first time, even though it was all that I saw of him. I combed my fingers through my hair instinctively, then walked over, trying to be casual, but suddenly feeling it a rather difficult task. I tried to envision the bags being lifted away again, as if by angels, or birds or helicopters, whatever. Whatever. Whatevs.

A group of students walked in front of me, clamoring, stopping and starting every now and then as they picked fights with each other. I was just making to walk around them when I felt a twinge at the back of my neck, like someone had just plucked a hair out. I put my hand over the spot, and turned around, looking everywhere in the immediate vicinity, but there was no one behind me, not even in the hallway.

"Hey!" Riley called out, almost making me jump.

"Hey," I was going to reply. I tried. I opened my mouth, I said it...but nothing came out...nothing.

Then I began to feel dizzy, and the back of my neck began to sting even worse than before, and the next thing I knew, darkness had fallen, and so had I.