Wow, what is this? Two chapters in the same year? I must be crazy!

No, I'm a jobnick soldier.

Story too long to tell, and you won't get it anyway. But I'm happy to be one, too bad I had a case of idioticy today. I washed my bag while some very important documents were still inside.

Oh, Passover is upon us, happy holyday for all of us.

Onwards to the chapter, more conclusions that follow my own brand of logic, enjoy reading the digging as much as I've enjoyed digging the digging.

Chapter 07 – Logic Thinking is The Mother of All Shit

"Inuyasha?"

"I'm here, right next to you" He answered.

"Why did it have to happen?" She asked.

'It didn't have to happen' Inuyasha thought to himself, he admitted to himself that he grew older from the days when things happened by themselves. "It's happening because I wanted it to happen" he said.

"For what reason?" Although she felt it was far too early in the morning for it, but Kagome has already started to calculate exactly what he meant.

"for all the wrong reasons, I guess" Inuyasha said to her, forcefully seating up, telling himself that this was no time to lay around in the car, no matter how pleasant it was.

"All the wrong reasons?" it didn't seem to Kagome like an excuse, he could have said that something was after her, he could have gone for the 'knight in shinning armor' play again, why didn't he do so? Did he suspect that she wouldn't believe him? Why would he think that way? For all he knew, she was still a civilian, he didn't know she knew about the Night Hounds, what was easier for him than making up a calculated lie?

She felt him changing his position and only then noted that her hands were still on his body, Kagome tried not to blush when she moved away.

"How are we getting to South America?"

"A plane to Mexico, I've secured us a sanctuary there, and then we simply cross the border by foot" he immediately asked himself why did he confess his plans so easily, without even inquiring how she knew their future direction.

'Why not take a plane to Brazil or something?' Kagome asked herself, was it another way to avoid giving away their direction? In the same sense, why couldn't he simply ask Kagura to bring them there? 'unless he doesn't want his brother to know what he's planning…' She kept following the thread of thought, if Sesshomaru finds out about Inuyasha's target place, how would he respond? She felt that most of Inuyasha's rush was simply getting at south America, which meant that once they were there, they would be untouchable?

Then why worry so much about the means of transport? Wouldn't it be easier to take the fastest route and throw everything else to hell? The only way to stop him would be to place someone at every airport in the world to stop him from boarding a plane.

'CRAP, damn, shit, to hell with it all'

Something then hit her, say there was a place with no law whatsoever, a place that every criminal could run to and no one would go in after him, would the criminal youkais truly miss out on such a place? The stories about ancient youkai's were still only legends. Then why did none of the criminal demons travel to south America already? The answer was simple, a system of tracking the demons before they get there, which means that there were already people in the airport ready to stop demons from getting on the flights to south America.

"Listen, Kag, there's going to be a lot of catching up for us to do… but for time being, can you simply trust me?" Inuyasha asked.

Trust you? Again? I did this mistake once and all it got me was heartache, I swore to myself never to go through this again, never. You're probably expecting me to be in a state of shock and god knows what, well, I'm not. I'm about to make you tell me everything I need to know, and you won't notice it even, would you? You're still the same, you won't look at me for a second beyond what goes for you, aren't you?

What is it this time? You've discovered a twin gem for the shikon gem? Something that was dropped there ages ago and because of the special conditions in that place you couldn't afford to search for it on your own?

Have you become a coward as well? Are you so afraid of what lives there that you won't dare facing it alone? Even if there really is a 2nd shikon, what would you do with it? Do you happen to have anymore zombic girlfriends? Or do you still wish to become a full blood demon?

"I don't if I can, Inuyasha" Kagome bit her lips, she was always told that there were better ways to create the 'painful and full of doubts' relief, but none worked for her, "it's been so long, and so much happened this past days…"

"Don't worry, Kag, I swear that nothing will happen to you, everything will be fine"

Why is it that I'm feeling remorse now, just when I've passed the point of no return? Have I made a mistake? I thought the plan over many times, sure, it's the most dangerous thing, it can set the world million years back, but didn't I think about it already? Did I think about it enough? Was I delusional? Why are my legs shaking? Where did all my confidence disappear to? Didn't I wake up this morning feeling like I could take on the entire world and beat him with my hand tied? Why am I feeling so bad right now? Is it because of that dream that I lost all confident in myself, in what I've strived for in the last 80 years?

And Kagome, have I caused her more damage? It must be some curse that I'm carrying, make every woman I know unhappy, mother, Kikyo, and now Kagome..

Now? Am I kidding myself? I brought her into a world of fighting and violence 500 years ago, I snatched her away from the peaceful life she was having. Do I have the right to do so again?

No, I need to stop thinking this way, since when do I care about rights? I am still me, Inuyasha, a man willing to kill and die for my selfish desires, so if I have to sacrifice the world, so be it. And if I still don't get what I want, I'll throw the world into havoc again and again, until I get it. No more looking back, Keep pushing forward until I get her.

"Let's go, we can't use the van anymore, we'll go by public transportation" Inuyasha said, ignoring the fact that he was back in his youkai form, and his cloths were still stained by blood.

"shouldn't you take a bath before, or at least change out of what you're wearing?" Kagome suggested, not noticing how easily she gave up on her info milking plan.

"You're right…" He said, suddenly becoming aware of his state, and coming to realize that he was beginning to act unreasonable, within just a few hours 400 years of espionage thinking were gone down the drain.

"Are we there yet?" Kagome asked.

"haven't you ever flown a transatlantic before?" Inuyasha answered, "it usually takes fourteen hours to get there..."

"It seems that I've been catching up air miles lately, the jet lag will be horrible"

"Probably, but we can't afford to stay a night in an hotel yet, you'll have to stay moving for the next forty hours, after that, we can start taking things slowly"

"I don't know where to start, dear Kagome, I never thought I'll have to write this letter alone.

I guess you would say that it's best to start from the beginning; Miroku would have probably said the same, I don't know whether Shippo could really deliver this scroll to you once you're born, and as for Inuyasha… he refuses to speak, hear and most likely even to think of you. Not surprising by the least, of course, it seems that his relationship with Kikyo isn't going so well nowadays…

No, there's no need for you to read that, this is my letter from me to you, a conclusion, if you want to call it by a different name.

After you've left, me and Miroku have gotten married, for some reason, I was surprised that he asked me to become his wife. Looking back, I think that I always held those doubts about our marriage, perhaps that was what ruined our last days together.

Again, I'm running ahead of myself, I should get back to the chronological order of things. Obviously, I agreed to his proposal right away, and we set on to build a home for ourselves. It sounded easy, at start, a small hut, one room for the two of us and a room for Shippo (who was staying with us at that time).

If you're asking yourself about Kohaku… he left with Sesshomaru, actually, he left with Rin, and Sesshomaru insisted that he should be responsible for the two of them. If you're wondering, they have a daughter, she looks exactly like I did when I was young.

I should really stop jumping between subjects, I never knew it was so hard to write off your own life, is it because it usually is done close to your death? A sort of last summarize of what you've done in your life, Success and failure, love and hate? All the things that you could have done differently, all the things you should have changed but never dared to act?

Back to the house we were building, the original plan was simple, too simple, it took me one look to see that there were no plans for a kids room. Can you believe it? Miroku, the man that offered every woman in the world to bare his child (except me, if you remember), didn't even think about that, so I had to take matters into my hands.

It was a complete disaster, instead of two months for the original hut and two more for the extra rooms, we've worked over a year to complete it. The entire story might have been just a silly memory, if the rooms wouldn't have stayed empty since the day they were completed. Yes, our house has never heard the rolling laughter of a child, nor did it hear the endless fighting between teenage boys and an over protective mother.

I don't know who was hurt more by it, three years after we've gotten married, I've decided that I should be checked by somebody.

Dear Kagome, excuse me for writing what I'm about to write, I'm perfectly aware of how you must have felt when Inuyasha and Kikyo have gotten back together. I too have never forgiven him for it, but I couldn't act the same way towards her. Just like me, she wanted to find happiness with the person she loved, I know that you were angry at the two of them, but I also know that your heart wasn't so narrow that you couldn't understand her feelings. Trust me, I'm sure that she felt exactly the same as you have when Inuyasha was hurt during that fight. She cried alongside with me when she told me that because of the shikon effect I could never be pregnant.

I think that was the first time I tried to push Miroku away, perhaps it was because he never pressured me to have a child, maybe I took on his burden myself, at first I tried telling him to spend time with other women, just so that he could have a successor to his bloodline, when he objected by saying that he could never leave some woman with his child I told him that he should divorce me and take a different wife, he refused to listen to me. I kept pressuring him into ideas like that, I told him to have sex with any woman, and that I would take care of the baby, I become obsessed with giving him a child, even if it wasn't mine.

I don't remember how he got me to stop suggesting those ideas, but the thought of the Houshi bloodline dying always bothered me, did I feel guilty that Kohaku has found himself a life with Rin? Or did I feel that the only reason Miroku married me was to continue his bloodline? I know that it's stupid, but ten years ago, when he was on his deathbed, all I could think about was finding him someone to bear him a child, I traded no more than a few words with him during his last month. Of all things I've done, I regret that the most, I was too insecure of my worth and too suspicious of his to live our marriage to the fullest, Miroku passed away with no one by his side, because I never matured from my first impression of him.

And today, with no more than a few months left for me, I look at the empty rooms inside our and think back to the time that he suggested building the two room hut, could he have known already that I could never give him a child? or did he simply not want one anymore after the battle? Be it the first or the last reason, it makes me miss him even more.

I don't know at what point of life you'll find this letter, maybe you're happily married, but if you were, Shippo probably wouldn't have given you the letter.

So, sweet Kagome, listen to a dying woman last advice, Trust your lover a bit more, it'll probably hurt, but in the end, you might not end like me.

"Inuyasha" Kagome turned to the hanyou, which was getting comfortable under the airline's blanket, he turned to her, signaling her to continue, "Hypothetically, I mean purely hypothetically… what do you think would have happened if after we killed Naraku together things would have been different?" She asked.

He turned to her, it was a question he never allowed himself to think through, until today, there was no point thinking about that matter, he has made a decision and lived with it, further uncertainties would only have bad effects on his life.

"You mean had I married you and not Kikyo?"

Kagome quickly turned her head from him, wondering to herself why did he have to jump so fast into the possibility of marriage, she hoped that he wouldn't notice her blush, "for example, hypothetically, of course"

"well, I guess we would have lived in some nice castle near the sea… you like the sea, don't you? I remember reading that Tokyo girls made it a tradition to visit the sea at least once a year, so living by the sea would be nice, won't it? No, you would probably ask to live somewhere near the well, so you could visit your family more often…" He started saying, noting to himself that perhaps he has stayed away from Japan too long if he didn't knew almost anything about the younger generation.

"actually, you might have wanted to keep on living in your own era, at first I would have resisted, but then you would tease me and say the only reason I don't want to go is because I'm afraid of the modern world, ain't I right?" Inuyasha looked at her, she was taking comfort in the blanket, only then he noticed that she didn't take the blanket from beneath her chair, but pulled the one he was using.

"I might have, you would say that as a hanyou you weren't fit to the 21 century, and you would have made my life hell by staying by my side all day long without letting me go to school or hang around with my friends"

"Wait a moment, Kag, you say that if I followed you around to school or to your friends it would be hell, but you don't say anything about the possibility that we would have stayed in my time and would have been together 24/7?"

"that's different, in the feudal age I needed you to be by my side for protection, otherwise I would get eaten by ten youkais each day"

"first of all, last time I checked, you were the one to drive back Naraku's evil miasma cloud, so if you really wanted to, you could have taken care of just about any youkai in Japan" Inuyasha started.

'was it really true?' Kagome asked herself, didn't she somehow beat shippo only a few days ago? 'and I was really the one to put the first wound on Naraku, what am I so afraid of?' if so, why wasn't she used in dangerous missions? To keep her from getting harmed? 'Or to keep me from putting my power into use?'

"Second, if anyone was in danger from passing through worlds, it was me. I could have died from a car accident, an antenna falling on me, a piano falling on my head or even just from licking an electric plug… the modern times is a battlefield of safety hazards" He stopped a moment to breath, "free me a bit of the blanket, while you're trying to explain your hostage syndrome"

Of course, Inuyasha knew very well that there was a blanket under each of their seats.

"I have no hostage syndrome, whatever it means" Kagome replied, "I'm just saying that if we would have stayed at my time you would make me a prisoner by over attention, at the feudal times there could have been a separating line between me as your wife and me as a person at my own life"

"That's just like saying that being my wife wouldn't be true, or at least would be cancelled whenever you go back to your 'real life', you don't really think I'd accept being 'husband on call', that only has meaning when you're at the feudal times"

"are you getting insulted by a hypothetic question? And besides, stop taking all the blanket to your side, it's called at this attitudes"

"I'm not insulted, I'm shocked. That being fuckin' cold hearted, Kag, and that's why you're so cold, it's not because of the attitude or anything"

'Did he just say the F word? Why does it surprise me? I haven't heard him saying it the entire day… getting tired of the act already, Inuyasha? Back to your old self so fast? Stop hogging the blanket already, shouldn't you be saying the blankets are for weakling humans?'

"Oh, that's low, out of reasonable comebacks already? It's hard to believe that you run the international section with so little patience"

Kagome immediately stopped her sentence, 'How can I be so stupid? What's wrong with you, Higurashi? You are no idiot rookie at this job, just keep your mouth shut!"

"You say to(may)to, I say to(ma)to(u), now fork over some of the blanket, I've been bleeding over one third of my blood last night, I need some sleep"

"here, take some of it" Kagome covered him with of the blanket, also moving a few centimeters closer to him at the process, "just tell me, if we would have gone to my time nine years ago…"

"Five hundred and nine years, by my counting"

"Nine years ago, I've got the schedule lined somewhere back home. But if we had gone to my time, would you really be afraid of all those things you said before?"

"Terrified, would be sticking to you like super glue"

"How would you justify your behavior?"

"Probably by saying something really stupid like that there are youkais trying to hurt you'"

Obviously, that's what you always say.

Chapter seven – end

Lets see, no reviews for the last chapter, so there are also no shout outs, and no questions to answers… not much left to write here, I'd just say I've updated my profile about two weeks ago.