GUILT AND HEALING
" why did i do something so rash?" Kagome thought to herself. " was i thinking of only my dear inu and me? why didn't i consider the other people
it would hurt? why didn't i think about how much it would hurt me to have to do this? didn't i think about how hard it would be for sango and miroku
to get all of the shards and kill pot-head?"
suddenly on the ground in front of sango lay a note. she opened it and read:
Dear family,
i am dearly sorry that i did something so rash but i had to do it. i love you and am sorry you are going through so much pain from me. i wish you
wouldn't cry. it pains me to watch this display of tears and tissues. you don't know that i loved inuyasha dearly. mom i know not who my father is
but i can only imagine (and hope) that you loved him the way i do inuyasha. i was planning to confess my love before i found out about what i was
going to do. i couldn't put him through that much pain. now i have to wake him and come back to finish all unfinshed business. do not morn for me
because i will be back if not sooner than later.
sincerely
kagome
sango read the first line and gave it to sota. his glassy eyes ran back and forth as he read and tried to stiffle his tears. ;he passed it on throughout
the family and t;hen looked to her.
" how did you get that?" he asked with a voice that wavered like a see-sow.
" Kagome is around here somewhere. she chose to stay in a purgatory instead of going to heaven." she explained to the confused
preteen, then pulled the note that kagome had given her earlier that day.
once agian the tween's eyes darted from one end of the crinkled paper to the next. " ok. i get it" he said as he passed the note to his
hesterical mother.
" how could she do this to us? did she think not of the pain this would put us through? i knew i shouldn't have let that thing ;take her back to
those times. it was not for her. and now look what she has done. she has ;fallen in love with a monster, comitted suiside, and desgrased me in
front of a guest." she vented
" please don't be mad at her she only did what she thought was right. you would have done the same thing in her place. and that thing you
speak of is the love of her life. he has saved her countless times. only someone as blind as you wouldn't see that." sango justified
"how dare you judge me, you're probably a common born bastard, a camp followers brat who spreads her legs for any passing man, just
like your mother" she retorted.
" my mother was never like that you slut. she was a dignafied demon slayer unlike you. and i laugh at your ignorance. if you knew me well
enough you would know i'm constantly groped and hit on and now once have i done anything i regret. i'm a virgin not a whore like you." sango
shot back.
kagome dropped another note.
SANGO! how dare you say that! she IS my mother. she DID raise me. and oh by the way you are both on a hormone rush so cool it.
then another note dropped in front of her mother.
MOM! how could you say that. do you not remember all the times that i told you about miroku! her parents died and she is not a bastard!
her only family is a boy that is being kept alive by a shiken shard that belongs to naraku!
" you may be dead kagome but i don't ever want to hear you speak to me that way. i am your mother." the angry woman scolded
then kagome appeared next to sango where she had been standing the whole time. " you may be my mother but you are also offending
my best friend. she is the person who held me in her arms as i died. i hate using up my time that may be needed later on these insolent
reasons. so shut up. you know i love him but you wouldn't understand something as deep as that would you? now if you would please let sango
read the will and stop looking like you just saw a ghost." she said and dissappeared while laughing at her ironic pun.
every one of them had porclin faces plastered over thier regular ones. eyes wide at not only that they had just seen a dead person but
because of what she had said.
eyes wide her mother went on a mumbling rampage " i never tought you to say such things to your elders. and you know i grew up with a
single mom so i know what it feels like missing a piece of family. just because i don't know who your father is gives you know reason to say
something like that. you know i was raped. it was a traumatic accident that i will never live down. granted i was a stripper but that still gives you no
reason to say that. i never will forgive you for a comment like that. i lost my virginity and my integrity but that wasn't my fault."
another piece of paper dropped in front of sango.
crap i didn't know that is what happened. i thought i was born after my parents broke up. she never said that but i assumed that cuz
whenever i went to ask her she would start bawling. no wonder. now i feel really bad. i can't believe i said that. please tell her i'm sorry and that i
didn't know. if you're wise you'll do the same.
" kagome says she's sorry and so am i. we never ment any harm." apoligized sango as she stared into kag's ma's hurt eyes brewing
over with tears.
" it's okay i was the one who started it. i just hate when people call me things like that cuz it's only true." she sobbed
an eerie breeze blew across mrs. higurshi's face and dried her tears instantly. then the hair that was covering her face was tucked behind
her ears.
" thank you kagome" she said " let's get to that will"
by the time the will had been read and the possetions distributed sango as well of the rest of the family had puffy red eyes and tear stained
faces. if someone were to come into the house that second first they would look sceptically at the girl wearing a slayers outfit then look into the
sad eyes of everyone and turn right around to show themselves out. kagome looked into the eyes of her brother who was hurt the most and
couldn't bare herself. had she not already done it, she would have committed suiside.
" i don't know how much more of this i can take" she thought silently to herself.
She pulled out one of the 496 pieces of paper she had left and wrote this:
Dear Mom and Sango,
I'm going back to the past. I can't take this tear-fest anymore. Love yall.
Kagome.
She dropped it onto Sango's lap and jetted. ' Now time to get to the feudal era and look at my belovide's face. Then i have to write out full
blown instructions for Sango and Miroku.' she mentally planned as she floated into the well house and through the well.
Sango read the note and told the family it's contents.
" I really need to get back to the past. I will come and get you for Kagome's creamation." stated Sango as she stood up.
" okay then. tell kagome we love her" said the boy in the corner that had been silent throughut almost the entire evening.
" will do" she confirmed and headed for the door.
Back outside she looked at the cloudless sky. Why couldn't she see the stars and milky-way? Had they dissappeared or was the wretched
light blocking their beautiful glow. She decided to go back home and sleep. All that running and crying was catching up to her. When she walked
into the wellhouse she heard a russle in the darkest corner.
( A/N sorry it took me so long to update agian. I was fighting a seemingly endless war. Now that i've got alliences like sensie and
nawatsgirl the tide has turned and I see victory in the distance. Those of you who have fought this war too you'll know exactly what i'm speaking of.
Those of you who haven't will just have to read the signs and figure it out for yourself. Sensei is the only one who answered the question last
chapter. If you haven't read her first story His heart and the only one who can save him, you should and if you have you should look at her sequel
You are everything to me. And yall should know i'm going to pick up her story Hell hath no fury. Yall can still answer the question in but you won't
get a recommentation only a mention in the next chapter. I really miss writing and hope to keep my updates more frequent. Though I refuse to
update unless i get atleast two reviews from people other than sensei ( Sammy-Sama). The more reviews i get the sooner I post and the sooner
you get to hear my corny morals. R&R! Morals: don't get in an arguement with your mother on a subject you know nothing about / don't be ignorant
with your mother/ listen to your elders because even though they seem stupid to you they aren't/ without wood a fire dies down, without gossip a
quarrel does.