Crazy trouble with love part 9
Shirou x Taira no Kagekiyo
Series: Fate Stay
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-Earth, Japan, Fuyuki City, Emiya Residence-
"Ugh." Taiga groaned while currently up at four in the morning, waiting for Shirou to wake up for his 'job'. "Shirou! Wake up, your job at the station is in two hours!"
"Zzzzzzz." Shirou snored while currently on the couch, half naked except for his boxers, revealing a set of abs in the process. "Zzzzz."
"Shirou! Get your butt up!"
"Zzzzz." he snored while Taiga frowned and jumped on his stomach, hard. "GAH!"
"WAKE UP! GAO!"
"OW!" he let out before tossing her off him as he sat up and groaned in pain. "Taiga! What the hell!?"
"You were going to be late." she frowned while Shirou looked at the nearby clock and paled. "Now get yourself ready for that police job of yours."
"I told you before, I'm not a policeman, I'm a Private Mage Investigator!"
"Still a policeman in my eyes, even with that magic of yours, now get dressed!"
"You could have woken me up without jumping on me."
"You sleep like a rock."
"No I don't." he frowned before running into the bathroom to get showered.
"Yes you do!" she called out while rolling her eyes as she went to the kitchen.
(Later)
Shirou grumbled while putting on his clothes, which consisted of a black business suit, black pants and a red tie, and tried to walk out of the house, without his shoes.
"Shirou! You forgot your shoes!"
"Oh right!" He yelled before grabbing his shoes.
"And your badge." She deadpanned while grabbing a black leather badge holder from the nearby table and threw it at Shirou.
"Thanks!" He caught it and bolted out of there.
Taiga sighed. "Working as a policeman at his age? Seriously, I thought he would have a normal part time job."
(Later)
Shirou grumbled as he went on patrol in the suburbs, the chief telling him that it would 'help him get some experience'.
The problem? He was already experienced due to hunting criminal mages like the Matou's in his first two years. Especially when he discovered that the head of the Matou's was a child abuser of the highest order...needless to say he got the police involved and was able to relocate the children to a foster home for the moment.
But now he was stuck doing normal patrols due to lack of crime going in around the area.
'Maybe I should've let that bastard go?' He thought with a sigh as he thought of how Sakura was being sheltered by Rin, a friend of his and a contact for the mage community. 'Still, at least that worm bastard had a heart attack and brought the worms in Sakura's body with him. Heh, going to the Root my ass, old age got to you first.'
As he walked down the nearby alleyway, he noticed that someone left a weird artifact stabled to a concrete wall. That being a single long strand of purple obi rope.
"What's this doing here?" He muttered while inspecting it, noticing it was stapled by high grade iron staples, possibly from a construction site. "Why in the hell would someone just leave this stapled to a wall?"
That was when he decided to take the rope as evidence of public vandalism.
He pulled out an evidence bag before slipping globes on and tried to carefully slide it out.
The problem was that it was stuck to the concrete wall pretty tightly.
"Oh come on." He grumbled while trying again, with the same result as before.
"Man, these are in there deep."
And like that, he tried and tried again until-
SNAP!
BAM!
"GAH!" Shirou cried out as one of the staples snapped off at the speed of a bullet and grazed him on the right side of his face, sending blood right onto the purple robe and contaminating it. "OW! Fuck!"
As the blood seeped into the rope, Shirou didn't realize that the entire ground underneath him was a large summoning circle, crude yet could summon a Servant of low or high caliber, and was glowing purple in response to the blood.
"Could this day get any worse?"
ZAP!
He looked down and saw the summoning circle, causing him to jump back as the rope vanished in a purple cloud of smoke. 'Shit, first the Matrou's, then that fucking priest, then this!'
The cloud slowly dissipated as a tall pale skinned woman with long black hair with two short bang going down her left and right shoulders and a long side ponytail going down to her right knee that was held in place by a cone shaped bun wrapped with a single black band, thin purple marks above her eyebrows, purple eyeliner, dark purple eyes with a ring of light orange, red and a single light green iris, purple lipstick, a C cup chest and small ass, wearing a purple high neck collar that was lined with a gold thread, a single red tasseled rope attached to the middle of the collar, a tall black tate-eboshi hat with a long curved metal strand going from the top of the hat to the base of the neck, three pointed gold ornaments that stuck out to the right from behind the bun, thick golden bamboo shoulder guards that went to her upper elbows and were wrapped with red string in the middle, two red curved plates overlapping the shoulder guards yet were also being overlapped by the collar's outer shoulder plates, red flaming breast plates that protected the sides of the breasts and left the cleavage exposed along with the lower neck, sides and stomach, dark purple gold lined arm guards that went down from the shoulder guards to her fingers, red pointed armor over the upper portion of the hands, purple rope attached to her back that looped around her shoulders before dangling down past her hips, a long purple obi that was attached to the back and was tired in a bow, a black set of panties with gold going up the sides, a long black band going over the waist and held together a red haidate with red tassels near the front and back, thick golden bamboo kusazuri on the sides of the hips, two long purple katanas on the hips in between the kusazuri with a golden hilt, tip and bottom, dark purple leggings that were lined with gold and went up to the lower thighs, dark purple suneate and kogake with gold lining that covered the knees and the upper ankles, high black geta with red lining near the base and tip of the foot, and a single white fox-like mask with small ears, black eyes and red markings tied to the left side of her head by a white cloth, appeared and stood right next to Shirou.
"...interesting." she said while looking at her hands and flexted them a little. "Ascended yet retaining aspects of the past, whoever summoned me was a Genji fool."
"Freeze!"
She blinked while seeing a boy pulling out a strange semi crossed shaped weapon at her face. "Oh? Are you trying to intimidate me, Genji?"
"I don't know who you are but hands where I can see them!"
She raised an eyebrow while her mind was in flux, one part of her fused body wanting to kill the boy and the other reawakening too soon due to the nature of the summoning circle, but she placed her hands on the hilts of her blades and smirked. "Genji, you are a fool. Challenging me to a duel."
"I won't say it again! Put your hands up!" Shirou frowned as the woman quickly pulled out her katanas and cut the pistol into ribbons.
"Genji, prepare for death." she frowned before slashing at him, only for the blades to be blocked by the same two katanas that appeared in Shirou's hands from a flash of blue energy. "Oh?" 'So he copied Azamaru? How strong...for a Genji.'
"I warned you!" Shirou yelled before pushing the katanas away from his body and saw the woman smirking at him.
"I will enjoy taking your head, Genji scum!" she grinned before attacking him with frightening speeds, making Shioru unable to see where exactly she was going to hit next.
'This isn't going to end well for me...wait. If that was a Servant.' he quickly looked at his right hand and saw a dark red Command Seal in the shape of a butterfly on the palm. 'Ok, now I know I accidentally activated a Summoning Circle...wait, thirty seven marks? That's more than the average mage!'
SLASH!
CLANG!
Shirou quickly blocked the katana strikes while getting cuts near the cheeks and arms.
"Give up Genji, you face against the strongest clan." she smirked while Shirou felt a little nervous, but decided to use a Command Seal on her.
"By the power of this Command Seal, I order you to stop and explain who you are and why you are attacking your master!" he yelled while the tatoo glowed, the butterfly's central leg vanishing in the process, as the woman instantly froze in place and placed her weapons away.
"...I am Taira no Kagekiyo...no, I am Kuron Hougan Yoshitsume...no I am both." she said while the agitation slowly disappeared and was replaced by semi aggressive docileness. "Class Avenger. All Genji must die, but had I known you were my master I would have not struck for blood, but to test your will."
'That was a close one!' he thought, breathing out heavily and gasping, realizing he held his breath when he thought he was gonna die.
She frowned. "Seeing you makes me sick, yet I sense your conviction to destroy the wicked."
"Um no, I'm a Private Mage Investigator." he said quickly. "I just catch criminals."
"And I kill Genji. They are nothing more than prosperous inhuman monsters that allowed the Taira and their allies to perish at a moment's notice." she added while Shirou felt a little chill down his spine. "We both hunt the wicked, in our own ways, and why not benefit from our shared hate for the Genji?"
"Well the difference is I let the law judge them, that's not my job to go off and commit vigilantism." He frowned while the woman crossed her arms.
"Even still, the Genji and any criminals associated with them are nothing more than cattle for the slaughter." she said while Shirou shivered. "But perhaps you want to temper my grudge? Diluted it to your needs? I would like to see you try that, master."
"Look, if you mean keep you from killing people, then yes, it's my job." Shirou frowned while the woman shrugged.
"We will see, master. We will see." she said while Shirou grumbled.
"Well, my patrol is almost done. So let's get this..." he turned to the circle and the staples in the wall and discovered that they had vanished. "...nevermind. Let's just go."
(Later on)
-Emiya Residence-
Taiga yawned while currently tired from a day of grading tests and resting on the nearby couch like a tired cat. "I deserve a nice little nap."
As she started to close her eyes, she noticed a strange woman with purple lipstick moving towards her and 'glared' at her.
"Genji." she spat out with venom as Shirou walked behind her and bonked her on the head. "Ow!"
"No killing my guardian."
"But she reeks of Genji-"
"Just don't."
"...fine." She grumbled while Taiga paled seeing the woman right in front of her.
'Who is that!?' She thought while her body was stiff and couldn't even more, even when the woman sat on her stomach and began to inspect her katanas. 'Heavy!'
(Some time later)
Taiga grumbled while walking down stairs to the kitchen, knowing Shirou was going to be late for work, again.
Only to discover the mysterious woman rummaging through the fridge in search of something to eat, leaving a mess in her wake.
"No. No. What is this stuff?" she muttered while throwing several bags of lettuce and milk cartons onto the ground, much to Taiga's anger. "This is a strange box, but where are the-"
"Hey!" Taiga yelled as the woman turned to face the now irate teacher. "What the hell are you doing!?"
"Looking for something to eat, what else, Genji?"
"You're wasting food by throwing it on the ground! Clean it up!"
"No." she said while turning back to find something to eat.
"Clean it up!"
"Or what Genji?" She mocked before getting her face kicked by Taiga and then chomped on the head by the woman. "OW! GET OFF ME GENJI SCUM!"
"We don't waste food in this household!" Taiga growled while biting the Servant on the neck, just as Shioru walked in without his boxers but a white shirt covering his groin.
"Yawn. Mo...what the fuck happened!?"
"Get off me Genji!" the Avenger yelled while Taiga took a bite on her ass. "AHH!"
Shirou facepalmed. "Taiga-nee."
"She's wasting food!" Taiga growled before biting the Servant's ass again.
"OW!"
'Why so early in the morning.' "Avenger, just clean up the mess."
"No-OW! Why my ass you Genji-OW!"
"Just do it and she'll stop!"
"OW! Fine! I'll clean it!" she yelled as Taiga got off her, bit her on the neck again, and threw a broom at her.
"Do not leave this room until everything is cleaned, got it?"
"Fine, damn Genji." She grumbled before seeing Taiga leave the room as Shirou shook his head. "What?"
"If you want to live here, stop treating the house like a garbage can."
"..." she grumbled. "Fine master-"
SHATTER!
"AH!" Taiga cried out as Shirou and his Servant ran into the living room where a hooded burglar with a gun in his hands was holding Taiga hostage at gunpoint.
"Shut up! You!" he glared at Shirou. "Give me your money or I'll blow the bitchs' head off!"
"Easy now, no need to do anything rash, just calmly put the gun d-"
BAM!
Shriou paled as a bullet grazed his left cheek and hit the wall next to him.
"I said give me your money!"
"Genji scum." Avenger muttered under her breath while getting ready to cut that man down. "Twisted and full of feces."
"Give me the money now!"
"Ok ok! Just stay calm." Shirou said before seeing Avenger rush towards the thief like a mad dog. "Wait!"
"Prepare to die Genji." she said with sadistic glee before drawing her blades out.
BAM!
Only to get hit in the stomach and fall lifeless on the ground.
"I told you! I-" he said before seeing Shirou tackle him to the ground and threw the gun away as the mage pulled out a gun from out of nowhere.
"Stand down!" Shirou glared while the body of Avenger smirked and began to rise up, the wound healing quickly as a purple miasma leaked from said wound.
"Huh, what a powerful toy." she said while the thief went wide eyed in terror.
"How are you still alive!?"
"My legend dictates that even if the grudge of Kagekiyo burns away, a new one will rise up to strike down the Genji." she said while pointing her katanas at the thief, all the while Taiga was calling the police. "Now master, let me kill this filth."
The burglar gulped before quickly reaching into his pocket and pulled out a gun to fire at the Servant, not realizing he was screwed either way. "Just die!"
BAM!
Avenger blinked while seeing Shirou, who had quickly jumped into the path of the bullet, fall to the ground with a bloody right shoulder as images of her past quickly entered her mind, but the most prominent was loyalty to 'her brother'.
"Damn it-" the burglar tried to say before seeing Avenger jump right towards him and sliced his arms off. "AHH!"
"Genji filth, harm my master and it shall be the end of your short existence." she growled, her eyes glowing purple, then blue for a fraction of a second, before returning to its purple color. 'Yoritomo...brother...no. Kill. Kill. Kill the Genji that hurt my lord!'
"Avenger, no." Shirou got out while getting back up despite the pain to his shoulder. "He's not a threat."
"He has to die."
"He will be locked away, don't kill him."
"...my lord, I will follow your orders." she said while sheathing her katanas away, but kicked the man in the chin with her geta, knocking him out. "Are you ok my lord?"
"Lord? I thought it was master?"
"Yes, but you tried, and failed, to save me the first time. The second time...look, I will be your vassal." she said while getting onto one knee and bowing to the confused mage. "Treat me as you see fit, a blade or a nuisance. For you saved one that survives only for the Genji's destruction, my life in your debt, my lord."
'Wait...that felt sincere. I know she said she was based on one of Japan's greatest warriors but I thought she was all Genji hating. Huh, maybe she is a good person under all that negativity?' he thought before noticing that she was taking off her hat. "Um Avenger?"
"Head pat. My reward."
"Uh...ok." He said before head patting her, which saw her smile at him like a puppy. 'Oh kami...SO CUTE!'
"Shirou, we need to get that wound treated, now." Taiga called out while running back into the room. "And the police are coming."
"Oh um ok." 'This might be addicting, the head patting I mean.'
(A month later)
For the Emiya household, the burglary would be considered a minor setback but for Shirou himself, it would change everything as after getting patched up, the police chief, hearing about Avenger and knowing about magic, decided to put Avenger on Shirou's 'budding Mage Investigation Beueral' as his partner. And needless to say that one little decision led to the city gaining the most brutal yet justice hungry detective ever.
From normal crimes to magic based crimes from the Magi community, Shirou and Avenger would clean up the streets and occasionally stop hard scale attacks, but that happened very rarely. Shirou would be the brains and heart of the duo and Avenger would be the enforcer that would get TOO carried away, which led to more than a few incidents that nearly got them fired more then once.
Overall, the two were close partners and as of right now, were in their office, aka Taiga's classroom as he didn't have the money to buy an apartment or an office, waiting for someone to give them a job.
And...it was SO SLOW!
So slow he was tempted to just skip the day and take a nap.
"My lord." Avenger grumbled while quickly pulling out her katanas in an impatient manner. "Can I at least cut up something?"
"No, and no not Shinji."
"But he reeks of genji treachery!"
"He's my friend and no, don't even sneak out to do that." Shirou deadpanned as Avenger grumbled and pouted a little. 'Although trying to use a Servant, one Rider on me for a Grail War was stupid. Did he forget that I got him out of the clutches of a child abuser? Ugh, at least he's currently in the penitentiary and only leaves for classes...mmm. Maybe I should say hi to Sakura? Rider too, invite them over for some tea?'
That was when the door opened up to reveal Rin, who was slightly confused at Shirou's presence.
"Shirou? What are you doing here?"
"This is my office, I am a Private Mage Investigator." he deadpanned as Rin rolled her eyes.
"No you're a policeman with magic circuits and a Servant with a craving for blood." she said in a sarcastic tone, already knowing about Shirou's job and the fact he has a deadly Avenger class Servant as a partner.
"Why are you here Genji?" Avenger frowned.
"...I kinda lost something important to me." she grumbled while taking a seat at one of the tables. "My pendant, I think someone stole it while I wasn't looking."
"For your Summoning Circle?" Shirou asked while Rin flitched. "I know about the Grail War and I keep telling you I have no wish-"
"My wish is to kill all Genjis." Avenger interrupted as Shirou grumbled.
"Well, maybe Avenger but not me. I have no desire to win the grail so stop trying to keep it a secret from me, the same one that saved your sister." he sighed.
"I know, but I just need help finding it." Rin said with a sigh. "And not because of the summoning, but because it's very valuable to the Tohsaka family. It's kinda a mana battery, if used it can power a city for a year at most."
"Meaning a lot of mages wanting to use it for their crafts." Shirou nodded.
"Genji." Avenger said coldly. "If my lord does help, what will you give him in return?"
"Simple, some of my gemstones."
"And?"
"What do you mean and?"
"My lord is valuable, he isn't worth only a few measly gems."
"Are you trying to bribe me!?"
"Yes." she said flatly as Shirou facepalmed.
"Avenger." he frowned.
She looked away as Shirou sighed.
"We will take the case." he said while Rin's eyes were filled with hope. "But where did you last see this pendant?"
"Somewhere in the bad part of town. Closest to the shopping district." Rin said before pointing to Avenger. "And please don't make it a full blown destruction fest, I really don't want to be the one paying for the damages again."
"We will try."
"My lord, shall we leave this Genji to her business and locate the pendant?"
"Yeah, the sooner we start the better." He said while they walked out of the 'office'.
(Later)
-Mount Miyama, Shopping District-
"Ugh." Avenger grumbled while walking next to Shirou, making sure he was protected as she was a little irritated. "My lord, please just let me cut something up."
"No."
"Ugh, so boring!"
"It's part of the job." Shirou said while looking around for any sign of a pendant or any suspicious individuals, but found nothing. 'How hard is it to find a pendant?'
Avenger gumbled. "I should be lopping off heads right now."
"Do that and no head pats."
"You wouldn't dare."
"Do you want to try me?" Shirou glared while Avenger looked away. "I thought so."
Avenger raised an eyebrow as she saw a man, looking rather fancy in his business suit, walking down an alleyway with a suspicious look in his movements. "My lord."
"What now?"
"I smell a Genji, and this one is acting like a kitsune." she pointed to the alleyway. "He went that way."
"Then we have our lead." Shirou said while they quickly tailed the man in secret.
(Later)
The mysterious man looked around, feeling like he was being watched, as he opened a door leading to a three building apartment complex near the old meat packing district. 'Soon my plans will be complete.'
As he looked around, he didn't notice the law-abiding mage and his Servant carefully hiding from the man's line of sight, weapons at the ready just in case a fight occurs.
"Think it's only one?"
"Possibly." Avenger said. "I do not smell any other Genjis except this one."
"I see, but let's go in. But try not to head in blind."
"You wound me, my lord. I would never do that."
"You literally do that every time we do busts like this."
"Regardless, let's end him." she muttered darkly while grabbing one of her swords.
Shirou sighed before pulling out his pistol and carefully moved to the door, opening it with a hard kick as the two moved up the stairs and towards the man, who had just closed the nestest apartment door shut. "Avenger, get ready."
"I am always ready, my lord." she smirked before Shirou kicked the door down and pointed his gun into the room, which seemed to be covered in blue prints of different sizes, several magical artifacts and Rin's pendant, being placed on a very crude Summoning Circle in the center of the room.
"Freeze!"
"Shit!"
"Give up the pendant and put your hands up!"
"I will not! The Tohsakas will fall and this pendant will summon a Servant that can make that happen!" he yelled while pulling out a gold knife. "Stay back or I wi-"
SLASH!
He blinked before seeing his knife arm was cut clean off as Avenger placed him into a scissor lock with her katanas. "A-"
"Genji scum, you should've listened to my lord's advice."
"AHHHHHHHH!" The man screamed as Shirou took the pendant and kept his pistol at the man's face.
"Now, normally I would turn you over to the police." he said while moving towards one of the blueprints, which was revealed to be a flawed yet still accurate recreation of the legendary spear Gae Bulg, and frowned. "But after looking at your very crude designs, I recalled a little bit of gossip. That someone from the Clock Tower stole and possibly forged a few artifacts and their blueprints to sell for the highest bitter. Mostly countries that crave warfare and that makes you a terrorist, my friend and I really enjoy killing them."
"W-Wait! I can't die like this!" the man yelled for his life. "D-Don't kill me!"
"I won't, but Avenger? No, she'll kill you." he said before looking at the Servant. "Give me his head."
SWISH!
And cue the man's body slumping down to the ground, headless as Avenger saw the head land at her feet and kicked it a little like a ball.
"Scum." she said before spitting at the head. "Weak genji scum."
'Yep...still not used to killing, even when I try to steel myself for it!' "Avenger, guard the door while I take the blueprints and the like and Trace them."
"Fine, my lord." she said with a coy smirk as Shirou began to rummage through the fallen mage's belongings. "Say my lord."
"What?"
"We have been together for a while now, are we really master and servant or lord and wife?" she asked with a light blush on her face.
He blushed and turned to her in shock. "A-Avenger!?"
"Well? Are we?"
"W-W-Where did that topic come up?" he asked in shock.
"From the tiger, she's been asking if you are smitten with me, which is weak Genji talk...unless my lord has such feelings for a weapon such as myself?"
'What is she on about!? All I thought about her was the fact that she LOOKS like a scantily clad cosplayer half the time!' he thought while noticing her body fidgeting a little. 'Wait...does SHE like me!?' he gulped. "Uh...hey, why don't we finish up here and take a lunch break? My treat."
"...sure." she said while internally groaning at his thick headedness. "As you wish my lord."
Shirou nodded while turning around, feeling his face turn red as he slowly thought about Avanger's love for him, which terrified him and interested him, mostly terrified him since she IS a killing machine that he BARELY controls on a normal day. 'She's so fucked up sometimes...but why do I feel like I'm into crazy girls!?'
'Oh my lord.' she thought with a chuckle as she walked out of the apartment. 'One day you will realize my affections, until then...'
Click.
She pulled out her blades as she saw a robber moving right towards the complex, making her grin with satisfaction. "DEATH TO THE GENJI!"
"Huh, wha-AHHH!" The robber screamed as Shirou heard the scream and ran out to see the Servant cutting the man down with her katanas.
"NO! NO KILLING!"
She turned and smirked at him while holding the head of the robber in her right hand. "Head pats?"
"NO!"
"AW!" She pouted as the screen went black.
(Later on)
"Cough! Cough!" Shirou groaned while currently in his bed, sick with a nasty fever, gained when he and Avenger stopped an armed purse thief in the middle of a thunderstorm. "Cough cough!"
"Jeez Shirou, sounds like you're coming down with something." remarked Taiga. "Might need to call in sick today."
"Cough." He groaned while trying to open his eyes, and failed. "Ta..iga..nee."
"You're skipping today, in bed you go." She said while Avenger sat at the end of his bed, looking a little worried.
"My lord? Do you require anything of me?"
"Ugh…." He groaned.
"Just keep an eye on him." Taiga said calmly. "I still have students to teach so I can't take care of him."
"I see." she said while Taiga walked away.
"Try not to have any sex while I'm gone." she said while Shirou groaned in defiance.
"Not...fun...ugh…" he groaned as Avenger looked at her lord with concern.
'What should I do? All I know is killing, not healing.' she thought while Shirou carefully opened his eyes and looked at her.
"...I trust you Avenger." he said while she blushed and felt a little more nervous than before.
"W-Well with me here, you will be safe from any Genji." she said before getting up. "I shall...make you something to eat."
"T...Thanks." he said with a smile.
She blushed while walking away.
(In the kitchen)
"Ok." she said while tying a pink apron over her body that read 'Kiss the Cook' on it. "Time to cook for my lord...but what SHOULD I cook for him?"
As she looked at the kitchen, she recalled that rice gruel was a good meal for sickness...but also disgusting as well.
"No, my lord will be angry if I made that." she rubbed her chin. "He needs something actually tasty."
That was when she got a great idea.
"That's it! Miso soup, that will be easy." She smirked before looking at the oven and sweatdropped. "But this oven...I don't know how to use it."
That was when she heard a ringing at the door and ran to the front door, opening it to reveal Rin right in front of her with some flowers in her hands.
"Genji?" She frowned. "What are you doing here Genji? Another mission, if so no. My lord is sick and I will not let a Genji assassinate my lord in his weakened state!"
"Woah! Calm down, I'm here to check up on him...and is that an apron?"
"Yes, now leave." She frowned with overprotectiveness.
"Easy, I came by to see him and got him some flowers to help him feel better." She frowned as Avenger glared.
"He doesn't-"
"Are you cooking for him by chance?" She asked while Avenger turned pink in the face and looked away. "You are!"
"...what of it?"
"I can help. I'm not as great as my sister but I'm capable in the kitchen...as long as it's nothing too modern." 'Or complicated!'
"..."
"It's better than letting the house burn down." deadpanned Rin.
"...fine, but if you try anything to my lord, I will kill you." she said while moving aside to let the mage into the house. "That includes seducing him."
Rin blushed while pointed at the Servant. "I-I don't like him LIKE that!"
"Don't believe you, Genji."
"Just use my name! It's Rin!" she frowned.
"The day I do that is the day I let the Genji survive." she frowned. "So, you are a Genji, a weak and cowardly Genji that destroyed the Taira like ants."
Rin groaned in frustration. "Let's just cook...and what are you trying to cook anyway?"
"Miso soup." she said while Rin noticed she said it in a loving tone. "To help him regain his strength and give me head pats."
"Alright, that's a simple dish." Rin said while walking into the kitchen. 'She must really enjoy head pats.'
(Later)
Avenger smirked while looking at the boiling pot of miso soup on the oven, her hands slightly burned as Rin was trying to stop the raging fire that was occurring on said oven. "Perfect, and the house isn't destroyed."
"Not after you nearly BURNED the house down by stabbing the oven!"
"It was too slow."
"That was the proper cooking time!"
"...oh." She said with a sheepish look on her face. "Still, it worked out in the end, so no problem."
"You are so scatterbrained!" Rin yelled while using a fire extinguisher to douse the fire, allowing Avenger to take the pot and place it on the nearby table.
"Mmmm." she hummed before pulling out some salt and pepper and began to pour the contents into the pot. "Just a little more of this and...all done-ACHOO! Sniff, done."
Rin sneezed while seeing the Servant's actions. "No no no! Don't add that! You're ruining the flavor!"
"Eh?" she said while cocking her head to the side. "But my lord might need it."
"Not in large quantities!" Rin yelled as Avenger pouted.
"But more means more flavor."
"Not for a sick person! What are you, a child?!"
"No." She huffed while looking away and began to put shredded cheese into the pot.
"Not that!"
"Eh?! Make up your mind Genji!" she yelled before one of her sword hilts knocked the pot over and spilled the contents on the ground, horrifying the woman in the process. "NO! Not the lord's soup!"
"Damn it!"
Avenger pouted while looking very disappointed. "My lord...he's going to hate me."
"No he won't. It was an accident."
"...but I wanted to make him well." she said sadly as Rin blinked at her tone and body language. "But now he's going to hate me for ruining his meal."
"Shirou isn't the kind to hate someone over a spilled meal." Rin said while putting a hand on the Servant's right shoulder. "He will forgive you."
"...still, I was the one that made the meal, he will be upset."
"He won't." Rin sighed. "Look, let's get this cleaned up and I'll help make a new batch, without the cheese."
"..."
"I'm sure he'll love it."
Avenger nodded while getting up, looking rather peppy and almost childish in nature. "Very well Genji scum, let's make a meal worthy of my lord's head pats!"
'So that's what she wants….she really loves head pats.' Rin sweatdropped.
(Later on)
Shirou coughed while unable to move at all, his eyes closed and his body as warm as an oven. 'I feel like I'm dying….is this what everyone feels when their time comes?'
As he groaned in pain, he felt like his mind was wandering, to things he could've done better, like his career and the fact he let his job over take his relationships with his family and friends.
"Cough...yeah. Maybe I should take days off from the investigator business...if I survive that is." He muttered while hearing the door opening. "Who's that?"
"My lord, I bring you a meal and a Genji scum."
"It's Rin."
"As I said, Genji scum!"
"Oh, hey…" he greeted weakly.
Rin looked at the sick Shirou and was about to move over to him until Avenger walked over to the bed and placed the bowl of miso soup near his face.
"Shall I feed you, my lord?" she asked in a very mature yet caring tone that made Shirou do a slow spit take in surprise. "Easy! It's still hot."
"Sorry...I...didn't expect you to..."
"To what?"
"...care."
"What? I do care for you!" she huffed. "You are my lord, I would never let anything hurt you, not even the Genji scum standing near me."
Rin facepalmed. "Rin! Rin! R-I-N! It's not that hard!"
Avenger ignored her before smiling at Shirou, who opened his eyes to see the beautiful smile on her face. "My lord, shall I help feed you?"
'...beautiful.' he thought as his heart skipped a beat.
"Say ah." she said while moving the spoon near his mouth.
Rin sweatdropped at this. 'For fuck sake...they act like newlyweds!'
'Am I seeing things?' he thought before opening his mouth. "Ah."
Avenger smiled while putting the spoon in his mouth, an aura of flowers forming over them as Rin noticed that Taiga, who had just arrived home, was video taping them with a grin.
'So much blackmail material.' she thought while Rin facepalmed at her antics.
'Of course she would do something like that.' Rin thought before walking over and started to push her out of the room. "Oh no you don't!"
"Hey!"
"Leave them alone, they need the privacy!"
"But the video-"
"Leave them be!" the mage yelled while closing the door behind them, leaving the two 'lovers' alone to act 'lovey dovey' all they want.
"Oh come on!"
"Delete any pictures you took, right now."
"No!" Taiga yelled before running away, causing Rin to run after her.
"Stop being a child!" Rin yelled while feeling like her chances with Shirou were dashed but not broken yet. 'One day Emiya...one day.'
(Later on)
Avenger smiled while currently putting a blanket on Shirou's body, to give him extra warmth. "There you go my lord. Is there anything you need from me?"
"Yeah, it's really helping, thanks." he smiled in gratitude.
She smiled while Shirou saw her moving towards his face and started to rub his head. "Anything for my lord."
"Could you...not do that?" He lightly blushed.
"Why? You pat my head all the time, you deserve some too."
"Well...it's different." he admitted while seeing Avenger's chest right near his face, making him blush. 'Large.'
Avenger kept on rubbing his head while Shirou looked at her long side ponytail and moved his hand over to rub it, making her flinch. "M-My lord!?"
"Soft."
"N-N-Not there~" she gasped.
Shirou, still tired from the fever, kept on rubbing her ponytail, not realizing that it was making Avenger blush wildly and caused her to become extremely flustered. "So soft."
"M-My lord, s-stop!" She stuttered while unable to cope with this sort of affection at all.
"Soooooft." He said while Avenger felt her face blushing even redder than normal.
"M-M-M-My lord! Stop!" She stuttered before quickly pulling her ponytail away.
"Aw...no more soft hair." He pouted while he started to fall asleep again.
She looked down with a blush, lightly touching her ponytail. '...does he like it? I mean my hair isn't that perfect….right?'
(Later)
Shirou blushed red as he woke up, slowly realizing that he just made Avenger embarrassed by touching her very soft hair, like a creep. He covered his head with his pillow, feeling mortified. 'Why?! Why did I do that?!'
As he tried to comprehend all of this, he slowly realized something….he saw the Genji hating Avenger act like a wife to him. And well...somehow that surprised him for obvious reasons.
'She's probably getting her weapons ready to gut me like a fish for doing that.' He thought before noticing Avenger walk into the room.
But to his shock, she wasn't upset at all...but she was currently bringing in some miso soup on a tray while wearing a pink apron.
"My lord, dinner." She said with a rather cute smile.
"Um...thank you." he said while a little stunned about her attire. "Um...what are you doing?"
"Taking care of you, isn't it obvious?" she asked while raising an eyebrow at the boy. "I even wore this apron for you."
"I mean, why the apron?"
"Oh that." she said while playing with her own ponytail and blushing lightly. "I...I wanted to play the role of...wife. I mean we are Servant and Master, Lord and Weapon. It's only natural to play a different role...once in a while."
And cue him doing a spit take as he felt his face turn bright red at Avenger's words. "W-W-W-W-Wife?"
"...it wasn't like I wanted to….but you seem to enjoy my presence, despite my tendencies to kill any Genji that exists." she admitted. "Plus you, my lord, are confident in my ability...so...why not think of me as more than a sword against the Genji?"
Shirou blushed while feeling like she was trying to propose to him.
"J-Just enjoy the soup and tell me if you need anything!" she blushed while seemingly embarrassed about the entire thing.
"O-Oh right!" he blushed while taking the soup, not noticing that Taiga, who had just returned home, was video taping their 'lovey dovey time' with a video recorder.
'Cute!' she grinned. 'I'm making a copy of this for later.'
But that was cut short when Taiga saw Avenger glaring at her from the other end of the recorder, looking kinda pissed.
"Genji. Scum." she growled while pulling out her blades. "HAND ME THAT DEVICE!"
"EEP! I-Ignore me! Just go back to flirting with Shirou!" she gulped before seeing the blades pointed at her neck.
"Give. Me. The. Device. NOW!"
"Shirou! Control your wife!"
"S-She isn't my wife!"
"Yet." Taiga smirked before running away, Avenger following right behind her.
"GET BACK HERE GENJI SCUM!" she yelled in embarrassment and anger as Shirou felt like he just saw another side to Avenger...and Taiga ruined the moment.
"Note to self, next time I make dinner, leave Taiga a small portion." he muttered while the screen went black.
XXXXXXXXXXXX
END