Chapter Four

Olivia was beyond nervous as she sat at home. As soon as she left the SVU that morning, she went over to her doctor's to see if she was really pregnant. She had a strong feeling that she was. She was beyond late, and she had not been feeling at her best lately.

On the other hand, if she was not pregnant, she did not even want to know what was wrong.

No, she scolded herself. There is only one explanation.

The anticipation was killing her. The results from her blood test should be back by this point. Her doctor promised she would call as soon as she knew. Olivia kept staring intently at her phone. It had not rung all afternoon. It was now well into the night. The phone still had not rung.

Olivia frowned slightly as she picked it up. There was a dial tone. Her phone was not off the hook. Why hadn't he called her back yet? What was so important with his other patients that could not wait until morning?

She frowned. She did not want to go there either. All she could do was sit and stare at her phone. She picked it up carefully and examined it. The ringer was on as loud as it could possibly be. There was no way she could have missed the call. Even if perchance she had, she would have seen that there was a message waiting for her, and she had not seen that.

"What is with all of this?" she asked in annoyance.

The phone rang. It was a shrill, loud ringing sound, and it scared Olivia half to death. She jumped up quickly before regaining her composure enough to answer it. "Benson."

"Are you ok?" The voice did not belong to her doctor. It was feminine and familiar, but it was not her doctor. It was Casey, and while she would normally enjoy talking to the other woman, this was different.

Wait a minute, she thought. Casey's calling here, and she's and asking how I am. "What do you know?" she asked suspiciously. "Did Elliot say anything to you?"

"No," Casey began in confusion. "I didn't see him at all today. I just talked to Munch about a different case, and he mentioned that you came in for like ten minutes, but then you left again. I'm just concerned, Olivia. Are you ok?"

Olivia sighed heavily as she slumped back in a chair at her kitchen table. "No," she grumbled. She did not know what else to say. She wanted to have official confirmation before discussing it with anyone else, but she had to talk to someone about it or she would go insane.

"Is this about the rape?" Casey asked softly. Although her voice was soft, the concern was unmistakable. "You know he's behind bars now."

"I know," Olivia said quickly. "I know," she added in a quieter tone. "He is, but his damage isn't."

Casey frowned slightly. "What do you mean?" she asked inquisitively.

"Before I tell you, I want you to promise that you won't tell anyone else. I mean, right now the only other people who know are Elliot and Cragen."

"Know what?" Casey asked.

Olivia did not hear the ADA's question. "And I'm not even sure if there's something even there. I mean, I'm pretty sure, but I don't have the official results yet."

"Results to what?" Casey interrupted again.

"Promise to keep it secret at least for now?" Olivia asked. She had heard Casey's question, but she would not answer it until she got the answer to her own question. When she decided that the rest of the SVU should know, she wanted to be the person to tell them.

"Keep what a secret?" Casey almost yelled in annoyance. "Olivia, whatever it is, you can tell me. I'm a big girl now. If it means this much to you, I won't tell anyone, but I can't promise to do that if I don't know what it is."

Olivia nodded as she shifted her position slightly. Casey had a point, and Olivia had to tell her now. "I think I'm pregnant, Case," she said. Strangely, that confession was getting a tad bit easier to admit with each person she had to tell.

There was silence on the other line for a moment. It was eerie, but Olivia was used to the silence. She had been listening to it for the past countless hours just waiting for her phone to ring.

"Oh," Casey finally said. "I had no idea."

"Me either," Olivia admitted. "I mean, during the aftermath and trial, I had forgotten about regular life things. It wasn't until I returned to work and saw Elliot's calendar that I even realized I was late. Then it all began making sense."

"How do you feel?"

"Mainly nervous," Olivia admitted. "Beyond nervous, actually. I mean, my doctor is supposed to call with the results, and she hasn't yet."

"Oh," Casey said again. "Well, if you want me to go, so you can wait …"

"That'd be nice," Olivia said. "Not that I don't enjoy talking to you, but…"

"I know," Casey interrupted. "And if you need anything, you know my number. I'm here for you."

"Everyone's been saying that," Olivia pointed out.

"Well, we all care about you," Casey said. "Goodnight, Olivia."

"'Night," Olivia responded as she hung up the phone. She immediately picked it up again to see if she had a message waiting. She did not. It was back to waiting. She kept staring intently at the phone, wishing it would ring. It had to ring soon. She needed those results.

She also needed to eat. She grumbled as she walked over to the refrigerator. It had not been that long ago since she ate dinner, but here she was again looking through the fridge for food. She grabbed a package of baby carrots then closed the fridge. She quickly grabbed some peanut butter and rushed back over to her kitchen table.

Her mouth was full of carrots and peanut butter when the phone finally did ring. She rolled her eyes as she tried to swallow it all down, but it would take a bit more chewing first. The phone would not ring that many times. She quickly grabbed it. "Benson," she said through her muffled mouthful of food. She doubted her name was actually understandable.

"Olivia?" her doctor questioned.

Olivia swallowed again. "Yes, Dr. Thompson, I'm sorry. I had food in my mouth. Are the results in?" she asked.

"Yes, they are, and I have some good news," her doctor began.

Olivia groaned slightly. "If you're going to tell me that you just saved a bunch of money on your car insurance, I'm not in the mood."

"Funny, but no," her doctor commented. "As I said, your results are in. Congratulations, Olivia. You're going to be a mother. I can recommend some OB/GYNs for you unless you had someone in mind."

"Um, no," Olivia said in shock. She knew that she was pregnant. Deep down, she knew, but she still was not ready to accept it. Now she had stone cold proof, and it scared her. She was like her mother. She was supposed to inherit things like eye color and weird talents from her mother. The ability to get raped and impregnated was not something she would like to have. "But could you call back and leave those names on my machine?" Olivia asked.

"Of course," her doctor said. "Congratulations again."

"Yea, right," Olivia muttered after she hung up. She was still in shock. She glanced down at her stomach. There was a person growing inside of her. She was carrying a child. "Oh god," she said as she could feel the warm tears rushing to her eyes. She reached for the phone again and began dialing before her doctor called. That way she would not have to hear the ringing. It would go straight to voice mail.

Olivia quickly dialed Elliot's number. Her heart was pounding.

Elliot answered after the second ring. "Stabler."

"Elliot, it's positive," Olivia choked out.

Elliot gasped. He knew this was a possibility, but he had no idea what Olivia was going through. Whatever it was, he did not want her to be alone. "I'll be right over," he promised.