DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the fruits basket characters…sigh, if only I did!

Chapter Three

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Hatori smiled lightly to himself as he began to clear away the remains of his dinner with Mayu. Despite the 'interesting' content of the soup, Mayu had polished her plates with all the determination of an olympic runner.

But then, that was Mayu, he recalled. Always focused, always driven. If there was something she set out to do, she would damn well do it.

Even if that meant choking down some seriously spicy miso.

He was suddenly reminded of a time when he, Kana, Shigure and Mayu had eaten out together at a well known sushi bar. Despite Shigure's not-so-subtly attempts to 'check out' the group of high school girls at the adjacent table, it had been rather a pleasant evening. He and Kana had been together then, and Mayu had just started dating Shigure. The combination had always intrigued Hatori. He was quite certain that Mayu wasn't really all that interested in Shigure (Shigure, of course was interested in anything in a skirt, so that wasn't hard to understand!) yet even still, the two of them would accompany Hatori and Mayu rather frequently. Their double dates had been the source of much amusement – particularly for Kana.

He imagined that was probably why Mayu had dated Shigure; for Kana's sake. Kana had been so close to Mayu, and had often felt bad that in devoting her time to Hatori, she was also neglecting her best fiend just a little. When Mayu began to date Shigure, it eased Kana's conscience considerably, even if she did admit to finding the pair a little baffling!

Hatori smiled again. Mayu was sweet like that, putting up with Shigure's – and indeed his own company – so as not to upset Kana. Kana had always thought so highly of Mayu, and he understood why. She was a good friend.

Only then did it strike him for the first time; she was his friend.

Had he ever had a friend outside of the family? Not unless you counted Kana. A little taken back, Hatori made his way upstairs. As he began to undress for bed, the reality began to set in a little deeper. Mayu was indeed the only person beyond the family who really…knew him. At least, he mused, as well as he would ever permit anyone to know him.

But then again, did she know him? He frowned a little as he lay between the sheets. No, not really – he concluded – not like Shigure or Ayame. Truthfully, even young Tohru-kun probably knew him better. So why did he feel so at ease with her? Why was it so natural to be in her company? Why, even after so long, did it feel so…right to have had her there, in his home –at his table. In his thoughts…

Hatori shook his head as though to shake free of his thoughts. He must have had too much sake at dinner. What was he thinking? Mayu had simply turned up out of concern for an old friend. He had invited her to say out of courtesy. It had been pleasant. Ok, actually- it had been exactly what he needed, but that didn't change the facts.

When all was said and done, despite their history (a history, he reminded himself, that had mainly revolved around Kana) Mayu still didn't really know him. Not fundamentally, not in the way Kana had known him, for instance. After all, Kana had known him as no one in the world knew him. She had accepted his heart and his mind, even as she struggled to understand them sometimes. She had loved him without condition, even knowing his deepest and darkest secrets. That was how close they had been, how well they had known each other.

But Mayu did not know him that way, not by a long shot. She knew nothing of his curse. She knew nothing of the pain he had endured long before he and Kana had even met. She was sweet and thoughtful, but truthfully she had no real idea of the man beneath the lab coat. No idea of what his life was truly like, of the curse he carried and the pain he buried within. She was, and always would be, oblivious to the truth behind Hatori Sohma. She didn't know him, she never would. Never could…

So why, he asked himself, was he suddenly wishing she could?

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It was well into the early hours of the morning when Mayu reached the hospital. Her mind was in complete turmoil. She had arrived too late to be allowed to see Kana, though she had begged the staff nurse to make an exception. Hospital policy, she'd been informed, only immediate family permitted outside of visiting hours.

They'd been best friends since childhood, surely that made her immediate family? Damn nurse. All she'd been told was that Kana had endured an electric shock, but had pulled through ok. OK? What the hell was that?

Mayu was no doctor, but she was quite certain that people didn't just 'pull through'

an electric freaking shock. There had to be repercussions, grave ones.

But even Mayu couldn't have guessed how grave…

Having resolved not to set foot outside the hospital until she had seen Kana –alive and well – with her own two eyes, Mayu bought herself a rancid tasting cup of coffee from the vending machine, before grabbing whatever out of date magazine happened to be on the table near by.

She was in for a long wait.

As she began to lean back in her chair, Mayu stared blankly at the pages of her magazine. She hadn't a clue what she was reading about. All her thoughts were on Kana.

The back of her head began to feel hot with guilt as she recalled switching off her phone at Hatori's house. Keiske had been trying to reach her then, with news of Kana, and what had she done? Turned her phone off, and happily choked down red hot miso while trying not to stare adoringly at Hatori, like some love-sick puppy dog.

She hung her head in shame. While she had been having the best night of her life, her own best friend had been struck by tragedy.

Stop it! she ordered herself, mentally. Kana is gong to be fine, she's stable, she;s pulling through. There was no way I could have known what that damn phone call was about, and it would have been rude to answer it anyway. I din't do anything wrong.

But of course, guilt didn't listen to reason. Much like love…

As much as she knew better, Mayu couldn't shake the sickly feeling that she had betrayed her best friend.

But then, she hastingly reminded herself, that was nonsense.

Kana is a happily married woman. She doesn't even remember what happened with Hatori. I had every right to be there tonight. I did nothing wrong.

Mayu threw down the magazine, and knocked back the remaining coffee. She refused to do this. Refused to let herself be consumed by a misplaced guilt for what had happened. It was a destructive way of thinking, and she would not give into it.

And after all, where had that gotten Kana?

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Lying back in her sterile-smelling bed, Kana Mikage stared at the low, tiled ceiling above her. How many times had she been in out of this very hospital room? One hundred times? Maybe more? Yet she'd never noticed the ceiling. She studied it now with an attention and focus that she might have employed when diagnosing an emergency patient. She noted every crack and every ship. She counted the tiles. She counted them again. Anything to occupy her weary mind. Anything to keep at bay the memories that had continued to flood and taunt her.

Memories…ofhim.

She tossed and turned, fisting her hands at her sides. Why? Why now? Why after all this time did she have to finally remember? And oh Lord, how well she remembered…

"Kana, my darling. Forgive me…"

His voice had been soothing. He'd held her close, even as her body racked with sobs. Even then, he'd buried his won pain, to deal with hers…

"Hatori! Hatori, he hurt you! He hurt you…so badly, and it was my fault! It was all my fault! I;m so sorry…"

"It wasn't your fault, my dearest. It was mine. I…had no right, to taint your world with mine…"

She hadn't really heard him at the time. Hadn't understood what he was saying. All she had heard, was the sound of glass breaking…over and over again…in her mind.

"It hurts, Hatori. It hurts…so much, that I hurt you!"

"You didn't hurt me, Kana. You gave me more than I could have ever asked. I love you, I will always love you…"

"It hurts, Hatori…"

"It won't hurt anymore, my love. Not anymore. At least, I will give you…that much…"

She hadn't listened, hadn't understood what was happening. She didn't see his tears fall. All she saw, was blood. His blood.

"Hatori," she had said, "It would have been better if I had never met you…"

Not even Akito had caused him as much pain as had Kana's final words...they broke his heart, as surely as they froze it. Still, he held on, determined not to break. Not until after he had granted her peace.

He placed his hands either side of her head. Even as his fingers trembled, he closed his eyes, and willed her to find peace. Find happiness…find love…even if it wasn't with him.

And then, it was done.

The tears streamed endlessly now, as Kana fought back the sobs that gathered in her throat. He had robbed her, of her most precious memories – that he might free her of the most painful ones. He had walked away, that she might know love and happiness again, even if it broke his heart to know of it. His heart would carry the burden, so that hers would know peace at last. Wasn't that exactly like the Hatori she had known and loved? Selfless to a fault?

She sighed, so deeply it almost hurt. There were too many memories, too many questions. Yet now, all she could think about was of how much she had loved him. How it had tore her very soul to see him suffer at her fault. How much it had hurt, to know her weakness had brought him such pain.

Yes, Kana had loved Hatori Sohma with all her heart. And she knew he had loved her too, more than anything. He had told her once, that she was like the spring to him. That he would love her always, no matter what. And now, there was one question that burned in her mind, forcing all others far into the background…

Did he love her still? Or had the winter come once more?

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