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The chapter is dedicated with a HUGE thanks to American Mione who came up with the hysterical idea of calling Mitch "Asparagus Boy." Thank you so much.

Deep laughter rang throughout the hospital wing, bouncing off its too white walls.

Poppy sighed, shacking her head as she continued her inventory of the potions in her office. She rubbed her eyes tiredly, mumbling, "These boys will be the end of me."

Poppy had been working at Hogwarts for the last six years. The first four had been as an intern under Madame Noyes, a strict, harsh woman of 60, who wouldn't stand for any nonsense. When Dumbledore offered her the nursing position after Madame Noyes retired, she had eagerly accepted. At moments like this, she wondered why.

A loud crash echoed from the area of the hospital beds and she heard the familiar sound of Sirius saying, "Oops." She closed her eyes and counted to ten.

Poppy stopped at the mirror in her office and ran a hand through her short black hair. Although she was only 30 years old, she was surprised to see that her dark hair wasn't peppered with gray, thanks to James and Sirius.

She had long ago given up trying to control the four boys that now occupied the hospital wing, quickly learning in their first year that they were, at best, uncontrollable. In the beginning, she tired to treat these four as regular patients, allowing no visitors and demanding they rest. She, however, quickly learned that it was pointless and did much more damage than good. The boys would always return to their injured friend, always hidden under an invisibility cloak and usually with food from the kitchens or new idea for a prank. She had come to realize that it was for the best if she just let them stay, even if it meant they were skipping Transfiguration and keeping up her patient.

She knew these boys like the back of her own hand; she had mended their bones, bandaged their scrapes, stitched their cuts, and treated their illnesses. Hell, she'd even removed a chicken's beak from the back of Sirius' head. She'd seen their faults and she new their strengths. They were incredibly loyal to each other and anyone they cared about and they wore their hearts on their sleeves.

That's why she couldn't, for the life of her, understand how they had made the entire school think they hated each other. These four boys were attached at the hip, completely inseparable. If one was admitted, the other three were sure to follow. And as if that weren't enough evidence to prove that they were the infamous Marauders, then the hundreds of times they had come to her to fix a spell gone wrong would be. The boys were creative to say the least. Peter had once come in sneezing goldfish. Goldfish, for God's sake!

She loved these boys to death, but it was her duty to inform Professor Dumbledore of their after hours activities. She'd felt horrible when she had first come to her decision, but realized it was the right thing to do. These boys were not only breaking school rules, but they were putting themselves, and occasionally others, in danger. When she had hinted to Dumbledore that she believe James, Sirius, Peter, and Remus to be the pranksters that made up the Marauders, he had only given her a small, secret smile. "Boys will be Boys, Poppy," he said, his eyes twinkling merrily, "Let them have their fun, for laughter may be very rare in the future," and with that he had ended the conversation. That was the last time she had brought it up. If it was all right with Dumbledore, then it was more than all right with her. And she agreed with him, dark things were rising, and the school could use all the laughter it could get.

The sound of a short shout and a loud bang came through the closed door of her office. She cringed at the thought of what they had broken, and made a silent prayer that it wasn't a body part. She glanced out of the window of her office to find James sprawled out on the floor while Sirius laughed from his bed. Remus and Peter had paused in their game of Wizarding Chess to watch James try to pick himself off the floor. She rolled her eyes and went back to work with the though, 'Yep, these boys will be the end of me,' running through her mind.

The door to the hospital wing creaked slowly open as James and Peter's invisible heads peaked in, eyes quickly searching for Madame Pomfrey or other unwanted occupants of the hospital wing. Deciding the cost was clear, they quickly made their way to their friends' beds, throwing off the invisibility cloak. Remus and Sirius had stopped their conversation as soon as the door opened, sitting up and facing away form each other, giving the impression that they couldn't stand the sight of each other, just in case it wasn't Peter or James who entered.

Sirius had given Remus, not only a busted and swollen lip, but a cut left eyebrow. The werewolf's damaged eyebrow had been magically healed, but Poppy had refrained from fixing his bloody lip, making him hold a pack of ice to it. Remus had a sneaking suspicion that this wasn't because she couldn't fix it, but because she was trying to teach him a lesson for fighting.

Remus was proud to say that Sirius was in a much worse condition than himself. He had not one, but two black eyes and a bloody nose. The black eyes were easily fixed with a charm, but a nasty smelling green potion was needed to stop the blood flowing from Sirius nose.

James took a seat on the edge of Sirius' bed, while Peter did the same on Remus'.

With a smirk, James said, "We come baring gifts," and proceed to empty his pockets of the food he had stolen form the kitchen and Peter pulled a Wizarding Chess set out from under his cloak.

"Oh, thank God," Sirius said with genuine relief, immediately grabbing a sandwich that the house elves had made and taking a huge bite out of it, "I thought I was going to have to actually eat this horrible hospital food."

James picked up two sandwiches and tossed one each to Remus and Peter. Peter, who quickly opened his, began inhaling his sandwich.

With a roll of his eyes, Remus began to set up the chess set, as James said with mock anger, "I can't believe you would think I would leave you to the horror that is hospital food. I thought you knew me better than that," he finished, a shocked hand flying to his chest and a deep sigh escaping his lips.

Sirius picked up his pillow and through it at the teenager at the foot of his bed. James expertly ducked the flying object and watched in horror as it flew across the room and hit a vase of flowers, knocking it to the ground.

"Oops," Sirius said, cringing.

The four boys froze, not even breathing, hoping Madame Pomfrey wouldn't hear them. Praying she didn't hear the crash. They waited, listening for the tiniest hint that she heard and was coming to reprimand them. After a few moments, James began to laugh and the other three quickly joined in. The laughter quickly became hysterical.

James wiped tears from his eyes, as the laughter finally died down. His dark brown hair was as wild as ever, and he smiled as he brushed as strand out of his eyes. Peter was clutching his stomach, a giggle still escaping his lips every few seconds. A small grin was still present of Remus face and Sirius eyes' danced in happiness.

James took a bite out of a chocolate chip cookie he had stolen from the kitchens and turned to Remus and Sirius, "So, how are you guys feeling?" he questioned.

"I'm doing all right," Remus said pulling away the ice pack to show James and Peter his busted lip. Although the werewolf still looked tired, his skin was quickly regaining its color and his eyes were, once again, filled with laughter. His swollen lip seemed to only enhance his rugged handsomeness.

"Ouch," Peter said sympathetically as he moved one of his pawns across the chess board.

"I'm fine now, but I had to drink a truly vile potion," Sirius said, wrinkling his nose at the memory of it, "From now on, there is no punching Sirius in the nose."

"But it's so funny," Remus said, an evil twinkle entering his eyes, "It makes you scream like a girl."

Sirius, who had just taken a bite of a biscuit, spit a mouth full of crumbs all over his bed in indignation, "What?"

"You screamed," pause, "like a girl," Remus stated again, his voice flat and simple, as if he were stating the date of the last battle of the Goblin Revolution.

"I did not, and have not ever in my entire life, screamed like a girl," Sirius said calmly and slowly, his anger hidden barely under his controlled voice. His ocean blue eyes held a glint of danger that Remus was all too familiar with. The werewolf watched as Sirius' jaw clenched in anger, a clear sign that he was about to lose his temper.

"No, I'm going to have to agree with Remus on this one," James said with a smirk, "your scream was definitely on the girlie side."

"I may have, at one point or another, grunted in pain, but I never screamed and I definitely didn't scream like a girl."

"Nope," Peter joined in, "you screamed like a little girlie-girl."

"Wha- No I did not- I..." Sirius sputtered as he sat up, his voice no longer calm and controlled.

"No, you did," James said laughing deeply along with Peter and Remus, "Remus punched you in your nose and you screamed. It sounded something like this," the brunette grabbed his face with both hand and in a voice so high pitched Remus thought it was going to shatter the glass screamed, "ahhhhhhhh."

Sirius, not even waiting for him to finish shoved him completely off the bed. James shrill scream changed into a gruff short shout as he flew of the edge of the bed. He landed with a hard bang on the wooden floor of the hospital wing, skidding a few feet, his robes tangling around his legs. James sat up and rubbed his back while Sirius joined Remus and Peter in their laughter.

After a moment, James joined in too, as he pulled himself off of the floor. The fall to the floor had destroyed any sort of order there was to James hair, which now shot out in ever direction. His goofy grin was once again present on his face. Peter huge smile brought out the dimples in his chubby cheeks and his giggling, complete with snorts, made the other three boys laugh all the harder.

As James sat himself back down of the foot of the bed, the laughter slowly calmed down until it disappeared.

Sirius asked in triumph, "So, you admit that I never once screamed like a girl?"

"Oh, no," James said with a smirk, "There was definite screamage, 'Ahhh," James said again imitating Sirius in a high pitched voice, "Please Mr. Remus, don't hurt me. I'm just a meek and feeble girl."

"I'll show you meek and feeble," Sirius said as he lunged towards James, arms outstretched for his best friend's throat.

"Mr. Black," came a strong voice from the back room, "Put your butt back in that bed this instant."

Sirius grumpily sat back down, muttering beneath his breath, "I swear to God, that woman has eyes in the back of her head."

With an apologetic smile towards Sirius, Remus turned serious, "All right, down to business. We need ideas for our next prank."

"Oh, I have a definite target in mind," James said, an evil smirk appearing on his face.

"Really, let me guess," Sirius said happily, "Is it a Slytherin?"

"Nope."

"Really?" Sirius said, loosing some of his excitement, but gaining curiosity, "Then who is it?"

"His name is Mitch Harding," James explained.

"Harding..." Sirius repeated, the name striking a cord, "He plays Quidditch for Ravenclaw, right?"

"Yeah," Remus agreed.

"I remember him; guy's a real prat, right? Knocked our seeker right off his broom last year?" Sirius said.

"Oh, yeah," Peter said, "I forgot about that."

"So why do we want to prank him?" Remus asked, suspicious of James' intentions.

"Well, I don't really want to," James admitted with a sigh, "But it gave me a nice warm and fuzzy feeling thinking about it." James ran a hand through his messy black hair, a grin stretching across his face as he imagined all the possible pranks that they could pull on 'Asparagus Boy' as he so kindly referred to him now.

"Why?" Sirius asked, his voice obviously questioning James' sanity.

James quickly told the Marauders about Mitch and Lily, his grin only reappearing when he told them what Lily had called him.

"That's my girl," Sirius said with a grin.

"Too bad we can't prank him," Remus said with a frown.

"We'll just have to settle for kicking his ass when we play him in Quidditch," Sirius' comment earning an enthusiastic 'yeah' from both Peter and Remus.

"Remind me again why we can't prank him?" Peter asked confused.

"Because he really hasn't done anything wrong," Remus said.

"But more importantly, if Lily ever found out, she'd kill us," Sirius added. Remus laughed as he watched Sirius grimace, imagining what Lily would do to him.

"Well, we still need our next victim," Peter pointed out.

Remus cringed as he watched an evil grin spread across James handsome face. The werewolf recognized the gleam in his eyes. It was the same gleam that was present whenever James had a genius, or moronic, depending upon how you looked at it, idea.

"What?" Sirius questioned, his voice filled with excitement and curiosity as he recognized the look on James face.

"I have the perfect candidate," James said simply.

"Who?" all three boys asked at once.

"Me."

Before the boys could respond to the shocking answer, the warning spell James had cast on the hospital door went off. A bright blinking blue light appeared over the door. Someone was approaching the hospital wing. The light lasted for five seconds and then disappeared, leaving no trace that it had ever existed. Peter and James quickly dove underneath the invisibility cloak as Sirius and Remus shoved food and a chess set under their blankets. They then turned away from each other, again pretending that they couldn't stand the sight of one another. After four years of experience, the four boys had this routine down to a number of seconds.

Justin Lindley, a Hufflepuff first year, came limping slowly through the door. Madame Pomfrey rushed out to help him to the bed and James and Peter slipped out of the still open hospital door, unnoticed.

TBC

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