Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing, or Harry Potter. Duh!

That was Bloody Brilliant
By Ryoko Porter

Part Two
"Okay someone explain to me where the hell we are!" Wufei barked. He had been seething since he had woken up to have a short, bushy-haired girl standing over him. She had done nothing wrong, or to provoke him, but it was her presence that bothered him.

"We're at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. The year is nineteen, ninety-five—which sucks cause Kurt Cobain is already dead, meaning I can't stalk him! Almost a hundred years before the first mobile suit was ever designed." Duo stated for the twentieth time. It seemed that none of his comrades wanted to believe where they were. Yet he too found it hard to ponder. Hogwarts wasn't supposed to be real. It was all just a book series called Harry Potter in their world. Yeah it had been written around the century they were in, but it had always been just reading source for kids. He had heard that it had gone in and out of popularity. Even movies had been made, but for some reason they had all disappeared after the first Gundam war. Yet here they were. And after explaining it all to his friends, they too saw the complete strangeness of their situation.

"Maxwell, I never thought you'd be the type to know your literacy history." Wufei had prompted. But Duo had just shrugged it off.

"Yeah well, when you talk as much as me… it helps if you have an endless supply of otherwise useless information."

"So what are we going to do now?" Quatre had worriedly squeaked. "What about the war back home? How are we going to get back? And if we can't, then what are we going to do here?"

"We will remain here, close to the spot where we appeared in this world. It may be our only chance of getting back. If we cannot return we shall decide later on our actions." Heero said calmly.

"Ah it'll be nice not having to fight the war for a time. Just think, we may even be able to retire from the soldier business earlier than we thought! And not be dead!" Duo said in a sort of trance. He was imagining what he would do first in their Oz imposed vacation.

"But Duo, what about all the people we've left behind? The ones who counted on us?" Quatre whined.

"Quatre no one counted on us at home. We were just the small band that seemed to only wreak havoc on everything. No one counted on us, because they didn't know what we were doing. Okay so their lives may suck from now on, but there's nothing we can do about that here. I say we follow Heero's plan, and if we can get back so be it. But if we can't, well then that's okay too. I think we should enjoy this blessing. We're in a world of innocents. Dude we are in paradise!" Duo grinned at the end of his little speech. Then in a sudden look of deep thought he seemed to have an inspiration. "About the biggest problem I can think of, is that we maybe muggles, and that would mean we'd have to find somewhere else to stay."

"That won't be a problem Mr. Maxwell." A gentle male voice came from behind them. When the pilots turned they were greeted with the vision of an old man who seemed to have an air of both innocents and sorrow. His long beard covered most of the front of his body. But he wore long purple robes and a tall hat upon his head. His eyes glittered with wisdom and a kind of childishness. "I am Albus Dumbledore, the headmaster of Hogwarts. I have made arrangements for you five to stay here and study along with the other students. I and the staff will try our best to make you feel at home, but you must understand that in our world things may work a little differently. If by chance, you remain here until you turn eighteen, we are prepared to help you all get settled into an independent life. But now because of your age, you will have to stay here all year long. The governments here are very strict about such things. When you are ready we will help you to get jobs. But now it is time for you to learn how to use the powers handed down to you through the generations."

"What powers?" Trowa finally spoke.

"Why the magic that you hold in yourselves of course! You are wizards, which if I may say… is a good thing. If you were muggles, we would have some troubles." Chuckled the old man. Duo immediately envisioned him as a thin Santa Claus.

"Okay wait! Before we go any further, let me ask something." Wufei sighed as he pinched the bridge of his nose. "What is a muggle?"

"A non-magical person." Duo explained quickly. Wufei then huffed again and turned to Heero.

"Oh you know he's going to have a head-start, reading all the books." He harshly whispered. Then raising his voice so everyone could hear, he took his turn at Duo. "Oh and here I thought we were all adults!"

"Not in this world! Besides Wu-fuzz, when have you ever actually thought I was an adult?" Duo grinned and he rubbed the Chinese boy's head, making his hair look even weirder than normal.
"Okay so we have to stand in front of countless students and faculty, just to put on a hat?" Wufei once again yelled. The whole experience seemed to piss him off. But as he breathed heavily in an almost blind rage, he was interrupted by Heero's smooth voice.

"One-thousand, three-hundred, and twenty-eight students." He stated as if obvious, as the others just stared at him in a semi-shock.

"Okay, now it's official. J really fucked you up!" Duo snorted in frustration. Yet as soon as the five were called into the dining room, all intimate emotions were forgotten. The place was amazing. It was far better than any colony atmosphere, and the pure emotional emotion that radiated from everyone was exciting. As they made their way up to the head table, the stares and smiles of the students warmed their hearts and scared them. They had been terrorists, trained not to be seen. Finally at the head of the room they stood, ready to begin with the Sorting Ceremony.

"Ladies and Gentlemen!" Dumbledore called for the attention of the school. "I'm sure all of you have heard the rumor that some unexpected visitors have appeared. And I'm going to confirm it tonight. Though where they came from is unimportant, I want to make it clear that they are unused to our customs and will need patients. Because of their age, they will be joining the fifth year class. However inexperienced they will be taking beginner courses to catch up. Please help them in anyway that you can. Now for the Sorting! Professor McGonagall." He passed the stage to the harsh looking woman that had a slight air of kindness. She placed the stool on the floor, and a torn hat upon it.

"It's my bloody break! Once a year I was promised." The hat grumbled as it suddenly came to life.

"When I call your name, please just come and sit down." Ordered the woman, to the boys. "Barton, Trowa." She said loud enough for the whole school to hear the name. Trowa sat on the small stool, as he was fitted with the living hat.

"Ah yes, let's see. Memories hidden away, and a courage surpassing many I have seen. And a willingness to do what it takes. But the house that calls to me is… RAVENCLAW!" the hat proudly announced. As Trowa got up, he was directed to the table that sat his new roommates. The group graciously welcomed him, as his joined them. And it surprised Duo to see Trowa even shake the hands of a couple of the boys.

"Chang, Wufei." McGonagall called out. Wufei shook his head in slight disgust, but he took his place on the stool just as Trowa had.

"Such devotion to honor and justice. This is an easy one… HUFFLEPUFF!" the hat again announced. Quatre giggled as Trowa and Heero smirked, and Duo outright laughed. Wufei looked like his head was going to explode. It was one thing to be sorted into houses with names like Gryffindor or Ravenclaw, but Hufflepuff? True he didn't know anything about this place, but kind of 'WEAK-ASS' name was Hufflepuff? Oh the dishonor! But he too left the stool and sat at the table he was pointed to. He wasn't greeted as warmly as Trowa, but the others could see that the other students agreed with the crappy state of their house name.

"Maxwell, Duo." And in traditional Maxwell fashion, Duo bounced up to the stool and grinned. But as soon as the hat touched his head, it seemed to cringe. It curled up it's damaged rim, and seemed to shrink.

"Such pain… I am sorry." The hat whispered to Duo. Then after straightening itself back up and it made it's announcement. "SLYTHERIN!" Duo then took off the hat and handed it back to the professor. But he grinned at the strange thing, and spoke gently.

"Don't worry, Quatre's next. His life is like sainthood compared to mine." he then went to sit at the table decorated with green. He quickly made friends with the group, not minding the glares he received from other tables, mainly Gryffindor.

"They always glare at us." Sneered an almost white-haired boy. He was thin and had a kind of subtle elegance. He opened his hand to Duo, who took it, and introduced himself. "Draco Malfoy."

"Cool name." Duo grinned. "I run, I hide, but I never tell a lie!" he added before trouble started.

"Winner, Quatre." Quatre gently sat onto the stool and smiled as the hat was placed on his own head.

"Oh a challenge!" the hat seemed to grin. "Such bravery, yet not the will to do anything it takes. But the devotion, and the wisdom!" then the hat seemed to look over at Trowa, unnoticed by many. "It will have to be… RAVENCLAW!" the hat said proudly. Quatre's smile got even bigger as he thanked the hat and joined Trowa. Quatre was greeted as kindly as Trowa had been, but he leaned more on Trowa as he gathered the names of everyone at the table.

"Yuy, Heero." The whole school stopped to watch Heero sit. His natural air of mystery seduced their young eyes to him. His face was neutral, focused on everything that was happening around him. Then he felt the light touch of the dirty old hat to his head.

"GRYFFINDOR!" the hat instantly announced. The whole Gryffindor immediately applauded as Heero made his way over to them.

"Cool! I was starting to think we wouldn't get anybody here!" chimed George.

"Bloody brilliant." Ron grumbled. He was still miffed about how Heero had treated him earlier. But all became forgotten when the food appeared. Mountains of mashed-potatoes, and beef Wellington. Soups of every kind. Vegetables that the pilots had never tasted. Oh and so many pies and cakes for dessert.

It was a half-an-hour though when Duo stood from his place at the Slytherin table and made his way over to Gryffindor's. With a candy toothpick in his mouth, he rested his arm on Heero's head to support his weight. Then leaning down so his face was beside the stock boy's he grinned.

"Hey Hee-chan! Can we talk after dinner? In private?" he asked. For a moment Heero just considered Duo through the corner of his eye, then silently nodded. At this Duo's grin widened as he stood back up straight. "Cool, thanks buddy!" Duo then looked at Fred Weasley, who was eyeing him suspiciously. "Hey! Duo Maxwell at your service!" he said as he held out his had for Fred to shake.

After the exchange of greetings Duo left the table, walking back to his own. But Fred had found a small piece of paper in his hand, which he found to have a note from Duo: 'Barrowed an exploding cap, make it up to you later.'

Then without anymore warning, a loud pop sounded from the Hufflepuff table. But it was quickly answered with "MAXWELL!" and laughing from everyone in the hall, as the longhaired boy was chased down by a food covered Wufei.

"Oh score! NO KATANA!" Duo cackled manically.

End Part 2.

Duo would be such the Kurt Cobain fan!

Ryoko Porter