Always Thought

Always thought tears were stupid,
for they always dry.
Always thought the stupid ones,
were those who could often cry.

I always thought the faint at heart,
were those who shed a tear.
And I always believed the weak,
were the ones to admit fear.

And now behind this mask,
the walls are coming in.
I'm breathing, hard, swimming fast.
Crawling in my own skin.

I'm admitting how afraid I am.
Within myself to drown.
I'm allowing my pain to simply show.
In place of my usual frown.

I'm scared, I cry.
Then am shocked.
I'm finding that I really care,
behind the door, locked.

But now that I know what I can do,
I'm running far too slow.
As blackness comes over one last time,
You'll never, ever know.