Hello everyone, this was a request made by a long time friend called Killjoy3000, and thought I'd give it a shot. I created a new OC who was recently hired. I don't want to give too much away about this character, but I just wanted to see if I can make this. If its good enough, and people like it I will continue with this as well.
A large city with a bright burning red sky as the sound of cars honking rang loudly. A male figure could be seen looking at a flyer of a "Help Wanted" ad as he looked up a building with black and white stripped horns. He went up the elevator reaching a certain floor when he spotted the door he was searching for that said "IMP Headquarters", and a piece of paper taped to the door that read, "Meeting in Progress".
The figure looked at the wanted ad once again to double check, and didn't notice any other doors with the same monogram as the door in front of him. He took a deep breath to calm his nerves as he reached over to knock on the door.
Knock Knock
"WHAT?! CAN'T YOU READ?!" answered a jester like imp with large wide hands, a narrow head with curved black and white horns, pointed feet with a boot-like heels, black lines running down his eyelids, yellow sclera that seem to give off a faint glow in the shadows with his red iris eyes, a black heart-shaped skull symbol on his forehead, and white splotches covering his right eye against his crimson skin. He was wearing a torn black collared coat with red buttons, black boots, and large black fingerless gloves with eye like orbs that looked like they had a cross shape iris on them. The figure could also see a red skull shape bolo tie around his neck questioning his appearance over all.
"H-Hi, I'm here about the job-"
"You're hired! Come on in!" yelled the imp happily, catching him off-guard as he dragged him inside.
He suddenly found himself seated in a large conference room with grey walls, a long white table, and a whiteboard with a graph showing various decreasing figures, and a large sign in red saying "FIX THIS SHIT!" on it. He looked around the room to notice four other figures in the room. There were two other smaller imps sitting opposite of him, a male and a female, and next to him was a female hellhound.
The second male imp also had red skin with yellow sclera and small black slit pupils. He had white pointy hair that led up to curvy up right S-shaped black and white horns with a long red tail that ended in a sharp arrow waving angrily behind him. He had on a navy black coat with a red button, white cuffs, white shirt that ends with a black turtleneck, fingerless gloves, and a large red bow tie.
The female imp also had red skin with yellow sclera and small black slit pupils like the second male imp. She had a long tail with an arrow tip slightly waving behind her. She had small white markings on her arm and near the tip of her tail. She also had long black eyelashes the extended pass her face, and beyond her messy short greyish-black hair with a bang covering her right horn. She had two black horns with thin white stripes on the top of her head, a beauty mark on her left cheek, and a small gap in her teeth as she politely waved at the newcomer. She had on black lipstick with a simple black choker, a cold-shoulder black crop top with gold buttons where the straps at the top meet the torso piece, torn black pants, fingerless black gloves, and black footwear. She also had a small black heart-shaped tattoo on her left shoulder.
"What just happened?"
"Should've run when you had the chance dude. Welcome to the fuck show", said the hellhound in a bored tone while looking at her phone.
The female hellhound has a dog-like muzzle with sharp and pointy teeth and a dark grey nose, red sclera with white irises, white fur with grey patches on her shoulders, a big bushy tail and voluminous grey hair swept to the side to reveal her ear. Her outfit features a black choker that has white spikes, a grey crop top has strings shaped like an inverted pentagram to hold it up, fingerless gloves, and shorts with a crescent moon cut on the right side. She was also wearing a black toeless stockings and is barefoot, due to her digitigrade stance since her feet were up against the table. The newcomer could also see that she has two piercings in her left ear while her right ear was slightly torn.
"Sir, what is-"
"Not now Moxxie, I have a few things to say", said the first imp as he paced around with his tail waving behind him, "Alright, now I know business has been a bit slow lately, yes. It's no one's fault, okay? I'm not naming any names here-Moxxie", said the imp looking at the second imp named Moxxie while he gave him a confused and accusing look at his boss.
"Now does anyone have any bright ideas on how we can get business drumming up again?"
"What about a car wash?" said the female imp.
"This is Hell, Millie. No one cares about cars being cleaned here, okay? Ooh, What about a billboard?"
"We can't afford a billboard, sir", said Moxxie rolling his eyes.
"Helpful, Moxxie. Really glad you're in the room right now", said the imp pushing Moxxie away, "See, unlike you, I did something progressive and hired a new guy. Say hello to…whatever his name is", said the imp.
"U-Um Hi, my name is Zakarain Galedata, but you can just call me Zak. Wait, if you guys are broke, then why hire me? Why even bother putting up these 'Help Wanted' signs?" asked the newcomer named Zak.
"We still have those up? I thought everyone threw them in the garbage by now", said Moxxie shocking the newcomer.
"What kind of demon are you?" asked the female imp named Millie excitedly.
"Millie!" said Moxxie.
"What? I'm just curious. I'm sure you'd do the same if you saw someone weird, or poke them with a stick if it was something weird", said Millie.
Moxxie was about to say something when he thought about it, "Touché."
Chuckle "Yeah, I can see why my appearance might be a bit strange", said Zak scratching his cheek.
He had light blue-grey skin with dark yellow sclera, red iris, and long slit pupils. He had messy grey-black hair making it appear as if he got out of bed recently with two bangs framing his sides, pointy ears hidden under his hair, and was just slightly taller than their boss. He had on a black leather jacket with a grey fluff collar, black fingerless gloves with a metal band on the back of his hand, steel-tipped boots with straps going up his leg, two belt straps on his right and one on his left. Unlike the other demons in the room, he didn't have any horns, but he did have a long skinny black tail waving behind him.
"I know I don't look like it, but I'm an incubus hybrid. My mother is a succubus, but I'm not quite sure what kind of demon my father was. All I had was my mother to raise me", said Zak smiling.
"Daddy issues much?" commented the hellhound typing on her phone when she looked at him, "At least he's not bad looking I guess."
The hellhound reached over to his crotch making his eyes widen in shock as she felt up his cock and balls. The hellhound's eyes widen in shock at what she was feeling was bigger and longer than her arms, "Oh fuck."
"C-Can you p-please let go?" muttered Zak making the imps in front of him go wide eye at the hellhound's shocked reaction. The pair then looked over to their boss who was just doodling on the whiteboard until he turned around to his employees.
"Alright enough of this bullshit. Have you guys forgotten what service we provide?" said the boss turning on the TV to show the three imps killing, shooting, decapitating humans with the hellhound occasionally mauling an unsuspecting victim. Everyone in the room was watching the ad with the boss and the hellhound eating popcorn as they watch.
"Ah, those were good time", said the boss.
"Wait, I'm confused. What kind of service is this?" asked a confused Zak watching the amateur slasher flick.
"Glad you ask Jack-"
"Zak", corrected Zak interrupting the boss.
"Mac, whatever", said the boss waving off his correction, "We are a professional murder company that was started by yours truly. The names Blitzo, the 'o' is silent, make sure you remember that, and around here I make all the important business decision."
"What important business decisions?" interrupted Moxxie.
"Shut up Moxxie, I'm training the new guy", said Blitzo.
"What training? You haven't even told us why you hired him", said Moxxie.
"Yeah, I'm kind of wondering that myself", muttered Zak.
"Easy, this big guy is our big meat shield if anything goes wrong if you know what I mean", said Blitzo, "But it's not like anything like that will happen, and Moxxie can finally shut the fuck up about things going wrong."
"Excuse me?!" said Zak and Moxxie at the same time.
"I'm cannon fodder?" asked a shocked Zak with a hurtful expression.
"This is not what I meant by adding safety precautions!" said Moxxie angrily, "And I don't need reminding about what this company represents, sir, considering you blew most of our salaries on an obnoxious TV ad last week! One that you then additionally paid to have run for a full three hours on a channel nobody watches!"
"Uh, hey, excuse me. What's 'obnoxious' about a super-fun jingle, all right? It's a fun distraction when an advertisement's spittin' bullshit!" said Blitzo proudly.
"People love musicals, sir", said Millie.
"Exactly, Millie. And we're basically doing a musical. Are you gonna crush my musical theater dreams like my dad did?" asked Blitzo in a somber tone.
"Uh…" droned out a confused Zak.
"Sir-"
"Cause right now, all I see is just my dad's asshole talking to me! Crushing my dreams of being who I truly am inside", said Blitzo in an overly dramatic way.
"Are you trying to crush his dreams, Moxxie?" asked Millie in a sly tone.
"I…What?" asked a confused Moxxie looking at Millie.
"I thought I knew you", said Millie in a seductive tone with her tail curving upwards.
Zak looked at the interaction between the two noticing a connection between them and sensing genuine lust and love between the two, "Are you two…"
"We're married", said Moxxie with Millie hugging her husband.
"Congratulations, you two make a lovely couple. It's always nice to see genuine love between those who truly care about each other", said Zak smiling making Millie giggle while Moxxie had a small smile rubbing the back of his head, and wrapping his tail around his wife.
"Yeah, yeah, love and bullshit, whatever. I can't believe you, Moxxie after I made you employee of the month!" said Blitzo after holding up a plaque with an ugly picture of Moxxie on it.
"Oof", commented Zak at the ugly picture.
"Okay, sir! I'm sorry, a commercial jingle is not comparable to musical theater. Nobody actually likes the jingles!" said Moxxie rubbing his head in frustration
"I liked it", said Millie genuinely.
"Do not-Do not agree with him in front of me", pleaded Moxxie while pointing a shaking finger at his wife, close to losing his cool.
Blitzo just smiled as he clicked a button on the remote starting the commercial jingle that played last night.
"Hi, there! I'm Blitzo! The "O" is silent, and I'm the founder of I.M.P.! Are you a piece of shit that got yourself sent to hell, or are you an innocent soul who got fucked over by someone else?!", said Blitzo wearing multiple costumes.
"After lovingly killing my wife for fucking a deliveryman, you can imagine my surprise when I wound up here, after the State of Ohio killed me. I really wish I could stick it to that yappy jogger who saw me hiding the body", said a buff demon guy wearing an Ohio sports jersey while Blitzo was in the background holding up a cardboard sign that read 'Some guy who hired us!'
"Well, luckily for you, thanks to our company's special access to the living world, we can help you take care of your unfinished business by taking out anyone who screwed you over-", said Blitzo gesturing towards a grimoire book in his hand while Millie and Moxxie perform a ritual in the background opening a portal where Blitzo falls into it backwards, "-When you were alive!
When you want somebody gone, and you don't want to wait too long?
Call the Immediate Murder Professionals
Hand grenade or cyanide,
We'll make it look like suicide,
The Immediate Murder Professionals
We do our job so well,
Because we come straight up from hell
We'll kill your husband or your wife.
We'll even let you keep the knife
We're the Immediate Murder Profession-
Gunshot
Groan
Hospital
Two nurses quickly rush in the operating room with a small boy in an orange shirt and black pants on a gurney. The doctor rushes over to a station to prep some equipment while the nurses tried to look over the boy that was shot.
"Doctor, he's not responding!" said a curvy feminine nurse with bright pink pair, but spoke in a deep masculine voice.
"Blue water, stat!" ordered a male blue haired nurse as the woman nurse hit the injured boy with a clear IV bag filled with blue liquid.
"It didn't do anything!"
"Damn it! I'm not losing another one!" said the doctor handing both nurses a pair of defibrillators as all three pressed them against the small child.
"Clear!" ordered the Doctor successfully reviving the child as he took in a deep breath, "Holy shit, it actually worked."
Blitzo, Millie, and Moxxie are waiting outside the boy's hospital room waiting for some kind of news. Blitzo was reading a magazine while Millie comforts Moxxie, who looked devastated for missing his supposed target and hitting a child.
The doctor soon comes out of the room with a clipboard flipping through pages not really caring about the strange appearance of the imps, "He appears to be in stable condition, but he'll need surgery. Now what insurance provider do you freaks have?"
"The fuck is insurance?" asked a confused Blitz.
Outside Hospital
Crash
The three imps were suddenly thrown out the window of the hospital as they held on with the unconscious boy strapped in until they were stopped by a rope that became tangled around Blitzo's foot for a few seconds, then snaps plummeting all of them to the ground.
Kids die for free!
"All that was in the commercial? How'd you get the camera in the human hospital room? Or the-"
Shh shh shh shhh "Let's just say I know a guy", said Blitzo shushing Zak confusing the hybrid even more.
"I'd like to go on record and say that incident was Loona's fault. Dispatch is supposed to give us the right info on the target. It's very simple", said Moxxie
Scoff "Sit on a dick, Moxxie", said Loona uninterested.
"You sit! Sit on...a-and the…D-Do your job!" said Moxxie unable to think of a comeback.
"Hey, now we don't blame our screw-ups on Loona, okay? She didn't do anything wrong", said Blitzo affectionately rubbing his cheek against her fur while she growled at him menacingly to make him stop.
"Are you kidding me, sir? She's awful", said Moxxie recounting all the times Loona had
Flashback
Puppy Bark Ringing
"Hello, I.M.P." greeted Loona in a bored tone on the phone while reading a Hellhound Monthly magazine.
"Loona, I got stabbed! Call Mox-"
Clang
Loona instantly hung up after hearing Millie's voice not really caring what was happening.
Flashback
"Happy Adoption Anniversary, Loonie! I got you a little somethin'", said Blitzo holding a small gift box to Loona.
"Is it a cure for syphilis?" asked Loona in a bored tone.
"I...oh..." stammered Blitzo not really knowing how to answer her question.
"Then I don't want it!" yelled Loona grabbing the gift and slamming it down before a large horde of spiders emerged from the box covering her whole body.
Ugh!
"I'm sorry, you love spiders", said Blitzo who was apparently now standing outside the window ledge.
"God dammit", muttered Loona while a spider was hanging from her snout.
Flashback
Loona was watching the TV looking at the Princess of Hell Charlotte "Charlie" Magne singing a musical number she dubbed as "Inside of Every Demon is a Rainbow" on a news station. Moxxie entered the office looking at a piece of paper in his hand with a confused look on his face.
"Um, excuse me, did you just fax me an ad for weight loss?" asked Moxxie holding up the flyer that read 'Chub B. Gone'.
"No", said Loona in a bored tone.
"Wha-Why-why would anyone send me this?" asked a confused Moxxie.
"Come on, you know why", said Loona looking at Moxxie.
Flashback
Loona was in the break room rummaging through the fridge looking for something to eat.
"Whoever left the fucking avocado salad in the fridge, I'm taking it, because I have the worst hangover right now", said Loona taking out a small red container. She quickly discarded the lid and ate the avocado salad at a rapid pace.
"Why would you drink on a work night?" asked a confused Millie entering the break room.
"I'm hungover from this morning, dumbass!" retorted Loona just as Moxxie entered the room.
"Isn't that my lunch?" asked Moxxie noticing the box in Loona's hands.
"You know what? I can't take this assault right now! I need to blow off some fucking steam!" said Loona kicking the box to Moxxie instantly knocking him out of the room.
Outside
Aah!
Wah!
Loona instantly runs up to a demon lady passing by, pushing her baby in a stroller until she kicks the stroller high into the air and storms off shocking the demon lady in disbelief.
Flashback
"Blitz, that clingy rich asshole is on the phone. Says it's urgent and wants to talk to you", called out Loona in a bored tone to her adoptive father figure, "Sounds a little DTF-y", commented the hellhound.
"Oh, God, it was one time! If I hadn't slept with that privileged asshole, none of us would have access to the living world", said Blitzo throwing his water cup to the floor.
"You what?" asked a disbelieving Moxxie.
Blitzo Flashback
A demonic looking owl with black feathers framing his head and face, and white plumage on his face with a black beak, was hooting like an owl with feathers scattered everywhere. Blitzo, who is partially nude, walks away quietly with a large grimoire in his hands.
"Got the book, got the book! Got this fucking heavy book!" sang Blitzo to himself in a hushed tone. He stepped over the balcony of a large mansion, and laid the grimoire over ledge. When he tried to step over, he lost his balance and fell down below, "Oh...oh! Oh shit!"
Oof "Sorry I fucked your husband", said Blitzo to another bird demon who was the owl demon's wife after landing on her table interrupting her social tea time with other nobles.
End Blitzo Flashback
"Blitz!" yelled Loona
"I heard you alrea-"
Blitzo's Office
"So, what can I do you for this time, Stolas?" asked Blitzo playing with a bobble head of Moxxie.
"There's a political candidate causing trouble up on Earth for a few of my associates. He's trying to convince people global warming exists", said the same owl demon that Blitzo step with fluttering his long feathered tail and crossing his avian feet. He was wearing top hat with a regal gold crown on its front, a red tunic with six golden buttons, gray trousers, and a plush burgundy surcoat with a white fur collar and puffed striped sleeves.
"Doesn't it?" asked a confused Blitzo.
"Well, yes, but more people die if nothing is done about it. And it gets lonely here", said Stolas in a small whiny tone.
"Okay, well, yeah, that makes sense", commented an uninterested Blitzo.
"You know what happens when I'm lonely, Blitzy?" asked Stolas in a flirty tone
"Oh, God fucking damnit", groaned out Blitzo with a cringed look pulling the phone away from him.
"When I'm lonely, I become hungry...and when I become hungry, I want to choke on that red **** of yours! **** your ***** and lick all of your ***** before taking out your ***** and **** with more teeth until you're screaming ******** like a fucking baby!"
Blitzo was visibly disturbed as Stolas kept going on about his sexual endeavors with him, and hangs up. He breaks his cellphone in half, smashes it with his desk phone, pulls out a blender, puts the pieces in it until it is pureed into a liquid. He turns and hands the blender to Loona who was standing nearby, "Eat this! And then you know that bridge over the freeway?" asked Blitzo as Loona chugged the blender contents with ease.
Swallow "Yeah?"
"Shit off it!" ordered Blitzo.
End Flashback
Zak's eyes twitched after processing everything he heard, especially on the part on how Blitzo stole a legendary grimoire from the famous Goetia family, and also slept with Stolas Goetia, the crown prince of their side of hell. Like Blitzo, he was also disturbed at how the crown prince actually had a sadistic side, and the preferences on what he wanted to do with Blitzo disturbed him even more, "I…I'm…I…"
"Don't, just…don't. The thought alone is too much even for me", muttered Moxxie to the newcomer.
"Look, the point is Loona's a valued member of our family, and you don't get rid of family", said Blitzo with Loona actually looking up from her phone with a small smile on her snout feeling slightly touched by his words.
"We aren't a family, sir! You are the boss! We are the employees! You treat her like she's some troubled teenager! She's more like a meth-addicted homeless woman you let man the phones!" said Moxxie while Loona kept looking at her phone while sticking out her middle finger to Moxxie.
Chuckle "She's certainly a feisty hellhound isn't she", chuckled Zak making Moxxie's eye twitch at his comment.
"Moxxie, I can't believe you! That is offensive! Without homeless people, I wouldn't have half the joy and laughter I do in this life!" said Blitzo pressing his face against the window with some cracks appearing at the sheer force he was pressing his face against it. Blitzo looked out the window seeing a homeless man holding up a sign asking for money while a female imp ignored him.
"While we're on the subject of 'family', can you stop finding me and Millie outside of work?"
"Come on Sweetie, it's not that big a deal" said Millie sweetly.
"Excuse me, WHAT?!" asked an infuriated Moxxie.
Flashback
Millie and Moxxie were in their apartment with Moxxie preparing their meals with Millie watching her husband with a smile.
"Honey, can you get me the butter?" asked Moxxie cutting up some vegetables.
"Sure, Sweetie", said Millie opening her fridge when she was suddenly surprised when a hand popped out handing her the butter.
"Spoiler alert! The butter's spoiled!" said Blitzo from inside the fridge making Millie giggle at his comment.
"What's funny, Honey?" asked Moxxie hearing his wife giggle.
"Really impressive word play", replied Blitzo proudly at his response.
"What the?! Why are you in our fridge?!" asked a hysterical Moxxie seeing his boss in his fridge.
Later that evening, Moxxie and Millie are asleep in bed while Moxxie was tossing and turning as he heard a loud purring sound that was disturbing his sleep. Moxxie opened his eyes to see Blitzo standing on him staring him right in the eyes.
"Whatcha dreamin' about?" asked Blitzo waving his tail happily while looking down at Moxxie.
"I was dreaming about my parents being murdered. But now, I'd like to go back to that", said Moxxie in a deadpan voice wanting his boss to leave their apartment already.
Another Evening
Of all the imps in hell! It's for her/him that I fell!
Oh, Millie!
The married couple closed their eyes wanting to share a passionate kiss after singing the song that inspired their love when he noticed something in the corner of his eye, "Are you fucking filming us right now?!" yelled Moxxie seeing Blitzo outside their window holding up a camcorder to record them.
End Flashback
"Just! Stop! Doing! That!" slightly growled Moxxie with his eye twitching badly.
"Wow", commented Zak not really knowing what to say anymore.
"And that's just the tame stuff", slightly growled Moxxie again.
"I don't see what the issue is. Is there something you don't want me seeing?" said Blitzo smiling making Moxxie even more angry.
"No!" angrily growled Moxxie gritting his teeth and his eye now twitching uncontrollably.
"You a baby-weiner-haver?" snickered Blitzo with Loona snickering along with him.
"Sir! What you say, and how you act is totally INAPPROPRIATE!" yelled Moxxie angrily
"Calm down, Mox. You're gonna have another panic attack", said Millie placing her hand on his shoulder trying to calm him down.
"I AM CALM!" yelled Moxxie as he starts whimpering in anger while glaring at Blitzo while his wife slowly comforts her husband.
Shh shh "There, there", whispered Millie in a comforting tone rubbing his horns gently.
"Look, I don't judge the boring couple stuff you do outside work hours, so don't judge me!", said Blitzo motioning his hands suggesting sexual activities.
"Oh, I do judge you, sir! Quite a lot actually!" said Moxxie
"Mox, he's our boss!" said Millie.
"No, no, no, it's fine Mills, your husband is just-how do I say this without being offensive...retarded", said Blitzo with a devious smile.
"Does immaturely insulting me make you feel better about your sad, single life?" countered Moxxie angrily.
"It actually does", said Blitzo smiling as he leaned on Moxxie.
"You know, it's been fun, but I think I'll-"
"Oh no you don't big boy! Being half incubus means you certainly got some juicy tales on some of the tails you tapped. Now spill it! Who'd you fuck, and how hot is your mom?!" said Blitzo grabbing Zak by the collar of his jacket and yanked him back to his chair just as he tried to excuse himself out of the meeting room.
"Sir! He's brand new, and you just hired him! The least you can do is wait some time before you ask some offensive questions about his succubus mother, or his sex life like you do with me and Millie!" said Moxxie defending Zak.
"What, Twenty minutes wasn't enough time to ask? Even Stolas' wife reacts faster than that", said Blitzo crossing his hands.
"And the only reason you have a wife is because you're easy to manage unlike some other guys here! At least the new guy really does have a 'big boy' to back up his sex talk", said Loona in a bored tone.
"My husband is not easy to manage, you bitch!" emphasized Millie gesturing two middle fingers to Loona, while the hellhound let out a feral growl at the female imp.
"Do not talk to my receptionist that way! She's sensitive!" said Blitzo defending Loona.
"Yes, I am!" said Loona snapping her jaw at Millie.
"And you! Keep it in your pants and away from my Loonie", said Blitzo to Zak confusing the hybrid as to why he was snapping at him.
"Hey! Stay out of my sex life! If I wanna ride that huge dick, I'm gonna ride it good and hard!" said Loona snapping her jaw at him now making Zak blush at her comment.
"Loona I forbid-"
"You guys are all fucking assholes", interrupted a young voice from the last figure that Zak recognized as the human kid Moxxie shot in the commercial.
"Wait, you're alive?" asked Zak shocked to see a live human in Hell as the human boy was hooked up to a heart monitor.
"Oh shut up, kid. You're lucky to witness this", said Blitzo dismissing what the boy said.
"Yeah, most evil souls are dead to wind up down here", said Zak.
"This company is such a mess!" groaned out Moxxie pinching the bridge where his nose would be if he had one.
"Alright, let's go back to talking about my outfit", said Blitzo confusing his employees except for Loona.
"Nobody was talking about that!" said Loona looking back at her phone.
"Which is why I'm trying to get that ball rolling. So, how does it look? It's good, right?" asked Blitzo eagerly wanting to hear back some feedback about his outfit.
"It's been a literal hell having to pretend to be paralyzed, so you fuck-shits wouldn't kill me! But now, I want that. I want death!" said the kid in a desperate tone after hearing the demons in the room argue about nothing but nonsense.
"You were faking this whole time?" asked a confused Zak making the human boy stare at him with a deadpan expression.
"You are a selfish, greedy clown, and I'm a kid. We're supposed to like clowns, even the creepy ones!" said the kid pointing at Blitzo.
"Hey now, that's not very-"
"If I wanted to hear from a spineless jackass, I'd rip out your spine and ask you some shit", interrupted the kid making Moxxie flinch.
"That's my husband you're talking to!" defended Millie.
Laughs "That's your husband?! I figured you for a slut, but I didn't know you needed dick that bad!" mocked the kid making the married imps glare at the human brat.
"Hey! Look you brat, you can't talk to a lady like that!" said Zak angrily at his rude comment.
"This coming from a gigolo who looked like his mom fucked a rotting corpse, and doesn't know how to use his dick", mocked the kid.
"Watch it brat, you're really crossing the line here", growled Zak with blue sparks being emitted from his hands.
"Ooh, I'm so scared of a pansy boy who couldn't even get properly laid", mocked the kid, "And you!"
"What? What about me?" partially growled Loona already feeling angry at the human kid.
"Nothing, I don't talk to dogs. I'm a cat person", said the kid crossing his arms earning a glare from the hellhound as she went back to her phone.
"Wow. You know, kid, you kind of are a piece of shit", said Blitzo with all his employees agreeing with him.
Guitar Rift Ping
"Oh, fuck! Guys, I just got a text from our client. Guess he was the right target after all", said Loona with a sinister smile.
"Who?" asked Blitzo.
"Him", said Loona pointing to the kid
"Me?" asked a shocked kid.
"Yup", confirmed Loona showing her teeth in a dark smile.
"The human brat?" asked Zak.
"Ooh, Yeah."
"They wanted us to kill an actual child?" asked Blitzo.
"That's what they're sayin'" said Loona happily.
"Well, Christ on a stick, I guess there is a God!" said Blitzo happily as he took out a flintlock pistol and shot the kid forcing Zak to duck as the bullet hit the kid in the heart instantly killing him.
"Guess it's true what they say. You reap what you sow", said Zak slowly getting up as he looked at the dead body.
Before he could say anything the three imps rushed towards the dead kid as the two males started kicking it while Millie just stabbed in the corpse in a fit of rage while Loona recorded everything on her phone.
"Well…at least you gave him a quick death. That was merciful of you...I guess...but do you really need to desecrate the body like that?" asked Zak feeling mixed emotions at the boy's death.
"Yes!" yelled the three imps in anger.
"You heard what the piece of shit kid said! Besides, he was the right target, so we get to have fun with him now!" said Blitzo with a sinister look on his face.
"What did I get myself into?" muttered Zak to himself out loud.
"Should've left when I told you to dude", said Loona recording everything until she reached over yanking on Zak's dick again through his pants, "Well, sort of glad you didn't now. I wanna try that out that huge dick in your pants."
"I-I'm flattered, but I-I don't have condoms o-or anything", stuttered Zak as Loona stroked him.
"Ew, Why would I want you to wear a condom? Just fuck me good and hard, and pump me full as many times as I want. Not my first time riding dick dude, but it will be my first time taking in a huge one like this", said Loona feeling his dick slowly harden as she licked her snout hungrily.
"You know, folks, with this company, I really wanted to prove that we're capable of doing the same things anyone else can! Like killing people! So, from us here at the Immediate Murder Professionals group, we promise to settle your unfinished business or your money...is gone and you're never getting it back and you can write us a bad review, but we'll play dumb to it, because it's hell and no one fucking cares", said Blitzo as he and Moxxie dismembered the boy's body with saws and chainsaws splattering blood everywhere, and stuffed the body and it's parts inside a large black garbage bad making Zak feel slightly uncomfortable at what the imps were doing.
"You know, even though this kid was a target, he's still a child. And it's important that we handle this going forward respectfully", said Blitzo wrapping his tail around the three coworkers as they smiled at his comment.
"Moxxie's right. What you say, and what you do, really are inappropriate", said Zak.
"Aw, thank you Frank-"
"Zak", corrected Zak in a slightly angry tone for still not getting his name right.
"Greg", said Blitzo.
"That doesn't even rhyme!" said Zak when Blitzo pulled him into their hug.
"Whatever, the point is, that we support one another, and deal with each client with the professionalism that is expected of us", said Blitzo smiling, "And don't worry! We'll make sure Moxxie's bullshit doesn't turn you into a pansy wuss like him during your training period", smiled Blitzo making Moxxie grumble at him angirly.
Human World
A male news reporter holds a microphone up to woman crying uncontrollably holding up a badly drawn picture of her son, while the reporter looked bored and disinterested. The headline on screen says "Mom sucks at drawing own kid."
"Please! If anyone has seen my little Eddie, please contact us at-" Uumph
The crying mother was soon interrupted when a large black bag dropped from the sky holding her son's dismembered body. The humans look up to see a portal containing the three imps and their newest member looking down at them.
"You're welcome!" said Blitzo as he waved back at them and closed the portal.
"I-"
"Let's go big boy, I wanna test out that dick now. Do it good, and this could be a regular thing", whispered Loona grabbing Zak pulling him out of the office towards her secret room she kept for herself.