Chapter 50: Interference in the Masquerade

December 2nd. Near Noon.

(Hangar 78.)

[Takeru]

Moving my shoulders for a while as the cockpit opens, Kasumi descends first. Double checking that my helmet is in place, the faint smell of oil and the buzzing of the mechanics greets me once more as I leave the Mindseeker. Soon after, the initially curious whispers burst into bewildered shouts.

"What's with this damage?! The carbonic actuators are almost out of order!" A hoarse, old voice with a thick accent, one that was clearly not from Japan, fumed about.

"Sir, the left hand is completely unresponsive to our checks. We can't even get a reading through the data link," A younger, more panicked voice this time.

"It would seem the boosters' auxiliary arm is also in need of heavy repair, Major Sergeant, sir. Perhaps a complete replacement of the block would be in order," A female voice this time, also foreign, was dismayed at what showed up in her monitor, then took a brief glance towards me and Kasumi as we descended to ground level, "Just what sort of maneuvers did they do to abuse the craft to this extent?"

"The shutters of the boosters are also on the brink of getting stuck for good, and that's saying nothing on the noise the turbine is doing now…" And again, all of the mechanics give us the evil eye, making Kasumi hide behind me, "How the hell did they do something like this in a single battle?"

…Well, to be fair, I fought with all I had. Making multiple double boost jumps by alternating the jet and rocket engines of the jump units, manually setting the angle of the shutter to what I prefer for short but intense bursts of speed, and the constant reposition of the things to veer my angle of flight right after doing one of said full boosts must have done a nasty number on them. And I didn't even do a Gliding Charge or a Sky Rend today, the Mindseeker would have broken down in awesomeness if I had done that.

Well, if he was the Swordbreaker, I'm the TSFbreaker then I guess. I wonder if you also left your machines in tatters? Oh, but I do this because I learned through Valgern-On. Even if his moves were real good, he shouldn't have been as reckless as I am, given that my style is practically madness to everyone else in this world.

…I guess that would work against me if I try to prove who I am to the Guard, even if I try to use the Mugen Kidou as well. Not like they seemed to care much about little me in that memory, anyways.

"Viking 1, everybody is scared of us," She whispers, still using me as a shield from the gazes around us, "Also, really angry."

"It's understandable, it's a one of a kind TSF and I almost sent it to the scrapyard. At least this data will be of use for the Shin, 'cuz if it can't take this much, then I'm gonna to need a Shiranui for sure," Sighing as the whispers continue, along a complain or two once they see yet another damaged section, I keep on slowly pacing to the exit of the place.

"But they might be right. You moved way too fast at times," And she holds the fort behind my back.

"What, you scared too?"

"…Somewhat. Some turns made me a bit dizzy," Not lifting her tone from a whisper, she slows down her pace.

"Hey, why didn't you tell me? You holding up alright?"

"Yes, don't worry. I didn't want to get in your way, and the Valkyries weren't going to give us a breather."

"…Was it when Hayase broke through a building?" Hesitating for a second, she then nods.

Goddammit Hayase… Leave Kasumi out for a sec, I could have bitten my tongue at the sudden intrusion. She didn't sound hostile on the way back, but an elite like her should know better. Hmm… Maybe she isn't used to the Type-00C as of yet? I mean, reckless she might be, but Hayase is no one's fool. Perhaps I'm the first that forced her to use a full boost since she switched models.

"Well, from now on I'll try to be more careful when we pilot together. It might be for the best to start training on our own instead of against others, until you get used to the G-Forces of my stunts, if you wanna keep training with me of course."

She then shrugged her lips, looking unnerved as the grip on my arm got a bit tighter, "I do, so if you find some time, please give some more lessons."

"Got it, but still, we should take our time. I wonder if we can use the Stallions again…"

As we were getting closer to the exit, 2nd Lt. Pyatkh entered and told us to go report to Sensei in person. Thus, we left the echoing chamber full of complains towards the usual elevator. Once we reached Sensei's floor, Kasumi went to her room to change so I made my way to the office, where I found her reading something in her laptop while drinking coffee, again without anything to eat nearby.

"Hey, Sensei. Pleased with the battle?"

"It was truly a surprise, to be comple- What are you doing in the suit?"

"…I mean, I was told to come here immediately, and can't exactly get changed in a normal changing room without someone noticing I left right after the Viking entered, right?"

Sighing a bit too strongly, a rather disappointed glare came at me, "Your clothes are in the cylinder room, weren't you told? Go and get changed then come back."

"Yes, yes…"

Sigh… Why didn't she tell me that? Is she so out of sorts she outright forgot that? Eh, whatever.

Quickly going back to the office after getting into my clothes, leaving my suit in the steel box that was near where my fatigues were waiting for me, I sit in my usual sofa as she passes me a mug and some muffins.

"…So, how did you see everything?"

She chuckles as she sits down, spinning slowly, "Spectacular. I didn't think you'd drive the Mindseeker to its literal limits. Why didn't you ever fight like that until now?"

"Well, during Niigata you explicitly told me not to do something stupid and I was using an unpolished XM3 at the time, and showing off all my cards during training wouldn't have done us any favors in disguising the Viking," She nods, humming as if bored, "And during the development of the XM3 you never placed me against anything that demanded my outright best performance."

"Is that so… If I might ask, what is in your opinion your best performance?"

"Hmm… If I go by numbers alone, it has to be when I offed like a thousand BETA all by myself in-"

"Blurgh!" Without any warning, Sensei spit out her coffee and began coughing real bad.

"H-Hey, you alright?"

Then, she shot me a vicious glare, subduing the coughing fit, "One. Fucking. Thousand. That's what you said, right?" Fuming much, she took off her now drenched in coffee coat, never taking her eyes off me.

"…I mean, yeah? I don't remember the exact number, though. I was more focused on the Fort-Class back then."

Still not leaving me out of her sight, sending a cold shiver down my back, she began to grab some papers that had been splashed by coffee, "Is that so… Then, how many did you kill during that mission?"

"Twenty something, I guess? Again, don't remember the exact number but it was around that. Uh… Sensei?"

Now clutching the papers, bending them real hard to the point I don't think she'll be able to fix 'em, her blazing eyes never leaving mine, she began taking small steps towards me.

"You took down…" One step, narrow eyes, "twenty Forts…" Two steps, tone freezes over, "aaall by yourself…" Three steps, she tilts her back, filling my view, "and you kept quiet about it because…"

"…You never asked?"

…

"Sigh… What else have you not told me then, hmm?" Eyes still blazing, her expression sharpened even more, "You're not gonna tell me you also took down a hive all by yourself now, are you?"

"…I mean, I do remember telling you I did take down a Reactor and a really large number of BETA on the worlds after Babylon. Sure, it's all blurry, but I clearly recall the shine of the reactor and the way to it, in pieces at the least."

And in all this time, those memories haven't cleared up at all. Save for the nightmares of Iceberg, that is.

Then, she remains staring, blinking in quick succession for a moment. As I wondered whether to speak or not, she finally restored my personal space with a quick turn towards her seat. Sigh… What's with her now?

Leaving the crumpled paper on the desk, sitting with a loud thud, she then faced me with quite some fire still in there, "So, this is your limit then?"

"Well… I haven't tried to do a Gliding Charge or a Sky Rend yet, and I was sort of trying to be careful since Kasumi was there. But I did do a serious effort, so yeah, you can say it's close to my best," Finally easing up, I let the coffee help my relaxation.

"Is that so… In any case, your performance was astounding. Taking down four Takemikazuchis, piloted by the Valkyries no less, with a modified Tomcat…" Sighing again, she begins to spin once more.

"Well, to be frank, Kasumi did help a lot with both the first kill and the navigation," Half of the result is hers, after all. No way can I shoot in midair while doing a barrel roll with such precision.

"I see… By the way, do you still feel fine? No headaches, no dizziness, no fogginess," Taking a moment to again stare, seems as if she were scanning me whole.

"No? Sure, I did some reckless stunts back there, but I'm holding up well," Giving her a thumbs up, eating the muffins, I sink into the sofa as I stretch my legs comfortably.

However, she says nothing for a while, still staring.

"…Good enough, then. Even if you left the machine in tatters, the data you produced will be of much use to the Shin project and the XM3. Was Yashiro satisfied in the end?"

"Oh, yeah. She seemed a bit scared of my stunts, though."

Sensei chuckles as she starts spinning again, "I suppose that is to be expected, from the piloting of someone who subdued twenty Fort-Class all by himself."

…She's not gonna let that go now, huh. Why is she so pissed, again?

"So, now that we're done with that…" Now facing me in complete sobriety, she entwined her fingers and rested them on the desk, leaning in, "The Guard tried to pay your cell a visit while you were piloting."

"…I see. And? Did they insist?"

Fuming much, she nods, "Much, very much. Even went as far as requesting official permission, saying they wished to inquire about who you obtained the blade from. I missed the moment when you neutralized Isumi thanks to that," Doing a fast, sharp spin, it does nothing to placate those embers, "By the way, who gave you that blade? They were particularly insistent on that point."

…My world's Meiya.

The one who I couldn't save despite being right there, the one I left alone for two years.

"If it's someone who's dead or missing I could… Shirogane?"

In the end, I wonder how's everything over there? I know going to check is out of the question, but… Did that world get reset after I left? Are they safe back there?

"Ahem…" Looking back up, she held my gaze with a completely solemn expression, "Who gave you the blade again?"

"…Someone we can't use."

"Are you insinuating you don't want to answer?"

"Why do you wanna know? We can't use that person as a shield."

"Your position in Alt. IV as the tuner of the 00 Unit requires your safety to be assured, let me remind you," One brow sinks, her tone does too, "Who gave you the blade?"

"…Sigh. You really wanna know, even if you can't do anything about it?"

For a second, her complexion blazed up again before sobering into the usual bored expression, "Are you, perhaps, holding some reservations towards my influence, Shirogane?"

"I mean, what exactly can you do to use Meiya for this?"

And, she got tilted.

Blinking fast for a second, confusion spreading as she stared right back, until she rebooted.

"You're saying Mitsurugi gave you the blade?"

"Yeah, well, not her exactly, but it was her sword. By the way, Maya-san was the one who gave me the thing, so we can't use that either."

"Is that how it is, huh… Nothing we can do, it's true," Then, why are you still spewing fire? "Well then, I suppose you should at least have a talk with them before they get any weird ideas in their heads. Did you get anything out of yesterday's session in the end?"

"…About that… I don't think… I can go and talk with 'em today."

"…Huh, what do you know. Another thing you didn't tell me about."

"Come on, now. It was… hard, even for Kasumi."

"So, what was it about?"

"Sigh… Did you get any intel on my parents in the end?"

"Do you even have to ask, really?" Very quietly lashing, she picked up some stuff from the piles, throwing them my way, "Both died when he was still young, as you had told me your father was a Royal Guard here, and he perished during Operation Swaraj. Let me tell you one thing, though. Your mother was registered with her single surname, and neither had any intel on their profiles regarding marriage or having a son. Whoever wanted to hide you did a thorough job indeed."

"…Huh."

Didn't knew Mom had health problems, dammit. Why was that not a problem back home? And anyways, why would they have had to live in some rundown town? Mom wasn't from the city, sure, but they had moved together once they started dating. I don't see my grandparents, from Dad's side, letting them live in the sticks. To say they were super chill and welcoming would be an understatement. Maybe this world also changed them somehow?

But… But if anyone went to this length to erase his past…

"So Shirogane, what did you see yesterday, and why do you not want to speak with the Guard now?" Fingers still entwined, gaze unmoving from my shape, she awaited the answer.

"…Remember when I asked you if this was safe and what not?"

"Hm? What has that to do with this?"

"Well, back then I asked you if you were sure that Yuuhi was on good terms with him, remember?"

"…Yes, I recall. And I told you Her Purpleness is most likely fond of this world's you. Did you see anything that disproves this assumption?"

"No, not really. I think she liked him, at least when they were kids."

"So then, what's the issue?"

"…That we never put into question if he was on good terms with her."

…

Stalling a reaction, the sober facade let way for a hawkish glare to flourish, "…What are you talking about? How could he not be on the Shogun's good side? I told you he joined them when he was but a teenager, and all this protection, all this insistence hints that he was, indeed, someone important for them."

"…And what if he despised that?"

"Enough with the questions, start answering. What did you see?"

"…The day when he got the letter of Dad's passing, and how they wanted to send him to an orphanage."

Breathing through clenched teeth, I start telling her of what I saw yesterday, of how I ended up cutting off the recovery as his fear overwhelmed me, and how Kasumi was kind of groggy due to that, which is why we didn't give her a report.

How he was beyond broken at the news, how Maya-san's dad was a dick to him, and how she didn't do anything to stop him. And how it seemed that, after using up Dad, they threw little me away without a single care. Heh, what did I even expect of those dastards, really? Silly me, believing the nobles would treat me fairly.

"It was… It was too much for me, so I practically shut down the projection as I heard his inner thoughts," Sighing as I hunch over, the last drops of coffee fail to clear the raspy taste in me, "And even if it feels different to the sadness of the CCSE, it got me thinking. What if this world's me didn't like Yuuhi?"

"Then, why did he join the Royal Guard?" She presses immediately.

"Well… I dunno, but-"

"Shirogane, if he had been sent to an orphanage, he would have never been able to join the Royal Guard afterwards."

"Bu-"

Not giving me an inch, she takes a mile while leaning onto her desk, "Furthermore, the place you said was your house remained under your father's name through the years, so nobody adopted you."

"They could have changed the databases, though."

"True, however, want to know what we found in it?"

"Huh? You… went to inspect my house? Why?"

"Well, first to see if 'your room' had vanished as you said it had. And yes, it did. However, in the remains of the place we found some… interesting things to be sure," Smirking a bit, she gets up and goes to a steel locker. Taking out a folder, she hands it to me, remaining close as I begin to look at what's inside.

And in the thing were… pictures of my house. Of a ruined version of it, with a different table than the one back home, with less furniture on it.

But there were photos in the walls, in the entrance hall. Photos of my parents, of them with little me and Uncle Koetsu, and… a picture of their room, left intact save for the dust and damage of the war. Even those same dumb orange sheets Mom liked so much… As well as my own room, even with my jet poster and all…

Sighing softly, can't help but to smile as I see the place, "…I see. So it was left in peace…"

"Indeed. If you had been adopted or if it had been sold, your house wouldn't have been left in this state. I assume you can confirm this was your parents' room?"

"Yeah, even that dumb sheet… Yeah, this is my house. Not exactly the same, but it is," Looking up, our gazes meet in silence for a moment, then another, "Why did you keep quiet about this, Yuuko?"

"…I didn't really, this was merely to confirm your room was truly gone, to scan the place for any possible hints about how the transfer worked," The slight veering of her eyes, the faint grumbling in her tone just now tells me she didn't find anything useful there, "And the team only took more pictures of the rest of the place as a protocolar measure. Didn't think it would be of use, to be honest," Shrugging, she rolls her eyes, letting me see she's telling the truth, "So, if your parents' bedroom was left alone despite both of them being dead for almost six years when this area had to be evacuated, then it is obvious this world's you wasn't sent to an orphanage nor adopted."

"Then, the hell happened to him? Did they erase him back then?"

She then stares at me, very dismissively, "A child, really? All of this bother for a toddler?"

"…Okay, that was dumb on my part. But what could have happened?"

"How should I know? You're the one getting memories from him. You're sure he had some manner of animosity towards the Shogun?"

"Towards the Guard. I… to be honest, I don't see how he could have remained on good terms with any of 'em, seeing how they treated him after Dad died. And… I know I tend to get emotional under pressure, even if I try not to. So, well…"

"You're not confident in your ability to convince the Guard of your identity since you could react negatively to their probing, which could then make them believe someone is manipulating you to see them in a bad light?"

"Yeah… save for the second part, I didn't think it that far. You think they might believe someone is influencing me?"

"Not someone, more likely me," Crossing her arms, again she fumes, "I bet you anything you want that they'll blame me for your 'sudden distrust' towards the Guard if they truly believe you're this world's you. And if they don't it's all the worse, since they'd get against both of us and assume I was planning to use you to influence Her Highness. Which means…" Shooting a look at me, the devouring tension returned to her, "You absolutely need to ascertain what happened to him after your father's passing. Shirogane, as soon as Yashiro comes back, you're going to do another memory recovery session."

"Sigh… Got it."

A hand going to her chin, she again began to scan me, "…Why are you hesitating, again? Do I have to remind you of the importance of this matter for Alt. IV, and by extension your wish for a peaceful life?"

"No, I know that… It's just…" Leaning back onto the sofa, gazing at the ceiling, parts of his words as they took him away come back and I can't help but to grimace, "Something… doesn't feel right. I dunno how to put it in words… but part of that sadness was in the CCSE… And, well, I guess we could just use these early memories as proof, without risking me getting negative due to his emotions, right?"

"Don't be an idiot," Ruffling her bangs, she again goes for a spin, "Inherited memories, more so in the case of forced ones, cannot influence someone in any meaningful way in such a short amount of time. This is all on you getting emotional when seeing these flashes," Facing me again, making me recoil under her gaze, her tone again froze hell over, "So, if you wouldn't mind, I'd like you to stop wetting the pillow over someone else's life. Start to take the necessary steps to ensure our plan comes to fruition. You're just gathering intel, and if you're getting emotional over it, it's all on your shoulders."

"H-Hey, you can't… It's not that simple."

"Yes, it is. Stop being such a pansy, are you truly the same man who killed twenty Forts all by himself? The veteran who wants to end large scale wars and reach a peaceful world?" Leaning into her desk, her glare intensifies, another layer of dry ice on her tone, "What can I expect you to do for Alt. IV if this is enough to take you down, Mr. Ace Pilot?"

Feels like I got stabbed multiple times in a row, can't even hold her gaze anymore, "…Just because I'm a good pilot doesn't mean I'm immune to sadness, you know. After what happened in my world… It's not easy seeing him also lose his everything like that…"

Leaving the silence hanging for a sec, the calm but sharp whisper teared right into and through me, "It's on you. If you let someone else's life bring you down, it's your own damn fault. Could you get a grip already? We need to ensure your safety, so that you can remain here without issues. Do I truly have to remind you of what and who we're dealing with here?"

Stealing a gaze at her, I only found more and more fire. As I broke eye contact, I only could hear more and more frustrated groans and a really heavy sigh, followed by a few fast steps towards her seat.

Yeah, I know. This is on me. Yuu… No, Sensei doesn't have to care about my own problems. She doesn't need a crybaby on her team, she needs someone who gets shit done. As Hayase said, don't throw your burdens onto others. If you can't smile when talking about it, if you're just looking to vent… Shut up and keep it inside, deal with it on your own. Your problems are yours, don't go pawning them off on the rest first chance you get.

This is my cross to bear, can't really expect anyone to lend an ear when it comes to the mess of my world… And she doesn't have to understand what I'm going through, she doesn't have to listen. Yeah… Remember it well… She isn't the Yuuko I fell for… She's merely someone I work with, and you don't vent your personal problems while at work.

And to reach my own goals while trying to help this world as much as I can, both for mine and his own reasons, pacifying the Guard is a must.

Now that I got the squad to accept me, I can't let this stop me.

Even if it hurts, even if it only confirms he indeed wasn't in good terms with 'em…

…The ball is on my feet, the dice is on my hands. It's a play I gotta do all on my own. Otherwise, if Sensei doesn't find me useful… She did say she only would keep helping me 'so long as I helped her', so if I fail to meet her expectations…

It's all over for me. As the stranger I am, I can't expect anyone to spare me any sympathy anymore.

This is my own fight.

"Sigh… I get it, I'll make sure to endure the visions."

"Good," She begins spinning once she sits, looking up and back to the poker face, "I'd like to solve this matter today, before the mock battle if we can help it."

"…Mock battle? What're you talkin' about?"

"Hm? Oh, right. The Guards requested a mock battle with your squad, on the grounds that they wish to test Mitsurugi. They shall be using the modified Gekishins with the parts we developed, save for the older Tsukuyomi in her Takemikazuchi. That happens tomorrow, by the way."

"…Huh, neat. So… You think they might try to harm me during it?"

"Or worse," Simply saying it, not even fazed at the prospect, "They also seem to be setting up an encrypted frequency in their units, probably to contact you or Mitsurugi during the fight. Which is why I'd rather solve this peacefully, if you wouldn't mind cooperating."

"Drop the blizzard already. So, why are you not calling them out on it?"

"Hm? Well, because, in the case that they do not believe your words, I can use the encrypted channel as a deterrent. Accusing them of wanting to break UN protocol, or effectively doing that, could give you a window to flee your cockpit and get to the underground before they approach you. If that happens today, I could delay the talks and accusations for a moment, and my presence would probably be enough to make them reticent to chase after you, but they'll assuredly come after your head soon enough if you don't convince them."

"…And what then?"

"Well, I suppose that if they actually press charges for identity theft… I'd have to kill you."

…

"Haha… Ahaha… So it comes down to that, huh."

"Seriously, what did you expect?" Rolling her eyes, she sighs afterwards, "I cannot, under any circumstances, lose the Royal Guard's neutrality towards me. Should Her Highness begin to hoist animosity towards me, if this matter makes too much noise, couldn't that be used to spark up the third incident you mentioned?"

Oh right, Sagiri. Considering all the deals for the parts, the railgun project, and the loan of the Type-00C, I'm sure many of the more fervent members of both the IJA and IRG are very nettled right now. Any excuse would work for them to try and wrestle things back to the 'proper order', and no way those plotting against Alt. IV will let that chance pass them by.

All it takes is Yuuhi saying or hinting at being displeased with the UN, or either anyone actually going the identity theft route… That just might trigger the coup.

If the UN became an enemy in their eyes… Yeah, the rebels would also come after us. And in this more nationalistic world… maybe more soldiers would take their side… maybe the Royal Guard would…

…Maybe Yuuhi would legitimize the coup here…

I cannot leave any option out of the table, not after what happened last loop with the butterfly effect my actions had back then.

So, yeah. If it's either me or the Empire, the choice is obvious. Of course she'd dispose of me… Of course she'd abandon me… I'm a stranger, after all. What a fool I am, how could I have placed any measure of trust in her? Someone so powerful, so influential… would only ever see me as a mere pawn. It's on me, I was the one who got unreasonable expectations of camaraderie in the first place, the idiot who thought we were allies rather than circumstantial partners.

Repining about it will bestow me no answer, moving forward is all I can do. In solitude, just as it was when I arrived.

"So Shirogane, I expect you to-"

"I know. I'll do my part, Vice Commander," Standing up, I leave the mug on her desk before turning around.

"And, exactly where do you think you're going?"

"To the restroom. I rather be ready when Kasumi comes back."

"You do know my room is literally a door away, right?"

"…If you'd excuse me, I rather have some alone time now. I'll be back in a sec."

Walking to the door, she didn't lock it again so I could leave unimpeded. Stomping my way to the floor's restroom, I saw Kasumi coming closer in the opposite direction. Hesitating for a second, her complexion seemed to tighten as she got to my side.

"Did anything happen, Takeru-san?"

"No, nothing. We just were talking some serious stuff, Sensei should tell you we need to do another recovery session. I'll be back in a sec."

"Um," Timidly grabbing onto one of my sleeves, her eyes admired the luster of the floor, "I'll try to… not hurt you during the projection. I will… do my best, so…"

"It's not on you, Kasumi," Patting her softly, I raise her chin and smile back, "You were not at fault yesterday. I just gotta… Sigh… get my shit together. So, just wait for me in the office, okay?"

"…Yes."

Limply dropping the hand that held my sleeve captive, she remained in place as I went my way. I waved back, then she began to go to the office.

Turning around, slowing down and sighing hard, after reaching the restroom, taking some off time in the toiled, and cleaning my hands, I splashed quire some cold water on my face. And again. And again. Resting my hands on the sink, my eyes return my own reflection's gaze unblinking, enduring the strain

I know… I always knew… I was alone here… She made it clear after the CCSE, that she would only help me if I'm useful for her. Someone who just follows orders ain't an ally, that's just a pawn. That's… all I am for this world's Sensei, just like last loop.

Finally closing my eyes, becoming aware of my breathing, I take a rhythm as I hold the air, only to let it go after a second, time and again.

So… This is all on my shoulders… In a way, it's a good thing. My life is on my own hands, no one else can screw me over now.

"…And like hell I'll let this hold me back. I haven't even confirmed if my world is safe or not yet…"

I just gotta brace up and brave through those memories, as he did as well when he was little. Like I'd let the Guard screw me over again.Time to get my shit together, I'll despair after I'm dead.