Flashback Arc I: Oblivious Misfit
Chapter 51: Enduring the Restart
May 22nd, 1992.
(Takeru's House.)
[Native Takeru]
"B-But I haven't packed anything-"
Kazora-san sent me another scary look, groaning quite a bit, "You had ample time, Shirogane. We are leaving, now."
"Father, please," Maya-nee said, her voice getting lower than before, "Why can you not wait but a moment? What image will this course of action portray?"
"…He won't need much in the orphanage, that small bag is plentiful enough as it is. Let us go, posthaste," And without waiting, he goes to the front door.
I look at Maya-nee, who avoids my gaze as she begins to pull me towards the street.
Why? What did I do wrong? I thought… we were like family…
Sniff… In the end… In the end… I'm… Hic…
Ring! Ring!
"Ugh, a call at a time like this… It was ringing a second ago, too. Let us go," Maya-nee's Dad grabs her suitcase and goes to the door.
Ring! Ring!
"Who is calling here now? Why would anyone…"
"Maya, let's go."
"Father, if someone is calling then let me answer it. If it's one of Takeru's friends, it's better that I explain the situation now, isn't it?"
The old man groans a bit but he nods at her, "Fine, make it quick."
Maya-nee leaves me by the stairs and goes to answer the phone. Who's calling? Nobody ever calls. I mean, Uncle Koetsu sometimes does but he was just here. Jouji and the others are studying for the tests and we had no group homework to do. So… So, who's calling here? If Dad is really gone…
"Hello? Eh… Yohime-sama?!"
Huh? Yohime-san is calling? Why? She never ever called here before… Kazora-san's face went pale like a paper right now. What's wrong with him? I mean… Yohime-san was who chose Maya-nee to be with me… Maybe she's just calling to have her go to Yuuhi's house faster…
"Um… Yohime-sama, why did you call? No, I have no such… Yes, understood. Father, Yohime-sama wishes to speak with you," Looking really serious, Maya-nee offered the phone to her Dad.
The old man seemed surprised, almost scared somewhat. But then he returned to his stern face and took the receiver quite harshly from Maya-nee's hands. What's his problem? It's their fault that they have to talk now… What does she even want, calling out of the blue? Adults are so weird…
"…Yes? Yes, it is me, Yohime-sama. …I was merely going to take the boy to… Huh?! You cannot possibly be serious!" The man hunched over and placed a hand on the wall. His eyes looked about to pop out of his face, "Yohime-sama, please reconsider! This is… No, I am not criticizing your judgment, however… I do have a complain, he's but a peasant! What could he have to… N-No, I am not opposing you, milady. I am merely-"
…What are they arguing about now? The forehead of the old man was now full of sweat, he's giving me an even scarier look. Maya-nee came behind me and placed a hand on my shoulder. What's wrong with her? Her hand is trembling…
"…Shirogane, Yohime-sama wishes to speak with you," The old man said as he looked towards me, handing me the receiver.
With me? W-What does she want from me? Dad is gone now… Will she also scream at me? Tell me I have to go away?
…
I slowly go towards him and grab the phone.
"…Yohime-san?"
"Forgive the screams, Takeru. I did not wish to have Kazora-san raise his voice. How would you be? You're healthy, I hope?" She's not angry, sounding as nice as always.
"Yes… I'm fine."
"Now then, I believe you were already told of your situation?"
"…Yes, I'll have to leave somewhere."
"Yes, that is the case. However, would you instead wish to avoid going to the orphanage?"
"Eh? Y-Yes, I would! But… But they said that-"
"Yes, I can surmise what you were told," Her voice got scary for a second, only to return to her usual, "So Takeru, I have an offer for you. Please listen closely to what I'm about to tell you," I press the receiver hard onto my ear. If I can stay… I don't care if I'm all alone if I can stay in my home. "On your current situation, you will have to be sent to an orphanage. And even then, finding a suitable couple who would like to adopt you at your age shall be a tall ordeal, more so in these harsh times we are facing. So, I have a proposal for you. Would you agree for me to be the one to adopt you?"
"…Eh? You? But… But there's a lot of rules and-"
"Takeru, let's just say that I amply fulfill all the requirements, being from a samurai family. There are some conditions that will be forced on you if you become one of us, however."
"Conditions? Like in the raffles that come in the cereal packs?" Those things that say you need to have the paper to claim the prize, and send a letter somewhere, and a lot of other bothersome things. Me and Sumika never won any, and we don't know anyone who did.
"Yes, something of the sort," She giggled a bit before continuing, "You see, being part of the nobility, all of our members and retainers have to dedicate themselves to our nation, in one way or the other. While I am aware that you've been training very hard every weekend here, it is not the same as if you trained here every day. And the education that you receive in your school cannot compare to the one Mion and Shion receive from their tutors. If I were to adopt you, you would have to start training here every day, just like they do, and you would have to live according to our rules."
"Um… What does that mean? Would I be a samurai then?"
"You would be trained to be one, yes," Then, her usual happy tone disappeared, getting all quiet and serious, "However, being a samurai is no easy task, Takeru. It takes more than swinging a sword to be able to fulfill the role. If you choose to become part of my House, you will have to live a life similar to the one your Father lived."
"Eh? Similar to… Dad?"
"Yes, your Father wasn't able to spend as much time by your side as he desired, right?" Groaning as I nod, my eyes water a bit, it feels as if a lot of needles were hitting my chest, "He had not the freedom to do as he wished. You can now opt to go to the park, to do or not to do your homework today, to go to sleep at the hour you so desire, to watch TV until late if you so please, to choose the future you wish within the options you have. Do you follow?"
"Um… So… Now, I can do what I want, that's what you're saying?"
Did I get that right? I mean… They weren't letting me choose here, they were taking me away without listening. And Maya-nee never lets me watch TV until late, even when I pass my exams.
"Yes, that is right. Even if you end up in an orphanage, you would still have certain freedoms available to you. However, should you choose to let me adopt you, that freedom will be taken away from you. You will have to train when you're told to, go to sleep when you're told to, and follow the career that you're told to. It is also very likely that…" Leaving the silence hanging for a little while, she sighed and then her tone got all scary again, "you might have to fight against the monsters earlier than everyone else as well."
A cold shiver went up my back when she said that. The black monsters that appear on TV, the monsters that killed Dad…
Those awful monsters… That destroy the flying robots so easily…
Me? Fight them? But… if Dad and the other samurais couldn't win… What could I do?!
Kinda going back to her calm tone, Yohime-san continues, "Your Father had to sacrifice much while he was alive, and being a samurai eventually sent him to his death. So, I cannot blame you if you hate us now. However, allow me to extend a helping hand to you. Sadly, I can only ask you once. If you go to the orphanage, there will be little I will be able to do without… drawing certain eyes upon me."
"Eyes? What do you mean?" Why do the adults always talk like that? I don't get what she's trying to say. Is the orphanage so scary that even she doesn't want to go there?
"It matters not. Point being, once you leave I won't be able to help. I know asking this of you now, just after you learned of your Father's passing, is a cruel thing to do. However, it is all I can do. Takeru, do you have an answer?"
…An answer? I… I don't know… I mean… I don't wanna go away… But… if being a samurai is what killed Dad… If I have to go fight the monsters…
And… And if she adopts me… I look back, at the scary old man. I would have to live with them, and he hates me. I never beat Mion or Shion in our duels, despite being girls they're much stronger than me. I'm not that good…
I don't understand that about having to do what you're told, how is that different than what Maya-nee always does? But… But… If Dad was killed by the monsters… What can I do?
Then the cold feeling comes back.
Because then I'll have to go to the orphanage. I'll never see anyone I know again.
I'll be all alone. I'll never come back home.
…
"Takeru? Are you there?"
"…I'm scared." I start shivering in place, closing my eyes tightly.
"Huh?"
"I'm scared. I mean… If Dad couldn't win, what can I do? If all the other samurais got together and lost…"
"Takeru, that's why we train every day. To turn our failures into victories."
Maya-nee also says that. But… But Dad died! There's no training that will make him come back!
"But… If Dad died…"
"Takeru…" She then speaks with that silky, kind voice she sometimes uses, "Your Father fought to protect you. And even if he perished, he didn't 'lose'. Because you're still alive, he reached part of his objective."
"Huh? I… I don't get it…"
"I'm saying that your Father's death wasn't pointless. He loved you and wished to protect you above everything. Even if you don't choose to come to us, at the least know that your Father didn't die in vain for being a samurai. Giving the fight and not 'winning' doesn't mean you can't achieve your objective. You are his victory, Takeru."
I'm Dad's victory? B-But… But I'll have to go away…
I inhale a bit… Dad's letter said… That he fought for me… He asked me to be strong and do my best… Mom also asked me to keep smiling before going away…
If I go away… I don't know where I'll go. I don't know who will want to adopt me. Maybe no one will. What happens then? Uncle Koetsu made a scary face when I asked, so I don't want to know. It must be something like those horror movies Maya-nee doesn't let me watch, the ones that air past midnight.
One thing I do know, I won't be able to be with Maya-nee, Mion and Shion anymore. Will I still be able to go to school? What about Sumika and the rest? Will I still be able to see them?
I don't know… I'm scared… My legs are shaking so much, my neck is all tight as if someone were holding my head underwater. I don't know what should I do… But… But Dad asked me… to do my best…
And if he fought for me… T-Then… Then, could I train to one day be as good as him? Can I help out too? If Yohime-san says she'll train me to be a samurai… even if it's hard… If I can stay with Maya-nee… But… But what if…
"Um… Yohime-san?"
"Yes?"
"What would happen if… if you trained me but I ended up not being good? Would you then send me to an orphanage?" Would they send me away then? Would they start screaming and being mean?
"Do not worry, there are many positions you can take. And you won't be expected to excel in any of your courses. I was merely wishing to let you know that if you become one of us, your work will be chosen for you and you won't be able to say no. I shan't send you away, Takeru. So choose freely without fears. Would you like to come to us?"
"You won't send me away if I'm bad?"
"Of course I won't."
"And you won't scream at me or be mean to me like the old man?"
"I will not," Then, her voice got scary again, "And I assure you, I shan't allow anyone to do anything of the sort."
"R-Really?"
"Yes, truly. I know it might be hard to grasp for you, but once you become our fellow you'll be part of the House, so nobody would ever try to be unnecessarily mean to you as long as you behave."
So they won't be mean? Then… I look towards Maya-nee, who had her eyes filled with clouds as they were half closed. The old man was still glaring at me.
What do I want to do?
I… I don't want to be alone. I don't want to go away.
But… Can I do it, Dad? Can I be as strong as you? I don't know… But… But… he asked me… to do my best…
So… All the other adults were mean, they all said they could do nothing because of these 'rules'. But if Yohime-san can help me… She's always so calm, so kind… Will she really help me?
"Yohime-san?"
"Yes, Takeru?"
"Are you really… going to adopt me?" It took a lot to say that without stuttering.
"Yes, if you agree."
"Then… C-Can you do that, please? Please don't leave me alone. I don't wanna go away. I'll do my best so… Um…"
"Don't worry, Takeru. From now on, you're one of us. Please, pass the receiver to Kazora-san."
"Yes… Um… Kazora-san…" The old man slowly came to my side and took the receiver, not so harshly this time.
I quietly move away from him. My hands are still shaking, I still feel cold all over… My neck hurt and my nose is running… Ugh…
"Takeru…" Maya-nee came to my side and cleaned my face with a handkerchief, "You were really brave right now."
"Huh? Brave?"
"Yes, it takes a great effort to ask for help when you're so scared. I was sure you were going to start crying. How are you feeling?" She crouched by my side, placing a hand on my shoulder.
"…Scared. What's going to happen to me now?"
She taps her glasses, looking concerned, "Well… I suppose we'll have to go arrange some paperwork for the adoption. I also believe you'll have to come with us and live in Yuuhi-sama's house from now on."
"Huh?! But… What about this house? This is my home!"
"Yes, but… well, until you finish your training you'll have to stay there with Mion and Shion. That being said, are you sure of this?" She stopped and placed a hand on my cheek, scanning my face "Training to be a samurai is not an easy task. Let me tell you I was holding back on you all this time. What awaits you is a much more harsher training, Takeru. And you will have to become a public servant, regardless of your wishes. Are you sure you wish to come with us?"
"…You don't want me to go with you?"
"That's not it. I am merely worried about you. Even if you end up alone, you still are free to choose what to do with your life. If you come with us…"
I would be just like Dad. Dad wanted to be with me and Mom, but he couldn't. Mom always said that all we had was thanks to Dad being a samurai. I don't know what a public servant is, but if I can be like Dad… If I can help out Maya-nee and the rest…
I can't be scared, Dad asked me… He asked me to do my best. I don't know why they didn't tell me this before, instead of scaring me with those rules… B-But…
"Maya-nee, will you be with me if I go? Even if I'm bad at studying?" I look at her, I can feel a few tears running down my cheeks.
She wipes them off and gives me a smile, nodding, "Yes, I will be looking after you whenever I can. Matters not how you perform, I won't leave you alone."
"And you all really won't send me away if I'm not good?"
"Of course not, perish the thought."
"What about the rules?"
"Well… Certain people are strong enough to be able to… navigate around the rules," Again tapping her glasses, getting all serious, she looks away. What does that mean? You adults are so complicated… "But rest assured, Yohime-sama can meet all the rules needed to adopt you. So, do you truly wish to come with us?"
"Yes, I'll go. I-I'll do my best so… please don't leave me alone…" I hug her and she hugs me back, patting my back, making that awful cold feeling go away.
"There, there. Don't worry, it'll be okay. I'll be with you, Takeru. So don't be scared, okay?"
"Yes…"
"Maya, Shirogane, Yohime-sama has ordered us to go back to her. Just to make sure, you are prepared to be one of us, kid?" The old man said in a loud, harsh tone as he glared at me again.
"Father, please stop trying to frighten Takeru. He already said-"
"I wish to hear him, Maya. Move aside and let him speak," He said in a loud tone, giving Maya-nee a harsh glare.
"Father, he is but a child. What do you expect you gain from this?"
"I told you to move aside! Have your ears gone daft, Maya? Let me remind you that-"
"S-Stop bullying Maya-nee!"
"What did you say, Shirogane?!"
"I told you to stop bullying Maya-nee! Why are you so mean to us?! I hate you! Bleh!" I hug Maya-nee tightly, giving him a nasty glare back as he groans.
"Why you… You think this kind of behavior will be tolerated?!"
"You're the one that's being rude! Maya-nee is awesome, don't be mean to her!"
"Grr… See, Maya? A kid like him won't-"
"Father," Maya-nee pets my head as she looks at him, her tone cold and scary as it hasn't been in a long time, "I believe that Takeru speaks the truth. You've been unnecessarily hostile since you arrived, especially to a young boy who just lost his father. Perhaps speaking in a more amicable tone would yield better results? Surely you're capable of that."
"…Hmph, to think you would talk back to me." They remain quiet, glaring at each other. After a while, the old man sighs and rubs his beard, "So Shirogane, are you prepared for training to be a samurai? If you choose to come with us, no matter how much you cry later you won't be coming back." And again, stared at me with those scary eyes.
…I know. I know that I'm not as good as Mion and Shion. But… I just gotta learn! If Dad could do it, so can I! And if he fought to protect the ones he loved… Then I'll do the same! I'll be just like Dad!
…Even if my legs are still shaking and I'm really scared of being with this old man. I don't want to leave… But if I have to leave, I rather go with Maya-nee and do my best with her.
"Yes, I'll do my best in the training. And I won't cry."
"Oh, really now?"
"Father, I'll have you know that when Takeru affirms something, he usually manages to do what he says. He is very stubborn and hard working when he wants something." Maya-nee says as she taps her glasses, glaring at the old man.
"…I see. I suppose you have been teaching him a good thing or two. In any case, let's not waste another second. Yohime-sama is awaiting us," Kazora-san then turns around and quickly goes to the door.
Maya-nee pats my back and gives me a smile, then she pulls my hand. I follow her, and before leaving I take a look back.
…Will I ever come back here? How will I do these trainings? What about school and my exams?
I'm scared. And sad. Dad is… Dad is really gone? We'll never talk again? Never read again, never eat anything together again… Sniff…
And… now I'm going away… B-But… But I'll do my best… Mom and Dad… I'll become a samurai you can be proud of! Even if the old man is really scary… I don't know what I can do or how I'll do it, but I'll do my best effort to be good from now on.
Once we got inside the big car, I looked at the shape of my house as it became tiny in the distance.
When I couldn't see it anymore I leaned on Maya-nee's arm, grabbing it tightly.
And then I cried. I cried and cried quietly until I fell asleep.
Same day. 10:24 PM.
(Koubuin Main House.)
"Takeru… Takeru, wake up."
"Mmgh… Yawn…" I rub my eyes, feeling someone shake my shoulders, "…Maya-nee?"
"Are you awake, Takeru?" She said in a low voice, still shaking my shoulder.
I blink a few times until I see everything clearly. Nodding as I rise up from where I was sleeping, a sudden cold gusts makes me shudder.
The long car had stopped and it was really dark outside, Maya-nee was looking at me from outside the door. Getting out of the car, I saw that we were already on Yuuhi's house. It's really cold and dark though, what hour is it?
Maya-nee grabs my hand and takes me towards the door. There, a lot of samurai rangers were waiting for us. They looked at us and gave us a bow as we passed the big wooden gate.
A man with two coffee-colored spiky horns of hair on the side of his head came towards us as we got closer to them. He was wearing the uniform of the samurai in a red that was stronger than the one Mana-nee uses.
"Col. Tsukuyomi, we heard the news, Yohime-sama is waiting. This way, please," All of them immediately stood aside once Coffee Horns said that, bowing to Kazora-san as he walked to the door.
As me and Maya-nee followed behind, I could see some of them gave me those same scary eyes Kazora-san made when we were back home. Maya-nee pulled me closer to her as we entered the house, her hand feeling really tense.
…What are they going to do now? Yohime-san said she was going to adopt me… but how will she do that? What about the rules?
I still feel really, really nervous about this… What if I'm not good at all and they send me to the orphanage? Dad… Mom… Will I ever go back to my house? I shiver and look down, thinking about how it will be to live with Kazora-san and the rest, about what may happen now. I gulp and grab Maya-nee's hand tighter as we got to Yohime-san's room.
As we enter, I saw that Yohime-san and the other old woman that's always around Yuuhi were sitting on their usual spot. Then, as usual, we give her a bow.
"Welcome, please take a seat," Yohime-san said with a smile, sounding as always as we sat down.
"Yohime-sama, if I may," Kazora-san didn't sat down though, and instead took a step towards them, "I would like to have a word in private with you."
"There is no need, I believe I have made my wishes clear enough." She looked at Kazora-san as she stopped smiling.
"Even so, I must insist. Is this truly the best course of action, milady?"
"I believe Takahisa-sama already had a talk with you regarding this matter. When a samurai gives his word, he must see that his vow is never broken. And now, it falls to us to ensure his words are followed upon. I assumed you adhered to the honor code as well, Kazora-san. What is it that has you speaking against the wishes of both of your leaders?"
I didn't knew Yohime-san could be so scary. She slowly moved some of her hair off her face, giving Kazora-san an angry glare like how Maya-nee does when I get in a fight in school.
"…Nothing but worry towards the outcome of this decision. Shirogane is not qualified to walk this path," He threw another scary gaze at me as he said that.
Why does he hate me that much? I didn't do anything to him… I look down, tightening my lips.
"In that case, you should banish all worry from you, Kazora-san," She said, again calm and kind, "We shall ensure Takeru is comfortable enough here. And you, as a servant of the Koubuin House, will undoubtedly do your best effort in aiding him to familiarize himself to his new lifestyle, I am sure," Again, she made that scary face as she rested her chin on her fingers. Kazora-san stood there for a second, then bowed to her and sat down by Maya-nee's side, "Now then, Takeru?"
"Y-Yes?"
"Considering Kazora-san's fair placed worries… Allow me to ask you one last time. Do you truly wish me to adopt you?"
"…If you don't, I'll end up in an orphanage, right?" She nods, "Then, yes, I do. I promise I'll do my best from now," I couldn't keep my hands quiet as I spoke. I will do my best, but what if I'm still not good enough?
"I see," She then smiled as sweetly as she always does, "Worry not, Takeru. From now on you're one of us. Now then, allow me to first give you an explanation of what you'll have to do from now on. Chamberlain, the papers please."
The other old woman came towards us with some papers. Yohime-san explained to me that people can't just adopt a child because they want to, the rules say the child has to also agree. That's why there's a lot of rules in what the new parents have to do to adopt a kid, just like Uncle Koetsu said, to prevent bad people from ever taking a child with them.
They told me all I had to do was know that Takahisa-san had prepared some papers before he and Dad left with the other samurai, and that when tomorrow someone from the care services would come to talk with me all I had to do was say I wanted to stay here. Yohime-san said she would take care of all the bureaucracy, whatever that is, and then she explained to me what I had to do from now on.
"So I can't go back to my school?"
"No Takeru, you cannot. For the following months, you'll be home schooled here," Yohime-san replied.
"But what about my tests? Or my friends? Can I still go visit them?"
"Hmm… Well, I suppose we could allow you to visit your friends from time to time. However, from now on you'll have to study here. Once we see how good you are and which role we'll bestow you with, we'll assign you to a school after summer vacation."
"I don't get it, what's this about a role?"
"It means you'll be studying in a special school designed to prepare you for your job," Maya-nee said.
"Exactly as Maya said," Yohime-san nodded, "I believe I did tell you that you would become a public servant if you chose to be one of us, did I not?"
"Oh, right. Um… What is a public servant?"
"Someone who serves the Empire. Think of police officers, doctors and teachers," She again smiled sweetly, entwining her fingers together, "It means you will have to work for the good of this nation. Whether it is in a public role or as a member of one of our businesses will be decided after these next months."
"So… After you see how smart I am, you'll tell me what it is that I can do?"
"Precisely. That being said, I suppose… Did you wish to become a Royal Guard in image of your father?"
"Yohime-sama, if I may, I believe Takeru shouldn't-"
"Maya, stand down. This is something Takeru has to decide on his own,"
Why are they getting so upset? I mean… I know the samurai have to fight against the monsters, but…
"Milady, forgive the rudeness, however I do not think it wise to offer Takeru such a position. You should know he is nowhere near the same skill of Mion and Shion," Maya-nee sounded weird, worried and tense but… also scared?
"They are a year older than him, so I do not find the comparison fair," Yohime-san is still calm as always, though, "Regardless, you shall continue to monitor his performance in these days to come."
"The training he'll need to become a Royal Guard is one too harsh for him. Takeru isn't-" I pulled Maya-nee's sleeve and she stopped.
"Maya-nee, I want to be a samurai just like Dad. Why do you not want me to?" Closing her eyes for a second, then she tapped her glasses as she relaxed again.
"I am merely worried about you. No one receives special treatment here, no one will wait for you to catch up. I don't think you're ready."
"But if Dad became a samurai, why can't I?" Her lips moved weirdly for a second again.
"…Being a samurai is not an easy task, Takeru. Are you certain you wish to train to join the Royal Guard?"
…I really don't know. I mean, I know Mion and Shion are smarter and stronger than me. So that means I'll have to study a lot, and a lot of math and history too. But… But Dad could do it, so I can too. And if they give me another of those roles I might not be able to be with Maya-nee anymore… And I don't want that. So… I just have to do my best!
Plucking my lips as I give a nod, my eyes don't leave hers. Maya-nee remains staring at me for a second until she also nods at me, Kazora-san was now giving me an even nastier look. My stomach felt empty and hurt under his glare, but I refused to look down this time.
"Well, I believe Takeru has made his wishes clear enough," Yohime-san said, smiling again, "Now then, it is late already. Maya, take Takeru to his room. He'll have to rise early tomorrow for both this paperwork and his first lessons to adapt to his new home. Takeru, please do rest assured. You're safe with us now," Her eyes softened up as she slightly tilted her head, it somehow… reminds me of Mom's gaze.
I nod and Maya-nee got up, helping me up as well. Kazora-san stayed behind, though. After we gave Yohime-san a bow, we got out of the room and one of the samurai rangers in gray lead us to what was going to be my room from now on.
Still… Yuuhi's house is really big. If I have to live here now I'm gonna get lost. Did Dad spent his days in a place like this? How was it for him, to be a samurai ranger? He never told me anything about that, always said it was a secret, and Takahisa-san also said the same.
Did the others look at Dad with those same scary eyes? Were they also mean to him? Dad… How did you become a samurai? Why did you lose, if all of you were together?
Again feeling as if I had slugs crawling on me, but that were slowly biting needles into me too, my chest gets all cold and tensed up, as if I had ran a lot and had to gasp for air. It's like that poem said, like a fruit of a tree wildly slashed by the wind, falling and rolling away from its roots. I feel like that, like an apple that fell to the street and got crushed by a car.
After walking a lot, we arrive at what they called the dorm area. Though, the place still looks like rest of the house, just with more doors on the sides. It's not like my house, the walls and doors look really thin. My house… will I ever go back there? What about my stuff?
"The third room down this hallway shall be Shirogane's room from now on," The gray samurai that was coming with us said, "The few belongings he brought with him should already be there. I shall be taking my leave here," She gives us a small nod, turning around.
"Well, let's go Takeru," Maya-nee pulls me and we go to my new room.
We slid the door open and enter. It's a bit smaller than my room, there's a futon instead of a bed, a small window in front of us, and a wardrobe like the one back home. The small bag I brought was left on the floor near a wall.
Maya-nee helped me put my clothes in place, and, after getting in my pajamas, she sat on the floor by my side as I got inside the futon. She looks kinda sad, her brows are all tense and wrinkly.
"Maya-nee… Will everything really be alright?" She pats my head softly as her face relaxes.
"Yes, everything will be fine, Takeru. However, do you truly wish to follow in your father's footsteps?"
"Is being a samurai that scary?"
"Well… It is a harsh work. You'll have to follow the rules closely and mind your manners, but above all you'll have to shoulder many responsibilities. You will have to study much if you wish to stay here, but even more if you wish to become a Royal Guard. Also, you should start using that term instead of samurai rangers."
"…Maya-nee, did Dad also have to do the same to become a samurai?"
"I suppose so."
"And…" I grip the edges of the sheets, pursing my lips a bit, "We are gonna be alright? The monsters… aren't coming here soon?"
"Don't worry, we're safe here. Takahisa-sama and his fellows fought bravely so that we can be at ease now."
"…Is Dad really gone then?" Unable to look up, I ask.
She ruffles my hair slowly as she sighs, "Yes, that is the case. But don't be scared, no matter what path you're made to follow I'll be keeping an eye on you from my position. Now, try to sleep as much as you can. I'll come for you in the morning."
"You can't stay with me until I fall asleep?"
"No, I have to go back to my own room and rearrange my belongings as well. Do not worry, you're safe here," She stood up, went to the door and flicked the light switch, "Good night, Takeru."
"…Yes, good night."
As Maya-nee left, I looked at the window from where I was. I can't see much from here, but some light enters from there.
…What will happen from now on? I wonder how hard these new classes will be… Dad, did you also have to go through this? I roll to a side, hugging myself. I inhale slowly through my nose. I can't be scared, everything will be fine… Maya-nee is here, Yohime-san was nice too.
Despite having heard their words and seeing they were saying the truth, some tears still come out. Dad is gone… Just like Mom. Can I do it, Dad? Sniff… What will happen if I fail all the tests?
I cough a few times as if a cloud of dust covered me. Mulling over what may happen as I slowly cried a bit, remembering both Dad's letter and Kazora-san's yells as I rustled under the sheets, I closed my eyes and tried to fall asleep.