I couldn't even speak as I stared at the two of them. What did she mean—his wife? He couldn't be married! For God's sake, he had dated Sadie! How could he possibly be married? Ugghhhhh…I shook my head at the bombarding questions trying to clear my sudden blurred vision as Tommy's face grew dark with anger and regret.
"Wife?" I whispered on a choking sob as I looked into Tommy's—no excuse me, Thomas's eyes looking for any sort of sign that it was all a lie, but when he only nodded sullenly, I felt my whole world crash like a porcelain vase around my feet. Oh my God!
"She is cute, Tom." The woman stated merrily from behind us as she perused me critically, "But a little on the young side, don't you think?" She replied again as I refused to turn around and look at her. Kwest's words kept ringing through my head as I watched Tom glare at the woman over my shoulder "It wasn't his fault." I heard again through my head as I tried to categorize the situation as well as I could in my mind. "Don't over-react, Jude!" I kept telling myself as I heard the woman laugh behind me.
"Oh, I'm sorry. Did I come at a bad time?" She asked sheepishly as Tommy pointed at the studio behind her. I still didn't look anywhere but at him as his eyes narrowed menacingly.
"Get out, Justine!" He shouted as everyone in the studio behind us watched in fascination. I couldn't help but close my eyes and pinch myself as I heard the girl sigh sourly before slamming the door shut with a huff. I felt Tom leaning over in front of me as I stared resolutely at the back of my eyelids.
"Look at me, Jude!" He commanded desperately as I opened my eyes to find him staring at me intently almost as if a look alone could convince me he was sorry about what had happened. I just couldn't say anything.
"I was nineteen years old. It happened a year after Portia and I divorced, Jude." He said heavily as if that would make everything more clear for me. I just laughed mockingly.
"Wow, Tom! Two wives under your belt. How many do you have to have before you start to feel like a real man?" I asked sardonically as he grabbed me by the flesh of my arms firmly—shaking me gently as he did.
"I was drugged, Jude. She was a friend of mine—a supermodel making waves in the business. I was a huge star at the time, and she finagled my phone number out of her agent. I was pretty selective about the women I dated back then, Jude—no depth to them, only good looks. She was a huge fan, and I enjoyed having her to show off after our performances. Soon, we were an item. And then when I grew tired of her—because I always did with the women I dated back then—I dumped her, and she retaliated. She got me drunk one night and slipped just enough of a tranquilizer into my drink that I was pretty conducive to whatever scheme she came up with. The next thing I knew, I woke up one morning married to her. Of course, I went to draw up annulment papers immediately stating irreconcilable differences, but she threw a fit and went to the court with a sob story about my treatment of her. All it took was her sleeping with the judge and I was stuck paying alimony to her under the condition that we could be legally separated. She's not crazy, Jude. All she wanted was money, and through me, she saw a way to get it. I've been trying for years to push for divorce instead." He explained miserably as I looked up into his face in astonishment. My God! What was this—Days of Our Lives? I just stared at him as he looked up at me with a pleading expression.
"I don't love her, Jude. I never have. Damn it all to hell!" He shouted as he pushed me against the wall, pressing his lips to mine in an explosion of furious passion, and I moaned as I tried my best not to respond, but despite it all, I still found I cared for him more than I should. I reveled in the feel of his arms wrapped around me, the fierce possessiveness that he poured into the kiss, but a nagging little voice in my head brought me back to reality as everything finally processed in my mind, and I pushed against him just enough that he pulled back to look into my face.
"Oh my God, you're married!" I whispered as the shock crumbled into something more tangible. Tom let his head drop toward the floor as he pushed away from the wall.
"On paper, Jude…Just on paper." He said as he brought his hand up to cover his heart. "Now here.." He said as he tapped his chest. "Is a different story." He finished as he leaned against the wall opposite me. This was just so so very wrong. Shit! What were we going to do? I couldn't look at him as I marched across the room to stand staring directly at his chest, but I ran my fingers up his arms anyway before placing my hand where he had put his over his heart earlier.
"Then I guess I can still hope that you are saving this part of yourself for someone else?" I asked quietly as Tom sighed heavily before placing his hand over mine and squeezing gently.
"I'm starting to think I've already given it away." He murmured as a sound at the door caused me to back away with a small sob.
"I think I should go home and call it a day." I said wearily as I nodded at him with a soft smile before dashing out the studio door, ignoring the pointed stares and horrific laughter of Tom's horrible horrible wife as I made my way toward the parking lot and home—my sanctuary. Oh, if only I knew how much I was about to learn that sanctuaries are people instead of places.