I had to get out of here. There was just no if's, and's, or but's about it. I needed space to think—to figure things out, and I really didn't think that I was going to get that opportunity as long as I was anywhere near Tom Quincy's vicinity.
A rustling noise outside the door had me almost scurrying like a frightened mouse into the corner of the room as Sadie's voice suddenly filled the silent space.
"I have some clothes for you, Jude." She said brightly as I just stared at the door numbly—taking several minutes just to register what she had said.
"Uh…okay great. Just leave them outside the door, okay? I just took a shower, and…hot dog, I have my voice back." I finished in amazement as I ran a hand over the smooth column of my throat. I was horribly and devastatingly hoarse, but at least I could speak again. A laugh outside the door clued me in to the fact that Sadie had heard me all too clearly.
"You might have it back, but you may not want to use it for a while. You sound like something out of a Freddy Kruger movie." She chuckled softly as I heard something 'plop' onto the floor outside.
"You can thank me later for the clothes, little sis." She said with a certain glibness to her voice as I finally heard her footsteps fading down the hall. Even minutes after she had walked away, I still sat there—staring into space, almost afraid to remove the towel because it had come to represent so much more than just a tool to dry off with. It was his—it was the garment that had brought us closer than we had ever been before, and that made it both comforting and tormenting at the same time. Why was I doing this to myself? I wasn't a child anymore. No, the past year of ups and downs had pretty much guaranteed my bumpy ride into young adulthood—probably even more so than most my age. I mean, geez, I wasn't all that much younger than Sadie, only by a couple of years, and yet everyone acted as if what she did was okay compared to the decisions that I made. Damn, I was just so frustrated with everything.
Finally, giving up the confusing train of thoughts that kept bombarding through my brain, I walked over to the door and dragged in the bag of clothes from the hallway while listening to the sounds of Tom's smooth deep voice and Sadie's high tinkling laugh from down below. I wish it were that easy for me to just forget, but my brain just didn't work that way. Far from it.
Peeking into the bag, I rifled through the items until I finally unearthed a pair of holy blue jeans and a red form fittingsweater with matching high-heeled boots. Geez, what was it with Sadie and heels. Hadn't she ever heard of tennis shoes? I shook my head back and forth in amusement as I looked over myself critically in Tommy's mirror before grabbing a brush lying on Tom's dresser—running it through the tangled mess on my head while thinking of ways to get away, just for a little while. A phone number stuffed in the corner of Tom's mirror caught my eye, and I almost gasped as a light bulb suddenly exploded in my head. Why not? Why the freakin' hell not? Grabbing the number off the mirror, I stalked over to Tom's phone with one determined tilt of my chin—refusing to allow myself to back down from my decision. The line rang incessantly before a voice carried over the empty space almost drowsily. I started talking animatedly, trying my best to get my point across despite the hoarseness dominating my tone.
"Jude…I don't know about this. Have you even thought this through properly?" He asked with a tone that emanated with uncertainty and dread. I just shrugged from my end.
"That's the problem. I need a place to think." I said as the line grew quiet with the exception of a few heavy sighs emanating from the other end.
"Look, I'll call you a cab. Just be outside to meet it, alright?" He said with a slightly hesitant tone as if he were afraid the step he was taking would be something he would later regret.
"Thank you." I said with a huge sigh of relief as I laid the phone back down in its cradle before slinging the bag of clothes Sadie had given me over my shoulder. Cracking the door open silently, I peered down the stairs quickly to make sure the way was clear before making a run for the door and a chance at resolution.