Author's Note: Wow you guys! The reviews were amazing. And also the reason I keep going with this story. I love them. Big shout outs and hugs thrown your way. I knew when I wrote the last chapter that it was shocking, but I wanted to pretty much go into more depth into Tommy's character and why he is the way he is. I think you'll like where I take it, but don't take my word for it, Read and review and please let me know what you guys think because that's what it's all about. Smiles.
Justine looked over at Tommy uneasily before smiling once again at me with a tart expression intending, I guess, to make me feel less important because of my ignorance—as if she and Tom shared a bond that no one else could understand. Damned if I was going to let her do that to me.
"You're insane." I stated point blank as Justine raised a brow in something resembling a mix between irritation and amusement before glancing back at Tom incredulously.
"Did she just call me crazy, Thomas?" She asked in false bewilderment as Tommy quirked a brow nonchalantly.
"And I'd say she wasn't half off the mark." Tom stated dryly as Justine threw him a piercing glare—giving me the impression that if looks could kill, then Tom would be one miserable pile of ash right about now. Either way, I could care less. I had known Tom for a little over a year and, even though there were things I was just discovering about him that I hadn't known before, I wasn't the least bit fazed by it because there was one thing I did know for certain. Whatever he had done in the past was just that—the past. It was not the man he was now, and that's the man I cared about. Loved if I was really being honest with myself.
"I don't want to know." I said suddenly as Tommy and Justine both turned toward me in surprise.
"What?" Justine asked so flabbergasted that I actually felt a small spark of satisfaction out of stunning her. Tom just looked over at me quietly—perusing me with those unreadable eyes in a way that made my toes curl and my hair straighten.
"I don't want to know." I said again as I stared first down at the ground and then back up at them again. Some things were just better left buried.
"You trust him that much?" Justine asked cynically as I looked over into Tom's eyes calmly before facing Justine stoically—letting my eyes speak for me as I stared unblinkingly in her direction.
"Enough to know that he's kept it from me for a reason. That's good enough for me." I said with a slow shake of my head before turning back toward the building with silent resolution. I was trying so so very hard not to let my curiosity get the better of me.
"What if I told you that the man he killed had a child?" Justine asked bitingly as I froze again, letting the information absorb into my brain securely before discarding it again. I wasn't going to let her get the best of me. I just wasn't. My hand closed over the doorknob securely just about to turn it for a second time that day when Tom's warm, large hands suddenly closed over mine gently—pulling me away from the enclosure before leaning forward enough that his mouth almost touched my ear.
"You'll always wonder if you walked away now, Jude." He said in a low tone as Justine laughed from behind us.
"Confessing are we, Quincy?" She asked as both Tom and I turned to her in aggravation.
"Shut up, Justine!" We both said in unison as Tom moved in front of me quickly before leading me over to the stairs of the fire escape where we had kissed on my sixteenth birthday. Talk about a place created just for stunning realizations. I wasn't one for fidgeting, but right now I was just one plain, very mixed up nervous wreck. There was no turning back now, no placing my hands over my ears like a fitful child yelling that 'I just wanted things to remain the same.' Because it was too late for that. Tom just looked at me sullenly.
"I was just about to turn nineteen, Jude. My best friend and I were being idiots—celebrating my impending birthday by drinking way too much—by canvassing for women…." Tom continued as Justine paced in agitation in front of us.
"You liar!" She yelled as Tom glanced up at her coldly.
"I loved him like a brother, Justine, but he wasn't as perfect as everyone wants to make him out to be now that he's gone. Even his wife knows that." Tom answered coolly before turning back to me with tired looking eyes.
"His name was Jonathan. He was married with a baby on the way, and while I was going through my rebound phase after Portia, he was looking for a way to forget his fears about discovering his wife was pregnant. So we did what any stupid, red-blooded male would do—we got wasted, we had a few women, and then we got into a car. Jon had wanted to drive, but I argued with him until eventually we decided to make a decision by flipping a coin. When we kept dropping the damn thing because we were too drunk to hold it, we did rock, paper, scissors instead, and I won. A stupid game, Jude—that's all it took to get me into the driver's seat." Tom said quietly, faltering slightly as Justine kicked at pebbles on the pavement in anger, letting the loose debris rain on us as he flung her a look of despair. I was missing something in that look, and I wondered belatedly if I really wanted to know what. Tom took a deep breath before running a hand wearily through his hair.
"The roads were fine that night—no rain, no roadwork, no dangerous curves. I was just drunk off my flippin' ass and that was all it took. One wrong swerve into the wrong lane, and an oncoming car smashed into the passenger side of the vehicle causing me to spin off the road before flipping three times." Tom relayed as my body grew numb when his tone lowered painfully.
"I was frozen in shock and pain. Breathing hurt, and I didn't find out until later that I had broken over four ribs and slightly punctured a lung, but all of that didn't matter when I turned to look for Jonathan only to discover he wasn't moving. I reached for him, placed my hand against the side of his neck praying for a pulse—desperately looking for some way to bring him into consciousness, but there was nothing. I was screaming when the police showed up, and it was almost like some twisted dream—watching as the paramedics worked on him before finally calling his time of death." Tom continued as I felt my heart literally break at the pain I saw radiating across his face. I could tell he still blamed himself for the whole accident. Hell, I think I would have too if it had been me. I tried to reach out and touch him but he shook his head at me instead.
"Don't, Jude. Not now." He murmured before looking over at an irritated Justine sadly. "I didn't go unpunished, Jude. No, I spent six months in prison before being let out on parole. My publicists kept it all hush hush by saying something about me being sent home on family business, but I wasn't the same after that. It was part of the reason I found it hard to keep performing with Boyz Attack. After that, I spent years trying to make up for it—being with his wife when their baby was born, and basically spending a good deal of time and money making sure that child grows up not wanting or needing anything." Tom finished as I just sat there staring between the two as Justine growled vehemently. So that's why he disappeared for days at a time. That's why he found it hard to perform the more shallow music from his band days—leaning now towards lyrics with power and depth. Damn, it explained so much.
"He's good at making you feel sorry for him." Justine stated caustically as I glanced down quickly at the ground before seeking her gaze determinedly.
"And how do you fit into the whole thing?" I asked with a quirk of my brow as Justine glared at Tom before looking over at me with a look of hatred.
"I'm Jonathan's twin sister." She stated as a wave of pain flitted over her features as I took in a deep, astonished breath. Oh my God!
"Are you trying to tell me…?" I began as Tom interrupted delicately.
"That she coerced me into marriage by making sure I was incapacitated and then refusing to divorce me." Tom replied as I looked at Tom and Justine in shock as a sudden realization suddenly clicked in my head. Dear God! That's what Kwest had meant when he talked about Tom's haunting past—about him even being assigned a guard to always make him feel as if he were in prison. I looked over at Justine with a look of awe.
"Marriage is your vengeance, isn't it?" I asked as mildly as I could as Justine stared at me silently while Tommy just sat there as if this whole ordeal had drained him. Wow! This was way beyond complicated, it was downright messed up.