A/N: I got requests for Nick's pov, so here it is! I claim him, ladies! I dream of Nicky…
Fall 2000. That's when my life changed forever. That's when Sara Sidle, beautiful, smart, mouthy Sara, came into my life. She was asked by Grissom to move to Las Vegas to investigate one of my good buddies, Warrick Brown. When I first heard he was being investigated, I decided I'd make that person's life a living hell. Then I met her. And I fell for her. Bad. I mean, what sane man wouldn't? She's gorgeous, smart, and funny in her own way, if you can look past her obsessiveness and the fact that she's a workaholic. But I adore her – all of her – and I have for six years now. I think she likes me too, but we're both too chicken to do anything about it. I wouldn't want to ruin our friendship if things ever turned sour. I think people have been seeing our connection blossom around the lab. They're probably seeing signs. Signs that I, Nick Stokes, am in love with Sara Sidle. Here are those signs.
Sign One: You purposely wear hideous shirts so she'll comment on their hideosity (Yes, I know that's not a word) and you'll have to change in front of her.
I was waiting for her, yes I was. I brought that shirt to work, the shirt my grandmother gave me for Christmas the previous year, just so she'd tell me to take it off. And perfect timing! My heart fluttered when she told me I looked fine, and I brushed it off externally, saying it was harassment. But inside I was giddy as a schoolboy crushing on his teacher. She thought I was hot. Who do you think I work out for? I changed to a blue button-up when she thought I thought she was gone. She doesn't know I know: I flash my muscles for her. Only for her.
Sign Two: When you pass by a lingerie store, you picture her in each piece.
I was walking through the mall with one of my girl friends (notice the space between the two words: a friend who is a girl). She's always flirted with me like crazy, but that day my mind was far away, dreaming of Sara Sidle. It was after I'd caught her singing to herself the first time. She had the voice of an angel, and I think in that moment I fell in love with her. Anyways, we were walking through Victoria's Secret and she was holding up all these get-ups, flashing her pearly smile at me. I just smiled back a little and nodded, playing along, but really I wanted to be here with Sara. I wanted her to model them for me and hold them up with a huge grin plastered on her face, just for me. After imagining her in all these different things, I had to pay a visit to the restroom. And that poor girl thought it was because of her.
Sign Three: You tell her flat out you like lace over leather, with everyone in earshot.
It popped out! I just couldn't resist. Sara had been flirting with me constantly, and I flirted back shamelessly. I'm a guy! I'm a frat boy! I can't help myself. But seriously, with Sara, leather or lace would be fine, or preferably nothing at all.
Sign Four: When alien priests suggest you marry, you panic and deny it, because you know in reality you want it to happen, and that would mean all your dreams were coming true.
This is perhaps one of the fondest moments of my life. That freaky priest that buried his friend alive thought Sara and I should get married. Did he really see a connection just like that, or was he just trying to make money? I'll probably never know, but it made my insides turn all to mush. I flat out denied it quickly, shaking my head, and mouthing 'no', but I had to do it. We were on a case, and that's not how I want Sara finding out I'm in love with her. I want my confession to be private, at one of our apartments, at the beach, or at a romantic dinner. I turned bright red, I'm sure, and laughed almost hysterically when he said She's gonna get ya'! Hopefully someday we'll get married, but it most definitely will not be at the alien chapel. It'll be a big fat Texas wedding, and the whole family would fall in love with her. I'm sure of it.
Sign Five: You offer to rip a towel bar off the wall so you can show off your muscles.
It was so cute, the way she kept huffing and puffing and trying to pull that rack off the wall with her huge helmet on. And that adorable groan she made was just priceless! God love her, the little shrimp. So like most anyone from the male species, I offered to help. Not just to help, but to show off my supreme manliness, or so I've been told. I've got a Tom Cruise thing going on, if I do say so myself. I saw her mouth practically drop as I strained a little, and pulled that sucker right off. Wooowee! Her face was priceless. And I did have an excuse – we were on a case.
Sign Six: When she flirts with other guys, it breaks your heart, and you're so insanely jealous it's unnerving.
The worst was when she was dating that Hank punk. The guy didn't deserve to even breathe the same are she does. I know how to treat a lady right – the chivalrous Texan way. I never kiss and tell, and I never even told anyone about the time she puked at a decomp. I'm a man of my word.
But the constant monotony of Grissom, Grissom, Grissom, is what still gets me. The poor girl's father was murdered in front of her eyes, and she's been living without a father ever since. No wonder she looks to Grissom for approval. Isn't there something called and Electric complex or something? I don't know, I heard it somewhere. Where she looks for approval from older men and father figures. I pray every night that she may someday find a place for little old me, in that tender, broken heart of hers. When she finally realizes Grissom isn't the one, I'll be waiting with my arms open.
Sign Seven: You'd work any case to be with her, including the worst decomp you've ever seen…and smelled.
Wherever she goes, I will follow. I enjoy working solos just like everyone else, but if I could pick my partner, I would always pick Miss Sara Sidle. She keeps me on my toes, and laughing at the same time. I find myself stumbling to keep up with her, she's so fast and smart. But I like that. I like a girl who can put me in my place. Most people assume that since I was a frat boy and because of my reputation, I only like dumb blondes, but that couldn't be farther from the truth. Sara is my dream girl. She is smart, funny, loyal, and yes, beautiful. But her body is not why I love her. That's just an added bonus (that I would like to thoroughly explore). I'm in love with her mind, in all its strangeness, layers, shortcomings, and smarts. I love Sara Sidle, and I always will..
Sign Eight: You get angry and scared when you learned she was trying to act invincible after the lab explosion.
Yeah, I called her on it after it happened. Sara was walking around pulling crazy shit after the lab explosion. I know what it's like to have a gun pulled on you, and it stirs up feelings no one should ever have to experience. I don't want Sara to ever have to go through that, but with our job, it's very possible. Holly Gribbs was murdered on the job, for crying out loud, on her first day. Afterwards, I chewed her out more in the locker room, and made her promise me she wouldn't try anything else. She looked at me like I had wronged her in some way, that I was trying to control her. No one handles Sara Sidle, I've learned. But I will if she ever scares me like that again.
Sign Nine: During a case involving a child, you imagine you and her together raising a family.
Brenda; the kid at the fire; Cassie in particular. I know Sara thinks she'd be a horrible mother and that she's not good with kids, but I see past it. She had a rough childhood so she's a little uneasy, but I can tell her instincts shining through, and she is mad talented. Brenda latched onto her like there was no tomorrow, and Cassie – well, I latched onto her. No child deserves to go through that, and that case made me realize how much I want to be a father. I want to protect someone, have them rely on me, and love them more than I could have ever imagined. And be loved back. I've been floating through life so far, having short-lived relationships with airhead women (I admit it!), and never really settling down. But I have realized I do want to settle down, with Sara Sidle at my side.
Sign Ten: When you're buried alive (which sometimes happens), the only thought in your head, besides the fear, is her.
I'll never forget that day as long as I live, for obvious reasons. But the other reason is that it was the day I realized how much I love Sara Sidle. All I could think about most of those god-awful twelve hours was one person. You can guess who it is. That dark-haired, tall, beautiful, sassy Sara Sidle. I thought about how I wanted to touch her face, to kiss her, to love her the way she deserved. I swore that if I ever got out of that damn coffin, I would act on my feelings. I don't know if it was the adrenaline or what, but after I had fully recovered, I chickened out. I was on my deathbed pretty much, thinking I was taking my last breaths, and I'd thought that under stress and a ream of emotions. But doesn't that say something else? It was Sara I thought of when I thought I was gonna die. What does that mean?
So, there you have it. Ten signs I'm in love with Sara Sidle. Ten reasons to act, but I'm too much of a chicken to do it. I don't know if she's still in love with Grissom. She still looks at him like she is, but she looks at me in a special way too. Why do women have to be so damn confusing? I know how I feel, but she's too difficult to read. Maybe someday, one of us will get the guts to do something about it. Until then, I can only dream about my next encounter with the one and only…Sara Sidle.