Originally, I posted these are three one shots on AO3, but FFN doesn't really do series like AO3 does, so I figure, whatever, I'll just post them as chapters. These I actually did kind of edit.
It's a small comment that does it; Crow doesn't even remember the specifics. He was just being catty, enough that even he can admit it. Just pushing Joker's buttons for the sake of it.
He has it coming when Joker decks him in the face. His head snaps back, and Crow manages a very eloquent, "Shitfuckingsonofabitch," as he stumbles into the elevator door behind him.
He has it coming. If not for the comment itself, then for countless other things.
Nevertheless, it's not the sort of thing he can just let go.
They stare at each other for a moment afterward. Joker, eyes wide behind his mask, mostly looks surprised at his own outburst. Violet stands just of to the side, dithering with her hands partially raised in front of her, as if she had considered trying to physically separate them before deciding it would be a very bad idea. It's just the three of them for now, and it's a good thing; if any of the others were present, they would definitely try to take Crow out at the knees for what's about to follow.
Joker opens his mouth. Probably to apologize. He's got that sort of look about him.
Crow lunges for him before he can. They scuffle in place for a moment, hands locked together, before Joker's back slams into the nearest wall. He sweeps Crow's legs out from under him, but Crow latches onto his arms, claws digging into dark fabric, and both of them wind up in a heap on the floor, scrabbling about like a pair of rats in a gutter.
"Oh! Joker-senpai! Crow!" Violet takes half a step closer to them before thinking better of it. "Stop, stop, stop! We don't have time for this!" The words have no impact on the scuffle at her feet. "Boys! You're both being ridiculous!" Finally, she stomps one foot and retreats a few feet out of range.
Still, it's a brief skirmish. After a few moments, Joker slams Crow's shoulders down onto the tile floor and they come to a halt, his knees bracketing Crow's hips. They're both quiet, save for their breathing.
Crow's eyes narrow, irritation turning searching. He lifts a hand and catches Joker's chin between his fingers. "You look exhausted," he states plainly, turning Joker's face first one way and then the other.
Joker sags like he's just been scolded, pulling his chin from Crow's hold and sitting back on his heels, most of his weight landing on Crow's thighs. Reluctantly, he nods.
Crow inspects him for a moment longer, claws clicking against the floor as he drums his fingers. "May I ask a question?"
"You're going to anyway," Joker grumbles.
"Is there ... any particular reason it's just the three of us in the vanguard right now?" Crow asks, something like his past pleasant tone seeping in, because getting under Joker's skin isn't really something he can just turn on and off like a light switch.
Joker makes a low noise, not words but a demand to drop the subject all the same. Crow continues to stare up at him expectantly.
"The last few days have just been a lot, alright?" he snaps. "And my therapist's too busy dealing with his messiah complex to help unpack it."
"You do recall that your rabbits returned from the looking glass, yes?" Crow points out dryly. "Were you truly so convinced that they wouldn't?" Granted, Crow himself hadn't put much stock in them, but Joker has always been a particular breed of unshakeable.
Joker shakes his head tightly, shoulders rounding defensively. He pulls his arms in, hands fisting against his legs. Shoulders thusly released, Crow props himself up on his elbows.
"It's only partly about that," Joker admits guiltily. "It's stupid and ... kind of selfish, probably?"
"The suspense is killing me," Crow returns blandly. Joker scowls at him half-heartedly, but the expression melts away soon enough.
"This is all because of cognition," he points out, as if Crow has somehow forgotten. "This reality, I mean. And yeah, knowing I talked them out of their dream reality makes me feel like a jackass, but also …" He pauses, eyes drifting to the side as he puts the words together. "I only met any of them because the world isn't perfect. In a perfect world, though?" He huffs out a quiet, nervous laugh. "Before he came to his senses, Ryuji couldn't even remember how we met."
Crow tips his head to the side, picking up on the words that Joker isn't really saying. "You thought you were going to disappear again," he states, eyes narrowing again. "For how long?"
(Violet muffles a low, distraught, "Oh, Senpai…" behind her hands.)
"Basically until they finally showed up in the palace," Joker admits, voice a mumble, like he's ashamed of it. "Haven't really been sleeping."
Crow reaches up with one hand, catching Joker's chin again. Still leaning up on one elbow, getting their eyes to meet is easier this time.
"You're an idiot."
Joker rolls his eyes. "You've always had such a way with words, Crow," he deadpans, starting to pull away. Before he can, Crow shifts his hand back, fingers instead clasping behind Joker's neck, holding him in place.
"You're an idiot," Crow reiterates. "I remember exactly who you are and where we've been. Even if the rest of them had truly forgotten, then I would have ripped my way through whatever cheap two-ply this reality is pieced together from to drag you back by your fucking ankles, because you are not allowed to leave me to shovel this shit with your imbecilic friends on my own." His claws tighten at the back of Joker's neck for a second before easing once again. He smiles, placid and rehearsed. "Have I made myself clear?"
Joker's eyes are wide. His jaw goes tight and he swallows. His fists tighten against his legs until the fabric of his pants begins to crease. "Crystal," he manages, voice shaking. Crow can practically hear him grinding his teeth, but still his composure is slipping away like sand in an egg timer.
Crow slides a look toward Violet. "Would you go waylay the stunt doubles?" he asks pleasantly, in much the same way he once spoke with talk show hosts. "I'm sure you can think of a plausible excuse."
She hesitates a moment, gaze darting back and forth between the two of them. And then she nods, shoulders straightening as she offers, "R-right," and trots back the way they came. Less of an imbecile than the others, then.
And it's just Crow and Joker. Crow's expression evens back out to bland neutrality. "Something here is going to happen," he reasons plainly. "We both know my opinion of you is as low as it can go, so stop wasting your theatrics and just get it over with so we can be done with it."
With permission granted, what is visible of Joker's expression crumples and he makes a low, wounded noise. He folds in on himself, nearly folding himself in half and bringing a hand up over his head, like he's trying to hide even with nothing to hide behind. His other hand grips Crow's wrist.
Joker's shoulders shake, but he's virtually silent. But his grip on Crow's wrist is tight enough to damn near feel it through the gauntlet, and every so often he makes a quiet noise like a wounded animal.
What a sorry sight.
Even so, Crow lets him take his time.
Eventually, Violet peers back around the corner at them, her expression urgent. Because of course the flock can't just mind their own goddamn business. He supposes the few minutes Violet's bought them will have to be enough.
He squeezes the back of Joker's neck. Slowly, Joker sits back up, letting Crow's hand fall away as he does. He shoves his mask up into his hair to aggressively scrub his gloves over his eyes before he gets to his feet. He squeezes the bridge of his nose between two fingers, with the pinched expression of someone now nursing a headache. Nevertheless, he offers his free hand down to Crow.
"How chivalrous," Crow drawls blandly, even as he accepts the hand and lets himself be hauled back upright.
"I mean, I am the one who knocked you on your ass to begin with," Joker points out, voice rough. There's a beat. "And punched you. Sorry."
Crow rolls his eyes as emphatically as he can. "Try not to patronize me," he grouses before he turns and starts walking once more. "Come on. They'll be around the corner in a moment and you still look like shit."
Joker heaves a slow sigh and lets his mask fall back into place. "Charming as ever," he offers as he falls into step behind Crow, the sound of Violet's heels loping after them.
This is probably going to turn into a conversation later. This sort of emotional glurge always does. But Crow supposes he can burn that bridge when they get to it.